Murder at Planet Hollywood

Disclaimer: My best friend Katie helped me write this story. Thank you, Katie wherever you may be! I do not own Harry Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Draco Malfoy, Severus Snape (I love him the most, hence the reason why he's the main character in most of my stories. He is so lonely and needs me…), Ron Weasley, or any other hot guy. Though I wish I did. I don't own the lucky females that all get to work with the hot guys either, which basically means I don't own anything that has to do with the subject Harry Potter, unless I make it up. No fair! I love Darth Vater. He rocks and Robin Hood can still kick his butt, sad? I thought so. Anyways, onto the story! Ps. the title has absolutely nothing to do with the story so you will just have to live with that! HUH!

Chapter 1

"Rachel, so can you come over?" Katie asked over the phone.

"My mom said yes! I'll be there around 3, k?"

"Ok. See you then!"

Rachel and Katie were taking Katie's dog, Cindy, to the dog park when she escaped with Rachel's hotdog. Right behind Cindy was a hungry pack of wolves. "Save that hotdog," Rachel yelled.

"Save my dog too," Katie yelled as she and Rachel chased after the hotdog of life. They ran into the highly dangerous forest with venomous pigs and web-shooting butterflies. But that's not the point. They kept running when they both tripped over a book with a giant, two-mans eating alligator on it. (Two-mans eating means it can eat two mans at once.) As Katie and Rachel stood up the alligator jumped over the moon and landed on the hotdog of life.

Anyways, the book suddenly opened to a page that read, The 7th Harry Potter Book, Title Unknown, Chapter 1. Katie and Rachel peered into the book and suddenly found themselves right outside the Hogwarts Castle. As they walked in they met a man who was…old. (I love the …s!)

"Hello," said the old man with a freakishly long beard. "My name is Albus Dumbledore. We have been expecting you. J.K. Rowling mentioned you in 'secret code'. She also required that Rachel be in Slytherin and Katie in Gryffindor." Dumbledore rushed us…I mean them… to the Great Hall, introduced us, and sat us at our tables.

The next morning Katie was sitting in the Great Hall when Rachel came over and sat down next to her.

"Hey, Katie," Rachel said grabbing a piece of toast with something unknown on it, "I met this really cool boy. He's nice. His name is Draco Malfoy."

"The boy who causes Harry pain and humiliation every day? (Rachel nods) I'm cool with that. Oh, I'm dating Harry Potter."

"The boy who Draco causes pain and humiliation to every day?"

"I just said that, Rachel."

"No you didn't. You said Draco causes Harry pain and humiliation every day and I said…the exact same thing. Oh yeah! Now, back to script. You are dating Harry. So soon? (Katie nods) I'm cool with that." Just then Harry, Ron, and Hermoine sat down at the Gryffindor table across from them. They all glared at Rachel and she stuck her tongue out at them, like a child of the age of 12…couchmyageandKatie'scough…would do.

"What are you doing at our table, Slytherin?" Ron asked with suspiciousness in his voice.

"Because I can. Get used to it, Irish boy. Hey, you should wear a pin that says, 'Kiss me, I'm Irish!' What do you think?" Ron, Harry, and Hermoine looked confused. "Here, I have one in my pocket for no particular reason," Rachel said sticking the pin on him. Katie smiled and tried hard not to laugh. "Hermoine, why do you read so much and have you ever thought of conditioner?" Rachel asked looking at Hermoine's frizzy, big hair.

"I asked her that last night," Katie said. "She told me to bug off. I said I would, but I'm not a bug!" Rachel laughed. Harry and Ron raised an eyebrow at the pathetic joke and Hermoine glared at them. Rachel smirked and asked, "No, really, what kind of conditioner do you use?"

"N.O.Y.B." Hermoine replied.

"Using initial thingies in which I don't remember the name of, I see. I don't need those to tell you what you are. Your hair is stupid," Rachel said now pathetically using quotes from the movie Anchorman.

"Lord Dark Helmet wears a big helmet so at least he doesn't have to worry about bad hair days. Your helmet, it's so big," Katie said pathetically using quotes from Spaceballs. "Does anyone have a Spaceballs the Flamethrower?"

"No, but I have one of those very large hair dryers in my pocket…got to go. I see Draco. I'm bored here and he can probably do me some good. Bye, guys!" Rachel said standing up, smoothing her robes, and then walking over to Draco with a big grin on her face.

TO BE CONTINUED……….

What will happen next? Who knows! Please R&R if you care to find out. Katie and I enjoy reviews…now review! Mwahahahahaha! This chapter was possible by the cow that jumped over the moon, Ross' Chainsaw Services, Spaceballs, Anchorman, Planet Hollywood, Celine Dion, and other random people, places, or things. Thank you for your time…NOW REVIEW! I leave you with this message: the title has absolutely nothing to do with the story. Good day!