Yay! Finally got reviews. That's what I was waiting for. Also, I have a huge history report, had an English report, and couldn't think of what to write. But that's not important. So thus continues the chaos. By the way, the Pharaoh gets rather violent (in a nice way of course) in this one so keep away from immature children. And if you love Weevil, you will despise this chapter.
I don't own Yugioh, Nintendo, Half-Life, Ovaltine, Pokemon, or the Nobel Peace Prize so don't shoot me or anything.
Chapto Two-o: Randomness Ensues Into Violent Measurements of Hysteria, Understated Graphical Images, and Illegal Weapon Abuse. Also known as The Chapter of Joy.
Kaiba decides to gather everyone around in the kitchen, which is pretty hard to do considering everyone basically hates each other at the moment.
"Wheeler, I'm holding you fully responsible for this!" he says to Joey. He's lifting both Mokuba and Yugi up by the arm and dragging them with him, seeing how they are the same size.
"What! Why?" asks Joey, also going into the kitchen.
"Umm…because I hate you."
"Why do ya hate me?"
Seto stands there and looks at the blonde. Yugi and Mokuba are both trying to wriggle free from his grasp. "I don't know. I haven't gotten that far yet."
"Dat's what I thought."
Malik rushes up to him, looking shocked. "Did you just say… you thought? Oh Ra, our little Joey's growing up!" He wipes a fake tear from his eye.
Joey coughs. "Well heh heh. You know, I try."
Anyway, they all finally gather in the kitchen. Malik and Marik accidently drop a carton of eggs (why am I surprised) and start yelling at each other over whose fault it is. Seth and Mokuba are playing chess on the table, Ishizu and Tea were looking through a magazine, Tristan and Joey are playing "Sock of War", which is basically a game they just made up where all you do is sock each other to pass the time. Also, Ryou and Yugi are playing cards while their yamis are sitting next to them making different faces at each other. (If I forgot anyone besides Seto, then they suddenly either had a heart attack and died, or they had to go earn the Nobel Peace Prize.)
"Uh, Bakura?" says Ryou.
"Yes my hikari."
"What are you two doing?"
"We're practicing our different glares for dueling against people."
"Why?" asks Yugi, blinking.
"So that the audience doesn't get bored with our facial expressions." Atem answers.
"Ahh…"
"Okay people! Stop whatever the heck you're doing like I really care and listen to me!" exclaims Seto, entering in.
No one listens.
"Ugh. You freaks! Open your ears!"
Still no one pays any attention.
"I SAID-" he begins until he was socked in the stomach by a fist connected to an arm connected to a shoulder connected to…never mind. Everyone stops what they're doing and looks at Kaiba, who's bent over.
"Of all the days to wear my shirt with fake chain mail…" he mutters.
"Nice one dude!" compliments Joey to Tristan. He raises his hand for a high five, but Tristan ignores it.
'Great…' Tristan thinks
Seto finally stands up and rubs his stomach. "Damn, that probably softened my rock hard abs." He takes off his shirt. All the Seto fangirls start screaming and taking pictures. He poses. They all scream and faint. A zamboni (I don't know how to spell it) driven by Pikachu comes by and pushes all the bodies into a heap. Pikachu winks and gives a thumbs up sign. Pikachu fangirls scream and faint.
Seto walks up to the Pokemon and chucks him out the window saying "Dude, you ruined my groove!"
He walks back into the kitchen with a shirt on and clears his throat. "Ok, I know that you guys messed up my house, so guess what?"
Bakura raises his hand. "Ooh! Ooh! We get to go raid a rest home?"
Seto slaps his forehead. "No you idiot! We-"
Atem stands up. "Hey! I'm the only one allowed to call him that!"
Seto sighs. "Sure, ok. But anyway, you guys have to clean it now." He points to Bakura. "You, Ishtar, Mutou, Ryou (I don't know his last name), and my little brother have to clean the game mess." Bakura scowls.
"Hey, do you really have to call us by our last names?" asks Yugi.
Seto shrugs. "No. But it makes me sound cool and rich and hot." He poses again, making other fangirls faint.
"You know Kaiba," says Atem. "If I haven't known you for as long as I have, I'd think you were talking about rich chocolate Ovaltine." A bunch of kids come to the door, shouting "More Ovaltine Please!" Atem shudders and goes back to sitting and being bored while listening to Kaiba.
"Dude, we broke the Gamecube. Are we supposed to put it back together or something?" asks Marik while holding up pieces of the once playable game system.
"Naw, it's ok Marik. We've got like thirty more." Mokuba's tells him as he enters while pulling a huge box.
"That's right we bought extras when we heard all you creeps are staying here for a week." Seto mutters.
"Why are we staying here for a week anyway?" asks Malik, his chin resting on his fist. Marik and Ishizu scowl.
"Do you not remember Malik? Let me refresh your memory…" Ishizu begins.
Flashback
"Ishizu! This effing fly keeps buzzing around me!" Malik yells while trying to build a tiny pyramid out of the junk in his room, which he was supposed to be cleaning.
"Then take a shower and clean your room!" comes the response.
"I don't wanna!" he whines. Then he gets an idea lightbulb over his head. He looks up and sees it. "What the crap?" He shrugs and gets his millennium rod. "Come here you filthy beast, come-"
"Did you call me Malik?" asks Marik, who's passing by.
Malik rolls his eyes. "No." He looks for the fly and sees it on the wall. He grins and points his rod towards it. Unfortunately for him, the fly moves and the house disappears beneath his feet.
End Flashback
Malik grins sheepishly. "Oh yeah…"
"How about you Ryou?" asks Yugi.
Ryou looks at Bakura. "Why don't you tell them, yami?"
Bakura looks innocently at the rest. "Well, the house was attacking me." They stared at him. "A piece of ceiling fell on me!"
"And whose fault was that?" Ryou asks.
"Well you're certainly not implying that it was mine, are you?"
"Bakura, you tried to kill our parrot with a sledge hammer and got it stuck in the wall, causing the ceiling the break!"
"Well I'm sorry I'm not as scientific as you. Plus," mutters Bakura. "That parrot was trying to intimidate me."
"Parrot's talk. I thought you know that."
Bakura shrugs. He hears laughter next to him and turns. "Is something funny Pharaoh?" he growls.
The Pharaoh's cracking up in front of him. "I'm sorry Tomb Robber. It's just I didn't know you scare so easily. Over a little birdie."
Bakura scowled. "Well I seem to remember you having a thing with… rats."
"A RAT? WHERE! O MY RA! THE LAST ONE I SAW ALMOST ATE ME!" Atem jumps up pulling an AK47 out of… a hole, in the ground. Yeah. Bakura starts rolling on the floor laughing. Atem's eyes narrow. "You. Snake…" he mutters darkly. A hush falls over the room. Bakura stops laughing.
"Not a good idea to get the Pharaoh angry man…" says Marik. Bakura swallows.
Seto cuts in. "What are you guys smoking? I've gotten him mad at me plenty of times."
"No, no you haven't. If you did, you would be dead. I've seen him angry once. That was when he was dueling Weevil on the train." Tea says quietly.
"A WEEVIL! WHERE!" shouts Atem, throwing away the AK47 and pulling a double barrel shotgun out of the weapon hole. At that moment, Weevil and Rex walk into the room.
Weevil starts to speak. "Hey guys! What's goin-" Unfortunately, he could not finish his sentence because he had no head to do it with.
"Aww Weevil," says Rex disgustedly. "I told you that if you ever got your head blown off by the Pharaoh, don't do it near me. Now I've got you brains all over my new shirt!"
Atem turns to Seth, who is by the hole of weaponry.
"Seth, grab me a chainsaw, will you?" he asks.
Seth puts his hand into the hole. "Uh, how 'bout a crowbar?" Atem shrugs and Seth tosses it to him.
He looks over Weevil and grins. "Time to die Bug Boy."
Marik taps him on the shoulder. "Uh sorry to break it to ya, but the guy's already dead." he whispers.
"Shh, don't tell anyone." Atem mumbles. Marik nods and backs away. The Pharaoh raises the crowbar above his head. "Muahahahahahahahaha!" he laughs. He sees Ryou give him a weird look. "Just for effect." he explains. As he starts bringing the crowbar down, he hears: "There is my ultimate weapon of great insanity and deadliness." Everyone looks and sees Gordon Freeman (if you've never played Half-Life then you may not understand, but just go w/ it) standing there with a scientist next to him whose head was being held by a headcrab.
"Sorry but I'm gonna need that back. You can have my grenade launcher though." he says as he trades the crowbar for a huge grenade launcher. Gordon then walks with the scientist out the back door. Atem blinks and tosses his new weapon to Seth.
"Here, you can have my sword." came two voices from behind him. He turns and sees two blonde haired teens with green clothing and green hats handing him a sword each. One is younger and smaller while the other looks about Kaiba's age and height.
"Thanks…" says Atem as he takes the blades and begins chopping Weevil into pieces. Suddenly, girls run toward the green clothed teens screaming "OMYGODIT'SLINKOMYGODIT'SLINKOMYGODIT'SLINK!" Seto's fangirls were after the older Link (if you haven't played the Legend of Zelda, then your on the same page as those who haven't played Half-Life. But try and go along w/ it. : )) and Mokuba's fangirls were running after the younger. The boys both ran away yelling "Goddesses save us!"
Atem stands up and walks to the table with a big platter in his hands, rather disturbed by the scene he just witnessed. He grins anyway. "Who wants some bite size Weevil McNuggets?" The rest of the yamis (Seth, Bakura, Malik) ran over to the table and started eating along with the Pharaoh. Everyone else just stared at them, disgusted.
"Pharaoh. You're… a cannibal." stammered Tea, a little frightened.
"Am not! You're only a cannibal if you eat a person, and Weevil is not a person." Everybody agreed. Yugi had developed a twitch because of watching his yami do what he did for the past half hour.
FINALLY, after all that, Seto assigned more places for them to clean, there was more arguing and shouting, more weapons taken out of the weaponry hole, but at last they were calm.
Until Ryou brought in the sugar…