Hello everyone! Thank you once again for reviewing my chapters, it really means a lot to me. I'm glad you liked how the dress thing turned out; I actually took the idea from "What a Girl Wants", the movie which Amanda Bynes starred in. Anyways, this chapter and maybe the next may have some sad moments, but I promise happy moments will totally take over after. Hopefully you'll like this chapter also and won't throw rotten fruits at me after… -takes an umbrella just in case-
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Review of last chapter

"… I'm Kinomoto Sakura, but you can call me Sakura. Other people call me Saki or Saku, but I don't like it. You can call me Saki or Saku, I won't be mad, well maybe a little mad, but not all mad." Sakura suddenly recited, the words flowing from her lips. Syaoran's head snapped up, staring at her with strong intensity. His mind whirled, the situation swirling in his head.

"Um... all right..."

"I'm Syaoran... Li Syaoran. Well no one ever called me by a nickname... so I guess you can call me Syaoran, if you wanna." Syaoran recited in the same way Sakura had suddenly said it. Sakura's eyes teared as a single crystal drop ran down her face.

"Syao… Syaoran…"

"Saku… Sakura…"

"It's you!"
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Chapter 10: Mistakes and fears.

Tomoyo let out a deep breath as the final of the children were picked up by their parents. Her mouth ached in pain having to smile all night to people she had no reason to smile to (namely Gwen), her voice, she was sure, was sure to be hoarse by tomorrow from stretching it to its limit. She brushed a strand of her raven hair out of her sight that had escaped from the bun that lay on the back of her head from the frenzied night. From the kids' ballroom, she was still able to hear the party sounds that escaped from the living room. Images of beautiful people in gorgeous gowns and suits waltzing around the hugely lit room, gentle music floating in the air as they leaned against their loved ones, the ones they cared for, the ones they knew cared for them back. She could almost feel the soft material of her own gown brush against her sensitive skin; she could feel the swish of her raven hair flying behind her as she twirled around in the hands of her partner, she would be one of them. She would fit in, mix inside the blend of all the other finely dressed people. But then the brush of her own black, cotton outfit brought her out of her daydream and she knew that would never happen. She heaved a sigh.

"Are children really that horrible? An amused voice came from the door. Tomoyo spun around, alarmed that someone would actually be still awake at this time of night. Eriol leaned against the door frame casually, the fringes of his blue hair falling over the midnight eyes that described his whole character; curious, mysterious. His glasses shone from the light, his lips playing a small smile. Tomoyo blushed.

"Hirrigazawa-san." Tomoyo said automatically, bowing slightly. "I didn't think you'd still be here." Eriol laughed, remembering what had happened just minutes before…

Flashback

As the group started to decrease one by one, Eriol rose along with the others. The two empty seats indicated that Sakura and Syaoran still hadn't returned he bit back a smile that threatened to rise. He had saw Gwen angrily stomp back to her room half an hour after the two's little disappearance and he let out a satisfied smirk. He, of course, preferred Sakura over her. Just when he was about to leave, he saw a flash of raven black hair from the kids ball room, where he knew, by now, it would be empty. His mind wondered back to the first day he had seen the maid.

Beautiful, smooth, shining raven hair that ran down her back and ended at her small waist. She had such beautiful amethyst eyes that shone with innocence and purity. Her white skin contrasted with the darkness of her hair, yet it fit together so well, like a puzzle. She made him feel feelings he had never felt with another woman. The spark in his heart, the rush of his blood, the way his mind turned blank when ever she was around. It was bliss. She was bliss. Following her, he saw her enter the ballroom, which he assumed must be cleaning up. He decided he would wait, wait for her to come out, where he will 'accidentally' bump into her, say sorry, and ask if he could escort her back to her room, or maybe take her out for a small dinner some time to apologize. But as he paced around the corridor, his heart beating so soundly he was so sure it could be heard, she did not come out. His curiosity getting the better of him, he peeked in the room to see what was happening.

There she was, her hair trapped behind her head, standing in those ugly uniforms his cousin had ordered. He really needed to talk to him about his fashion choices, and his fashion senses. Yet she still looked magnificent. Seeing her open her eyes, he started to panic, afraid she might be frightened by his presence, thinking quickly, he thought of the only thing that came to his mind. Leaning comfortably against the door frame, he did his best to look casual, his heart still pounding in his chest…

End of Flashback

"I was the last one to leave the living room, I had thought everyone had left too, guess I was wrong." Eriol replied well naturedly. Tomoyo laughed lightly.

"Yes I suppose so. I suggest you return to your room Hiirigazawa-san. This place is no place for a person like you." She spoke, gesturing to the messy room. Eriol raised an eye brow.

"I'm not that bad you do not want me to stay, am I?" Eriol said mocked hurt. Tomoyo's eyes widened, shaking her hand quickly.

"No! No of course not! I just thought that, well since this place is, well it is a mess and, well…" Tomoyo stuttered, only to meet the laughter coming out of Eriol's mouth. Tomoyo immediately shut up, her cheeks blushing red, realizing she had just been tricked. Her blood boiled. "That was not nice. I was trying to be nice, be courteous, I guess I wasted it." She shot back, slightly angered.

"No, No please. I was only joking, I'm sorry." Eriol apologized quickly, though his eyes said the exact opposite. Tomoyo huffed, turning her back against him.

"By the way, have you seen Sakura by any chance? She said she would come by after the whole thing was over." She said her mind drifting back to the people dancing, the music drifting… her in the arms of her own lover…

"Come to think of it, they have been out for a while now…" Eriol responded.

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Sakura slowly backed her way closer to the tree, her eyes wide. The moonlight filtered through the branches of the ancient oak tree, sending her a glow of pure innocence, forming a small halo on top of her auburn head.

Her body shook with disbelief while she silently muttered to herself. No… it can't be. Not him, he can't be him. This wasn't Syaoran, the boy whom she had met atop of the hill so many years ago. This wasn't the guy who promised to be her friend, who promised to keep in touch. This wasn't the man that he had turned to be, the boy whom left her in the dark for so many years. He can't be the boy who shared the exact 'abnormal ness' she, herself, had.

He can't be the one she had fallen for.

Syaoran felt his breath hitch as his eyes feasted upon her shaking form. How could he have not recognized? How could he have missed the angelic form that so reminded him of the younger girl he had met? The pure, innocent girl that hadn't given him a single thought about what he may be and wanted to be friends with him immediately. Friends… that word seemed so foreign to him before, but ever since that encounter, the word seemed warm, comforting even. How could he have been so stupid? How could he have been so blind to not have recognized her that instant? Her innocent look, her pure heart, her beautiful personality. How could he have ignored the very one that had stolen his heart away from the first day he had laid eyes on her?

"Sakura…" he breathed. Sakura felt her heart skip yet another beat. The way her name just slipped out of his mouth like that. "You're really Sakura…"

Sakura took all the will power she had not to just lunge out at him and hug him in a tight death grip. She kept her lips shut, not allowing a single peep through.

"It's really you… Sakura…"

Sakura couldn't help it. Her defences were lowering so dangerously low she knew it would be anytime before she would totally submit into its power. Anytime now… she would lunge herself at him… anytime…

"I've missed you…" Syaoran said quietly. Sakura snapped her eyes up at him, the words he spoke suddenly igniting an angry fire. Angry tears sprung for her eyes, angry at herself for showing weakness, yet unable to stop the tears that now streamed down her face. Syaoran stood surprised at the tears leaking from her eyes. His first instinct was to wrap her frail body against his. Taking a step forward, he found her taking a step backwards, away from him. His blood ran cold.

"You've missed me?" Sakura suddenly found herself shouting behind her tears. She let out a cold laugh she never heard herself use before. "That's funny because from the past 25 years, I haven't heard a single damn word from you! I prayed for you everyday, wishing you were happy. I convinced myself that you were my friend, that you wouldn't abandon me like my family, and that I actually mattered!" Sakura shouted, her tears falling faster, thicker.

"I didn't. I never forgot about you. I thought of you everyday after that." Syaoran argued, not wanting her to cry.

"Yea and I was in your mind for so long, so long that you've gotten married and have kids. I was really that important." Sakura cried sarcastically, her heart ripping every time she had said that. In all honesty, she wanted nothing more than to have him hold her, to have him tell her that everything was ok, that everything was going to be ok, that he was going to take care of her. But once the thought of him, the first friend she EVER had, and she had fallen for him, she couldn't bare it. So she thought of the only thing that she thought would be better. She separated herself from him.

Syaoran couldn't believe what she was saying. Had he said something wrong?

"Sakura I-"

"Save it Li. I've had enough." She said in the coldest voice she could muster, using all the strength she had left to make sure her voice wasn't quivering. Before she could do anything she would regret, she immediately left, turning around, striding out. A hand shot out, grabbing her wrist. She turned to meet a pair of hurt amber eyes.

"Sakura…" he breathed again. Sakura's eyes filled once again with tears, this time, her heart would be leaking away from her as well.

"I'm sorry… I can't. We, maybe we just weren't meant to be… I'm sorry." She breathed, placing her lips one last time on his warm cheeks, her tears wetting his cheeks. What she would give to just stay there forever, she pulled back with full regret, before finally walking away, leaving Syaoran standing there alone, a cold breeze whipping through the air.

Syaoran stood there stunned, his hand lingering on the left side of his cheeks, where warm tear stains were left and the imprint of a pair of lips lingered, as if burned into his skin, never to be washed off.

"I'm sorry… maybe we just weren't meant to be…"

"I'm sorry…sorry…sorry…"

Syaoran's mind could hear nothing more. His heart felt empty, as though a piece had left him, leaving a great gap in his heart where empty void filled it. Silently, a single crystal tear fell down his own cheek, the tear that he knew, would signify that the most important person in his life had just left him.

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Sakura's tears were finally left loose as they streamed down. Just when she thought she had no more, more had filled her eyes, and more had rolled down her tear stained face. She ran past Eriol and Tomoyo, not bothering to say hi, or bye. Tomoyo watched her friend rush past.

"What's wrong?" she wondered. Eriol shrugged.

"I'm not sure. But I'm sure she's fine." Eriol lied, placing on his most convincing voice. What ever happened out there couldn't have been good; he just wished Syaoran hadn't just done something incredibly stupid.

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Her door slammed behind her as she flung herself onto her bed. Oh how she wished this was all a dream. She wished that tomorrow morning, once she woke up, it would all be a dream, nothing had happened. She had not fallen in love with her friend, her first friend, her best friend. A silent knock came on her door. Afraid it was Syaoran she didn't open it.

"Please, go away." She cried out hoarsely, not wanting to face him right now.

"Kinomoto-san. It's me." Gwen's voice came from the other side of the door. She cleared up her face, wiping the remaining tears off her face, before opening the door.

"Miss Hilton. I'm sorry." Sakura said softly, allowing the blond to enter her room.

"My god! What happened to you?" Gwen gasped, seeing Sakura's puffy eyes. Sakura let out a sob.

"I'm sorry. I-was…" but she was lost for words. She didn't know what to say. She had just remembered that Gwen was Syaoran's fiancée.

"Men… they are so arrogant, so ignorant. They have no idea how hard it is to be woman." Gwen said suddenly in a gentle voice. "They think everything is so fine, so perfect, that the worse mistakes can be mended with a single word, a single hug, a single kiss. They don't know what it means to women, and I guess they never will. Miss Kinomoto. Do you know what a woman fears most?" Gwen asked innocently. Sakura stayed quiet. "They fear what they want most. They fear that the most important thing would be taken away from them." Gwen said quietly, "love. We all adore the feeling it gives, but we all fear it for it may be taken away so easily." Saying all she had to say, she gently placed her hand on Sakura's shoulder, before leaving the room. Guilt shot through her, thinking about what she had just said. Had she just ruined a relationship? Did her presence actually stop a couple from being together?

Immediately, she pulled out her suitcase from under the bed. Not caring if her clothes would crumple or not, she tore her clothes off the hangers from the rack and stuffed them into her suitcase. She changed out of the beautiful snowy white cloth and into one of her pale blue dresses. Hastily zipping up the suitcase, she gently placed the delicate material on the bed, along with the shoes she had borrowed. Taking a slip of paper from the table, she wrote her final letter.

Her eyes zoomed across the large, marble room. Every detail, every flower, every corner was memorized and etched into her brain. This would be the last time she would be here. And she knew, even if her body had left this place, her mind, and her heart would always linger her. Placing an envelope on the table, she left the house, the door closing gently behind her, a small click echoing around the house.

-Next Morning-

Syaoran trudged down sluggishly from a bad night's sleep. Or to be honest, he hadn't had any sleep at all. His mind was still on last night's events, the tears, the shouts, the screams, and the pain. Slowly, the family started to come to life after a while night of dancing and playing. One by one, children, teenagers, adults, maids, and many others came down preparing for the morning.

Within the swelling number, one was missing. One angel was lost from the group. His eyes strayed to the envelope on the table that was laid down ever so gently. Ripping it opened, his eyes scanned through the letter. Wet drops indicated that whoever wrote this, was crying. His hands automatically scrunched it up and ripped it into pieces, throwing them on the floor. The tiny, ripped pieces slowly fell onto the floor along with it, the remaining pieces of his heart.

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Dear Syaoran,

I know by the time you have read this, I will be gone from this house, from your family, and from your life. I know that every since I've been here, I've made everything wrong. I wasn't supposed to be the one who was to have taken your heart. It was suppose to be the one you have, Miss Hilton. She is a wonderful woman, she cares deeply for you; please don't take her for granted.

The children please help me extend my apologies to them. Tell them I wish them the very best. Tell them that where ever they go, or where ever I go, I will never forget them. Never. The times I've spent with them are just too precious, too unforgettable.

Syaoran, you are the most amazing person I have ever met. It has been a pleasure meeting you. The time we spent together, even though it may be slightly not normal, but I will treasure forever in my heart. I know what happened last night may have affected the relationship between us, but I would always like to remember you as a friend, my very best friend. I wish you the very best in the future, and with Miss Hilton.

With love,

Kinomoto Sakura
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A/N: Wow, I'm sorry I haven't updated for so long. But first few weeks of school, everything is so hectic. I hope this chapter was worth the wait. I didn't enjoy writing this chapter much; it makes our favourite couple so terribly sad. So we had some Gwen evilness, some Sakura and Syaoran sadness, and if you guys caught it, some little Eriol and Tomoyo fluff. I hope you enjoyed it.

Next Chapter: Syaoran pains over the loss of Sakura meanwhile Gwen plans the wedding. The kids visit Sakura and some wise comment from the ever so wise sister.