Chapter Seven
The
first thing Mark did was hit a payphone. It was late by this point,
but he didn't care. The phone rang, and his mother answered. Mark
made her get up and look around the house (namely in Mark's old room)
and see if Roger came by, or if Roger had talked to her in anyway.
Nope, he wasn't there. Mark thanked her and hung up.
He walked up
to the CBGB's and looked there. Nothing. He went to the Pyramid club.
Nothing there either. No sign of him at the Cat Scratch, or back at
the Life. Mark went to Roger's old haunts when he and April were
still dating, doubting he'd be there, and coming up empty handed. He
saw the man—Jerry, Mimi had said once? who said he'd seen him. That
was the best news he heard all night. The man continued to tell him
that he left with some black person. Mark thanked him and started
thinking of who Roger could have left with. And what was he doing
with the man? Hopefully nothing.
"Damn, how long have I been
doing this?" he wondered when he saw the sky lighten as the sun
started coming up. He was tired, but needed to find Roger. Finally,
he called Collins. Nothing there. Roger obviously wasn't with Joanne,
so that left Benny.
Mark called Benny's house. He was angry that
Roger couldn't be found very easily, but still found himself getting
nervous about what he would do if Roger wasn't at Benny's.
Benny's
eyes fluttered opened as he heard the phone ring. He groggily rolled
over and looked at the clock. 5:43.
He groped for the phone on
the nightstand before picking it up.
"Hello?" he said,
sleep still etched in his voice.
"Benny, it's Mark." he said bluntly. "Please, for the love of God, tell me you know where Roger is. I've looked EVERYWHERE and all I know is he went somewhere with a black guy." Mark reeled this off quickly out of concern and exhaustion.
"Huh?" Benny said, Mark's words not sinking in at first. "Oh, Roger. Yeah, he's over here," Benny replied before running his hand over his face.
"He
is?" Mark was relieved. "Can--" He was going to say
"Can I talk to him?" but then realized what a not-so-good
idea that would be.
"Well, could you take him home in a
little while?" Mark asked. "Because we kind of miss him at
home." After he hung up the phone, Mark headed home, damn near
collapsing on the way there. He somehow made it up the stairs to the
top floor.
Benny
just stared at the phone for a minute before hanging up. It was
almost 6 in the morning. If they could wait this long, they could
wait a little bit longer.
Benny's head hit the pillow and he was
out like a light once again.
"Roger's fine," Mark said
to who ever was in the apartment. He was so glazed over and tired, he
didn't know if anyone was there, much less if they cared. He stumbled
over to the couch and was asleep almost as soon as his head hit the
lumpy cushion.
Mimi
had fallen asleep at the window but the door woke her up.
She
smiled a little at Mark's words, expecting to see Roger walk
through the door in a few seconds. But he didn't. She sighed before
getting up and grabbing the blanket Mark had brought out earlier. She
draped it across him before heading back into her room and collapsing
on the bed, sleep overcoming her within seconds.
Benny
rolled over with a yawn and looked at the clock. 8:15. Wonderful. He
looked at Allison, who was still asleep, and quietly got out of bed.
He figured he should probably get Roger the hell out of here before
she woke up. She would have a fit if she knew he was still hanging
around "those people."
Benny rolled out of bed and
stretched a little before jumping in the shower. He washed up quickly
before pulling on a pair of khakis and a polo shirt. Then he walked
out into the living room and tapped Roger on the leg.
"C'mon buddy. Time to get you home."
The sun was attacking. Maureen had been in the middle of a great dream when the bright, happy sunlight began streaming in the window, assaulting her closed eyelids. She tried rolling over, hiding under the blankets and pulling a pillow over her head, but it was no use. She was awake now and there was nothing to be done about it. Mark, meanwhile, was completely unconscious on the couch. "Damn it, Mark. We need to buy you curtains," she told his almost-dead form. Not like Maureen intended on spending many more mornings waking up in Mark's bedroom...Lazily, she stretched and sat up, pulling herself out of Mark's bed. She subconsciously tugged at the end of Mark's t-shirt she had used as a nightgown and wandered out into the main room of the loft. She needed coffee.
Mimi
rolled over as the sun poured in on her. She didn't want to wake up
but did anyway. She needed to prepare herself for the battle that was
sure to ensue once Roger got home.
I wonder where he is...
Mimi thought to herself.
She grabbed her Japanese style robe and
pulled it around her tiny body, stretched a little and walked out
into the main room. She saw Mark still knocked out on the couch and
smiled a little before seeing Maureen.
"Morning girl,"
she said, perching herself on top of the steel table. "Mark
found Roger... he's... just not here."
Mark looked so cute while he was sleeping… Maureen looked away from the camera man and smiled at Mimi when she came in, "Good. Where was he?" Maureen poked through the cabinets until she came upon a small can with whatever was left of the coffee in it and proceeded to make it. She sat down with two mugs and handed one to Mimi.
Mimi
frowned a little.
"Mark never told me," she said
matter-of-factly.
She got down off the table and went over to
Mark. She knelt down next to him.
"Mark... wake up babe, come
on," she slapped him lightly on the cheek a couple times.
"Where's Roger?"
Roger
muttered something as he stirred awake.
It took him a moment to
figure out where he was and another to remember just why he was
there. Roger gave a soft groan and sat up.
He looked to Benny,
rubbing his eyes only slightly before they came into focus. "I
s'pose now is the best time over any..." he muttered. Roger
didn't really wish to stick around when Alison woke up anyway. Seeing
Benny's wife always put him in a bad mood. He didn't want to be that
way when he spoke to Mark and Mimi.
Benny nodded a little. He went into the kitchen as Roger got himself situated and left Alison a note.
Alison--
Had to take
care of some business with the investors. Don't worry about dinner--
I'll bring something home.
Benny
He came back out and
silently led the way downstairs and out the door to his Range
Rover.
The ride to Roger's building was silent. Roger was still
half asleep and Benny was stuck in his head, evaluating and
re-evaluating his life. He feared he'd made a big mistake doing this,
just as he had when he was trying to convince Roger that he and Mimi
still had something... even though they did. But this time, it seemed
a little too drastic. This time, Benny actually regretted it.
He
slowly pulled up outside the building and put his Range Rover in
park.
"Well, here we are," he said with a sigh. "You
gonna be okay?"
It
was now or never for Roger.
"Yeah..I'll be fine..."
Roger replied. Physically, he'd be able to make it upstairs to the
loft. Emotionally? Well, he wasn't so sure.
He took a deep breath
and got out of the car.
"Alright
man," Benny said before shifting his vehicle back into drive.
"Good luck."
With that, he drove away from the east
village.
Mark
jumped as soon as Mimi touched him. He wasn't usually a very light
sleeper, but at the moment he was worried about Roger.
"What?"
He said, looking around before seeing Mimi. Why didn't I take off
my glasses? he wondered. He shook it off. That wasn't really an
important thought. "Oh, Roger was at Benny's. I made Benny swear
to bring Roger back ASAP, so he should be here soon, I reckon."
Mark yawned and stretched. His hair was everywhere from having slept
so hard on it and his clothes were all wrinkled; he didn't care. He
looked over into the kitchen and saw Maureen standing there in his
clothes. That was actually kinda sexy...
No, bad Mark. No thoughts
about the ex.
Maureen caught Mark staring at her and gave him a flirtatious smile. Then she headed back into his room to get changed. Maureen had to go apartment hunting and it wouldn't help if she got distracted by Mark.
"Benny's?
What the fuck is he doing at Benny's?" Mimi asked. It's
not like they'd exactly made up over what happened so this just
didn't make sense to her.
She went back over to the window with a
sigh and saw Benny's range rover pull up outside the building.
"Well,
he's here..." she announced, more to herself than to anyone
else. She swallowed hard and took a few deep breaths. She needed to
keep herself in control if she wanted to get this all back to normal
and everything to work out.
She hoped with everything in her
heart that he would come in, pick her up in his arms and apologize
for how stupid he had acted. But she knew it wasn't going to happen.
A lump formed in her throat but she swallowed again, making it
stay down. She wasn't going to cry. She was just going to make sure
that Roger knew nothing was happening. And she would stop at nothing
to make sure that happened.
As
Benny drove off, Roger stood at the entrance to his building for a
moment. He then took another deep breath and entered, making his way
slowly up the stairs.
Once he reached the door to the loft, Roger
hesitated once more.
Taking another deep breath and telling
himself he would not blow up at Mark or Mimi as soon as he saw
them, he slowly opened the door.
"Roger!"
Mark said. To be honest, he wasn't really that surprised, but more or
less shocked. Then again, he was having an internal conflict at the
moment: He still wasn't sure if he wanted to see Roger now. Sure, on
the one hand he was worried sick about his friend, but now that he
was alright, he wasn't sure he wanted to talk to him. The insult of
yesterday had hit such a low blow that he didn't know if he wanted to
be the one that started the conversation or the one who ended it.
So
he played it safe. He didn't say anything. He was so tempted to look
at Mimi to see how she was going to react, but didn't want to spare
the glance in the slight chance that it would look strange. So he
settled on staring at something...he wasn't quiet sure what to look
at, but once he found something, he would stare at it. And he did:
Maureen. At least it was a pretty view.
Maureen could feel Mark's eyes still burning into her. It was a rather uncomfortable sensation, but not one that Maureen was so unfamiliar with. She had been dealing with stares since she was twelve years old and her figure began to develop. But what made this stare so uncomfortable was the weight behind it. She needed to get out of there. This was between Mark, Roger and Mimi. They didn't need Maureen there, interjecting comments. So, with Mark's stare still on her, she quickly stood and slipped out the front door so as not to interrupt the conversation already begun between Mimi and Roger. Once in the rundown hallway, Maureen realized that she didn't know where to go next. So she just started walking.
Mimi
found it hard to turn from the window to face Roger. She had tears
welling in her eyes for reasons she couldn't quite come up with. She
bit her lip and turned around slowly, her eyes gazing at the floor
before eventually making their way up to look at Roger. But as
quickly as she looked at him, she looked away. She hated feeling like
this, so trapped. She didn't know what to say because she knew
nothing would make the situation better if Roger wasn't willing to
try to change it and listen to what they had to say. And the blank
expression on his face left his thoughts to anyone's guess.
She
had the urge to run into his arms, to apologize for something that
wasn't her fault, but she restrained herself, and instead walked up a
few steps closer. The tension was palpable and uncomfortable. Mimi
took a strand of her hair in her finger and twisted it before finally
deciding to take the first step.
"We... we missed you,"
she struggled to say. "How're you feeling?"
Damn,
Mimi had courage. Now Mark felt like a coward. He found, however,
that he couldn't say anything when he tried to. Not that he knew what
he would have said.
"Yeah," he said lamely to what Mimi
said. That sounded wonderful, didn't it?
"Maureen,"
he said. She was gone. As much as he wanted to figure all of this
out, he didn't want to be there when these two went at it for one,
and for two he didn't want Maureen to leave with the wrong
impression. And he needed her support right now.
"Maureen,
wait!" he said, bolting out the door after her. He caught her at
the bottom of the stairs. "Maureen, please. Come back up here? I
want to talk to you," He said. He was already formulating what
he was going to say in his mind. She really had no business here,
especially right now, but after what had happened last night, he just
wanted her there. Damn it, he was falling in love with her again, and
that would cause problems, but right now he had immediate problems to
take care of. "Please?" Maureen froze when she heard Mark
call to her. Mark wanted her there? But why? She glanced towards the
front door and then back up the stairs towards the loft. The freedom
of the outside was tempting, but Mark wouldn't have asked her to stay
if he didn't really want, or need, her to be there. Hesitantly she
began the trek back up the stairs and slipped back through the door
of the loft. If Mark wanted her to stay, she would stay. But she was
determined to keep her mouth shut.
Mark looked back at the door.
He needed to get back in there and confront Roger. "Just come
inside!" he called down the stairs before coming in again. He
left the door open, and was now facing Roger.
"We're glad
your back, Roge," he said. He was trying to direct the
conversation to the obvious without the fight happening. Naturally,
that's not the way it would work, but something had to be done.
"Um...Maureen stayed the night last night. I was out here on the
couch." Mark gestured toward the door which Maureen just left
from. As if that clarified something that (a) didn't need to be
clarified and (b) wasn't asked about. But at least it was
conversation.
Mimi's
heart had dropped when Mark left. She needed a rock there, and since
Roger was on the opposite side, Mark was the next best thing. She
didn't feel like fighting, but knew that if he left that's what would
ensue.
Luckily for her, he came back in and began an awkward
conversation with Roger.
"I slept in my bed. Well, actually
I fell asleep at the window when Mark went looking for you. I was
going to but I wasn't feeling too hot so Mark went." She was
trying to be encouraging and caring, and trying to show that she was
willing to be civil. "Then when Mark got back I went to bed.
Because he woke me up when he came in." Just as quickly as she
felt this was going well, she felt like it was going to shit
again.
Mimi paused before a flood of emotions overcame her that no
longer could be contained.
"Roger, I have no idea where this
all came from but there is nothing going on between Mark and
I. I love you, baby, and only you. No one else. I can't even imagine
myself without you. I know we've gone through shit before, and I know
I've done things before that probably shouldn't make you trust me,
but I swear to you there is nothing going on between us. I just... I
don't know what I can say to make you believe me."
Mimi felt
defeated. Roger's face still remained blank and his silence was
deafening.
"Mimi's
right," Mark said at last. How do you prove you're not
doing something. There's no evidence, precisely because you're
not doing it. "There is nothing going on between us. We're
friends, Roger, and you know that. You should know that I wouldn't do
that to you." He was going to add Mimi's name, but remembered
she did do that to him, so he changed directions. "Look, you're
just going to have to trust us about this. There's nothing going on
and there won't be."
Just then Maureen came back into the
loft. Mark felt suddenly relieved. He took her hand lightly. "I
wanna talk to you, okay? Can you just wait until we figure this out?"
Mark said quietly so only Maureen could hear him. He let her go and
faced Roger and Mimi again. Damn it. Mimi was crying. If there was
one thing Mark couldn't stand, it was a woman crying. He almost
naturally went over to Mimi to comfort her, but by the time he got
there, he realized what it would look to Roger. So, again, he
improvised.
"See? We don't even make a good couple." he
said, standing next to Mimi. He hoped that just by standing by her
she would be somehow comforted, since he couldn't give her a hug. God
only knows what that would do.
Roger
had stayed silent as Mimi spoke. He looked away when she started to
cry. Like Mark, he couldn't stand a woman in tears. Especially if
that woman was Mimi. He was about to speak when Mark spoke up. He
listened to his roommate silently.
Mimi looked away. She hated to
look weak in this situation, but it was clearly tearing her apart
inside. She wiped away her tears with the back of her hand, leaving
trails of black from her make-up she wore last night on her
cheeks.
"Please say something," Mimi said quietly to
Roger.
Roger took a deep breath. "I'm going to my room,"
he told her as calmly as he could.
Mimi's eyes shifted around the
room. That wasn't exactly what she wanted to hear. She bit her top
lip as she nodded a little.
"Okay," she choked out,
trying to hold back her tears.
She walked over to the window and
opened it. She grabbed her sweater from the floor where she'd left it
the night before and then climbed out the window and up the fire
escape to the roof.
Roger watched Mimi go before heading to his
room.
Mark crossed back to Maureen. "This isn't over yet." Mark stated the obvious. "But I do really want to talk to you, and I will before all of this is over." He took both of her hands in his. "I'm sorry you have to see all of this, but I really need someone who will be there for me right now." And Roger won't. Hell, Roger is WHY he needs someone to stand with him right now.
"It's okay Mark. I really don't mind." In fact, all this fighting was driving Maureen crazy. She just couldn't wrap her mind around what was happening. But she figured that it was fate's retribution for all the time's Mark was stuck in the middle of a fight with her and Joanne. That was when Roger burst into the room yelling about excuses and the box of his gifts to Mimi. Maureen watched as Mimi and Mark tried to plead with him and explain.
Once
alone, Roger let out a breath of frustration and ran a hand through
his hair. First to get out of the day-old clothes he wore. He went
over to his dresser and opened a drawer, starting to dig through it.
He couldn't find the shirt he was looking for. Unnerved, he silently
went over to Mimi's things. She had been known to borrow his shirts
and wear them around the loft. As soon as he began digging, Roger
noticed that there were a few things of hers that were missing. After
he found the shirt he was looking for, Roger continued looking
through Mimi's things. As he did so, he began to realize what all was
missing. They were his gifts to her...
Meanwhile, Mimi needed to
be alone. She just couldn't handle her emotions right now. She needed
a chance to get everything sorted out in her head. She took a seat,
leaning against one of the heating units that weren't being used. She
pulled her knees to her chest, resting her chin on top of them. A few
tears rolled down her cheek but she quickly wiped them away again.
Mimi pinched her sleeves around her hands and let the chilling breeze
blow through her hair, moving it around like leaves on the street. A
knot had formed in her stomach that she had just become aware of; one
that she only got when she feared the worst would happen. She didn't
get it often, as she usually would go with the flow with out a second
thought, but she had recalled having it the night when she knew she
would never see her father again, the night where she first had to
spend the night on the street alone because she couldn't stand
staying with her mother, and the day that she felt would be her last
but would leave the world with out having righted the most important
relationship with the most important person in her life. Those
situations all managed to work themselves out so she hoped that this
situation would prove to be like the rest. She gripped her hair
within her fingers and brought her forehead down to her knees, taking
deep breaths. She couldn't let herself get so upset over something
that was out of her control. She did what she could; the ball was in
Roger's court now.
"Mimi."
Mimi's head snapped up
when she heard her name and she practically jumped to her feet,
feverishly wiping the tears from her eyes before turning around to
face Roger. She pulled her sweater tight around her. She didn't
speak, but just looked at Roger instead.
"Where are the gifts
I gave you?" She couldn't have thrown them out. She
wouldn't...
The knot in Mimi's stomach just became
gut-wrenchingly tighter. Where were they? She put them outside
the door and then when she came out later, they weren't there. Well
they couldn't have gotten up and walked away. Mimi closed her eyes a
second before slowly allowing them to meet Roger's.
"I don't
know. I put them in a box last night and now they're not there."
"You
don't know?" He took a deep breath. "You didn't throw them
out, did you?"
"No, I didn't throw them out!" Mimi
snapped, which she realized wasn't the best idea. She took a deep
breath before cautiously taking a couple steps toward her boyfriend.
She ran her hands down his arms before taking his hands in hers. "I
would never do that no matter how mad I was at you. Look, they're
around here somewhere. Maureen probably did something with
them."
Although she knew the case was that Mark
probably did something with them, but that wasn't what Roger needed
to hear right now.
"Right..." he said softly. "Maureen
probably picked them up so they wouldn't get thrown out..."
Roger freed one of his hands and once more ran it through his
hair.
"Roger, I wasn't going to throw them out," Mimi
said sternly. "Look. Both of us were mad last night and both of
us did some things that we shouldn't have done. But just because we
had one bad night, I'm not going to throw this all away and
let everything that we've had go to shit. I don't know what you want,
but I don't want to give this up." Mimi looked away from Roger
quickly while pursing her lips before taking her hand from Roger and
sitting down on the vent. "Then again, if you don't trust me and
you don't believe me, I guess there's no point, huh?"
Mimi
shifted her gaze to the streets below, watching people scurrying down
below her.
"Mims..." Roger faded off as he turned away
as well and moved towards the door of his room. He really wanted to
stay together with Mimi. There was nothing he wanted more...
He
sighed, raising his eyes.
The doorways to Roger and Mark's rooms
faced each other and roger could see right into his roommate's room
from his own at the present moment.
That's all he had to say? Mimi
couldn't stand it when Roger was guarded like this. She'd poured her
heart out to him in the living room and didn't get anything, and now
this? Mimi got up off the vent, went down the stairs and climbed
through the window.
"Roger, look I--"
Mimi noticed
him staring at something in Mark's room. She frowned a little and
then took a look for herself. She found her box, complete with Mark's
scarf on the top.
"This isn't what it looks like Roger,"
Mimi said quietly, defeated. Everything just seemed to be getting
worse and worse.
Roger ran out of his room and over to Mark's, his
entire mood changed. That had better not have been what it
appeared to be. Upon entering Mark's room, Roger threw the scarf
aside. A chain of curses followed.
"Roger," Mimi stormed
in after him, her voice pleading. "It's not like I gave the
stuff to him. He just... it..."
Mimi inhaled and exhaled
quickly, not finding the right words to complete her sentences.
"It's not that I wanted to get rid of them. I just... I
couldn't look at them last night because I was so angry and... It's
not what you think, honestly, it isn't."
"I'm sick
of your excuses!" Roger shot, turning quickly on her.
Mimi
was taken aback by Roger's sudden outburst, but stood her ground
regardless.
"What excuses, Roger! I'm not making
any excuses, I'm just telling you the truth!"
"The
truth!" Roger made a sound as if he didn't believe that.
"Yes,
Roger. The Truth. But like I said, if you don't want to
fucking believe me, if you can't trust me after all the shit we've
been through... then I honestly don't think it's even fuckin' worth
it anymore," Mimi said, shaking her head, a disgusted look
coming across her face. "You spend so much more time accusing me
of shit that I'm NOT doing than actually just spending time with me
and enjoying what we have."
"Hey,
what are you do--" He stopped in his sentence. Oh shit. All of
Roger's/Mimi's stuff was still in his room. C'mon, you can't be that
small minded that you would honestly think that meant something. IF
they were cheating, why would Mimi give HIM that stuff?
"Roger,
chill for a minute, will you?" Mark asked, grabbing one of
Roger's wrists as he continued to throw things in his room, to get
Roger to face him. "Before you jump off the handle, I want you
to listen!" He raised his voice so that Roger would actually
hear him. "Listen that stuff isn't what you think it is,
alright? And don't yell at her, it's my fault that this stuff is in
here in the first place."
Rule 1) If you're being accused of
cheating, don't stick up for the other person in front of the angry
ex. It doesn't look so good. But Mark was only trying to ease some of
the tension off of Mimi, and the only way to do that is to shoulder
the blame himself.
And it was at this point that Maureen decided to open her mouth. "Roger, Mark and I put that stuff there. All Mimi did was put it outside of her door." Though she had this strong urge not to get involved in the fight, Maureen felt she had to set the record straight—at least with the box.
Mark was surprised that Maureen had come to his (and Mimi's) aid. He really did half expect her to sit there and not say anything. That was great that she was ready, willing, and able to help. And at this point, they needed all the help they could get.
"See?"
Mimi said furiously. "It doesn't mean anything!"
Mimi
was glad that she finally had Mark and Maureen backing her up. She
needed some other people there for her because her head just was in a
mindless jumble right now. Two seconds ago she wanted to try as hard
as she could to keep everything together, but now she was ready to
throw it all out the window.
"Nothing is going on Roger. All
last night I was in here by myself. Mark and Maureen were out all
night and when they came home, Mark was out looking for you. I saw
him for all of maybe 10 minutes last night after we left and the
entire 10 minutes was focused around how bizarre this all is! Nothing
is going on, no--"
Mimi started coughing again. She grabbed
onto the wall until her knuckles were white, holding herself up with
all her strength. This past night and this new argument weren't doing
wonders for her illness. After a few minutes, it subsided and she
began to take deep breaths.
"Look," she said quietly,
weakly. "I don't know what else to tell you, and I'm not going
to try to be going into these coughing fits. This is the fourth one
I've had in twelve hours and I can't fucking take it anymore. So when
you're ready to act civilized, then you can come and talk to
me."
Mimi turned around, and while gripping at the walls,
made her way out the door and down to her loft.
