Hey guys!

Were back again. Wow the third chapter in 2 days. I can hear you rejoicing from here in Oz! Ok I promise the rest of the story is sooooo much better than these first few chapters. We Marauders have decided that until we get a minimum of 5 more reviews, we will not be posting anymore chapters. We have already written up to chapter 15 but it is up to you guys if you want more. Bring on the reviews.

Lots of Love,

Prongs

Chapter 5

Harry makes his way back to the dormitory.

"Harry" yelled Draco-Moony

Harry, hearing his beloved's voice, quickly swiveled his head in Draco's direction. "Yes Draco my love, I am here for your every beck and call"

"Yes, about that" Draco sneered "I want you to run a little errand for me"

"Oh yes please" Harry said gleefully "Your wish is my command" (Ok open ending here. Sorry I went over the limit but you guys didn't have any better ideas-Prongs)

Later on

Harry lay on his bed, reminiscing what Draco wanted him to do. He would have to do it in secret and tomorrow.

"I need the room of requirements!" he thought.-Padfoot

Suddenly a door appeared. Harry opened it and stepped into Madison Square Gardens.

"Wow" Harry gasped. Now the reason Harry was in Madison Square Gardens was to go get some cheap hookers for Draco's 18th and coming of age party.

"Excuse me" Harry said to a young lady. "Where can I get some good, cheap hookers?"

"Yuk you little perve, go back to pre school!" she screeched at him. Everyone turned around.

"Arry, Arry!" yelled Fleur Delacour.-Moony and Prongs

"What are you doing here?" Harry asked "Where's Bill?"

"I am work-" Fleur stopped mid-sentence "Bill is working"

"Oh…well…do you know where to find cheap hookers? Just between you and me" asked Harry.

Fleur pointed at a woman about 10 metres away.

"That's Courtney. She's really sleazy. Good bye Arry!" she said and ran off.

"That was odd…"-Padfoot

"Hi, ummm Courtney, I'm Harry Pot-"

"I know who you are" Courtney replied "Wanna do it?"

"Excuse me?" asked Harry "Are you sure you want to touch me?"

"Well no, but these are the bad, horrible, disgusting, disturbing parts of my job" Courtney replied.-Moony

"I'm sorry you must be mistaken. I'm here on behalf of my hot friend, you may have heard of him. His name is Draco Malfoy."

"Oh yes I know of Draco, I mean he shouldn't need a hookers with all of those girls fawning over him"-Prongs

"Well Malfoy can't get not at the moment" Harry exclaimed

"Really?" inquired the hooker, Courtney.

"Oh yes, he's quite lonely and pathetic at the moment" Harry stated. "Wallowing in his own misfortunes" Harry laughed as he thought of the loner Malfoy. "And he's not the only one who can't get no!" Harry said, a sense of mystery left hanging in the air at this words.

"Who else?" asked Courtney curiously.

"The Weasley twins, Fred and George" Harry answered dramatically

"Yeah but were they ever able to get some!" Courtney asked.

"No I suppose not" Harry said as he walked off, his hair falling to the side of his angelic face to reveal his handsome and extremely masculine features which allowed his face to seem as if it were carved by an angel.-Wormtail (coughspluttercoughoh how it pains me to type thisgag)(Sorry guys. I know what I have written in 17 lines, but considering I missed out on 3 turns and I also supplied the paper this was written on, I think the length of my insert can be justified. Thanks for your understanding. Love Wormtail)

(Please excuse Padfoot while she pukes all over Wormy's description of Harry Pothead-Padfoot)

(A note from Moony: Wormtail will DIE DIE DIE! It's not cool to attack the innocent ie. The Weasley Twins! Talk about hitting below the belt! Now to attack! Actually I shall let Prongs take it from here. Go for it Prongs, you defend those Weasleys! And Malfoy too! Love Moony)

What Harry didn't know about the Weasley twins was that they had been the ones to seduce all of Harry's past crushes (no, he has never had a real girlfriend) and turn them against Harry, and worship the oh mighty Draco (which isn't too hard once they see Harry's ugly mug!) The twins were Draco's secret agents, working in the castle to get all of the information essential in one's quest for complete world domination.

(TAKE THAT WORMY AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS! Love Prongs)