Chapter Ten: Of Foil Hats

Soundtrack suggestions: "I Want a New Drug" – Huey Lewis and the News, "Catch My Disease" – Ben Lee

"Kaylee! That stuff yer usin' t' wrap Christmas presents, where is it?"

Kaylee looked up. "Over there." She pointed. "What d' ya want with it…?"

"We've got t' make a hat," Jayne said.

"A hat?"

"There's a psychic in Crazy's head, we've got t' block the signal!" Jayne grabbed the roll of gold foil and ran out of the engine room. Confused but interested, Kaylee followed him.

In the infirmary, Simon was still sitting with his back against the wall, his arms around River's waist. His sister had gone limp from exhaustion, and her head was against his shoulder, her eyes open, in obvious pain.

"Got it!" Jayne said to Simon, waving the roll of foil like a baton. The mercenary ripped off a large piece of the foil and began to wrap it into a hat, Kaylee watching him with obvious amusement in her eyes. Once he had crafted something that looked mildly like a cloche (without the rolled brim), he plopped it onto River's head.

"Can you hear me?" Simon asked tentatively.

"Yes."

"Who are we talking to?"

"Who do you think?" she snapped.

"Is it River?"

"What is this, twenty questions?" She sounded irritated.

"Who are we talking to?" Simon repeated, determined not to let the evil medium control his sister any longer than necessary but unsure of who was controlling the brain. Maybe, by putting the foil hat on, they had solidified Charlotte into her brain, leaving the seer no way out.

"Not who you think. The fire is gone, all burnt out. She's running away, faster than fast, trying not to be caught by her shirttails and executed in the center of town."

"Whoa," Kaylee said. Simon gave a half-smile; it was his sister, all right.

"I missed you," he said, and gave her a kiss on the top of her head. She looked at him confusedly.

Mal, Zoë, and Jimena appeared in the doorway. "Did it work?" Mal asked. Jayne nodded. "Good," Mal said. "Now, let's go find this woman and…"

"And what?" Jimena asked, interrupting. "No matter where we track her to, she can probably use her psychic powers against us. I mean, you can't keep that hat on that girl forever."

"Says who?" Jayne demanded.

"I mean, if you want to attend the Snozlund Ball…"

"Ooh, a ball!"

"Hush, Kaylee," Mal said. "Why can't she wear th' hat t' th' ball?"

Jimena held out her hands towards River as though it was obvious. "She looks ridiculous!"

"Then she won't go to the ball," Simon said. "We are keeping your crazy medium out of her head, no matter what it takes. Foil hat or whatever else. I don't think she looks ridiculous at all."

Jimena considered that for a moment. "I think she would stick out."

"River doesn't need to go to a ball," Simon replied, looking firmly at Jimena. "We'll stay here."

"On th' cont'ry, Doc, we're movin' out t' Parker's Playhouse. But ya can stay there."

Jimena had been pursing her lips. "I think there's something else."

"What?" Zoë asked.

"We need to find Charlotte as fast as possible, before she does something worse. Is there any chance we could…?" She looked questioningly at River. Simon, grabbing her meaning, shook his head. "No. No way are you using River to find this woman."

"It may be our only chance, as she seems to be the only one connected to Charlotte at the moment. Our other mediums in the special ops division of the Snozlund Militia can't get a reading on her at all. She is as elusive as smoke."

"You have to let me," River whispered. "She's going to kill them."

Simon looked at her.

She nodded. "Kill many of them. Everywhere. Ice everywhere, dripping onto bodies covered in too much blood, so much blood everywhere."

"It's the only way, Simon," Jimena said gently. "We'll get some of our other psychics here to help her, but if Charlotte is going to kill again, we have to do everything to stop her."

Within an hour and a half, two other psychics, accompanied by Officer Raymond, had arrived at Serenity. One of the psychics, Clarissa, was carrying a map of Snozlund. The other psychic, Bert, had brought a mess of crystals in all sorts of colors and sizes. They met Simon, River, and Jimena in the infirmary.

"This is a good place to do it," Clarissa said, looking strangely at River's hat. Clarissa herself was not older than twenty, with dark blond hair cut chin length, and an angry look about her. "We'll need a place for the reading."

As she spoke, Bert pulled out a large wad of something brown and lit it with a lighter he produced from his pocket. He began to wave the wad around, creating a foul smoke, and chanting in a language Simon didn't recognize. Bert was a moderately tall man with broad shoulders, slightly chubby, with dark curly hair and a ready smile. He wore a red sweater vest with green patterns on it, and looked very festive indeed. When he was finished doing whatever he was doing, he turned to Simon. "Is she ready?"

Simon looked at River, who was lying on the infirmary bed, wearing her foil hat, unconscious. As Jimena had suggested, he had run a tube catheter into a vein in her chest, and connected that to a constant supply of medication that would keep her from going into shock if her heart gave out suddenly, thereby giving them enough time to help her. This, according to Jimena, was entirely probable, and, apparently, had happened many times in her dealings with the special ops division of the Snozlund Militia. "Ready as she'll ever be, I suppose."

"Good. Let's begin," Clarissa said, and lit a thick white candle with Bert's lighter. She closed her eyes and held out her hands. "Great and powerful spirits, we are here to seek your help. We ask in your honorable names that you help us in our quest to find an evil-doer."

Bert rang a small bell. Simon jumped.

"We ask that you help us to find the evil-doer by allowing her into this girl's mind, so that she may speak through this girl."

Bert rang the bell again. Simon jumped again.

"Take her hat off," Clarissa hissed to Simon, her eyes still closed, arms outstretched. He hurried to do so. "Allow the presence of Charlotte Tess DuBois to fill her brain and body, until we can find the evil-doer and stop her in her tracks."

River sat up almost immediately and opened her eyes. The monitor began to shrill a warning, but a quick glance determined that one of her probes had fallen off. Simon stuck it to her chest again. Bert and Clarissa were looking at River anxiously. The girl's eyes were glazed over and it was clear she was not in control any longer.

"Charlotte, where are you?" Clarissa asked. She held up the map of Snozlund for easy access.

River/Charlotte considered that question for a minute. "I don't have to tell you anything."

"Charlotte, where are you?" Clarissa repeated, more fiercely.

River/Charlotte looked at the map, then threw back her head and began to laugh. "You're really off your rocker if you think you can track me! I'm so far away from here; you'll never catch me now!"

"Charlotte, tell us where you are."

Bert took one of his green crystals and made a circle with it around River's head. After he did that, he pulled out another crystal, pink on a thin silver chain, and looped it around her neck. Then he put two silver bracelets on her, one on each wrist, being careful to avoid the bandages on her arms. Then he rang the bell twice. "That should help," he said to Clarissa.

"Charlotte, I'm not going to ask you again."

"Fine, then don't," River/Charlotte said snappishly.

Clarissa looked at Bert for help. Bert shrugged and looked at Simon.

The monitor began to shrill again. Simon looked at it; River's heart was racing. He bit his lips; how much further were they going to go? He wasn't sure how much more River could take.

"The map!" River yelled suddenly, and there was no doubt that it was her speaking, not Charlotte.

Encouraged by this sudden outburst, Clarissa thrust the map at her, holding out a marker. River considered it a moment, then grabbed the marker and drew a small circle around a point on the map. Clarissa took the map and examined it, Bert peering over her shoulder. "Charlotte's in Hays' Market?"

"Is that probable?" Bert asked.

"Only if she wants to be caught."

"What's in Hays' Market?" Simon asked.

"That's where Snodgrass Museum is, home of the Rockport Bones," Clarissa answered. "We can have a team over there within an hour."

"Who's to say she wouldn't already be gone?" Bert asked. "She might know we're on to her. She is a psychic, you know."

"Thanks, Bert, I'd forgotten," Clarissa snapped. Bert hung his head.

"Can we… get the… medium out of her head?" Simon asked, gesturing to her sister. "Before she has a heart attack?"

"Sure, sure, go ahead," Charlotte said dismissively, waving her hand. She and Bert put their heads together, discussing something over the map. Simon put the foil hat back onto River's head and watched as his sister's eyes became a little clearer and her heart slowed. "You with us, mei-mei?"

She nodded. "Arms heavy. Too heavy. Going to fall off."

"Do they hurt?"

She nodded again.

"Okay." He gave her some pain medication through the catheter in her chest. "It'll work in a minute, I promise."

Mal, Jayne, Zoë, and Jimena came back in. "Where is she, Clarissa?" Jimena asked.

"Hays' Market," Clarissa answered, holding up the map to show Jimena.

"Hays' Market," Mal said. "Isn't that where…"

"The Rockport Bones are," Jimena answered for him. "What do you think Charlotte's doing there?"

Bert shrugged. "She could be planning to heist them. Sell them on the black market, make a lot of money, fund her strange and unusual plans."

"That's possible," Jimena conceded. "I guess we should set up surveillance there, catch her in the act."

"Jayne, kin I talk t' ya fer a minute?" Mal asked.

"What fer?" Jayne asked, still looking at Jimena.

"Jayne! Now."

Jayne got the message and followed Mal out into the passage. "What is it, Mal?"

"We have a problem."

"What?"

"Well, in case you didn't notice, Sergeant Flavez is going t' set up surveillance at th' place we need to be stealin' things from."

"What d' ya want me t' do 'bout it?"

"I'm thinkin' you should suggest t' Sergeant Flavez that you two go off 'n do somethin' romantic t'gether, give us time t' get th' bones 'n get out."

Jayne's eyes went wide; it was either from shock or happiness. "What… what d' ya want me t' do with her?"

"What d' ya us'lly do with women? Never mind. Do somethin' nice. I don't care. Don't treat her like a whore, though…"

"Mal! Ya don't have t' tell me." He looked through the windows at where Sergeant Flavez was standing. "She ain't a common whore."

"Kin I count on ya t' take care o' her?"

Jayne nodded solemnly. "Sure thing."

"Good. Now, let's get Zoë 'n go over th' plan again…"