Chapter Six: Back to Reality
Peyton forced herself not to run after her skipping daughter. Instead she helped her son out of the car, a protective arm over her stomach, and followed in a more sedate matter.
Thought swirled through her head, most of them anger at Haley, some of them even anger at Lucas. She even desired that her daughter was mistaken. She knew them well. She knew what drama such a small gesture could bring. She'd lived through it many, many times before.
Peyton set Ben down in front of a Sesame Street video before seeking out Jenny.
"Mom?" asked Jenny in surprise, looking up from the book she was reading, sprawled out on her bed.
"Hey sweetie. I was wondering if I could talk to you," said Peyton, staying stationary at the door even as Jenny motioned her inside.
"About Haley?" prompted Jenny, sitting up and tucking her legs underneath her.
"Yeah. So she was married briefly to Nathan, and then she left very suddenly and sort of never came back so there's a lot of anger around the whole thing," said Peyton.
"I feel like I've seen her before," said Jenny. Peyton sighed inwardly.
"Yeah, you probably have. She's Haley James, she's a famous singer," supplied Peyton.
"Shit, seriously? Wow, that's so awesome. You used to be friends?" asked Jenny eagerly.
"A thousand years ago. So you said they were kissing…" said Peyton, with the distinct air of someone going somewhere they didn't remotely want to see.
"Yeah. And he has his arms around her, but that was just because she was about to fall," explained the girl, her hazel eyes focused on her mother's face.
"So the kiss… was it passionate, or just like a peck?" asked Peyton. Jenny shrugged.
"I don't really know," she said.
"Was there…"
"Tongue?" supplied Jenny. Peyton smiled ruefully at how precautious her daughter was.
"And?"
"Just a little, I think. More like a friendly peck thing," she said.
"But with tongue?" pressed on Peyton.
"Sure, why not. Wouldn't Nathan get really mad?" asked Jenny, her eyes bulging.
"Yes, sweets, that's the idea. Can you do me one last favour and not tell Daddy?"
Jenny's eyes grew wide again at the enormousness of her mother's request. There were many things she kept from her father, but none that she had to keep. They were verging into dangerous territory, and both of them knew it.
"I won't. I promise," she swore. Peyton smiled, kissed her daughters forehead and was out of the room in a flash.
Peyton was halfway down the hall before Jenny had leaned out of her doorway and called after her.
"What is it, Jen?" asked Peyton, sounding strained.
"You're pregnant?" she asked, finally having put together the clues. Peyton's face relaxed into a smile."
"Four months in. Yeah," she said.
"Congratulations. It had better be a girl this time," she said, winking. Peyton winked back and smiled, secretly hoping the same thing.
Peyton jumped slightly, shocked when the pounding of large feet came to her in the kitchen, where she was doing the dishes.
"Wow, you okay?" asked Jake's voice, in response to the shriek she'd made.
"I'm fine," she whispered. His hands landed on her shoulders, and he kissed her neck before his hands moved on to cup her still flat stomach.
"How you feeling?" he asked anxiously. Peyton sometimes loved how much her husband worried.
"I'm great. I told Jenny, or rather she figured it out," she said.
"When you told Luke maybe?" asked Jake, looking so sweetly ignorant.
"Yeah, when we went to pick him up," she said.
"And how's Luke doing? Anything new with him?" asked Jake. Peyton shuddered, glad she was facing away from her husband, that he could not see her dishonest eyes.
"No, but he's good," she said. Jake spun her around so she was facing her and the two kissed. For the first time, Peyton felt guilty of their love, after the first lie to him that had actually mattered in years.
Leaving the two children with their father, Peyton journeyed across town in a taxi to see Brooke, who was scheduled to meet her at her lavish apartment.
"Brooke?" she called experimentally. Brooke appeared, blushing, trailed by a tall dark haired man, who smiled almost apologetically before letting himself out. Peyton smiled and wondered if her best friend would ever change.
"Hey Peyton. What's up?" she asked, immediately noticing the worry lines around her best friend's eyes.
"Everything," she moaned, sitting down beside Brooke and dropping her head into her lap. Stunned, Brooke began to gently stroke her curls in comfort.
"Did something happen with Lucas?" she asked gently.
"No! God no! I went to pick him up at the station with Jenny and Ben, and he wasn't alone," said Peyton, her voice faltering.
"What, he was with a woman? That still bothers you?" asked Brooke, her confusion growing.
"Generally not. When it's Haley James however, and my daughter tells me they were kissing, it's a different matter," said Peyton. Brooke gasped.
"Haley and Lucas? No way! What does that bitch think she's doing?" demanded Brooke.
"Brookie, it was a million years ago," said Peyton, sitting up straight, surprised at her friend's reaction.
"She royally screwed both of them over, and left without a word. She doesn't deserve him, even as a friend," said Brooke passionately.
"It was ten years ago. And who does deserve him? You?" asked Peyton gently. Brooke rolled her eyes and groaned.
"As a boyfriend, he's complete crap. I'm never going back to that. But as a friend, she's even worse. Ten years aren't enough to lessen the pain she caused," said Brooke.
"Is it still pain, or just a memory?" asked Peyton.
"It's empathy. I've known Nathan my whole life, never saw him as bad as that," said Brooke shortly. After that she pressed her lips closed and refused to speak of it.
Peyton knew she only had one more confrontation to make, and also knew that it would be by far the messiest.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" demanded Peyton, much later, as she stormed into Lucas Scott's apartment.
"I'm making coffee," he said in confusion. She glared at him for a moment.
"No, with Haley! You were making out?" asked Peyton.
"No! It was a peck. Between friends. Nothing could stop us from being together on that train, Peyton, even if I wanted it too," said Lucas.
"Bull. You wanted to be with her Luke. And she said it wasn't a peck," said Peyton sadly. Lucas sighed, leaned down, and kissed her lightly.
"There. That's what it was like. Nothing," he said again. Peyton's hand slapped against Lucas' cheek with all her might.
"Would Nathan see it that way? Because that's really what you've got to ask yourself," said Peyton.
"Nathan would kill me if I so much as mentioned her name," said Lucas.
"Yeah, and he'd do worse if he found out. Did you sleep with her?" asked Peyton bluntly.
"No!" said Lucas defensively. Peyton narrowed her brown eyes.
"Keep it that way. Well did you want to?" she asked. Lucas' mouth opened, but no words came out. He struggled for words that would not incriminate him, yet knew that there were none.
"Lucas Scott, she was your brother's wife!" said Peyton, her voice low and fearsome.
"It was once. I walked into the bathroom and she didn't have a shirt on. She's beautiful, and I'm only human," he responded, his jaw tensing.
"You can't do this! You'd seriously open this whole thing up again? You'd do this to him? You'd do this…" Peyton began to tear up. "To us?"
Lucas was unable to resist the urge to take his friend in his arms and rub her back, consoling her gently. Peyton, altered by her pregnancy hormones, gave away to her sadness.
"No. I don't want to hurt anyone. I just liked being her friend again. You don't have to worry about all of us. You worry enough for yourself," he said. Peyton smiled, thinking of the passion that had once been between them, about the friendship that now replaced it, one of the most precious things to her. She smiled about the current moment, cradled in his arms, so sweet, so loving, so completely unromantic.
"I know. I'm just afraid," said Peyton.
"Let her in. She might surprise you," advised Lucas.
"I told Brooke. She was furious," said Peyton.
"Brooke can surprise you. What did Jake say?" he asked, as she stepped away from his embrace and wiped her eyes with a tissue.
"I didn't tell him. I can't," said Peyton. "And don't preach to me, you've never been married."
"Don't think I ever will be," said Lucas, laughing.
"I don't think you will either. But miracles have happened," she ribbed.
"Stop that, you," he said.
"By the way, you need to work on your stealth. Jenny totally figured it out," said Peyton, smiling for the first time.
"Ah well. Do you know yet if it's a girl or a boy?" he asked.
"No. And I don't know if I want to know. Jenny's getting her heart set on a girl," said Peyton, smiling ruefully.
"Well, I guess probability is working in her favour. So do you think you guys'll stop at three?" asked Lucas. Peyton nodded affirmatively.
"Oh, definitely. Two is pretty crazy as it is, and Jenny'll be a teenager soon and I can't deal with all that," said Peyton.
"It'll be a big wakeup call for Ben," he said.
"Yeah, he's so much the baby, but I think he might enjoy the change. I hope I do too," said Peyton.
"I'm sure you will. How could you not?" asked Lucas. Peyton smiled again before apologizing for her outburst and preparing to leave the apartment.
"Just one more thing?" asked Peyton. Luke nodded.
"Can you just… not see her again?" asked Peyton. Lucas stared at her for a long moment before a picture of his brother's hurt face swam into his head.
"Sure. You got it," he said, waving as she left.
Haley sent Alanna home and collapsed onto her sofa, weary yet exhilarated after her long journey. She felt as though she'd journey away from San Fransisco and back to where she'd came from. It was a nice feeling after being lost for so long.
Chris Keller called and she talked to him for a time, explaining about her volunteer work, and listening to an update on his career. By oversight or intention, she failed to mention Lucas. Haley knew that Chris wouldn't see the meeting as platonically as she forced herself to see it.
After she hung up Haley kept the phone in her hand, staring at it. She had again come to a crossroads, but this one only indirectly concerned Nathan, and wholey concerned Lucas. For ten years she'd been able to live without him, but that was before she could let herself remember what his friendship was. She remembered now. So really there was only one option, and no true crossroad.
"Hey," she said into the phone, when it picked up.
"Haley, that you?" asked Lucas.
"Yeah, it's me. What's up?" she asked. Lucas was silent for a moment, thinking of his promise to Peyton to cease communication and his promise to Haley to always be there for her.
Haley waited for him to respond, praying that he hadn't changed his mind, that in his heart he still believed they could be friends.
"Nothing much, what about you?" he asked, as the part of him that wanted Haley back in his life finally won over the part of him that wanted Peyton.