My salsa makes all the pretty girls dance
And want to take off their underpants
My salsa
My salsa
-D12 (featuring Eminem), My Band
Chapter Fifteen: Girl Talk"Get your feet off of my freaking dashboard."
"Jack," Spot started. "Your van is ugly. So, my pretty feet," Spot held up his foot, "will improve the ugly dashboard."
"Will not."
"Will so do."
"That doesn't even make sense!"
Spot stuck his tongue out and stomped his feet on the dashboard. "Aha. Ass."
"Am not," Jack snapped, and ended up taking his foot off of the clutch early and pulling the keys from ignition; of course, the big ugly van stalled. "Damnit!"
"Haha."
"You are such an ass," Jack muttered.
"It's part of my charm."
"I'm picking up Sarah."
"Oh, fuck you."
"She gets shotgun."
"Fuck you BOTH."
"That's what you get for scuffing my dash."
"Your van is ugly," Spot muttered. "And so is your girlfriend, so there."
"Spot, you think all girls are ugly. You're gay."
"At least I'm not in denial."
"I am not in love with David!" Jack half-yelled.
"You brought up David, not me..."
"Shut up," he muttered. "If you say one more word about that with Sarah in the car..." Jack pointed his finger at Spot. "I'm killing you."
"I won't say anything if you let me keep shotgun."
"...FINE."
"HAH."
"But I swear to freaking god..." Jack muttered as he got out of the car and raced towards Sarah and David's house. Spot drummed his fingers along the dashboard as he waited, and soon the couple emerged, Sarah in all of her 'do I look fat? Are you sure?' insecure glory and Jack in all of his 'I don't know! No you don't!' glory as well.
As soon as Jack opened the door for her, Spot said, "Jack is gay with your brother."
"FUCKER."
"Yeah, I know," she agreed.
"SARAH!"
"Well, you kind of are, Jack. Fucking move, Spot, I get shotgun."
"Fuck you."
"Sorry, but I'd rather not get diseased. Didn't you run away or something?"
Spot started to reply, and only stopped when Jack elbowed him hard enough to actually leave him breathless.
"That's gonna bruise, you fucker!" he yelled at Jack instead.
"Move," Jack ordered.
"Fuck you; I'll get a ride with Itey and Dutchy." Spot jumped out of the van and started down the block, waving as he saw his other friend's car approach, and it obligingly stopped to pick him up.
"Spot, Jesus, have you talked to Jack?" Itey demanded as Spot got in. "Tell me you've been home already. Please tell me you've been home."
"I--"
"YOU BIG FUCKER!" Dutchy exclaimed, throwing his arm around Spot, but laughing, so Spot knew he wasn't serious. "God, where the hell did you go? I remember the last time you ran away, we found you downtown in a huge garbage bin. You stunk."
"Seriously--" Itey broke in, but Dutchy kept going.
"Oh oh, and you had this banana peel on your back pocket for like an hour, but we never told you."
Itey rolled his eyes, about to speak, but then Blink saw Spot from half a block down the road from them. "SPOT!"
"How the hell can a guy with one eye have such good fucking vision?" Spot demanded, as Itey pulled over to let Blink in. This was the way they usually rode to school, when Spot rode with them; Itey drove, because it was his car, and Blink was always shotgun, and he and Dutchy would sit in the back and make fun of each other.
"SPOT you ASSHOLE where the hell were you?" Blink demanded.
"Tony's." He paused, while everyone stared at him.
"ITEY, ROAD," Blink finally yelped after a second, and Itey yanked his vision back to where it belonged. "Spot. Talk. Now. Tony's, seriously?"
"Yes, seriously, where did you people think I'd go?" He rolled his eyes.
"I called Sophia at least ten times yesterday," Itey answered. "To find out if you were there, and she never answered her phone."
"You could have called TONY."
"He DID," Blink said. "No answer there, either."
"Must have been in his car," Spot answered. "Got stolen."
"Okay, WHAT?"
Spot smirked for a second, and Dutchy whacked the back of his head. "Talk, fucker," he ordered.
It was a nice change from Jack and Denise, sort of. Because here he didn't have to be so damned sorry, and no one here was going to get all touchy-feeling about anything.
"Jack pissed me off so I left, went to Tony's, we went out to a movie. Got mugged walking back to his car. Spent the day in the hospital and police station and with his family, who were fucking FREAKED. Sophia probably forgot her cell in the craziness. His family is fucking INSANE."
Silence followed and then Itey eeped, "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes I'm sure."
"You could've CALLED us," Blink muttered. "Jesus."
"Why do you care?" Spot snorted.
"Um, because you disappeared without a word?" Itey suggested. "And that's kind of an asshole thing to do?"
"So? I'm an asshole, you know that already."
"Oh, please," Blink answered. "Don't give us that, seriously. You fucking SCARED everyone, you jerk."
"Yeah, right."
"Yeah, that IS right."
Spot rolled his eyes, and Dutchy whapped him upside the head again, this time for real, and it hurt. He turned towards Dutchy to glare, but Dutchy was already glaring at him. "Look," Dutchy said, breaking eye contact after a second because really, no one beat Spot in a glaring contest. "We can only have so many total fuck ups in our group of friends, and I TOTALLY called it with my coke problem, so you just fucking watch it."
Spot stared at him, his brow furrowed in slight confusion. He leaned back in his seat. "What the fuck is this, National Care About Spot Day?"
"Do you promise to stop it?" Itey asked.
"No."
"SPOT."
"What?"
"Please, PLEASE watch out, okay? Because you never let us look out for you, so it's kind of hard to know where you are or how you're doing. IF you won't let us do that, at least promise us you won't go get yourself gang raped or anything."
Another silence followed.
"Mmmm, gang rape."
"BLINK."
"Oh, come on, it had to be said."
"I'm telling Mush you said that."
"He'll laugh."
"He really won't."
Blink shrugged, and turned back to look at Spot. "Seriously, though. We were worried, and Jack was losing his mind. If something had happened to you, he'd have..." He trailed off.
"None of us would have known what to do," Itey finished. "I mean, we just almost lost Dutchy, and the thought of losing you on top of it..."
"Hey, in all fairness, you didn't lose Dutchy," Spot said, smirking. "Because I have the best boyfriend ever."
Dutchy punched his arm. "Not the point, Spot," he said. "Just--we worried about you, okay?"
"We spent six goddamn hours looking for you," Blink griped.
"Why?"
"Because you're our FRIEND, damnit!" Itey snapped. "We CARE about you! Now shut up and--OH MY GOD IT'S EIGHT O CLOCK WE'RE LATE."
Itey jammed on the pedal and the car shot forward through traffic, and was answered by honks and various swears from seemingly innocent old people.
"Settle down, it's just SCHOOL."
"JUST SCHOOL? I'll let you know what's just school--I have to be successful and perfect so Mr. Higgins will keep letting me date Sophia or I'm just SCREWED--"
"He didn't have his coffee," Spot commented.
"Duh," Blink replied.
"Shutupshutupshutup!"
"I'm surprised he was as coherent for as long as he was," Spot noted.
"Well, he was worried about you, dumbass," Dutchy said.
"Aaaaaaaugh!" Itey turned the wheel wildly and they careened into the parking lot.
"Don't feel bad, Itey," Spot laughed as he got out. "Your girlfriend's dad can't get up with no coffee either."
"What?" The mention of Mr. Higgins startled everyone, but especially Itey.
"Yeah; Sophia was making fun of him for it this morning."
"I can't picture ANYONE making fun of him," Blink said. "I can't believe he let you stay the night."
"Me neither." Spot shrugged. "Seriously, the whole family is NUTS. Itey, just wait 'til you meet their cousin Marco--he's at least as overprotective as Tony was."
"Oh, god, not another one."
"And they're WORSE when they're together."
"How is that possible?"
"And--" Spot didn't notice he was babbling. "Maria is fucking annoying she kept trying to get me in trouble and Izzy--"
"Izzy?"
"Isabella, fuck ass," Spot said to Dutchy. "Anyway, Izzy kept defending me and getting Tony and Marco in trouble and it was kind of fun."
Silence followed. The blank, awkward kind, only Spot didn't notice it was awkward.
"Oh, and I saw Sophia in her pajamas."
Itey's eyes almost popped out of his head. "Really?"
"Sure did."
"What do they look like?"
He just started laughing.
"Tell me!" Itey demanded. "I just gave you a fucking ride to school, come on!"
"I'll think about it."
"SPOT!"
"Tell him, or I think his head might explode," Blink said.
"Though that would be kind of fun to watch," Dutchy noted.
"JACK!" Itey yelled towards where Jack was getting out of his car. "Your brother is being MEAN!"
"He does that," Jack yelled back.
"Like when he disappears without calling anyone?" Blink asked snidely, and smacked Spot, who smacked him back.
"Focus, please," Itey snapped. "Spot, pajamas."
"What?" Jack demanded, overhearing as they caught up to him and Sarah.
"Spot saw Sophia in her pajamas and won't TELL me about it!"
"He hasn't had his coffee, has he?" Jack mused. Dutchy shook his head, until Jack blinked and turned to Spot. "Wait, you saw Sophia in her pajamas?" Jack stared, and grinned. "Sweet, what was it LIKE?-OW."
Sarah, who was walking by with her backpack, punched him swiftly on the shoulder. "Aren't you walking me to my locker?"
Jack looked pained. "But Saraaaaahh...."
Sarah glared, twirled on her heel, and stormed off. Jack rolled his eyes. "We got in a fight on the ride here. Spot, you're too mean to her."
"Boohoo."
"Yeah, that's what I said. So she's mad. But that means" Jack rubbed his hands together. "Plenty of make up time coming up."
"Ew. Girls," Blink said bluntly.
"PAJAMAS. TELLING. NOW."
"Itey, get LAID."
"He's TRYING."
"Yeah, but he ain't gonna succeed." Spot grinned and Itey looked ready to murder him. Which was fairly amusing, because it was Itey, who always looked so pleasant. "Trust me, between Tony and Marco and her dad, you're never gonna score."
"I am not TRYING to SCORE, I am trying to DATE her! And TELL ME NOW or I'll HURT YOU."
"I'd like to see you try."
"Sp-OT, tell meeEEEEEE."
"You're gonna make his day hellish, aren't you?" Dutchy asked. Spot nodded, and Dutchy started laughing. "You're mean."
"Yeah."
"SPOT!"
"I think it's worth it, though," he continued.
"SPOOOOOOOOOOT."
"He's going to be really annoying about this all day, isn't he?" Blink asked.
"That's my plan."
"But SPOT, I spent SIX HOURS searching for you yesterday! Come on..." Itey pouted.
Spot sighed. Okay; maybe Itey did deserve it. "She was pretty cute. For a girl," he said finally.
Dutchy made an impressed whistle, and Blink folded his arms and made fake commentary. "You hear that, Frank? For a girl, he says!"
"I did hear, Robbie."
"But will he tell us the attire the lovely young woman was IN?"
"We'll just have to wait and see, Robbie."
"Come on, was she half naked or not?" Jack broke in, and Itey smacked his shoulder. Hard.
"She was wearing huge pajama bottoms with ducks on them."
"....."
"....."
"And a hoodie. A big one."
"...That's so cute!" Itey gushed.
"And the ducks had different facial expressions."
"Um, why the hell did you notice that?" Jack demanded.
"Marco pointed it out, right before Izzy threw her oatmeal at him." He shrugged. "Like I said, the whole family is nuts."
"So cuuuuuuute."
"I think you broke Itey," Dutchy said.
"On the other hand, Tony sleeps in his boxers," Spot continued, and grinned.
"Really," Dutchy murmured. "Yeah, that would be kinda hot. He's pretty built."
Blink nodded his agreement, and Jack shook his head a little. "I just don't get it," he said. "I just DON'T."
"You'd like to see Davey in his boxers."
"I have, and funny how it didn't do anything for me, because I'm STRAIGHT."
"You so aren't." Pause. "And when the hell did you see that?"
"Because we were having a sleepover!"
Spot seemed to working something out in his head, then, "Wait, doesn't he sleep in your room when you have sleepovers?"
"Yeah. So?"
"And he's only in boxers."
"So what?"
Spot smirked and then all of the others (minus Itey, who was still suffering from serious Sophia addiction) hid their smiles and started walking towards the school without a word.
"What?" Jack asked, trailing after them. "No, seriously, what? What is it?"
"Nothing."
"No, come on Spot, tell me!"
"Forget it, Jack." Blink threw an arm around Jack's shoulder. "Just go to your happy place."
"And we all know where that is!" Dutchy snickered.
Spot broke in with, "In his room."
"With David."
"In boxers," Blink added.
"Shut UP, it's perfectly NORMAL for guys to see each other in their underwear!" Jack insisted. Loudly. And at that precise moment a few of Sarah's cheerleader friends were walking by. They all eyed each other, and scampered off giggling.
"Great, now the whole school will know and Sarah's gonna be mad at me."
"I bet Davey can make it better."
"SHUT UP."
"Hey, hey Spot?" Itey asked, coming up next to him. "What was her hair like?"
"...are you for real?"
"Just tell me!"
"You make me sick."
"Come ooonnn..."
"Go away!"
"Spoooooooooot."
"The idea was for me to annoy you, not the other way around!"
"Dude, that totally backfired."
"Shut up, Dutchy."
"Spot!"
He sighed. "Back in a braid. Kinda messed up; I think she slept with it that way and hadn't brushed it yet. Happy?"
Itey sighed happily. "She is so wonderful. She braids her hair at night!"
"Which makes her wonderful... how?" Blink asked. "Is that some kinda straight guy thing I don't get?"
"No. I don't get it, either," Jack said.
"And I point out again, you are NOT straight."
Jack shoved Spot without breaking stride; Spot caught himself and shoved back.
"Careful; his boyfriend'll kick your ass," Blink warned.
"I could so take David."
"David and I are! not! dating!"
They were cut off when the bell rang, and with that, Itey said goodbye to all of them and rushed off, before tripping over some guy's foot and flying to the floor. Dutchy sighed, shook his head, and walked slowly over to help him up while Jack, Spot and Blink continued the other way to get to class. Blink and Spot somehow had the exact same schedule, which almost never happened. Probably it was because they were both taking remedials for half of their classes.
"Study Hall," Blink supplied, and Spot groaned.
"Better than MATH," Jack spat, and shuddered. "I'm so failing. I'm off. Have fun."
"Not as much fun as you and Davey have on your sleepovers, I'm sure."
"Fuck YOUUUU."
Blink and Spot had to laugh as they continued down the hall, slowly, to class. Blink, though he hid it well, was just as unmotivated as Spot was.
"So, you really okay?" Blink asked. "They didn't break any of your little ribs?"
"Nah. The gang rape thing? So happened."
"Really?"
"I just wish."
"You WOULD, ya sicko." They settled in at their desks, and the homeroom teacher walked over.
"Mr. Conlon, I trust you have an excuse for yesterday?"
"Don't I always?"
"I mean a written one, Mr. Conlon."
"Well, that's different."
The teacher sighed. "Sean; this makes six absences in the past month, two of which were already unexplained and unexcused..."
Spot rolled his eyes. "I got mugged; wanna see the bruises for proof?"
"No, I want you to give me a written excuse from class from your parents, just like everyone else."
Spot narrowed his eyes but didn't correct him; he hated it when people assumed he lived with his parents. But he didn't hate it quite as much as he hated explaining he was a foster kid, so he didn't say anything.
"Sean?" the teacher demanded.
"I'll have it tomorrow."
"See that you do."
"So..." Blink mumbled as the teacher walked off. "You spent the night at Tony's?"
"Yeah...but I couldn't stay in his room. I swear to God his dad is onto us."
Blink nodded and Spot stared him down. "What?" Blink asked, laughing slightly.
"Since we're on the whole 'staying the night' thing, how far have you two gone?"
"Huh?"
"You and Mush, stupid."
"I know who you meant! I just..." Blink fiddled with his hands. "How far have you and Tony gone?"
"I asked you first."
"Screw you!"
"More like 'screw Mush'?" Spot pried.
"Well..."
"Have you?" Spot asked seriously, drawing doodles on his desk in permanent pen.
"...Sorta?" Blink asked. "I mean... Y'know, we have but not... really..."
"Right." Spot nodded. "Blow job."
"Yeah."
"Is he any good?"
"He's fucking amazing."
"I can't believe we're talking about this. We're gossiping like girls."
"Yeah, but you still have to tell me about you and Tony," Blink said. "'Cause I told you."
Spot shrugged.
"Come on. Tell me."
Spot wondered if anyone was listening in while he was in school, but figured he'd already said enough incriminating things that if someone was, he was caught; if not, it didn't matter. "Not that far," he said finally.
"Awwwwww."
"Shut up." He punched Blink in the shoulder. "So, are you two planning to...?"
Blink nodded, blushing a little. Spot laughed, and Blink punched him again. He was getting hit almost as often as people were trying to comfort him today.
"You two?" Blink asked.
Spot shrugged. "One step at a time," he said.
Blink nodded. "Well, good luck."
And Spot asked curiously, unable to stop himself, "Hey, does Mush still have a thing for Tony?" Blink stared out the window for a second. Spot poked him in the ribs. "Does he?"
"...Yeah," Blink said eventually. "But it's not a big deal."
Spot snorted, and flopped back in his seat. "What's that mean? Come on, I mean, it doesn't really bother me, but how the hell are you supposed to feel?"
"Spot, come on." Blink shrugged. "Tony was like, the whole first love thing. And the fact that you two suddenly became a couple when Mush was trying to convince himself that the only reason Tony never liked him was because he was straight...well..." Blink started adding to the inappropriately sexual doodle Spot had started on his desk. It was their thing. "He kind of took it personally."
"Blah blah blaaah." Spot made his right hand flop open and shut, making an unflattering imitation of Blink's speech as he added more...volume to the drawing and Blink waited to add the horns. "Okay, so we know how MUSH feels, how the fuck do YOU feel?"
"How do you feel?"
"I asked you first, ass."
"You have to tell me after."
"You didn't have these blow jobs anywhere I was, did you?"
Blink paused. "Wha--?"
"Never mind, tell me the other thing first."
"What...other..."
"The Mush liking Tony thing!"
Blink hesitated. "It kind of sucks. I mean... I know he does care about me, and hey, he's with me and not Tony so I shouldn't... It shouldn't bother me. And I know that if you two broke up and Tony asked him, he'd say no, because he does like me more, but... You know, it sucks, because I don't get to be his first love." He paused. "But seriously, he also knows he and Tony would be TERRIBLE together."
"They would," Spot agreed.
"So?" Blink demanded. "How do YOU feel about it?"
He shrugged and doodled some more. Blink stole the pen out of his hand.
"Fine," Spot mumbled.
"Ahahaa, no. I spilled. You spill."
"We are so gay."
Blink smirked. "Come on, tell me."
He turned his back slightly, letting it crack, and grinning at Blink's wince. "My boyfriend's hot, what can I say?"
"...and?"
"And it's not GREAT, but he kissed ME first, so I'm sliding on that." He grabbed the pen back. "This needs to be bigger."
"Lay off on the spikes," Blink mentioned casually, then got back to the conversation at hand. "So...how serious are you?"
"What's that mean?"
"You know."
"I jerked him off in the bathroom, if that's what you mean."
"No." Blink paused, then wretched. "Oh GOD no."
Spot grinned. "It's funny because Tony moans so much that he had to bite into the towels."
"I so did NOT ask that."
"You did, earlier."
"I didn't want DETAILS."
"You so did."
"Shut up, gross." He shuddered. "I meant, like... I mean, are you two just in it for the sex? Or hand jobs, or whatever it is you're doing?--DON'T tell me!--or do you two... Like each other?"
Spot smirked. "The world may never know. And I like the spikes. And you so want to know, because Tony's and my sex is way hotter than yours and Mush's."
"It is NOT."
"It SO is."
"Shut UP."
"All you got on me is a blow job. And I'm this close."
"SPOT."
"What?"
"Do you really, really like him, or is this just another one of your sex things? Because Tony's our drummer, and if you break up, it'd be super weird and you'd be a super bitch and so would he. SO..."
Spot poked Blink's eyepatch with the pen and then finished up their dirty doodle. Blink swore and punched him as Spot laughed. Then he stopped, because Blink had punched his shoulder, which was technically where he'd been hurt when they were 'mugged'.
"Ouch! Shit, that hurt!" Spot snapped.
Blink paused. "What? What'd I do?"
"That's where they freaking twisted my arm, ass." Spot loved lying. Maybe that was the good outcome of all this.
"God, sorry!" Blink patted his arm oddly. "Really, though, the biggest loss is the car."
"I know." Spot pretend rolled his arm around slightly. He deserved an Oscar. "Yeah, but we won't be breaking up any time soon, so don't worry about it."
Blink grinned. "Awww, Spotty's in wuuuuuuuuuuv."
"Shut up," Spot snapped, which he was aware was not a denial. Because he was in wuuuuuv. Well, love.
"Oh, and it wasn't just a blowjob, so long as we're competing," Blink added.
"We're competing?" Spot asked, then laughed. "God, we so are."
"Yeah. Man, if Dutchy had a boyfriend, things would be really interesting."
"Or if Jack and David admitted they're both gay?"
Blink paused. "You really think they are?" he asked.
"YES."
"Yeah, me too. Just checking."
"And Dave would be so much better than Sarah. I like David."
"Don't tell Tony that."
Spot punched him.
Blink was observing their drawing, and nodded in satisfaction as he gave it a title. "'Marcus The Rampant Greek Man'."
Spot burst out laughing and Blink scribbled out Marcus's name above the doodle. "So...come on, give me a lowdown."
"What?" Spot asked, still laughing. "What are you talking about?"
"SILENCE!" The teacher called from her desk. "Mr. Conlon!...Mr. Conlon's friend!"
"I'm touched, I've only gone to this school two years longer than you have," Blink muttered, then went back to the topic. "Mushee, for instance, when he's all riled up and ready to let go, he punches me."
"...isn't that called 'sadism'?"
"NO! NO no, he just gets his fists all balled up and kind of punches things. It sounds weird, but it's not." Blink shrugged and bit into the pen lid. "You?"
"Uhhhh." He paused. "Me? Or Tony?"
"Tony, ew. God, I don't want to know what you do."
"You so want me."
"In your dreams, Spot."
"You so do."
"Whatever. Come on, juicy details. You're my only gay friend who's currently actually scoring."
"Poooor Dutchy. When was the last time....?"
"Other than... Whatever you two did that I don't want to know about? Three months ago, with a girl."
"Ouch."
"Yeah, well, he seems to like them. I don't get it. So details."
"You've got a one track mind."
"Sure do."
Spot shrugged. "I mentioned he needed to bite a washcloth, right? The guy is loud."
Blink grinned. "How loud?"
"How about how not loud." Spot leaned forward, lowering his voice; people were starting to stare at them, but Spot was sure it was because of how loudly he'd been laughing before. Besides, the whole school knew he was gay. "I don't even think he knows he does it, but he fucking starts murmuring in Italian all over the freaking place, and then the moans start and the only way to get him to shut up is to stop or smother him."
"...I'm assuming you--"
"I don't do either." Spot observed Marcus and added some dialogue to his shirt 'Fuck You'. "Look, Marcus has my shirt. He spent the night."
Blink bit back a snort and checked to make sure the teacher wasn't watching. "So, he talks in Italian on purpose."
"Sometimes to turn me on and sometimes he doesn't even know he's doing it." Spot grinned. "What else does Mushee do, eh? I keep picturing him as the innocent little school boy, with his erotic little uniform that he doesn't know looks hot on him."
"Don't check out my boy."
"Everyone does." Spot nudged him. "If you fucking tell anyone I was giggling about this with you, you're dead."
"Back at you!" Blink snapped. Then blushed.
"So?" Spot demanded.
"Mush and I work out together," Blink said finally.
"That's really gay."
"That's the point."
Spot shrugged. It probably was the point. "So? Spill."
"Public gym." Blink coughed. "Public gym."
"Oh shit, you mean the two of you--in public?!"
"Well, we got to the bathroom first," Blink said. "It was hard, though, 'cause damn we were, uh..." He trailed off. "Ready to go," he finished lamely.
"Who knew lifting weights could be so erotic?" Spot laughed and began to give Marcus a barbell, because making Blink blush was always fun.
"We did. That was the point. I'd bet him he'd want to jump me and..."
"Won?"
"Lost." He sighed. "Other way around; he gets really focused when he works out."
"So you dragged him to the nearest bathroom stall."
"...And then the shower."
"That is gross."
"He was afraid we'd get caught and he'd lose his club membership. But I'm just saying, you and Tony should try working out together sometime, if you're that desperate for action."
"Aha, yeah, me, working out." Spot coughed. "Note my enthusiasm. I'd die. He's like the freaking Hulk only short and not bulky."
"Oh GOD, Marcus doesn't need--"
"Oh yes he does."
"Okay okay, so anyway. If you'd believe it or not, the second time he...well yeah, worked his magic on--"
"On Little Blinkee?"
"GOD." Spot started laughing again. "So the second time was in a stall. And it was hot because he was hurrying it up and being really really rough because he was scared we'd get caught any second."
"Mush?" Spot snorted. "Rough, right, I'll add that to my list of bullshit. Right under me working out."
"He didn't do it on purpose though, so it worked." Blink grabbed the pen and added a Chef's hat to Marcus. "By the way, Tony cooking? Hot."
"Get yer own pen," Spot snapped, grabbing his back. Blink did so, searching through his pockets. "I know, he's a fucking god."
"Now, tell me more."
"Ya know, I kinda gotta wonder who has this desk after me," Spot noted, as Blink produced a pen.
"C'mon; more. We've got, like, half an hour still."
Spot shrugged a little. "What do you want to know?" he asked.
Blink paused, then grinned. "How big is he?" he asked.
"What? Oh you are fucking KIDDING me," Spot yelped, and then looked up to see everyone was staring at him. "That is so not--I didn't measure, God."
"...but?" Blink asked.
"Let's just say he's built there, too."
Blink laughed and began adding details to Spot's artwork.
"What about Mush?"
Blink stopped drawing and smiled lustfully, with a slight daze added to the grin.
"Ah...somehow I'm not surprised. Mush is hot. Very hot. He deserves a TV show. And it'll just be about how hot he is."
"Don't I know it." Blink went back to Marcus. "But god, yeah...he's doing well in that department. Oh oh." Blink grinned. "Guess where he blew me once?"
"This is getting far too fucking casual."
"Shut up, guess where?"
"...the garden?"
"At work!" Blink grinned. "He was signing out and I came to pick him up and we went to the washroom. We were so proud of ourselves."
Spot laughed. "Man, I need a fuckin' job."
"...To have sex at?"
"No, because I'm broke. I mean, I'm dating Tony and I feel kinda... Guilty, ya know? 'Cause he pays for everything."
"Well, he can afford to."
"Still, though. It just sucks."
"Hey, cheer up. You've got a sugar daddy."
"So do you."
"Yeah, but Mush's family is less obscenely wealthy. I get the feeling Tony's family is pretty, uh..."
"Yeah, they are. Man, you should see their fucking DVD collection, it's like a video store."
"Tony's gotta have a great CD collection," Blink noted.
"Fuck me, I never even checked that!" He paused. "He gave me a handjob in the backseat of his car, I'm gonna fucking miss that thing if they don't find it."
Blink looked like he was about to choke. "WHAT was that about this being too casual?!"
"Well, you seemed interested."
"Yeah, but--damn, that car was hot."
"I fucking know it."
Blink laughed. "The backseat of Mush's car is really uncomfortable."
"You'd know?"
"Hell yeah." He grinned. "That's why we haven't done it YET, either his folks are home or my dad is home, and the backseat needed to be vacuumed and anyway, when you get sweaty you stick to the leather."
"The downside of dating rich guys with nice cars," Spot agreed, and put what he thought would be a finishing touch on Marcus.
"Yeah--but Dad's gonna be gone this weekend for a high school reunion, SO..." Blink grinned. "You're gonna have some catching up to do."
"Yeah? Well, one of the two of us here is a virgin right now and it sure ain't me."
Blink poked him with his pen, leaving a nice stripe down his arm. "Yeah, you and Jessica, I can not BELIEVE... Man, you got your ass kicked for that."
"It was worth it."
"Was she... good?"
"Ew, no. Gross, she's a girl. But there was this guy in my last school..." He shrugged. "That was way better."
"You've had sex with a guy before?"
Spot shrugged again.
"Wow...well, how was it? Did it hurt?"
"I was doing all the work."
"Oh."
"So no; it rocked. But he dumped me two days later. 'Yeah, Sean? I'm not gay, I'm sorry.'"
Blink whistled. "Ultimate rejection..."
"Tell me about it."
"When you and Jessica had sex, did you actually...you know, or did you fake it?"
Spot snorted, and scuffed the back of Blink's head. "OW."
"I NEVER fake it," Spot said proudly. "I had sex with Jessica Craig and she fucking came twice."
"Did not."
"No, serious."
"Really?"
"I had to pretend she was someone else though." Spot made a grossed out noise. "God, gross...think of Tonyyyyy."
Blink laughed. "So, what, all he does is moan loud and whisper in Italian? What else does he do?"
"Haven't you had enough?"
"Don't you want to get your mind off of sex with a girl?"
Spot nodded, and then starting coloring the rubber bottoms of his sneakers. "He arches his back a lot...and he has like, the worst fucking restraint ever. It's hilarious. I could touch him and he'd go nuts. He's been suffering from denial for way to long and I'm just too fucking hot. We need to find a place to fuck."
"Why not his house?"
Spot snorted.
"Oh...never empty."
"EVER." In a matter of speaking...
Blink thought. "Uuuh...his car...oh wait, no, sorry. Must bring back painful memories. Well, of the car being stolen, not the events IN the car."
"Those were hot," Spot supplied, writing in 'Spot is fucking hot!' on his shoe. "Look, self-promotion!" He stuck his leg out.
"Gimme, I want some." Blink grabbed the pen.
"Use your own!"
"It ran out..."
"Now you know how Mush feels."
Blink thought about that for a second, then kicked Spot's leg. "ASS." Spot was laughing. "That was such a good fucking burn!"
"I know!"
"God, we're the gayest people ever. I like how study hall is Super Gay Gossip Hour."
"Yeah; it's fun. We need to get Dutchy in on this. I wanna hear about him whoring himself out for coke."
"You would."
"I do." Spot waited impatiently while Blink began drawing on his own shoe. "Copy cat."
"So tell me more."
"YOUR turn," Spot objected. "I just told you about the control thing."
"God, when you go down on him you know he's gonna lose it in--" he stopped. "Nope, too dirty for study hall. He so is, though, if he's got such," he smirked, "bad restraint."
Spot punched him. Hard. "Pervert."
"I'm so right!"
"Give me my fucking pen back!" He snatched the pen away from Blink and began to draw a spider web in another corner of his desk. "And talk. It's so your turn."
"Ught. Well, I met Mush's mom, finally."
"Yeah?"
"Ooooh yeah. She kept trying to set me up with his cousin, like, 'PLEASE be straight, Ryan, please, god, let you NOT be his boyfriend!' And finally he was just like, 'Mom, Ryan is gay. Like me, remember?'"
"...And?" Spot asked.
"She ran out of the room."
"Are you SERIOUS?"
"Yep. God, Mush looked like he wanted to DIE, I felt so bad for him."
"Jesus...no kidding."
"Yeah, it wasn't good. They're nice enough about it I guess, they just pretend he's Mr. Perfect. Which he is, but they think gayness isn't perfect." Blink shrugged.
"Welcome to our world!" Spot announced. "Ding ding. Izzy is cool about it though; she's always trying to find ways for us to be alone together without being caught."
"I just suggest washrooms." Blink shrugged. "Serious, because who can see you in a washroom? No one."
Spot thought about that, and realized it worked for this case as well; really, he doubted the mob watched bathrooms. Or maybe they did, but not the INSIDE.
"I want Tony right now," Spot groaned. "Serious."
"Mush also gasps a lot," Blink added. "Little sharp ones, it's so cute and hot at the same time."
"The problem with washrooms is that you'd have to go in together," Spot mused, mostly to himself. "People would notice that."
"Nah; we're gay. People forget that we aren't actually women, so going to the bathroom in pairs is fine."
"It's really not." Because the mafia would notice that.
"Suit yourself, I'm just sayin'. Hey; they've got a day off school next week for conferences or something, I'm dragging Mush here with me. Totally having sex in the bathroom."
"Gross." Pause. "So he gasps?"
"Oh yeah. What else about Tony?"
"Jesus, we haven't been together all that long, we..." He paused. "He's got REALLY nice arms from all the drumming. Damn."
"Awwww."
"Shut up, he does."
"I know, it's just cute, 'cause you're... You, you hate everything, but suddenly there's Tony and you're noticing things like his hot arms and find cooking a turn on. It's so... Not you."
"I don't hate everything, Blink," Spot said softly.
Blink glanced up at him from his shoe, an eyebrow raised. "What'd...what'd you say?"
"Nothing, forget it."
"No, wait, I totally just said something asshole-ish and didn't notice." He squeezed Spot's arm. "...sorry?"
Spot, not wanting to, had once again shown more of his 'pussy self' which he had labeled the way he'd acted around Jack that morning. Really, he liked his pussy self a lot better than his regular self, but he wasn't about to admit that.
"Nah." Spot shrugged, finishing up his shoe and starting on the other with the new pen he'd found. "I don't though."
"Well, you don't--"
"Always act like it. I know. I never act like it. Tony scratched me." Spot pulled the shoulder of his t-shirt down a bit, showing off a red mark. "See?"
Blink observed. "I always pictured you as the rough type."
"Out of the two of us, I so am. I bite him all the time."
"Hence your nickname."
"Abso-fucking-lutely." He grinned. "He likes it, though. He just doesn't want to admit it."
Blink paused. "Seriously; I know you're not as much of an asshole as you act like."
"Yeah, whatever."
"Don't whatever me; if you can tell me the intimate details of your sex life, you can talk to me. You and Jack got into a fight, or what?"
"Yeah, but look--look, I already had to go through the stupid fucking emotional apology once today, and it's only eight thirty, I'm fucking not doing it again." He paused. "I bite; Tony licks."
"Ooh, hot."
"Damn right." Spot looked at Blink again, rolled his eyes, and gave Blink's knee a slight, friendly grab. "Okay okay, I can talk to you, Jack was being a dick. End of story?"
Blink winked. "End of story. So, when we talk BITE, how much exactly do you bite, as opposed to just suck?"
"Oh, I bite."
"And he?"
"Moans loud, talks in Italian, licks me and arches his back." He paused, thought, and added, "And has nice arms. Soon as this period is done, I'm gonna go jerk off in the bathroom."
"Skip math?"
"Gee; which is better, math or masturbation?"
"Dude, would it be creepy if I was jerking off in the stall next to you?"
"Yes."
"Damn." Blink laughed. "You're gonna need to copy my notes again, huh?"
"Your notes are totally illegible anyway, not like it'll do me any good."
"Fuck you, I was offering to be nice!"
Spot said nothing, just began to absently add a collar and leash to Marcus's getup, which made Blink laugh again.
"Who's holding the leash?" he asked.
"Haven't decided yet." But Spot didn't get a chance to, because the bell rang, and he knew that the drawing would have been totally erased by the next day. "I'm off to go have fun."
"Fuck you," Blink answered, and smacked the back of his head.
Spot started towards the washrooms, seriously, and Blink had to hand it to him; he didn't think ANYONE planned on jerking off in a school washroom. But this was Spot. Spot did lots of things.
Unfortunately, Itey was walking by them and gasped as he saw Spot walking off.
"SPOT. You have CLASS. If you fail you're screwed!" Itey grabbed Spot by the earlobe. "I had to torture myself teaching you ALL the material of Linear Equations last month, in one night, so I'm not doing it again."
"Whine whine," Spot griped. "Go get laid and leave me alone."
"Yeah, you'll be saying that when you need help in math again." Itey shoved him at Blink. "Make sure he doesn't wander off, Blinkee." Then Itey went into his class.
Blink burst out laughing and Spot punched him, but it was an affectionate punch. It was weird; he'd never thought about it before, but he did like Blink. They hung out, they failed classes together, they fucked around in study hall, and talked about things he couldn't discuss with Jack because... Jack was great, but not so much into talking about boys. Because Jack liked girls.
Spot still didn't understand that, and had to remind himself that technically, he was in a minority.
He could talk to Jack about almost anything else, though. He'd proved that to himself that morning already, and Jack... Really was like a brother to him. Which was just weird, because he'd had five or six foster brothers before, and he'd hated them all. But he cared about Jack.
And... It was so odd to think about, he realized as Blink dragged him into the room. The math teacher raised an eyebrow, and looked kind of confused, as they'd never both showed up on time before. He ignored it and went back to his thoughts.
The first weekend he'd been at Denise's, only a week after he'd met Jack's friends, he and Dutchy had gotten totally drunk together. And screwed around, which was actually how he'd gotten his nickname--nothing came from it, of course, but he and Dutchy could hang out and party and it was fun.
And Itey and David... Well, they were serious, but they cared about him, didn't they? Itey had stayed up until 3 AM drilling the last algebra unit into his head, and he'd had no reason to. He'd volunteered. Itey was nice like that. Like David, who nearly lived at Denise's house, and was a great guy. Because, if nothing else, he liked to make fun of Jack. They got along.
Weird. He actually liked people. He hadn't even realized. And weirder... They could, conceivably, almost like him back.
Except he was an asshole, so he was probably just deluding himself. He sighed and put his head down on his desk.
Blink prodded his head with the eraser on his pencil. "Uh...what, did you just let it go in your pants? Because you look kind of worn out."
Spot snickered, not lifting his head. "We are so fucking gross."
"Did you do the homework?" Blink asked, looking through his backpack and pulling out a juice box, offering one to Spot. Spot shook his head. "Dude, you need some--"
"Meat on my bones? I hear that every day." Spot stretched. "Tony force feeds me."
"Good thing!"
The teacher, a tall, thin man by the name of Mr. Larrison, was approaching their desk then, looking seriously at the both of them. Blink nudged Spot, and Spot shrugged. "Who cares, we weren't doing anything wrong."
However, they still shut their traps when the teacher stopped in front of their desk.
"Hi sir." Blink grinned. Mr. Larrison ignored him.
"Mr. Conlon," he said. "Come to my desk."
Spot rolled his eyes and pulled himself lazily up from his seat to follow Mr. Larrison to his desk. Blink gave his back a supporting pat as he did so, and Spot really hoped he didn't have to hear shit about being absent.
"What'd I do?" Spot asked, his tone moody and defensive. Mr. Larrison didn't reply a moment, he just was shuffling through his drawer. When he finished, he pulled out a few sheets of scrap paper.
With Spot's handwriting.
"Did you write these?"
Spot stared. "What?"
"These stories..." Mr. Larrison slapped them down on the desk. "Sean, did you write these?"
"...I guess...they might be mine. I dunno."
"They're good, Sean."
Spot stared at him. "They're... What?"
"Good."
Spot waited for the other shoe to drop. Because math teachers frowned on it when, instead of taking notes in class, students wrote random pieces of fiction. Regardless of the quality. So Spot just stood there for a second.
The other shoe dropped.
"I've given them to Mrs. Abrams for the school literary magazine, but I wanted to be sure I knew whose they were."
"What?" Spot asked. He hadn't stopped staring yet; he was sort of in shock.
"They're quite good. I didn't realize you wrote, but you're certainly better at it than you are at math."
Also, math teachers didn't make jokes. He wondered what alternate universe he'd wandered into for the past couple of days... And then he realized what the teacher had said.
"You gave them to the literary magazine?!"
"Yes, I--"
Spot groaned and shook his head. "Larrison, Jesus Christ, it isn't going to be freaking IN IT, right? Not unless I want it to be."
There was a pause.
Spot swore.
"Sean, I'll have none of that language."
"I didn't say you could submit them to any pussy magazine, Larrison, because it's all crap anyway and even if it wasn't why the hell would--"
"Sean, you're average is 60. 60 percent. That is a HORRIBLE average."
"So?"
"So not only does your writing deserve to be read, it'd look pretty nice on your resume."
Well, that was a low blow. And, unfortunately, true. But, "So? It ain't like I'm going to college."
"Resumes help with jobs, too, Sean. Which you'll definitely need if you don't go to college." He raised an eyebrow again. "Especially if you hope to go into writing, you'll want to get these published. And I suspect that's what you want to do."
"Fucking is not."
"Mmmhmm." He sounded far too smug. "Why don't you take your seat again and think about it? You have Mrs. Abrams for English this afternoon, correct?" He nodded. "Good. Think about it until then, she'll ask you about it."
Spot nodded again, wanting to get out of that conversation as quickly as possible. Because really, he couldn't believe he'd been stupid enough to leave those papers around in the math room, and there was no one anyone would actually LIKE that crap, except maybe Tony, who had probably been lying to make him feel better.
He sat back down, and Blink poked his shoulder. "OW, fucker," Spot snapped, not hurt but reacting to his alleged mugging.
"Sorry," Blink answered. "So what the hell was that?"
Spot shrugged. "Just crap about me needing to get good grades for college and shit. You know, 'you have no future' and all that shit."
"I got one of those." Blink nodded. "From Mushee, only nicer. He says I can amount to more. But I figure I only want to sing, so..." He gave Spot a grin. "So do you wanna be a writer?"
Spot paled. "What?"
"You always scribble and stuff in notebooks when we're rehearsing and you're just sitting there, so..." Blink shrugged. "Or hey, maybe you could be a model."
"That's stupid."
"No no, pout. Serious, you can pout so good. Hey hey, Mr. Larrison, can Spot pout or can't he!?"
"Indeed." The math teacher gave them a bemused look.
"Leave me alone!"
Blink grinned his stupid, annoying smile, which was about three times too large for his face, and the second bell rang, so Mr. Larrison started class. Which Spot spent the period actively ignoring; specifically, since Larrison had decided to try and foster his creative side, he spent the period finally getting the writing he'd craved doing out of his system. The words flowed and not even getting called on in class interrupted him; he answered with his middle finger, which by this point, he didn't even get sent to the office for.
During the first two weeks he'd been in school, he'd spent more time in the office than in class. Then the school social worker had told them a bunch of shit about how he was a 'special case' who needed 'extra patience and consideration,' and as close as he could tell, it meant that he could do whatever he wanted. No one bothered him. He was a screw up anyway; it wasn't like failing a year of high school before he dropped out would make a difference in five years, when he was working the overnight shift at a gas station somewhere.
Blink leant over and tried to casually observe what he was writing. Of course, Blink was blind in that eye and had to turn his neck the whole way around, which made being casual hard. Spot whapped him in the shoulder without stopping writing, and was actually annoyed when the bell rang, because it meant he and his notebook had to relocate. He was on a roll.
The next few periods passed in a blur, because it was just stupid classes he didn't give a damn about, which he wrote through. He wasn't writing about Tony or the Mafia or his father or anything related to the shit he'd actually lived through, he was just... Writing. He didn't even know what it was. He almost never reread anything he wrote, he just got it out of his system and that was that.
Lunchtime approached and he wasn't hungry, but he never was. They sometimes grabbed fast food for lunch instead of the school food--technically, only honor roll kids were allowed to go off school grounds, BUT... Well, Spot was a 'special case,'; Dutchy was a druggie; Blink was the school's only flamer. The administration didn't bother with any of them. Itey actually was an honors student, and Jack didn't do too badly outside of math, so they let it slide.
Spot was just having soda for lunch, but he did steal everyone else's fries because he liked them, and wouldn't have eaten enough to fill his own order anyway. Also, they were good for throwing at people.
A fry glanced off of Dutchy's shoulder and hit the guy at the table next to him, who'd been eating a cheese burger and drinking a soda while reading a paper, and he turned around to glare.
And Spot wasn't sure, but he looked damn familiar and very Italian. He gulped down a breath, muttered a quick apology, and hoped that he was imagining things. After all, this was a guy in McDonald's, wearing casual work clothes, not a freaking suit and sunglasses... But somehow, he doubted the Mafia men wore suits and sunglasses when they were trying to blend in.
Lunch was less fun after that.
F: OH MY GOD MAPLE YOGURT. I AM EATING MAPLE YOGURT.
B: And I am having some sort of bean stew creation my mom made. It's surprisingly good.
F: I DIDN'T KNOW MAPLE YOGURT EXISTED BUT IT DOES AND I'M EATING IT.
B: Your caps lock scares me.
F: It's that good.
B: I'll take your word. So, uh, anyway, you can berate us for sucking now. It's been more than a month since the last update and it's... kind of... both of our faults.
F: Tell them I hate high school.
B: Funkie hates high school. So do I, I went back to visit my HS today, and it was CREEPY 'cause it's been forever since I graduated and I am the OLDEST PERSON EVER.
f: I'M the center of a bunch of stupid rumors because my friends are catty.
B: I'm just old.
F: You are not.
B: I'm olllllllllllllllld. But at least I'm on summer break.
F: I'm not -pout-
B: Mwahahahahaha. The joys of being old.
F: I'm eating more yogurt
B: I have Coke. So it's all good.
You'll never guess what this chapter was celebrated with