Disclaimer same as in all the other chapters. Don't own them, don't claim them, please don't hurt me.

CHAPTER 4

District Court of San Diego

18 hours later

The hallway was still the same, as was the feeling of anxiety that Scully had experienced in what seemed to almost a year prior to this. She sat alone on the bench, her elbows on her knees, staring at her hands, which were clasped together. After a moment, she noticed just how tightly her hands were gripping each other. She exhaled slowly, thinking this was a posture she had seen her partner in numerous times.

She pushed the thought away and tried to focus her attention on the present. In this particular moment, she felt more alone than ever. She looked at her watch for the 30th time and started to lightly tap her foot on the ground.

Before long, she heard the rhythmic sound of footsteps approaching and she scooted over so that her mother could sit down.

"Thanks for coming, Mom," she said somberly. "I'm sorry to pull you away from your vacation with Bill and Tara. I just needed someone who would understand here."

Her mother reached down and squeezed her only daughter's hand. Then she reached up and pushed a stray lock of hair out of Scully's face.

"Dana, where's Fox?" she inquired softly. "Didn't he come with you?"

Scully half-smirked at this. No matter how many times she had instructed her mother otherwise, she still called Mulder by his first name.

"His mother gave him that name for a reason, Dana," she would always say in response. "I'm just being respectful. I would expect the same from her."

Then it occurred to her, she had no idea if there was a story behind his first name or not. Despite her best efforts, she found herself wondering if Fowley knew.

She shook her head to rid herself of the thought but Margaret Scully interpreted it as a response to her previous question.

"Is everything okay, dear?" she asked, concern framing her lovely, mature face.

Scully smiled faintly and nodded.

"I'm fine, Mom," she said. "I needed to do this without Mulder."

She knew that was half true. She did need to do this without her partner, but she was far from fine. Deep down, she was a wreck, a bundle of nerves and all she really wanted to do was stomp her feet, scream, yell and throw things.

But that would look childish. And she knew wherever he was, her father would expect better from her.

She expected better from herself.

But Margaret Scully could pass as the human lie detector any day and she didn't buy her daughter's response.

"What's happened?"

Scully sat there and thought about it. She didn't really want to get into this now. But she could feel the foundation of her sanity beginning to crack and the only person she could trust to tell this to was the woman sitting next to her.

Before she knew it, she was confessing like she was talking to a priest.

"I didn't tell him I was coming here," she began. "I know he would've come with me had I asked, but this….I just needed to be for me."

Margaret Scully wordlessly rubbed her daughter's back as she continued.

"It's hard to explain. I just feel like … I don't know, like I'm losing myself in some ways. I've found myself becoming more and more dependant on him. Everything in my life is connected to him in some way, and yet that connection can sometimes feel so toxic. I'm putting so much stock, so much faith into one person that he is actually becoming a part of who I am. And it scares the hell out of me."

"Why Dana?"

She stared at the wall for a moment and then looked down. Her face colored by the crimson of shame.

"I think maybe I have put more into him than he has into me, Mom. And I find myself wondering more and more what my life would be like had I walked away early on. But what scares me is that the idea of that is so wounding, and in feeling that way, I realize I would make all the same decisions I have to this point. And that makes me feel so…..so……"

Scully bit her lower lip and looked away from her mother.

"Pathetic. Especially since I should be thinking about other things, right now. Now of all times."

Margaret pulled her daughter into a mother's embrace and stroked her head, providing her with the same unspoken comfort as she did when Dana was a child and upset at the misgivings of life.

"Dana, you are stronger than you give yourself credit for. You always have been. And whatever you are feeling inside right now, whatever doubts you may be having about your life, there is one thing I am certain of."

Scully met her mother's eyes and tried to keep her lower lip from trembling.

"Fox Mulder is a better person because of you and you are because of him. Even if neither of you can ever admit that. You just have to trust it."

Dana's response was interrupted as the courtroom door swung open. A tall, middle-aged woman in a navy blue suit signaled to Scully and her mother. Robotically, the two women stood up and walked into the courtroom.

After a few moments, an older man wearing a black rob sat in an overpriced chair overlooking the wide and mostly empty courtroom. He removed his glasses and looked down at Scully. She swallowed hard, as nervous as if God himself were about to judge her.

"Miss Scully, I have reviewed your petition for posthumous adoption of one, Emily Sim, and I must tell you, this case was indeed a rarity for me. I don't think I need to remind you that posthumous adoptions are not something that happen everyday and when they do, the circumstances have to be extraordinary. "

Scully faintly nodded as the judge flipped through some papers.

"I can't even begin to adequately understand how the young girl came to be or how genetically, she was your daughter, however, the DNA and the science in her medical records are irrevocable, which gives me no doubt that Emily Sim was, biologically, your daughter."

Scully swallowed hard again. She had an idea of where this was going but she was not ready to admit it, until the judge said "But…"

"Biology aside, there are no additional members of the Sim family to represent the child's interest, even in the posthumous sense. I haven't been given anything substantial to believe this child was not part of a family. Therefore, I have no adequate proof that this girl wasn't given the proper parental care as you attest. Because of this, I can see no judicious reason to approve your posthumous adoption request. I'm sorry Miss Scully."

The judge then stood and left.

Scully sat in her chair, contemplating what had just been finalized. Her mother rested her hand on her shoulder.

"It was a long shot," Scully said dryly. "I knew it would be."

Margaret Scully squeezed her daughter's shoulder in silence.

"I just wanted her to have something of mine that was lasting, Mom," she said slowly as the tears she fought to control finally came raging out. "I just wanted her to have our name."