Sydney slowly walked down a stony grey corridor. She was holding the hand of a pretty little girl who wore a gentle pink dress; she quickly realised she was wearing it too. At first she thought the child was her own, her daughter- her daughter with Vaughn, but it quickly dawned on her it was herself as a child- a shy girl brimming with innocence, enviously oblivious to the evil around her. The pair smiled at each other and continued to walk; they swung their arms, their hands still holding as if children in a playground. They felt pleasantly comforted by each other's presence until the little girl stopped suddenly, her eyes wide and fixed on the door just up ahead they had been walking towards but not getting any closer to.
"What is it Sydney?" she asked the little girl softly "Are you scared?" the child nodded looking up at her, "Its ok. No one can hurt you, not while I'm here. And I'm not going anywhere." The girl's fearful expression seemed to go and she appeared more calm and placid than before. Sydney studied her younger self for a while and nodded once. She started to walk again but the girl didn't shift; her infant reflection stayed routed to the spot, her eyes dark and staring. She was determined they were not to go any nearer to the door. "Come on. I told you- its ok," she said a little more sternly than before pulling the infant's arm gently "Come on Sydney" she stated, anger beginning to show its presence in her voice. She looked down at her for a couple of seconds- the child stared back, a frightening fierceness glowing in her eyes. "Sydney! Move. Now"
"No!" Sydney let go of the girl's hand as she spoke in shock at her own voice sounding from the little girls mouth. "You are so stubborn!" the child shouted angrily, the anomalous maturity of her voice echoing along the length of the corridor. Water began to drip down the wall, the steady trickle quickly becoming a sporadic and uncontrollable surge. Sydney shook her head
"I don't care what you say. I have to know," she said looking back at the door. She began walking towards it once more, this time faster and more confidently leaving the little girl behind. She heard her pleading behind her
"Please Sydney no!" the child begged, her voice having returned to that of a normal young girl. She heard the splash of the small child's footsteps as she ran towards her. Sydney heard a little scream as she fell in the water and she spun round to help her. The enfant picked her self up slowly and beginning to whimper produced a greyish knife from the water beneath her. Light flashed along its sharp-rimmed edge, the bright whiteness burning Sydney's eyes. With a small cry Sydney dodged the lunge of the little girl, the sharp metal knicking at the flesh of her stomach where her scar lay. Syd began to run towards the door looking over her shoulder seeing the girl advancing quickly behind her, clutching at her stomach. The image her eyes drank in disturbed her; the child's features contorting, her darkened face becoming misshapen and twisted with hate. Sydney backed against the door, perplexed and disgusted, the image sickening her to her core. She was in turmoil: should she fight her younger self- willingly hurt her, or should she continue to dodge her violent actions, playing the defence for a change. Sydney spotted the girl preparing to attack and she swiftly kicked the offending object from her hand, sweeping her legs out from underneath her with one neat kick. The girl yelped slightly, splashing in the water as she fell. Sydney was panting heavily, bending over and placing her hands against her knees. Her throat stung and her chest was convulsing aggressively; she couldn't understand why she was so warn out after such little physical activity. Sydney's sharp intakes of breath suddenly stopped, the sound of her own voice filling the corridor once again. She kept her head down, her eyes fixed on the swirling blackened water beneath her.
"I warned you. I told you didn't want to see what was in there." Sydney slowly raised her eye line. She saw an identical now adult version of herself staring back at her, crouched, her dark eyes burning into their template. Syd's angrier reflection grabbed her hair yanking her head back. She felt a sharp pain burn through the roots of the soft brown fibres, her mouth open, sucking in cool air with a pained hiss. Her attacker spun her around to face the door. "You wanted to see? Fine." She kicked the door open revealing a grassy garden boxed by attractive aging brick walls where ivy lavishly grew. There were brightly coloured flowers filling forgotten spaces, while a gentle greenery swallowed the edges of the lush emerald square. Sydney smiled almost forgetting the pain swimming through her skull. There was a tree to the left of the garden and besides the coffee colour trunk sat a graceful white bath. Sydney was thrown forwards by her attacker, and with slight trepidation, stepped across the grass. She turned back towards the cold eyes of her doppelganger who watched her intently. She noticed the door and corridor were no longer present and she turned her head back, her hesitant steps continuing. Sydney's body trembled in anguish, already knowing the image see was going to be greeted with when she met her destination. She felt she had had this memory so many times, yet every occasion this poisoned image seeped through her tired brain, the fear, the abhorrence, and the pain from such a sickening and disturbing picture never subsided. Her guilt never left her, always a constant irritation in the deeper regions of her soul- this, she could not compartmentalise.
As she approached the smooth and linear curves of the porcelain, she chastised herself; selfishly, she pondered, she had not thought about Danny and his murder for a long time, the pain of her present life coating everything she knew in a thick waxy glaze. Her hatred for Sloane had now become similar to many such cases of repulsion and anger; automatic- the reasons for such a strong disgust now only a raw and dusty memory. She was close now, her eye line almost able to cascade down the inner walls of the bath and to see its bloody contents; her steps became small, the blades of grass embossed with her footprints. She looked down at her feet, noting how her clothes had changed into jeans and a white shirt. She frowned, biting her lip not wanting to see the image she had so many times. Quickly, she made one final step towards the golden-clawed feet of the bath; hesitantly she peered over the edge, her features falling at the sensation the image threw at her. Her hands gripped ferociously at the cool sides of the bath, a scream ripping through the softness of her throat. The sight of his mangled body was not what she had been expecting, his glazed eyes piercing her heart. White-hot tears sliced through her flesh, falling from her jaw onto the swaying blades of the green carpet. She bit into the flesh of her hand, reaching towards his cold corpse. She squeezed her eyes shut trying to eradicate the image from her mind. Heavy sobs rattled through her entire body, interlaced with burning screams.
"Vaughn!" She screamed, shaking aggressively at his body. This wasn't how it was meant to be, he was supposed to love her forever, be with her forever, stay with her forever. The blood in the bath began to rise quickly, Vaughn's body soon becoming submerged in the thick, oozing liquid. She choked out a cry as his elegant features disappeared under the deep burgundy substance, the blood seeping and glugging over the edge of the bath, staining the cool enamel of it sides. She stepped back, her eyes wide with fear and pain.
"Aw. Has lover-boy been in a little accident?" Sneered a cold British voice from behind her. Sydney's head snapped up and she slowly began to turn towards the voice. There, where her doppelganger had previously been, stood the very amused and hateful face of an unwanted memory.
"Lauren" Sydney hissed. Lauren looked over Sydney's shoulder towards the bath
"Tut tut. What a mess huh Sydney? Your poor, poor Vaughn" she sneered with emphasis placed on his name. "Oh, you're not going to cry are you?"
"I wouldn't give you the satisfaction," Sydney said walking slowly towards her
"You know this time, he isn't here to save you"
"What?" Sydney asked, but she was silenced by a blow to the head, the pain which sliced through her brain causing her to double over away from Lauren
"The last time we fought Sydney- the only reason you won, was because he saved you. He's the only reason you're alive and now look. Look at how you've repaid him." With a yell Sydney threw her leg in the air behind her, kicking Lauren square in the jaw. She let out a high-pitched grunt, stumbling backwards, yer hand pressed to her face. She threw a punch but missed allowing Sydney to grab her arm and push it back towards her, the effect of which causing Lauren to elbow herself in the nose. Lauren swung her arm at Sydney, the back of her hand colliding with Sydney's cheek. Syd, slightly bent over felt Lauren's elbow connect with her spine and so punched Lauren hard in the stomach. She stood to round kick the annoying British woman, but she caught Sydney's foot and kicked her other leg from underneath her. Syd, not wanting to go down alone, yanked at Lauren's hair taking her with her.
They landed on the ground with a thud, a soft carpet breaking Syd's fall. She winced slightly, a pressured pain clamping and crushing against her skull. She momentarily forgot the attacker leaning over her body until she felt a sharp pain in her neck. Sydney ripped her eyes open to see Lauren kneeling infront of her. She was sat in a chair similar to that in Typai, her arms and legs bound by a thick wire, which cut into her skin. She didn't look down, but she recognised the feel of the outfit shewore also in Typai when she went with Vaughn, the plastic material of her bra cutting into her flesh. She saw a piece of bright red hair fall across her eyes, immediately recognising it from the mission after which she met him and discovered the truth about who she really worked for. A familiar pain seeped through her mouth, and she quickly realised it was that caused by Dr Lei and his pliers. She felt her mouth swell, the excruciating throbbing in her mouthresulting in an overwhelming desire toscream. She looked at the surroundings in front of her, Lauren having suddenly gone from the picture. She was sat in her living room she noticed, and apart from a slow gentle ticking, a pleasant silence dusting over the furniture. She heard Lauren calling her, her voice malicious and taunting, her breath cutting into her ear.
"I've injected you with a paralysing toxin; right now if you tried, you wouldn't be able to move any part of your body except your eyes, which for me is perfect, because all I want you to do is watch." She grabbed Sydney's jaw, her nails biting into her flesh, yanking her head to her left. There in the middle of Sydney's living room stood her and Vaughn kissing gently. She watched as he slowly placed his arm around her waist, his fingertips gently brushing over her cheek. She wanted to smile but could not, but through the pain that clamped down on her jaw, she could feel the smooth caress of his lips on hers and the gentle toying of his velvet tongue. She heard herself hum into his mouth from across the living room, finding joy in the way they looked like together.
Sydney's heart sped up however when she saw Lauren approach herself and Vaughn. She was grinning like a Cheshire cat, hopping about from foot to foot madly. She circled them coming up beside them, similar to the way Weiss had in SD-6. Sydney tried to scream, to shout, to let them know what was happening, but they were only aware of each other and not the woman standing besides them. Inside she was screaming Vaughn's name, alerting him to Lauren who was now holding her finger to her lips as if to silence her attempts to warn them. Sydney's eyes went wide as with one swift movement Lauren thrust a knife deep into Vaughn's back. He opened his mouth against her own, his legs giving way as she ripped the knife from his flesh. Sydney watched in horror as Lauren hit her other self across the skull with the butt of the knife. She circled the couple watching as Vaughn crawled to Sydney leaving a bloody trail behind him. Tied in the chair she listened as he told her everything would be alright and that he would always love her, and she felt herself sob against the constricts of the chair. Vaughn kissed her tenderly as she lay crying on the floor, Lauren who had seemingly grown tired of the image below her rolled her eyes, producing a gun from her belt
"Bored now" she said melodramatically, firing two bullets into Sydney's skull. Vaughn screamed as a fine spray of blood clouded in the air around them, coating Lauren's clothes. Syd watched with repulsion, Lauren kicking Vaughn in the chin as he bent over her own corpse, weeping at the sight before him. He landed on his back with a thud on the floor and Lauren threw her gun across the room. Her knife, now having become a long machete-like weapon, gleamed in her hand as she twizzled it by the handle. Vaughn gasped as she raised it high above her head, two hands gripping it, her knuckles white
"Lauren n-" the axe-like blaze thrashed at Vaughn's body, and Sydney quickly averted her eyes, hot tears stinging her pupils. She heard Vaughn's grunts as Lauren continued to stab him with the metal, and yet she suddenlyappeared inches before her, blood coating her as if a thin layer of perspiration. Out the corner of her eye, Sydney could see Lauren hacking away at Vaughn, the dullness of the blade producing a muted metallic sound. She looked at Lauren who was reaching towards the wound in her stomach, smiling wildly. Sydney felt the effects of the toxin begging to ware off as she moved her arms slightly against her restraints. She cried out in agony, as Lauren began to pull plastic tubing from the open scar of her stomach, blood flowing freely down Sydney's legs. She screamed, arching her back and squeezing her eyes closed. She quickly realised she could no longerfeel pain from Lauren's actions but could still see them through closed eyes. In the distant she heard her taunting her, laughing and jeering, but in the foreground of her mind, she heard a much sweeter sound, one she was more used to. She could feel Vaughn's mouth pressed to her ear, remembering how it felt to have him tell her he loved her. Sydney felt her body becoming less tense, her arms freeing from her bondage; the cold and harsh feel of the chair dissipating. She felt herself being laid down, her body sinking into a soft surface. Vaughn's soothing tone became warmer and closer until she could finally feel his touch against her.
Vaughn lazily shut the door of the shower allowing the small drops of condensation to fall slothfully to the floor. He grabbed what had now become his towel from the hook on the back of the door trying his shoulders without much concentration. He quickly wrapped the ticklish material around his waist, grabbing his blue toothbrush from the silver cup on the sink. It made a lazily metallic clatter and he silently told it to be quiet- its small complaint irritating him.
A few minutes later, Vaughn splashed water to his face, its coldness slicing through him; he shivered slightly, goose bumps rising up from the tender and tanned flesh of his arms. He removed the towel replacing it with the fresh pair of grey boxers he had picked up before he entered the now clammy room. There was a tiny snap as he let the elastic of the material spring back to his stomach. Vaughn then grabbed the towel off the floor wiping away the condensation from the mirror with a couple of sweeps. He spotted the scar embedded into his chest-it lay unassuming just under his ribs, its colour contrasting with the tone of his skin. He remembered Sydney's words as she plunged the knife into him, the desire to apologise to her once more overwhelming him. He had betrayed her- he'd been so stupid, so blind.
Vaughn's heart lurched at a sincere and terrifying sound. Sydney's scream reverberated around him, more frightening than anything he had ever known. He desperately clawed at the doorknob, trying to get it open; in his haste his grip slipped, the moisture of the bathroom sticking to him like a glue. He ran to her, falling on his knees at her side; heslid against the carpet,it ripping and burning against his flesh. She was clutching at her scar, her scream piercing into the dark of the room and his heart. He tried to wake her but to no avail, and soon after she began screaming his name. His heart momentarily stopped as her voice ravished a word she usually spoke so sweetly and so often. The way it now clawed from her mouth paralysed him- no longer was she whispering his name into the night, her mouth pressed close to his; now she seemed stuck in some tormenting realm, a blanket of emotional and physical pain smothering her. Her cries and whimpers sucked the light from his soul, causing a sharp pain to stab at his conscious
"Sydney! Sydney?" he tried to keep his voice soothing and calm, but only a frenzied cry emanated from his throat. He began to cry, the feeling of utter helplessness coursing through his body. "Syd...baby, please wake up..." he half sobbed as he sat up on the bed beside her. He tried to prevent her from thrashing as best he could without seeming threatening or forceful. He held her shoulder and her arm against the mattress, trying to distribute the pressure evenly, he only used a fraction of his weight against her, fearful of hurting or scaring her more. They both knew he was stronger than she was, but still her body thrashed against the force he applied. A sharp pain slammed into his brow, as her arm clipped the socket of his eye. Still not letting go of her arm, he pressed a hand to the pain, pressing down on it. Normally he would have hissed at the throbbing sting, but now he simply held her hand brushing the pad of his thumb against her knuckles. "Shhh its ok Syd. Its ok- I'm here now." He whispered to her "No one can hurt you anymore. I'll never let anyone hurt you again, I promise." He brushed the hair from her eyes, observing the way the moisture across her brow had made it stick to her forehead. Her head thrashed from side to side occasionally. For a small while her head was still, and he bent down to place a small chaste kiss to her mouth, a gentle gesture he made every time she slept beside him. To his surprise she returned the kiss, allowing it to become more deep and languid, wrapping her arms around him, pulling him to her. He moved his hand as to gently place his finger tips against her cheek, whilst the other placed upon her hip. Her hand lazily ran down his back, the other resting against his shoulder. Relief swam through him as she moaned into his mouth, a moan he was more used to- at first he thought she had woken, her violent movements stopping, and her screams and gasps subsiding, but this thought was quickly banished as her back arched into the pillow, her mouth leaving his.
She screamed violently, her nails scratching into the tenderness of his back. She began crying, her eyes squeezing tight. She kept repeating the same words, quietly pleading to an unnamed attacker. Vaughn didn't know what to do or what to say. He wasn't sure how to sooth her or wake her from her ordeal. To keep her from thrashing further, he took her by the arm between her wrist and elbows, pinning them more forcefully to the mattress; he bent down and kissed her of the forehead, her heat seeping through him. He then placed his head against her whispering words of comfort and warmth. Gradually her screams subsided, but she still sobbed heavily, crying out every now and then. Sydney still fought against his strength, her shoulders leaving the softness of the mattress every few seconds. Vaughn brushed his thumb against the softness of her skin, communicating how he was not a threat; he squeezed his eyes shut as she cried out his name as if in mourning- it was a painful noise he was more than familiar with, for an identical tone had escaped him many times after he had lost her. Vaughn tried his best to be strong for her, to keep calm and to mouth words of comfort to her, but a small sob emanated from him. It was quickly followed by another and then another; the silent shaking of his body accompanied by slowly cascading tears. She was quiet for a while, only crying now. He removed his right hand from her wrists to stroke her cheek, discovering too many tears to absently brush away. Still dreaming, she softly snaked her hand around his lower back, pulling him towards her gently. He wasn't sure whether to get any closer to her in case she felt smothered, but the urgency and sadness of her movements and the beginning of louder sobbing caused him to move.
Never breaking contact with her, he carefully straddled her, allowing his hand to return to her wrist as her actions became wilder once again. Child like wails leaked from her, and her chest began to convulse with emotion. "Shhh baby, it's ok. I promise its ok. I'm here Sydney. You're guardian angel is here- no one can do anything when I'm here and I will never leave you again" his voice broke slightly "I promise I'll always be here. I'll love you forever Syd. Just please wake up for me Syd. Please Sydney. I need you to wake up for me." He felt her chest rise and fall against his, his forehead still pressed against hers gently. Tears slipped from his close eyes, falling into the empty darkness of the room. With a small and final cry she woke suddenly; she was still for a second, silence overcoming her.
"V-Vaughn..." she sobbed, throwing her arms around his neck. Her body shook against him as she cried into the crook of his neck, the sound purer and less disorientated than before. He nestled into her shoulder, squeezing his eyes shut; he opened his eyes again,looking up to the ceiling momentarily trying to control his emotions as he pressed his hand to her back. Vaughn's left arm supported them both- Syd's back off the mattress, her chest pressed to his. He slowly lowered her, again taking care as not to break their contact. He carefully lay her down, letting her body gently press down on top of her "Shhh. Its ok now" he murmured, caressing the base of her neck with his thumb and pressing a kiss to her cheek. Sydney turned her head towards him as his mouth left her, their lips a breath apart. She leant upwards slightly, desperate for his contact. Their kiss was similar to before, slow yet dark, the caring sensuality of the relationship reflected in the caress of their tongues. Tears still flowing, she moaned once again into his mouth as he carefully moved onto his back, bringing her with him. He broke the kiss sweetly, gently brushing his nose against hers; with onehand he pulled the sheets over them both, the other still stoking her warm skin. She was saddened when she noticed the moisture of tears on his cheeks, and she let her thumb glide across his cheekbone.
She moved her hips off him so they rested to his side, coiling her legs with his. He held her close to him as she continued to cry softly, and he pressed another kiss to her crown.
"I love you," she murmured against him
"I love you" he stated softly his voice cracking
"Let me fall asleep with you inside me" she whispered to his ear
"Are you sure?" he responded tentatively, but the only response he got was a slow languorous kiss. She pulled him on top of her, moaning at the comfortable pressure his body created atop of hers. He broke the kiss, looking her in the eyes to verify she was sure- she smiled, the fear and pain of her dream still evident in her eyes. He slowly and gently plunged into her, the tenderness of his actions overwhelming her. She moaned softly as he entered her, his soft sigh against her neck making her smile. He pressed a kiss to her shoulder and once more rolled onto his back allowing his legs to tangle with hers. She groaned at the friction his movement caused and snuggled against the warmth of his bare chest. She curled up against him, placing her head on his chest under his chin; in a few minutes they had fallen asleep. They both knew they had to a lot of talking to do, about what had just happened and other things, but for now they were both content to stay like this for a while, getting over the sorrow of the past eleven months before being ready to discuss it openly. Happily, Sydney realised the angry nightmares she had been haunted by so many nights after her return would soon disappear, her loneliness dissipating the moment he had kissed her on her doorstep a week ago. And even if they didn't leave her, she mused, she would have Vaughn to drive away her demons, to comfort her into the night, his calming words and touch the only thing to break through the barrier of her anguished subconscious. They were closer now than they had ever been, their relationship deeper and more serious than either could ever have predicted, and their love-unbreakable.
Phew, ok. Dying to know what you thought of it. Please let me know. Thanks for reading and sorry about the long gap. Hope you had a fantastic christmas and new years! I've just realised I have an AS exam in er...12 hours which i should be revising for. Hope it was ok. love you all- love dani xxx