Substitute

Hard choices and solutions.

"If it hadn't been for you, I probably would have killed that Hollow in a move, booger-face!"

"What? I was already a step from killing it, stupid ape!"

"Ehh...guys..."

"Whaddaya mean? I was there first! Then you just have to copy me and interrupt, stupid!"

"You're stupid! And cheap! Taichou had already told you to stay away until further notice!"

"You know..."

"And that's why you're stupid! You copied me! Do you think Taichou would pick someone as stupid as you?"

"Oh, shut up! I don't think he will pick someone who ignores his orders with lame and cheap excuses!"

"Excuse me!"

"Pffftt...Yeah, right, as if you really had the chance."

"Oh, yes I do. A lot more than you."

"Kotsubaki! Kiyone! Please! Listen!" Isane screamed.

The two bickering third seats immediately abandoned their banter. They averted their attention to Isane with a look that seemed to dare her to stop them again. The target of such attack was not perturbed the slightest.

"Now, you two are in the fourth division's infirmary so please", Isane raised her voice, "do as I say!"

"Well he started it!" Kiyone pointed to Sentarou, who quickly slapped the finger away.

"Shaddup! You began the fight in the first place!"

"Did not!"

"Did too! Who interrupted me back then? You!"

"This is the thanks I get for saving your butt?"

"What saving? You endangered it, ape girl!"

"You two!" Isane screamed again, losing all of her patience.

The door opened, revealing Unohana as she stepped in.

"Is something wrong, Isane? I thought I heard your voice from outside of the infirmary."

"Y-Yes, Taichou", Isane apologized, throwing a dirty look to the third seats, who were avoiding each other's eyes, "I had to calm these two down somehow."

"Is that so? I take it that they have already recovered, then?" Unohana carefully surveyed them.

"Yes!" Sentarou blurted. "I have fully recover--Ow!" Kiyone punched him right at the bandaged spot, opening the wound again.

"No he hasn't! I have!" Too excited, her wound too was opened again. "Ouch!"

"Haha! You deserved that!" Sentarou laughed, causing the wound to open wider.

"You deserved that more than I do!" Kiyone, on the other hand, lowered her voice.

Isane threw an exasparated look at Unohana. The captain just sighed.

"Kotsubaki-san. Kiyone-san. As Isane has told you earlier", she spoke calmly, although the two got the feeling that they shouldn't mess with this one, "this is the fourth division main infirmary. As such, as long as you are inside this building, you are my responsibility, so if you can please cooperate with us", they slowly nodded, "thank you."

She turned to her vice captain. "Treat to their wounds separately. I'm going to talk to Ukitake-taichou."

"Ah! Taichou is here? I mustn't let him see me like this!" Sentarou shouted. The sisters glared at him.

"That's cheap--"

"Please! Enough! Yamada!"

"H-Hai!" Hanatarou, who had been eavesdropping, embarrassedly came into the room.

"Take Kotsubaki-san to another room. While I", she glared at her sister, "have some sister bonding to do."

Unohana nodded. "I leave them in your hands."

As soon as she was outside, Unohana just had to shake her head. As she did so, she noticed Ukitake pacing up and down the corridor.

"Unohana-taichou! How are they?" He wasted no time in asking her as he noticed her around.

"Judging from the noise, they are fine. However, they still need a few days in our care just in case anything goes wrong."

Ukitake exhaled dramatically. "Thank goodness. When I saw the both of them rushing at the Hollow I knew it was going to end this way. Oh, and sorry about all the noise they cause."

"Not at all, Ukitake-taichou", she said warmly, "Zaraki-taichou's men have been more troublesome, and so we are prepared for this kind of behavior."

"But still", Ukitake shook his head, "rushing to a Hollow head first, then bickering in front of it, causing themselves to get injured..."

"Ukitake-taichou, why haven't you picked a vice captain yet?" Unohana said slowly.

Ukitake smiled grimly. "Because that won't solve the problem. You see, they've been like this ever since Kaien passed away. If I pick one of them as his replacement, who knows...I might have another subordinate dying."

"I see. Then maybe you should pick an outsider? Forgive me if I'm intruding, but I think they are fighting for that position."

"Yes, yes. That's why I've been torn lately. If I pick anyone as a vice captain, they will most likely bite at that person's head. If I pick one of them, then they will beat each other to pulp. If I don't pick anyone at all, like now, then they're fighting for it. You see", Ukitake coughed, "it's a lose/lose situation for any of us."

"Forgive me for bringing that up." Unohana bowed her head.

"Ah, don't worry about it. Actually, I should be the one apologizing to everyone to make them so worried", Ukitake said sadly.

"Everyone?"

"Kyouraku had expressed this many, many times before. Even Soi-taichou had snidely remarked about it when we last met."

"You are doing the right thing, Ukitake-taichou", Unohana said soothingly, "I think that is especially why such banters exist."

"Really?"

"Yes. Your strength lies in your wisdom and kindness. No wonder they would fight for the closest position to you."

"Ahh...thank you very much, Unohana-taichou."

"Not at all."

"Stupid head! Now thanks to you, the captain will be mad at us!"

"Oy! I didn't begin yelling in the first place! He'll surely be mad at you!"

"You guys! I will kick you out if this continues!"

Ukitake sighed heavily. "Oh, brother."