A/N: Hey everyone! Before I do anything, I have to address 'xxx'. (I don't know if anyone noticed it, but it was towards the end of the last chapter, I think around the second time they went to visit Harry in the hospital.) I wrote 'xxx' because I wanted to know if anyone noticed what recent movie I used that from. I forgot to mention it last chapter, so I just put it here. It's not important really, I just thought it was funny.

Oh I have another question. I heard from someone that this site doesn't really want authors to write personal shout outs anymore. Is that true? If it is, then that makes me sad because I love writing back to you guys to let you know how much I appreciate your reviews. But, I'm not sure about the new rules. So sorry guys. But if you have any questions or whatever, e-mail me!

Anyway, thanks for the responses from the last chapter! Some really made me laugh. Thanks a lot. :) :) :)

Okay so they're all Hogwarts now! So more people, more fights, and more laughs!

Ch3- "Well, what does your letter say?"

"I could care less."

"Fine, give it here."

"Don't touch my mail."

"As your wife, I can."

"Touch it Hermione and I swear you're pulling back a bloody stub."

"Touché." She stood there for a second before she smiled and ran away.

Draco rolled his eyes as Hermione bolted upstairs to tell her parents. He picked up her paper again to see that the Head Boy was some stupid bloke from Ravenclaw. He scowled at the paper and thought 'Not for long…'

Chapter 4- Celebrity Couple

"Bye Mum, mmm, love you." Hermione said pressed against her mother in a farewell embrace.

"Mrs. Granger." Draco said stiffly, holding his hand out. Mrs. Granger took his hand and pulled him into an awkward hug.

"Bye Dad." Hermione said, smiling into a hug from her father.

Draco and Mr. Granger just nodded at each other as Hermione and Draco turned away and boarded the train together.

To say a few heads were turned would probably be the biggest understatement of the year.

It seemed as time was frozen, and every single person on the train was entranced with the couple. Hermione smiled timidly as she hurried down the isle to the head compartment, with Draco close behind her, insisting that he sat with her. He strode down the isles smirking at everyone as if he was posing for the magazine cover of Witch Weekly. (Which he already did…twice).

Somehow, through way of miracle, no one said anything. They all just stared fixatedly. And aside from how intimidating that was for Hermione, she thanked Merlin she didn't have to answer any questions….yet.

Once they slid into the compartment, that's when everyone moved. Students bomb rushed the two by knocking on the doors and windows, asking all kind of questions. Draco stood up, locking the door and shutting the blinds, and then sat back down.

"That was insane. I felt like a celebrity- making everyone stand still and then rush for my autograph. But that wasn't very fun though." Hermione said, placing her things neatly over the seat on the shelf above.

"Ah yes, the luxuries of being a Malfoy." Draco smirked and laid back on the couch.

Hermione scoffed. "It had nothing to do with who you were, but who you were with."

"Oh like they would all gawk at you?"

"No. I'm just saying they were looking at us together….with rings…as in married. I think that's the big shock. Not because 'A Malfoy graced their presence'." She explained.

"Whatever."

She left it at that. She was in no mood for an argument right now. It was her first day back of her last year, and she wanted to have a peaceful train ride. Not that it was uncommon for her and Draco to fight on the ride back to school; each year they'd share unpleasantries and a few spiteful words. But, then they'd be on their way and out of each other's hair.

Boy had that changed.

After a few minutes in silence, the students sat back down and left the couple alone. Fifteen minutes later, a stern knock was heard at the door, and Professor McGonagall entered their compartment. She looked at the two seriously before a small smile formed across her lips.

"Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Malfoy, on your marriage and your new promotions. I was shocked, to say the least, at hearing of this new union, but with a long talk with the headmaster, we thought it was for the best. So, firstly I would like to send my best wishes for your future together."

"Thank you." Hermione said, trying to fake a smile. On the inside she wanted to throw up all over the woman. 'Their future together?' Give her a break.

"Yes, thank you." Draco said, smirking slightly. Already the most important teachers were on his side. This was turning out as planned.

"Now for your promotions. Mrs. Malfoy, you were already aware that you would be taking on the position of Head Girl at school, correct?"

"Yes, Professor." Hermione genuinely smiled. At least there was something she could be proud of without having to share it with the devil himself…one she called 'husband'.

"Now the original Head Boy for this year chose to resign this morning, though his reasons he said were of a personal nature. In this new turn of events, we have decided, since Mr. Malfoy is a school prefect and was also a candidate for this position, that he should be the Head Boy for this school year."

"What?'

Hermione's jaw had dropped open. This was not supposed to happen! She was looking forward to being with Todd of Ravenclaw as her partner. He was someone responsible, someone who would do all his share of the work, someone who was dedicated, and someone who loved the school.

Basically, someone who wasn't Malfoy.

Now, she would have to do everything. All the work, all the planning, everything.

To add insult to injury, now he would be around even more often because they were both working AND sharing a living space together.

Life was just full of surprises, wasn't it?

Hermione looked over to Draco whose face looked indifferent; like it didn't matter to him if he got the position or not. But his eyes showed something else. They held a satisfactory look, like they were almost… triumphant.

He did something to Todd to make him step down.

What. A. Bastard.

She'd have to find out about that later.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Draco's voice.

"…and it'd be an honor to represent and help run the school. Thank you."

"You are very welcome. I will see you two when we arrive. I expect you'll help lead the first years to Hagrid and make sure the rest of the students get on the carriages." McGonagall smiled brightly and left. But Hermione couldn't believe it. If she wasn't mistaken, McGonagall did a more of something in these past few minutes than she probably had ever done in years.

She smiled….a lot.

And the weirdest part was that it wasn't even at her star student.

No, it was at her worst.

At Malfoy.

Was it just her, or had the world turned upside down without her consent?

Oh wait, that's right, it did. Right around the same time she went and married a Death Eater.

"What did you do Malfoy?" Hermione turned on him the second the door shut.

"I just got Head Boy. Even you can understand English, Granger."

"What. Did. You. DO?"

"What are you babbling about?' He rolled his eyes while sighing.

"Malfoy this wasn't your position. You don't deserve it! Todd was a very good choice and I know he didn't just resign for 'personal reasons'."

"Stop harassing me."

"I'm not harassing you."

"Oh really? The twenty questions, the constant badgering, the angry eyes…could've fooled me."

"I can't believe you'd sink that low! Does this position mean that much to you that you would blackmail, or threaten, or do whatever it is you did to get this?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about." He smirked.

"You are impossible." She huffed.

"And you're a bitch. Life goes on."

Hermione stared at him and turned to leave. He didn't even ask where she was going, he just took out a magazine from his bag and started reading.

Can you say, asshole?

Though, on second thought…he probably didn't say anything because he figured that she'd be back in about fifteen minutes, seeing as they were on a moving train with no places to go…

But the 'asshole' theory made her feel a lot better.

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"Hey Harry, Ron." Hermione smiled, opening the door and sitting next to Ron; Harry sat across her.

"Hermione." They both replied flatly.

"Oh c'mon boys. There is no need for that. I already apologized and seeing how there is nothing you can do about it, there's no reason to be mean."

"But Hermione, he's Malfoy!" Ron whined. Honestly, sometimes he could be such a baby. It got so annoying.

"He is also my husband." She answered.

"Do you love him?" Ron asked seriously.

For a second, Hermione sat still. No one had asked her that question before, and she and Draco hadn't 'practiced' saying it either. It wasn't as if she did love him, no no…DEFINITELY wasn't that…but actually confronting the question was a lot stranger than she had pictured it.

By not answering, Ron misinterpreted her silence as if he asked the most obvious question on earth… like it didn't even deserve a reply. As if she would say- 'Of course I love him, what kind of question is that?'

"Sorry. Stupid question. You would never marry someone you didn't love."

"Right, stupid question." She said quietly, but she could've sworn Harry gave her that skeptical look. You know, 'that look' where he knew what she was thinking, or why she couldn't answer the simple question.

That boy knew too much for his own good.

"So why are you in here?" Ron asked.

"I wanted to visit you two. It's our last time riding the train up to school."

"Malfoy acted like a complete arse." Ron stated knowingly, ignoring her lie.

Wait, wait, wait…hold the owl. Since when was Ron perceptive on anything? Oh right, the world flipped when she wasn't looking…

"Sort of. But it's fine. We always argue."

"He's such a jerk, Hermione. I don't know how you put up with him."

"Honestly Ron, neither do I. So…have you seen Ginny? I need to talk with her."

"She's three doors down."

"Thanks. See you two later."

Walking down the three doors, she found Ginny with some more Gryffindors. Ginny excused herself from the party sensing Hermione needed to talk, and she also figured her friend was uncomfortable with all the sexual questions she received from the girls. Most asking if Draco 'put out' if she 'knew what they meant'. It was strange, and this was just the beginning.

Hermione couldn't find an empty compartment, so she sighed, taking Ginny back to her own.

Draco was flung across the seat, turning his wand in his fingers in a bored manner. Looking up at Hermione, he fixed his face to say something crude, but found Ginny next to her and suppressed it.

"Hello sweetheart, Weasley."

"Hey Malfoy." Ginny grinned.

"Draco do you think you could…leave for a few minutes?" she asked nicely, putting on a face for Ginny even though she was about to tell her the truth.

"Why?"

"I need to speak with Ginny."

"I'm not stopping you."

"Alone…please?"

"Well, since you asked so nicely."

Draco got up and gave her a chaste kiss on the cheek and whispered extremely softly in her ear, "Next time, find your own damn space to 'talk' because I won't move." He backed up and smiled at her as if he said something loving, and then walked past the two and out of the room.

"Is it just me or has Malfoy really changed?"

"Just you."

"He seems cute."

"He isn't."

"Hermione is there problems between you and him?" Ginny asked concerned while watching Hermione placing silencing charms and sorts on the room.

"Get comfortable Ginny because I need to tell you some things about me and him. But I need you to also swear you won't breathe word to a soul."

"Oh please Hermione, like you really have to ask."

"Good. Well, Malfoy and I aren't as cute as you think…"

0000000000000000000000000000000000

"Hey mate." Blaise Zabini welcomed Draco when he entered his room. He was currently alone, though Draco knew Pansy and the gang would be along soon.

"Hey Blaise. How's life?"

"Not nearly as good as yours I hear." He smirked.

"Yeah well you should know never to leave me alone for a month by myself. I'll do some crazy things." He smirked.

Blaise laughed. Over the summer, he left England and took a one month vacation to Italy. Well…vacation wasn't really the right word. More like an 'escape-tion'...if that was even a word. Blaise had decided to take a trip to Italy in the middle of the summer, right as the war was heightening. He was Draco's best friend, and he did want to fight beside him, but he refused to be apart of something he didn't believe in. Blaise wasn't on the dark side, nor was he fighting for good. He wanted neither loyalties nor connections, and instead of choosing sides, he visited the 'lovely Italian girls'. All in all, he had one of the best summers of his life, but let's just stay he almost died of a heart attack when he saw the Italian headlines that shouted 'Mr. and Mrs. Malfoy'.

"Now you tell me." He joked. "So, you're a married man Draco. Not the number one bachelor anymore."

"Yes well, I'll be back on the market sooner than you think."

"Really? You don't think this marriage will last?"

"Blaise my friend, it is set up to fail..."

00000000000000000000000000000000000000

Hermione and Draco ran into their room and slammed the door, slumping against the back of it as curious fists hounded the other side.

"That. Was. Insane." Hermione breathed, locking the door and falling on the floor onto her back.

"You're telling me. But it was brilliant." He smiled victoriously, grabbed his bags, and marched off to the 'Head Boy' door up the stairs.

Hermione watched him with an eyebrow raised. He stalked up the middle staircase (with 7 steps) and headed off to the right. He opened his door, placed his bags down, and then jogged back down the stairs.

His happy mood was enough to make her want to jump out their window.

From the moment the feast started, there were whispers passed and fingers pointed, giggles heard and a few menacing glares thrown at Hermione. She tried to ignore it all while Draco soaked in the attention.

Dumbledore had announced his annual welcomes and also proceeded to tell everyone about their 'union' (in both the marital and metaphorical sense). They got cheers of congrats, but mostly, everyone was stunned.

Many of the Gryffindors were acting standoffish towards Hermione that night, and the Slytherins all had ugly smirks on their faces…like they knew why Draco married her. (Even though they didn't. Most of the 7th year boys were just proud of Draco 'bagging the virgin'. How Degrading)

But as soon as Dumbledore sent them all off to their dorms, the questions erupted quicker than one could say 'Quidditch'. While the two walked back to their room, well jogged…okay ran...the really nosey students followed them the whole way. Most girls were whining after Draco, mad that their chances of being with him this year were now non- existent. Others were just happy that the two finally decided to get along…although marriage was about a hundred steps ahead of where they were thinking of a compromise. But, several (mostly the first and second years) were just around them because they thought it was 'so cool' that Hermione and Draco, 'now the celebrity couple' was in their school.

And technically, they were the celebrity couple. They were all over the papers.

It's so sad how people believed anything they read. If they just looked at the two, they could see the truth.

And the best part to Draco was that…all the people who hated him before, or could've absolutely sworn on anything, thathe was a dark wizard, now all held equally confused (still hateful….but extremely confused) expressions on their faces.

Draco Malfoy was so happy he could dance….

…and Hermione Granger…Malfoy… wanted to cut his legs off and watch him squirm.

"Ah, isn't life grand?" Draco asked with a smug grin, walking into the kitchen.

"Define grand."

"Well…As good as it can get with being tied down to a mudblood." Draco said standing in the kitchen, pouring himself some water.

"Or a Malfoy. But in that case, 'grand' would be such a horrid word, representing the worst predicament in life that they'd just might have to rid it of the English language."

"And you say I'm mean."

"You are. Doesn't mean I cannot defend myself by stating the truth."

"Are you thirsty?"

"What?"

"Are you thirsty?"

"Um…well- yes, actually." She answered, taken aback that he was being…well, considerate.

"Well the fridge is over here with a wide selection. Have fun." Draco smiled obnoxiously as he took a long swig from his glass, laughed at his cruelty, and went up to his room for bed.

Yep, she walked right into that one.

000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

"Draco, pass the paper." Hermione asked a little harshly. Draco stared at her for a moment before throwing it down in front of her. The two were about to head off to breakfast, but the orange juice and toast in their kitchen seemed too welcoming to pass up. So they sat down at the counter and started to eat, while reading the prophet.

"Oh look, here we are, again." Hermione said flatly as she flipped a page.

"Perfect." Draco grinned, biting into his toast and reading a Quidditch magazine.

"Honestly, you'd think they stop talking about it by now."

"Granger it's been like a week. You'd better get used to it."

"Hopefully it won't last much longer."

"And hopefully you'll stop talking. Sucks that we don't always get what we want, doesn't it?"

"You are such a prick, Draco Malfoy. I can't stand being around you." Hermione spat, folded up the paper and began to walk out. She was fed up with his bullshit.

"Granger you can't leave." Draco rolled his eyes, closing his magazine and watching her walk around their small but cozy common room.

"And why not?" she said not looking at him, but tossing a bag over her shoulder.

"Because we need to walk together."

"Too bad we don't always get what we want." She mocked, and then walked next to the couch to grab her shoes.

"Why are you being so difficult?" Draco huffed, now running around to gather his things since he knew he wouldn't be able to stop her from leaving.

"Hmm, it wouldn't have anything to do with you being a jerk, would it?"

"I asked you." He shrugged innocently.

"See, this is exactly what I'm talking about! You can't take ONE thing seriously and the only time you will even consider doing that, there has to be something in it for you! And when you aren't acting mature, which, trust me, is a VERY common occurrence, you're throwing insults at me left and right! It's cruel and stressful and it has to stop." She shouted.

"Granger, I can't say I'm not going to fight with you, it's just how we operate. Deal."

"Screw you." She narrowed her eyes and stomped off for the door.

"But what about walking in together?" He called after her.

"We're in a fight!" she yelled back.

Merlin this man was infuriating.

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The first day of classes was unlike any other one. Hermione must have answered twenty questions about her 'honeymoon' for the gossiping girls, she yelled at 3 groups of people to sit down in class instead of crowding around her desk, and Malfoy's arm was around her waist more times than she would've liked. And most of all, her face was hurting from fake smiling so much.

Who knew being Draco Malfoy's wife was such a hard job?

Although it was probably a lot easier if she didn't despise his whole being…But still…

Hermione was happy when Ron and Harry joked with her a few times during the day, mostly making fun of Draco…though she did have to stop herself from laughing to keep reminding them ("Guys, Draco's not like that.")…but it was only for show. She really couldn't give a rat's ass if they defamed Malfoy until the sun came up.

In her last class of the day, she had double Potions, and she was sitting next to Draco. Harry and Ron were behind her and were talking about Quidditch try-outs now that Harry was the Captain again.

She looked around the room and noticed that most people's eyes were subtlety on them while they listened to Snape's lecture.

Hermione inwardly cursed that the attention was on her once more, then leaned over in her chair towards Draco, and whispered in his ear. "Pretend I said something you'd like."

He looked at her surprised, but quickly covered it up with a smirk and turned his head sideways to kiss her slowly below her ear. Hermione shuddered inwardly, his little kisses were still extremely uncomfortable, but she smiled as he winked back at her.

"Mrs.…Malfoy, I am sure you didn't hear with you being so preoccupied in your new life, but there is this new idea we are trying this year. Supposedly, when the teacher instructs, you listen. Save the frivolities for after class. 5 points from Gryffindor." Snape drawled.

Hermione instantly turned pink from embarrassment but was also angered. Did he not see Malfoy right next to her doing the same thing?

Snape turned back around and told the class to get their ingredients.

"See what happens? I try to help you and I'm the one that gets in trouble." Hermione spat.

"Should've done it in McGonagall's class." Draco smirked.

"No, she loves you now, remember?" She said meanly.

"Jealous?"

She ignored him and got up to get her things from the cabinet. When she got back, Draco already had the cauldron out.

"So what, your first public display in your life didn't go so well, there will be other times." He said, cutting up some roots.

"My first?" she asked insulted.

"Your first. The other ones were initiated by me. And aside from those staged ones, you never got any action." He confirmed.

"How dare you? You know nothing about me."

"Sure I do. It's my job as your husband...and as your enemy."

"You still don't know anything."

"Except that you've never had a first kiss."

Hermione ignored him and threw his roots into the pot.

A few moments of silence passed between the two. Nothing was heard except for the casual conversations from the other students, knives chopping, or cauldrons hissing.

"So I'm assuming you told Ginny?"

"Yes I told her on the train."

"Is she trustworthy?"

"And why wouldn't she be? You don't see me asking you about your Slytherin friends and their 'trust'."

"How do you know if I even asked a Slyth….wait, no, I'm not even going to joke like that."

"Surely you don't think your house is better than the rest."

"Oh please Granger there's no contest."

"Really?"

"Really."

Yeah, okay. If Slytherins were trustworthy then Voldemort collected bottle caps. Hermione knew that argument could and would last ages so she decided to change the subject completely.

"So, who did you tell?"

Draco looked at her for a moment as if he was unsure to tell her. But then he shrugged and said, "Blaise Zabini."

"Good."

"Good?"

"Well he's the most decent friend of yours that I can think of. He decided to stay out of the war. Smart guy."

"What are you saying?" Draco asked calmly to keep up appearances although he was feeling differently. Still, to everyone else it looked like the two were in fun and light conversation. Draco smirking and Hermione grinning slightly.

"That Zabini was a good choice."

"That's not what you were implying."

"You're too easily insulted, I wasn't implying anything."

"I'm too easily insulted? Do you know who you are?"

"Hermione Granger--"

"Malfoy."

"Not for long."

"So the extra emphasis on 'he' wasn't entailing that I made the wrong decision. Even though the decision I made ultimately helped you in the end."

"Well death is looking like a better alternative than wearing your ring."

"Excuse me, Mrs. Malfoy, but do you think you can pay attention to the task at hand?" Snape intruded.

"Sorry professor." She blushed and Snape trailed away.

"See, being near you gets me in all sorts of trouble."

"But it also kept you ali--"

"Don't finish that sentence."

00000000000000000000000000000000000

"You did WHAT!"

Is it okay to hate one's husband?

Because that's exactly what she was doing right now.

After everything he warned her about! All he told her about not kissing Harry or Ron. All he told her about being a 'good actress'. All he told her about making it 'believable'.

So what the hell did he call kissing other girls then!

"Oh please Hermione, not now." He begged, sprawled out across their couch with a pillow over his head.

"Yes, right now seems the perfect time." She snatched the pillow from across his face and continued pacing in front of him.

"Do you know what you did Draco? You kissed someone else! How could you do that! You are such a bloody hypocrite!"

"It was an accident" he drawled with his eyes closed. "Trust me, I would have never kissed her willingly."

"You're going to ruin everything! You stated in our agreement, no-"

"No sex partners inside of school. We didn't have sex."

"Yeah but you were going to."

"Didn't I stop it?"

"Yes but only because you probably realized I would have a talk with you when you got back. That's the only thing that brought you back to your senses."

"You call this a talk? I call it my wife screaming at me like a fucking wildebeest."

"But Draco, what were you thinking? I mean, do you know what could happen now?"

"Hermione, YOU try being piss drunk with other random drunk girls throwing themselves at anything that walks."

"I would never be in that situation!"

He scoffed. "I know."

"No, not as in ever, but not now! Because of us! Our agreement! You should be suffering con-….wait…why aren't you suffering any consequences?"

"I don't know….it's late. I'm honestly too hung-over to think of anything. My head is pounding and it hurts to even speak. Oh yeah, and you fucking scolding me isn't helping." He spat, taking another pillow and closing it over his eyes.

"I can't even believe you went to that party! I WARNED you not to go-"

"And I told you to come with me."

"We had Head Duties!"

"Honestly Hermione, between walking around the halls and meeting…I don't know, maybe two other life forms and going to a house party…what do you think I'd choose?"

"-But you had responsibilities! Ugh, I knew Todd would be so much better at this than you….and who the heck throws 'back to school' parties anyway?"

"You'd be surprised."

"-End of the year parties I understand, but the second day of classes are tomorrow and half the Slytherins are going to be walking around like zombies. And since you decided to go kissing other girls-"

"Girl. Singular, as in one."

"-now, people are going to know this is fake! And all the painful time I've spent with you will count for nothing. All because you went partying."

"Granger calm down, you're rambling. It was one party. One girl. In some closet. No one saw us leave together, the secret's still safe."

"What kind of decent girl would go with a married man in a closet alone?"

He scoffed. "Anyone."

"Well. Who was the lucky little bimbo that got to you first?"

"Um…That…red-head. Weasley girl I think-"

"GINNY?"

"Oww…."

"MY Ginny?"

"No. Mine."

"How could she do this of all people? I told her- Wait! THAT explains why you didn't get punished by the spell…because I already told her about us so the secret wouldn't be threatened in any way! If she saw you cheating...well, helped you cheat, it wouldn't matter. But still! How irresponsible. I mean, she knows I hate you, but she also knows that she could ruin this for the both of us! I need to speak with her about her carelessness--"

"Wait. Don't go wasting your breath. She's knocked out. I don't even think she remembers hooking up with me…I think she called me like, Potter or someone."

"So great, I can place all the blame on you." She started again.

"Granger….I'm all for more yelling but, please, could you do it tomorrow afternoon? I think I'm dying now." He pleaded with his eyes shut tightly.

"I have no sympathy for you. I'm only stopping because you gave me a headache. You'd better hope, Draco Malfoy, that no one saw you." Hermione took the pillow and whacked him in the back of the head with it, ignored his cry of "Bitch!", took a shower and headed to sleep.

Draco sat on the couch, head pounding, thinking of everything that just happened now and at that party….

…oops