Sometimes I see the hate
Reflecting in their eyes
It saddens me to think
No-one'd care if I died
And now I'm pressured to be the one
Who brightens up their day
Why can't I ever be depressed?
Why do I even stay?
Simply because there's nowhere to go
I'd be so alone and scared
I'd hate to even live
Knowing their hateful stares
And I've come to love the enemy
And how useful they make me feel
And when I'm bound and thrown in a room
I can finally be real
I consider refusing to go on home
To living the normal lie
Acting normal and happy
While slowly I die inside
I hate myself and who I've become.
I hate this situation I'm in. I despise being the cheerleader in this group; I have to be so perky all the time. I have to be something I'm not. And the whole thing makes me feel so damn useless, knowing the group could go on like nothing had happened if I left. I don't even understand why they want to rescue me when I'm in danger. Likely civil duty or some shit like that. But I've come to love the enemies. They make me feel useful. When they kidnap me, they need me. Being needed is something we all long to feel. As much as I screamed when Malik kidnapped me, I could show how I really felt…..
Reviewer Responses:
Alex of the Shadows: Thank you so much! I really apprieciate the fact that you've reviewed every chapter so far, and I'm glad you enjoy my writings. And just so ya know, you've been right on every one so far.