This chapter was written in a rush so excuse the poor quality please. I will try and post VERY soon to make up for it.
Chapter 11
Contemplations, butterflies and heart to hearts
James awoke the next morning groggily. He rubbed hi eyes and wondered why he was feeling so terrible. It hit him like a flash, Lily.
Lately Lily had been confusing him more than ever. He wondered if it would be better if he wasn't in love with her.
"Prongs!" Sirius called. "Prongs, haul yourself out of bed. We and when I say we I mean you are going to fix the mess you have made."
James pulled the blanket over his head and groaned. He wasn't getting up. It would be easier to stay in bed for all of eternity.
"Prongs! Don't forget…It's the Marauders butterfly hunt today!" James sat up straight.
Every year on the first Sunday back after the Christmas holidays was the infamous Marauders butterfly hunt. Lily released 1003 butterflies at exactly 11.13am and the Marauder who had caught the most by 8.07 that night was declared the winner. Sirius had won almost every year and he was always the most excited out of the four boys.
"It's 11.03! Why didn't you wake me earlier!" James complained as he hurriedly changed. "What are you wearing?"
Sirius was decked out in camouflage gear, with a huge sombrero and he was wearing red face paint.
"Well…the camouflage gear is so I can be undetected and the sombrero is for any foreign butterflies. Of course the face paint is for Gryffindor colours and the tap shoes are just for good measure. James looked at his feet. He hadn't even noticed those.
The two boys hurried to the Quidditch pitch. Lily stood in the middle beside a clear container holding the creatures. Remus and Peter were ready with their nets and Abby was in the stands with her camera. A lot of other people had turned up for the releasing of the butterflies.
"Ready boys? It's almost time." Lily grinned. James noted that it wasn't as real as her normal smile and she looked a little tired.
"Remember the Butterflies have a zoning charm on so they cannot leave Hogwarts grounds. This year I have transfigured the butterflies to have a certain device which allows me to know they are authentic, when you capture a game butterfly a point will automatically appear on my scorecard. We wouldn't want a repeat of last year's event in which a record 423 057 butterflies were mysteriously caught on top of the usual 1003. Also NO using magic on the butterflies." She looked pointedly at Sirius.
"Ready?" She checked her magical watch.
"On your marks…get set…go!" She cried as she pulled the hatch back. The butterflies flew out of the top in a marvellous pattern that awed many of the girls watching. The Marauders took off after them.
James ran to the broom shed, rather than try a summoning charm, and retrieved a broom. He mounted it and kicked off. He saw Sirius had done the same while Peter stayed on the ground running after the butterflies and Remus headed to the top of the stands.
He took once glance at Lily, who was watching Sirius purposely looking away from him, and kicked off into the air. He flew after a cluster of winged beauties as they made their way over to the stands. He swooped in with his net outstretched and chased after the, Just as they nearer Remus, who was waiting patiently for them to fly unsuspectingly into his net, he shot forward and swooped them up from behind. He grin teasingly at Remus and flew past him. He saw that the majority of the butterflies had flown through open windows into Hogwarts and landed on the ground. The other Marauders had been thinking the same thing as they all ran up to the castle.
The crowd went back to their normal routine. It was going to be a long day.
SCENE CHANGE
By two o'clock the students of Hogwarts had been confined to their common rooms for fear of being trampled by Marauders on the hunt. They had been prowling all day, except a few stops to the kitchens, and there were still many butterflies on the loose.
Lily had been sitting in the common room for most of the day watching the scores magically change. She was the only who knew the scores so many people tried to peak over her shoulder. Every now and then a Marauder, usually Peter, would scamper into the common room and check for butterflies then scamper out. After the seventeenth time Peter came in everyone else cleared out so they were not in his way.
"Hey Lily." Abby plopped beside her. Lily stuffed the scorecard into her pocket.
"Hi." She said in an overly cheery manner.
"What? What's wrong?" Abby scrutinised her face.
"What? Nothing." Lily looked at her feet.
"You're really sad about James huh?" Abby asked sympathetically.
"No." Abby looked at her. "Maybe just a little."
"Lily…" Abby started.
"No, Stop. I know what you're going to say, 'He likes you, really' blah, blah, blah." Lily stood up. "I've heard it all before. Spare me. If he liked me I would know. If he liked me he wouldn't be going out with that girl next weekend. If he liked me then I wouldn't feel as though my heart was being ripped out. But I do. Because he doesn't like me." Abby made to interrupt but Lily held her hand up to stop her. "It's me fault, really. I was stupid falling for him. I was stupid falling in love with my best friend when it's obvious he'll never feel the same. I was stupid and…" Lily sniffed. "I hate myself for it." Lily ran upstairs to her dorm.
Abby leaned her head back, closed her eyes and sighed. She was going to have a word with that boy.
"Hello? Anyone home?" She opened her eyes to see Remus looking down at her. She jumped up and flushed. Remus chuckled lightly, he saw Alice Landers walk by and felt a little…guilty?
"Hi, Remus. Just resting my eyes. You know, the woes of teenage romance."
"Lily?" He asked, sitting down.
"Lily. I don't know what to do…she's just so upset." She sat beside him and lay her head on his chest. He stroked her hair.
"It will all work out…it just takes time."
"That's just it. If they continue like this I don't know if it will work out. I don't know Remus…what if we did the wrong thing in trying to get them together. I mean, look what it has gotten us so far." Remus sighed.
"There's nothing we can do about it now."
"I know, but it was so much easier when they didn't feel like this about each other."
"Love is complicated." He provided.
"I know. I know." She sighed deeply. "Shouldn't you be hunting butterflies?"
"I was just taking a break. I best get back to it now." He stood up. "Don't worry Abby, it will all work out for the best in the end."
"Bye…" She whispered softly.
What was she going to do with Lily?
SCENE CHANGE
James wandered aimlessly throughout the halls. He had already caught many butterflies. He was desperately avoiding his purple haired stalker who seemed to have a tracking device on him. Every now and then he would spy a butterfly lurking and he would quietly sneak up and capture it or devise a plan to get it. Occasionally he would see Sirius speed past running like a lunatic. Sometimes Peter or Remus would go by and frequently he would pass students who wished him luck.
The one person he didn't see was the red head who had been occupying his thoughts. The very red head while usually helped him in his quest and ran behind him cheering or ran in front of him scaring the butterflies towards him. He wondered where Lily had gone off to. He wondered what he had done. Most of all he wondered if she was thinking of him.
He spied a butterfly hovering ahead of him and he hid behind a suit of armour. As the butterfly floated past he dived at it and captured it.
One more point. One more point.
SCENE CHANGE
By Dinner time a large majority or the butterflies were just tallies on the magical scoreboard. By Dinner time most of the students of Hogwarts were tired of sitting in their dorms all day. By Dinner time the Marauders were just more pepped up than ever and ready to roll.
Lily and Abby made way to the great hall when Sirius zipped past them.
"Sirius?" Lily called.
"There's a butterfly in the great hall. I'm on it." Sirius whizzed off with his butterfly net in hand. He burst through the great hall doors and spied it. He quickly jumped on top of the Hufflepuff table and ran across it. He knocked dishes of potatoes and bowls of peaches to the ground. A few girls shrieked as their lunches were flung at them by the wreckless boy tipped plates in his hunt.
He reached the end of the table and stood motionless. Everyone watched him in silence. He slowly raised his butterfly net and stared at the butterfly. He slowly bent his knees and crouched. Swiftly he leapt of the table with the net outstretched. His war cry bounced off of the walls and a few people cringed. He lay sprawled out on the floor with his net pressed tightly to the ground. He sat up and slid it over so his prize didn't escape. He looked slowly so he could look at the beauty he had caught,
"NOOOOO!" He screamed. He flipped over the net to reveal it empty. The butterfly hovered barely above his head. "Damn you." He cursed. He sprung up and turned to the hall and addressed everyone, "Don't worry, I've got him." He threw his net at him. "Crap! That just made him mad!" He quickly turned on his heel and ran as the butterfly floated aimlessly behind the wailing boy.
As Sirius bound around the room like mad man Remus recalled something he had come across in a book.
'…1 in every 200 people are a psychopath and they look just like everyone else…' There were a lot more than 200 hundred people in Hogwarts did that mean someone was a psychopath? He eyed Sirius suspiciously. Possibly.
SCENE CHANGE
"3…2…1…STOP!" Lily cried. She tapped scored card three times with her wand and a long wailing sound was heard. Almost immediately the four Marauders charged through the portrait hole and scrambled over to where Lily was standing. Lily looked at the scorecard and was slightly surprised.
"The time has come." She began. "It is 8.07 and I have the scores right here." She held the scorecard up.
"And?" Abby urged. Lily hadn't told her who won. Lily ignored her.
"This is the LAST year of the butterfly hunt at Hogwarts. The LAST year. The very LAST."
"And?" Everyone demanded.
"I mean it will never happen here again. NEVER. Sure…we may have it somewhere else but it won't be the same. It is-"
"Lily." James pleaded.
"Fine." She sighed. "Just for you." She smiled weakly. James grinned.
"Engorgio." She spoke clearly while tapping the scorecard. The score card grew and everyone gasped, except Sirius who started dancing.
"I won, I won, and I won!" He chanted putting his butt into action and doing a few pelvic thrusts.
"I…lost?" James gaped. "I came DEAD LAST!" He wailed. "LAST! I've NEVER BEEN LAST!"
"I…came second." Peter said weakly.
Indeed it was true. James, who was without his traditional luck charm and had a head full of murky thoughts, had come last.
Remus, who had stopped for a chat with Abby and afterwards been contemplating something unexpected in his plan to get Sirius and Abby together, had come third.
Peter, who had done as usual, had come second. And Sirius, who had been happy-go-lucky and had nothing but butterflies on his mind, had come first…again.
Sirius was dancing around the common room and kissing random females and James sat on the couch with his head in hands.
"James…it's ok." Lily said lightly sitting beside him. She patted his back.
"Last?" He said through his hands. "Last? I never come last at this game. PETER beat me. PETER."
"Come here." She put her arms around him. She smiled at the warmth he gave off. He dropped his hands into his lap.
"Where were you today?" He asked softly. "You usually come with me."
"I was…busy."
"Oh." He said disappointed. "Oh." He repeated dumbly. "Ok."
"Sorry."
"Don't worry about it. Just promise me when we do it again after Hogwarts you'll come with me."
"Of course, Jamsie." She said brightening.
"Thank you."
"Don't worry about it. Now…what's next in Operation Burgundy Fox? We haven't worked on it in a while…"
"Well Turkey, I was thinking…" He smiled. Things were back to normal. I'm so glad she's not mad at me.
SCENE CHANGE
"Now students, I would like to announce a visitor to the school for a few days." Professor Dumbledore stood up at Dinner the next night. "She will be looking for people suitable for the 'Auror recruitment programme' at the Ministry." He smiled happily. "Please give a warm welcome to Mrs Malfoy."
The school clapped politely as a sour looking woman stood. She had fair hair, pulled into a tight bun, oval glasses and a very proper atmosphere about her.
"Now after the feast will the head students please join me in my office. As per usual with guests they will be showing them around the school. Now you may eat."
Lily groaned and put her head in her hands. "Damn."
"What?" Peter asked.
"I have to show her around. I bet she knows about me beating up her son."
"I'm sure she won't remember you." Abby tried.
"I jumped off a broom and beat up her son. How many girls do that?"
"I guess…" Abby trailed off.
"I bet she remembers me as the girl who jumped off a broom and pummelled her son."
"Yes…I suppose that would be hard to forget." James agreed.
SCENE CHANGE
Knock. Knock.
"Come in." Professor Dumbledore called.
Lily and James walked in quietly.
"Ah yes, Miss Evans, Mr Potter. Mrs Malfoy was just showing me a picture of her beautiful children." He smiled.
"May I have a look?" Lily asked gently. She was trying to make a good impression on the woman.
Mrs Malfoy held out a picture to her with another unpleasant look.
"Why hello, Mrs Malfoy. I'm James Potter." He bowed lavishly. The lady stared icily at him. "Well, I see where your son gets his stare from."
Lily looked at the picture. It was of Lucius Malfoy kneeling down, who was about a year younger, and two young blonde children. Lucius looked rather bitter and the two children were patting his slick hair giggling. Occasionally one of the children would pinch his leg and he would scowl.
"Wow, those are gorgeous boys." Lily smiled pointing at the picture.
"One is a girl." James whispered; he was looking at the picture over her shoulder. Lily blushed.
"Oh…er…of course. I was kidding…ha ha…" She laughed nervously. "But I can tell you, that little girl is going to be a heartbreaker." She pointed at the blonde child.
"That's the boy." James whispered again, chuckling at her mistake. Oops.
Mrs Malfoy leered and snatched the picture back. Dumbledore was smiling slightly and he walked to the door.
"Now…to the grand tour…"
SCENE CHANGE
"I'm so stupid." Lily said as she banged her head against a table in the common room.
"It wasn't that bad." James offered.
"It wasn't that bad?" She asked shrilly. "Apart from calling her little girl a boy and then the boy a girl, she obviously knows I was the girl who hurt her son and then on the tour I kept making jokes about Slytherins for the first 20 minutes until I remembered that her son is a Slytherin and his whole family has been since FOREVER. Then when we passed Pinxter she commented that she was glad I was wearing all my clothes today, stupid evil hag. Oh and let's not forget the numerous times I tripped and stumbled looking like a fool or the BIG time that I fell and too her with me, along with the other half a dozen people around us. That's just the beginning."
"Lily, who cares if she doesn't like you?" Abby asked.
"I do. She works at the Ministry! She could have influence over my future job!" Lily wailed.
"I'm sure that won't happen."
"I've wanted to be an Auror since I was 13!"
"What does that have to do with her not liking you?" Remus asked.
"She's a Malfoy. Since when were they fair?"
"That won't-" Remus was cut off by Sirius.
"By Golly, she's right! Malfoys' are evil, spiteful gits! Lily we have to get you to make a good impression!"
"We'll help you Lily. Don't worry, what are friends for?" James smiled at her.
"Thanks James." She grinned. The others rolled their eyes and snickered.
SCENE CHANGE
"Good Morning, Mrs Malfoy." Lily smiled. She sniffed in reply. James frowned.
"I believe Lily said good morning to you, Mrs Malfoy. It would only be proper to reply with the same." Mrs Malfoy glared at him and walked off.
"James, you don't have to do that."
"Yes, I do. She shouldn't be so rude." James glowered.
SCENE CHANGE
Mrs Malfoy continued to be rude and standoffish to Lily for the next two days. When Lily would talk she would turn away or sniff daintily. When Lily would greet her she would sneer. When Lily would smile she would scowl. When Lily would walk by she would frown.
James was getting angry at the evil woman who kept making Lily sad. As it was it was her last day at Hogwarts and Lily was worried that she would never be an Auror.
"She hates me, so I will never be an Auror. She will tell all he Auror hiring friends and they will never let me join." Lily groaned.
"Now, now. I'm sure Mrs Malfoy has no friends." Sirius soothed. Lily groaned. Abby glared at him.
"What he means is, I'm sure that won't happen."
"Here she comes." Peter whispered.
"Hello, Mrs Malfoy. I hope you've had a splendid day." Lily smiled brightly. Mrs Malfoy just held her head higher and walked by at a quicker pace.
Lily sighed. "What's the point?" James watched as Lily sadly shuffled her feet. He looked after Mrs Malfoy and made a quick decision. He ran after her and grabbed her arm. She turned around.
"Excuse me," he began. "I would like to have a word with you. My friend Lily has been nothing but perfectly nice and warm to you ever since you have been her and you have been nothing but blatantly rude and mean to her. He has overlooked your icy demeanour and hateful looks and been polite to you. Many people would have given up but Lily is a determined and wonderful person. She is a passionate, caring and strong person and you would be lucky to have her as part of your Auror control programme. Lily is the best person I have ever met and if you can't see that then I feel sorry for you." He finished with his eyes blazing. Mrs Malfoy stepped back a little and shook him off of her.
"Listen Potter, I don't know why you care about the filthy Mudblood but apparently you do. I may have over looked your muggle loving ways and considered recommending you but today you have proven you have little respect for authority and the fact that you kiss the ground that Mudblood walks on knocks you down a few points." She spoke in a deadly tone. "I don't know why Dumbledore picked such idiots to be head of school but I will attribute it to his old age."
"Listen Here, Malfoy." James spat. "You can say what you want about me but never speak about Dumbledore like that and never ever speak about Lily like that. Ever. You are a despicable woman and if this is what it is like to be in your programme then you can shove it up your arse."
"I will personally make sure you and your little Mudblood girlfriend will never be in my programme." She glared.
"I wouldn't be in your programme if you paid me." Mrs Malfoy glowered for a moment or two before turning on her heel and marching swiftly down the corridor.
James turned around to meet the stare of all of his friends, Lily included. She looked from him to where Mrs Malfoy had been and she turned and ran.
"Great." James sighed. "Now Lily won't be an Auror and she will hate me."
"Not necessarily, Mr Potter." He turned and saw Professor Dumbledore.
"What do you mean, Professor?"
"I mean that Mrs Malfoy is one of many Auror scouts we have organised to visit Hogwarts this year, I assure you that Miss Evans will be accepted into an Auror programme, she will be great, as will you."
"Are you sure?" Dumbledore nodded. "That's great!" Dumbledore walked away.
"James…what you said to Mrs Malfoy could have gotten you into a lot of trouble…" Abby started. "But it was so sweet and if Lily doesn't realise that you like her then she's blind."
"You think she knows?" James asked nervously.
"No." Abby sighed. "No, I don't."
"Good." He ran off after her.
SCENE CHANGE
"Lily! Lily! I'm sorry. I didn't mean for you to not be accepted to the programme. I really was trying to help you. I just couldn't stand that woman being so mean to you." He said to her. She was lying, face forward, on the couch and he was standing over her. "Say something, please? You can yell at me if you want."
Lily sat up and lunged at him. She wrapped her arms around him in a hug and smiled gleefully. "Thank you, thank you, thank you. That was the nicest thing ever. Of course I'm not going to yell at you. You're my little, Jamsie."
"Really?" He smiled, his heart lifting,
"Yes. I'm so happy that someone cars enough to say that sort of thing to someone for me."
"Hey, I'd do it again in a heart beat." He sighed.
SCENE CHANGE
"Remus?" Remus jumped a little. "Are you okay?" Lily asked suspiciously.
It was Thursday night, just before dinner, and Lily had seen Remus sitting by the lake. A few people were sitting around the other edge of the lake talking and laughing.
"Yes…I'm fine." But the little hesitation in his words told her that wasn't so.
"Remus, don't lie to me."
"Fine, I'm not fine.
"What's wrong?"
"Just…things…
"Now, now Remus, you must get sick of always being the wise one. Tell Lily all your problems."
"You see…um…well…there's this girl…"
"Girl?" Lily asked curiously.
"Yes and I think I like her."
"You do?" Lily asked shocked. "But…you don't get caught up in girls."
"I know." He sighed. "I'm so stupid."
"You're not stupid. I'm sure she will like you."
"No. There's a problem."
"What? Your lycanthropy?"
"Yes!" He said quickly.
"Remus…I can't say I'm sure it won't be a problem but if she's the right girl she will get over it. It may come as a shock but if she's worth it then she won't care."
"Maybe…" He sighed. "It's too complicated."
"Just out of interest…who is it?" Lily asked. He looked to where Alice and a Ravenclaw girl were talking with Sirius.
"No one important."
"Ah…I see."
SCENE CHANGE
"You know…Remus has been acting strange lately." James said.
"I know, it's not even that time of the month." Lily agreed. They were sitting in the Boys dorms on Sirius' bed.
"I haven't even talked to him much lately." Sirius said.
"Here he is."
"Hey Remus."
"Hi." He smiled. "Where Abby and Peter?"
"Abby is in the Library and Peter is in the Kitchen." Lily answered.
"And Sirius passed up the opportunity for food?" Remus chuckled.
"Hey!" Sirius pouted. "I'll have you know that I have a healthy appetite. And besides all the girls love this sexy body."
"Hmm." Remus nodded. "Well…I've got to go and do my transfiguration assignment."
"Wait…me too. I'll go with you." Lily jumped up.
"Don't think I haven't noticed your mood change too. What's wrong with you?" Sirius asked.
"It's Friday." He said glumly.
"And?"
"Tomorrow's Saturday."
"So?"
"I have to take that girl to Hogsmeade."
"Listen." Sirius said sternly. "You got yourself into this. You have to tell Lily the truth. You have to."
"It's not that easy."
"Sure it is 'Hey Lily, I love you', and that's it. Ok, maybe you shouldn't say it like that but you should say something."
"But if I say something and she doesn't feel the same way, which she doesn't, it will be awkward between us. I could ruin our whole friendship just because I had to go and fall in love. I'm not willing to risk that. My friendship with Lily is more important that anything." James put a pillow over his head.
"But what if you could have more? What if you could have the greatest relationship ever?" Sirius said loudly. He stood up, he wasn't good with this kind of stuff and he was loosing his patience. "What if you never tell her and then one day, ten years from now, you'll be alone and she'll be with her husband and then you'll realise that you made the biggest mistake of your life by not telling her. What if it turned out that she had liked you back then but because you never said anything she got over it and moved on. What if you spent the rest of your life wondering what could have been if only you told her and she spent the rest of her life with her husband, that's not you, in her house living a wonderful life?" James stood up and looked Sirius in the eye.
"What if? What if?" He yelled. "What if I tell her and she laughs? What if I tell her and she just looks at me with her emerald eyes full of pity? What if we grow apart slowly because it's awkward between us? What if finally, after a long time of drifting apart, we just stop talking all together? What if I loose the best thing ever and then one day when I'm looking over my photo album I see a red head girl sitting in all of my pictures and she's smiling and she's happy and then all of a sudden I turn the page and she's gone? What if somewhere in the world she's looking at her photo album too and she sees me but she doesn't remember? What if she bumps into me on the street and she doesn't recognise me? What if she forgets me? What will I do without her?" James demanded.
"YOU HAVE TO LEARN TO TAKE A RISK!" Sirius yelled.
"I CAN'T! I can't risk loosing her! You don't understand! I just can't!" James scrunched his eyes closed. "Ever since the day I met her I have woken up every morning and looked forward to seeing Lily. Every damn day. She makes it all ok. She's there for me, just like you are. I'm not willing to loose her just because I had to go soft and fall in love with her."
"CAN'T YOU SEE WHAT YOU'RE DOING?" Sirius yelled. He was just damn angry at his friend for being so damn blind. "YOU NEED TO TELL HER! YOU'RE BEING SO STUPID!"
"AREN'T YOU LISTENING!" James screamed in his face. "I CAN'T TELL HER! I love her too much to loose her and I can't ruin our friendship like that!"
"Maybe you're right." Sirius took a deep breath and spoke calmly. "If you tell her and she doesn't feel the same or you try get together and it doesn't work out you risk ruining the best friendship ever." Sirius sighed and walked to the door. "Or you could get everything you've ever wanted and be the happiest you've ever been." With that he walked out and shut the door gently.
SCENE CHANGE
"Remus?" Lily asked as they were walking to the library. "Do you want to talk about Alice?"
"What?" Remus asked confused.
"Do you want to talk about the girl you like?"
"I don't like her." He denied.
"I'm not stupid. You should tell her."
"You're one to talk." He snapped.
"What?" She asked.
"I said 'you're one to talk'."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, that you shouldn't be telling me to tell the girl I like when you're keeping your feelings for James a secret and your damn well in love with him." He said angrily.
"I don't like James." She blushed.
"Liar." He wasn't in the mood for this.
"I don't."
"You should tell him, you know. The greatest thing is to love and be loved in return." Remus sighed.
"I don't love him and he doesn't love me." Lily said sternly.
"Lily, to quote you 'I'm not stupid.'" He stopped and she did too.
"What is wrong with you today?" She demanded.
"I'm confused." He said weakly.
"Remus? Remus Lupin? Remus Lupin, not the picture of calm? Remus J. Lupin confused? What is the world coming to?"
"Shut up. You won't admit your problems, so neither will I."
"I don't like him." She said furiously.
"Who said I was talking about that?" He walked off.
SCENE CHANGE
Abby and Peter sat at dinner that night surrounded by a tense silence and four very angry people.
"Pass the potatoes?" Peter asked. Lily and Remus, who had been glaring at each other, turned and glared at him. James, who had been staring at his plate, and Sirius, who was stabbing his meat, glared at him also.
"Never mind, I'll get them myself." He squeaked.
"Who spiked their Pumpkin juice?" Abby asked him quietly.
SCENE CHANGE
"Jamsie, are you listening to me?" James snapped his head up at the familiar nickname. Sadly, it was not Lily but the girl he was on a date with. He had found out her name was Rebecca but pretty much zoned out after that.
"Yes."
"Ok, so I told Brittany that and she was like 'Oh My God!' and so I was like…" And James just couldn't listen anymore so he stared into space and wondered what Lily was doing right that second.
SCENE CHANGE
"Remus, I'm sorry that I was so rude to you yesterday." Lily said quickly. "I was just so caught up. You're right, I shouldn't judge you when I'm just the same. I like James." Remus smiled.
"I'm sorry too. I knew you liked him anyway."
"Well at least you can read signals. James just interprets my 'l like you' signals as 'go out with that other girl' signals. He's so blind." He's not the only one, Remus thought dryly.
"That's today, huh?" Remus asked.
"Yeah. Why did I have to fall in love with my best friend?" She sighed and leaned against him.
"I don't know."
Lily, for reasons she put down to as bottled up emotions and stress, suddenly started to cry.
Remus allowed to her weep softly into his shirt and shooed anyone away who would come close. Her heart was breaking and he would have to talk to James about it, and soon. She cried for a very long time before falling asleep. Remus just sat there, thinking. At 5.30 she woke up and sniffed.
"I'm sorry, Remus." She sighed. He lip was quivering again.
"Hey, hey. It's alright. You go ahead and cry, you've had a tough time and you've kept it inside, just let it out." Lily tried to hold back the oncoming tears but as Remus spoke so wisely she felt herself drift into a state of vulnerability and there was nothing she could do to stop the tears that started flowing. She leaned back into Remus and started crying again. He patted her hair and soothed her with kind words and a weak smile.
SCENE CHANGE
"Night, Jamsie. See you tomorrow." She smacked her gum and skipped off merrily. James groaned and leaned against the wall.
"Didn't go so well?" Peter asked.
"No."
"Probably because she's not Lily."
"Does everyone know I like her?" James asked, throwing his hands up.
"Everyone but her, yeah."
"This sucks."
"Life sucks." Sirius said from behind him. He nodded to Peter and he scampered off. "I'm sorry for last night. I was angry at you for being so stubborn."
"Me too." James agreed. They started up to Gryffindor tower.
"Tough night?" Sirius asked.
"You bet. It's just after 5.30 and I feel like going to bed already."
"You really should tell her you know."
"I know. Maybe I will, some day." James scuffed his feet.
"What's it like?"
"Amazing. Every time I'm near her I get this…incredible…feeling that leaves me gasping for breath and I can't drown it out. More importantly, I don't want to drown it out."
"Hmm…"
"Password?" The portrait asked.
"Mahogany Hocksock." Sirius supplied.
"It's just-" James stopped.
"What?" Sirius asked. He turned. "Oh."
James' face fell. Remus was comforting Lily. His Lily. His Lily was crying and he didn't even know why and he wasn't even comforting her.
"I'm sure it's nothing." Sirius said, noticing the hurt look on James' face.
"I know…it's just I'm usually the one whose shoulder Lily cries on."
"It's probably because you weren't here."
"Yeah. Maybe." He said glumly.
"Hey." Remus said noticing them. Lily jumped, startled, and looked up. She took one look at the company and stood up. She wiped her eyes and brushed passed them, upstairs to her dorm.
"She didn't even say goodnight." James sighed.
"She's just upset." Remus supplied.
"What about?" James asked sharply.
"Family things." Remus said. He had to figure out on his own.
He better hurry.