Feast on Part V! Oh, but don't feast too long, here's some author/reader responses!

Vera-chan aka Arwen: Okay... I'm bowing... here's the next Part. Part IV was called "A New Hope (No, Wait, That's Star Wars!)" because it was the fourth one, it was in Roman Numerals (like Star Wars), and I couldn't think of a witty title for it :P

AnimeDutchess: Well, I hope you get your nose out of Book Six long enough to read this chapter:P Of course, I finished the book in a total of 5 hours and 37 minutes... and NOBODY FORGET IT:P

NOTE: This chapter took so long because 1) I was reading HP6, 2) I hurt my back, 3) I just felt really un-humorous, and 4) I lost the little plan thing for it - yes, despite this fic's randomness,I do have some plan of the plot :P

The Crazies and the Loonies and the... Other Crazies

Part V - A Little Interlude To Give The Author Some Time To Think

A/N: This was originally a script-type chapter (the only one in the story), but the site doesn't allow that, so this chapter may be a bit weak compared to the others. It's kind of a supernatural chapter, so keep in mind: Bold text is what the author writes. In the original text, Riku's text was constantly underlined, and there is a joke in here pertaining to that. So that's what it means. Oh, and when the Deranged Fangirls say each other's names... I used their nicknames for that, not their real names. Privacy is happiness. Or something like that.

Sora and Riku were again summoned by the strange voice in the alternate universe...

"Isn't this that place where I was summoned to Castle Oblivion?" Riku said.

"Shut up, Riku!" Sora exclaimed. "Some of the people who read this may not have played Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories!"

"Are you talking to me through my computer?" the author panicked.

"Well, duh!" Sora said.

"How else?" asked Riku.

"Uh..."

"Is that all you can say?" Sora exclaimed.

"Uh?" quoted Riku.

Okaay... let's try this again. Sora and Riku were again summoned by the strange voice in the alternate universe...

"I wanna talk! WA!" Sora cried.

"Sora, is it time for your nappie?" Riku asked shrewdly.

"Er... uh... well, uh... yeah," Sora stammered.

"Sora! Take your nappie!" Riku ordered.

"You two are much stranger than in the FanFic..." the author noted.

"Well, you made us like this," Riku pointed out.

"What are you talking about?" the author panicked.

"YOU wrote us," Sora pointed out.

"No... the ones that wrote you were those people... you know, in... in Japan," the author stammered weakly.

"Yes, but you made us like this!" Riku and Sora exclaimed simultaneously. "Hey, stop saying things exactly when I say them!"

"W- waitaminute," the author mumbled. "Are you saying that... you're crazy and loony and... other crazy?"

"Well, doi," Riku said.

"That's the title, right?" Sora asked.

"Yes, Sora, that's the title."

"Yay!" Sora exclaimed. "I was afraid I was in that scary girl's fanfic... what'shername... Deranged Fangirl Number... one? or two?"

"HEY! THOSE ARE MY FRIENDS!" the author said, enraged.

"Lemme guess," Riku said. "The bran cereal is your friend, too?"

"Uh... yes..." the author mumbled.

"Oh, puh-lease," Riku puh-lease-ed.

"Just... just be quiet." The author put on his headphones and began playing loud music.

"LISTEN TO ME!" Riku screamed. "YOU HAVE BECOME PART OF THIS FIC! YOU ARE DOOMED TO OUR FATE! Help me, Sora!"

"I like cats," Sora said.

"CATS?" Riku yelled. "We're on strike and the only thing you can think about is cats?"

"I like cats, too!" the author exclaimed.

"AGH!" Riku sighed. "I'm going to my trailer."

"You don't have a trailer," the author said smugly.

"Well, maybe if you'd write me one..."

"Not a chance."

Sora reentered the conversation. "I like cats."

"SHUT UP, SORA!" Riku yelled.

"I like... eggs," Sora said.

"AGH! SHUT UP, SORA!" Riku slapped Sora upside the head.

"I don't know what that was, but it sounded hollow," the author said. "Did you, Riku, slap you, Sora, upside the head?"

"Yeah, so?" Riku asked.

"Hello," Sora said. "I'm Flo, and I'll be your waitress this morning. What would you like?"

"I thought your name was Sora," the author said, confused.

"Well, yeah," Sora said ditzily, "but I'm saving that for my princess name: Sora Vablinksy!"

"..." both Riku and the author murmured. "Uh..."

"If I'm ever a rapper," Sora said, "I think my rappername will be P. Dudley!"

"That's Harry's cousin's name... except for the P," the author said, horrified.

"Yeah!" Sora exclaimed. "P. Dudley in the house! Yo, yo, yo, jo rock da roof off!"

"Eh... what?" the author asked, horrified.

"Yo, do I have to spell dis out? Yo, yo, yo, jo rock da roof off!"

"Riku... save me," the author commanded, horrified.

"From what, yo yo yo?" Riku rapped. "R. E. Kuku in da house!"

"Please, let me only be dreaming..." the author murmured, horrified.

"DREAMIN'?" Riku and Sora rapped. "Why j00 wanna stop da rappa vibe?"

"I have come to save you!" a voice exclaimed.

"Who are you?" the author asked, desperate.

"I am the great, the kind, the super, the one, the only, the-"

"Kimmie, shut up," another voice said, which sounded like D.J. from Full House (courtesy of Warner Bros. Television Distribution and Lorimar Television).

"Kimmie Gibler?" the author aske.d

"IT'S GIBBLER!" Kimmie yelled angrily. "G-I-double B-L-E-R!"

"She's a bit sensitive about that," D.J. explained.

"NO, I'M NOT, D.J.!"

"Waitaminute," the author murmured. "If you two are here, that means that the world border (and I mean border, not order) has been broken..."

"YAY! WE'RE FREE!" Deranged Fangirl Number One said.

"Kyo, don't get too excited," Deranged Fangirl Number Two replied.

"Don't be such a tightwad, Sigma! ...Hey, is that Regis Philbin?" asked Deranged Fangirl Number One.

"No, it's Riku," Deranged Fangirl Number Two said underangedly.

"REALLY?" Deranged Fangirl Number One exclaimed excitedly.

"Of course not, I'm joking," Deranged Fangirl Number Two chuckled.

"YOU SHOULD NEVER JOKE ABOUT THAT!" yelled Deranged Fangirl Number One angrily.

"Hey, look! It's RIIIIIIIIKU behind you!" said Deranged Fangirl Number Two derangedly.

"Yeah, like I'm falling for that again," Deranged Fangirl Number One said, unconvinced.

"Hey," Riku said simply.

Deranged Fangirl Number One shrieked: "DID I JUST HEAR THE BEST UNDERLINED VOICE IN THE WORLD? SIG, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THAT RIKU WAS BEHIND ME? DON'T RUN OFF LIKE THAT WITH THE GUY I LIKE! YOU HAVE THAT PERVERT ZELOS GUY FROM TALES OF SYMPHONIA! I THOUGHT RIKU SAID HE WAS TOO YOUNG TO DATE!"

"You must be mistaken," called Riku over his shoulder.

"NO, I'M NOT!"

"You must have me confused with someone else," Riku contradicted over his shoulder. "Perhaps that nice Sora?"

"NO!" yelled both Deranged Fangirl Number One and Sora. "EEEEEEW!"

"Okay, guys..." the author said, "I think... this is getting too scary. I'm just gonna... shut down my computer... quietly... please... don't hurt me!"

"OW!" Sora exclaimed. "Everything's going black!"

"Whose foot did I step on?" Riku asked.

"Mine, but I still love you," Deranged Fangirl Number Two said.

"I love him more," Deranged Fangirl Number One argued.

"Nuh uh!"

"Yeah huh!"

"Nuh uh!"

"..." The girl grinned, or at least, she would have if she wasn't inside a computer. "Nuh uh!"

"See, I win!"

" YOU, REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY!"

"You two are scaring me," remarked Riku.

"Okaay..." the author murmured. "Are you all done yet? I'm going to... cautiously... turn on the computer... and start Part VI... would that make you happy? Please? Don't hurt me!"

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