Chapter 28

Ben was studying in their apartment one afternoon, when the phone rang. He was surprised to hear his Mom's frantic voice on the other end.

"Mom? What's wrong? Have you been crying?"

"Ben, I'm so sorry. I promised myself I'd get under control before you answered the phone. I'm sorry."

"Mom, stop. Don't apologize. Just tell me what is going on. Is it something with dad?"

"I'm sorry to be so…. I just don't know how to tell you this."

"Mom, it's okay," he calmly reassured her. "It's going to be okay, whatever it is."

"That's just it. I'm not sure it is. Your dad…he's left. I don't know where he is.. And I'm scared he's in a hospital somewhere, mad at me…."

"Mom, wait a minute. What do you mean, he left? What happened?"

"Well, we had this fight. He saw a card that John sent me, and he got enraged. He started yelling, and then he stormed off. Ben, it was like when you were younger, I haven't seen him that mad in a long time."

"Wait, who is John?"

"Oh, he's this man I was seeing before your dad and I got back together. Andrew didn't know anything about him, and this card was the worst way he could've found out. He feels like I've betrayed him, I'm sure of it."

"Mom, wait, he still has no reason to run off, or to get so mad at you. Remember we talked about this so many times before. You can't blame yourself for his problems."

"I know that. I do. I just…I'm afraid. I don't know what to do. I couldn't find him anywhere, and I just thought…..I'm sorry, I shouldn't be bothering you with this. I know you just started your new semester, and you don't need…"

"Mom, don't be silly. I'm glad you called me. I am."

"Ben, I'm sorry. I just didn't know what else to do. I'm afraid he's really hurt. I don't know where he could be. And I just thought you could help me. But now I don't know why I am bothering you. I mean, you're in New York."

"It'll be all right. I'm sure he'll turn up. You know how he was when I was younger, disappearing for days. I'm sure he has just pulled another one of those stunts," Ben replied, getting angrier by the minute, as he heard the pain in his Mom's voice. "Just try not to worry so much. You know what, maybe you should call this John guy. He might be better for you."

"Ben, didn't you hear what I said? Your dad is missing."

"I know, Mom. But we've been down this road so many times before. And I'm sick of it. I just want you to stop being so scared. "

"I know, Ben. I appreciate all the caring you've shown me throughout all of this, all of your life. I really am."

"Mom, it's going to be okay. We'll figure this all out."

"But, Ben, this is serious. I hope he isn't out on a binge somewhere. That's what I worry about the most. He hasn't even got his new liver yet."

Ben shook his head firmly. "If he's out drinking somewhere and screws all this up -the chance we gave him- I'll never forgive him. I mean it, Mom. I'll never forgive him."

Meanwhile, Felicity and Meghan were making their way from campus to the apartment. Felicity shared with her the talk she had with Noel, and her indecision about art versus medicine.

"You talked to whom? Felicity, what were you thinking? Ben is going to kick his ass! And I want to be there to see it."

"Meghan!" Felicity replied, shaking her head at her friend's intense reaction.

"What? You know I'm right. He's going to be pissed off that you talked to Noel about it and not him. Stop being so damn naïve, you know I'm right."

"I know, but I can explain it to him. I mean, it's not like I'm going to see Noel again."

"You don't know that. He might be planning his next excuse to come here and see you. That guy has always had the hots for you. He's probably hoping that this talk of yours will put a wedge between you and Ben."

"Meghan, stop! Noel is not like that, at least, not anymore. Besides, he seemed really happy, like he had moved on and is doing well. There is nothing between him and me anymore, not even a real friendship."

Meghan eyed her a bit suspiciously, then softened. "Okay, but don't tell me I didn't warn you."

Felicity laughed lightly, "Okay, thanks for the warning. Now, can we please stop talking about Noel?"

"If you say so. How exactly are you going to bring this all up with Ben? I mean, don't you think he's going to wonder why you haven't mentioned this to him? We are talking about you changing majors- again."

"Don't say it like that. I didn't say I was changing my major. I just want to, maybe, stay on here and get another degree. So, it's not changing majors. It's….I don't know, doing two majors," she replied a bit uncertainly.

"Yeah, whatever," she said, still eyeing her a bit suspiciously. "I still say that Ben is going to be pissed. I mean, he may even be jealous."

"What?"

"You know men, how they can't stand competition. You'll both be pre-med and he'll think you're going to beat him in all the classes."

"Meghan, that is ridiculous. Ben will not be jealous. He'll actually probably like having me to study with," she replied, trying to convince herself. They had made it to the apartment, and were about to open the door.

"Oh yeah, a lot of studying will be going on here. Wait, yeah, some studying will be going on- but just on your and Ben's anatomy."

"Meghan!" Felicity replied, a blush spreading across her cheeks, as she opened the door.

"What? You know that I'm right. You don't think Sean and I didn't hear you two when you lived at the loft?"

Ben had just hung up the phone with his mom, and was sitting on the couch with his head hanging down. He tried to compose himself quickly, but Felicity noticed that he was upset. "Ben? What's wrong?" Felicity asked, as she made her way over to him.

Ben replied, "Nothing. It's just my mom. She called." He looked over at Meghan, "Hey, Meghan."

"Hey," she replied, eyeing him suspiciously. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing, just my dad pulling the same old crap." Ben shook his head, and touched Felicity gently on the leg as she sat next to him. She was trying to calm him by holding his hand, but it wasn't working. And Ben interrupted her each time she tried to ask him what was wrong, with just a simple shake of his head.

"It's okay, we'll talk about it later," he whispered. "So, Meghan, are you staying for dinner?"

"What? And interrupt this little drama? No way. Sean is probably wondering if I left him or something."

"Oh? You and Felicity been hanging out long?"

"Yeah, we were talking about you. And that can take all day…."

"Meghan…..that's enough." She shook her head at her friend. "I'll call you tomorrow and we can talk, okay?"

"Yeah, whatever." She walked towards the door, but not before whispering to Felicity, within Ben's earshot, "Good luck talking to him about that thing."

Felicity led her out, "Yeah, thanks. I'll see you."

Ben came up behind Felicity. "Actually, I need to get some air. Why don't you guys hang out some more? It's okay," he said reaching for his basketball from the nearby closet.

"Ben, wait. I want to hear what is going on with your parents."

"I know. I just need to clear my head. I can't really talk about it right now."

Felicity looked at him with concern, and noticed quickly that she wasn't going to change his mind. "What about dinner? I was going to make….."

"It's okay. You two talk. I'll be back soon, and I'll pick up something on my way back. Chinese, okay?"

Felicity nodded. "Yeah, that's good." She could tell that whatever had happened with his parents, was tearing him apart, but he was trying to be strong. She hated to see him hurting like this. She reached up and kissed him on the cheek. "Don't be gone too long."

A few hours later, Ben and Felicity told Meghan goodnight after sharing dinner together after all. Then Felicity pulled their bed down from the wall, and began rearranging the pillows and sheets to allow them a place to sit. He had been quiet through most of the meal. She knew he was thinking it all out, trying to figure out how to handle whatever was going on. He often got quiet like this, and as much as she tried to respect his need for space, she ached to see him so troubled. She led him to the bed, and sat down next to him. "Ben, do you want to talk about it?"

Ben sighed, "I don't know. It's just…Mom called and she said that Dad is gone. He's missing. She's looked everywhere and she can't find him…."

"What? Ben, I'm so sorry. Does she have any idea why he would just take off like that? I mean, you don't think he was out drinking or…."

"Yeah, that's pretty much the conclusion we've come to."

"But, why? I mean, he was so close to getting a new liver. Why would he do that?"

"I don't know. Mom said something about he found a letter from a guy friend of hers and got all jealous."

"Oh," Felicity replied softly. "I'm sorry, Ben. I know this must remind you of when you were younger. And you've been getting a bit closer to him lately. God, your mom must be so worried."

Ben began unbuttoning his shirt, distractedly. "Yeah, she is. I think she wants me to come home, and help her find him. But, our semester just started. I can't just leave."

Felicity helped him with his shirt, making him more comfortable. "I know, Ben. But he's your dad. And your mom is really worried. I think she needs you."

Ben sighed, "I know. She always has."

Felicity smiled lightly, nodding. "I know and it's great that you've always been there for her, I know that she appreciates it. She's told me so, many times." She paused, watching him closely as he stood to get his boxers and finish getting changed for bed. "But, I know that has to get tiring. I mean, you care about your Mom. And you want to help her, but I have a feeling you wish she didn't rely on you so much."

"Yeah," Ben replied softly, sitting back down on the bed. He lay back on the bed, bringing Felicity with him. She laid her head on his chest, and looked at him as he spoke. "I just wish they could figure things out on their own sometimes. And I can't leave right now. Not only did classes just start, but Professor Hodges, he offered me this great opportunity to help him with a project. A lab or something. It might be published and all."

"Really? Wow, that's amazing."

"Yeah, and I can't do the lab if I have to go to California. This couldn't come at a worse time."

"I know, Ben. But your mom wouldn't call you if she didn't think this was very serious. Your dad could really be hurt…"

"Yeah, but that's just it. Part of me doesn't even care."

"Ben, don't say that. You and your dad have come so far. He is a good man, he just…I don't know, he has some issues he is still working out. I know you're tired of dealing with all of this, and it's is really bad timing, but I think you should at least think about going back home."

"I'll go. I kinda have to. But this totally messes up the project with Hodges. It's a big deal, and I don't want to drop out of it. I mean, I was shocked he offered it to me anyway. And I'm barely making this pre med thing as it is."

"Ben, you are not barely making it. You're doing really great." She smiled at him. "Besides, maybe Elena and I could fill in for you or something, check on the lab for you."

"Yeah. That could work, I guess." He shook his head, and sighed. "This semester is not off to a good start, and I'm already exhausted."

She chuckled softly, "Yeah, things are off to an interesting start, for sure. But it's going to be okay. We'll get through this- together."

"Yeah," he said as he rubbed her back softly. They lay there in each other's arms, Felicity's gentle touch calming Ben. "Hey, what were you and Meghan talking about? She said you had to talk to me about something…."

She thought to herself for a moment, "No, it's okay. It's not anything special. We can talk about it some other time."