WARNING! IF YOU DON'T LIKE REALLY WEIRD (AND I MEAN, REALLY WEIRDPAIRINGS AND KINKINESS, I SUGGEST YOU GO OFF AND READ A DIFFERENT STORY THAT HAS A PLAUSIBLE PAIRING AND NO KINKINESS!

Remember, I warned you…

Oh yeah, and like with all my stories, major OOC-ness. AGAIN, I WARNED YOU!

Love for the Lonely

If you could choose one word that described Temari, it would be…horny. Yes, horny. She was about to turn seventeen, and she was very displeased that she hadn't even gotten her first kiss yet! The only boys she was close to were Gaara and Kankuro, but they were her brothers and incest just wasn't the way she flowed.

So while lying in bed wide awake, Temari made a vow: By the time she was seventeen, she will not only have had her first kiss, but her first lay too. Boy, this was going to take some work.

In a whole other village, a whole other person was having the same difficulty.

Sasuke's seventeenth birthday was right around the corner. Sure, he always said that he wasn't into the whole "love" thing, but after some time his hormones played their role and he was starting to get at least a little bit interested in the topic. But of course, not interested enough to forget his main goal in life.

So while lying in bed wide awake, Sasuke made a vow: by his seventeenth birthday, he will have found a girl and banged her good (without, of course, anyone finding out). Boy, this was going to take some work.


The next morning, Temari decided that it was time to get started. She closed the curtains in her small room and locked the door shut. If her brothers found out that she was doing this, they would never let her hear the end of it. Temari took one last look around, crawled under her bed, and fished out her laptop (this was yet another secret she was keeping). She climbed back on the bed and turned the laptop on. She sighed deeply as she quickly logged onto the internet and typed in the web address for the dating site.Yes,it was true. Temari was so desperate that she stooped down to the level of online dating. So what? Everyone did it. So go screw yourself.

Temari scrolled up and clicked the box that said "register". Even now, she still couldn't believe she was doing this. A new page popped up that had blanks that were to be filled in: "Username", "Age", "Sex", "Location", and "Interests". Temari bit on her lip as she thought of a username.

'Something that won't give me away,' she thought.

She thought for another moment before flexing her fingers and typing in:

FanGirl101

Temari scrolled down and entered the rest of the information (she resisted the urge to type in "Yes please" in the "Sex" blank) until she got to the blank entitled "Interests". She tapped her fingers on the keyboard.

'Now this is tough…'

After five minutes of thinking, Temari typed in the only thing that she had had on her mind these last few years:

Getting laid

Temari sighed and clicked on the 'Submit' button. She had to admit that this was pretty dang shallow, but she had a promise to herself that she had to keep.

After only a few hours, Temari had met many men online that were very enjoyable to talk to. But there was one in particular that stood out to her: Avenger202. Not only did this guy live in Konoha Village (which was a whole lot closer than the other guys), but he was around her age, too!

Temari yawned and began typing again. She had been talking to Avenger202 since noon and it was already ten o' clock at night!

So what are you up to?

She waited patiently for a response.

Nothing really…

Temari was about to respond but stopped when she saw that he was still typing.

My seventeenth birthday is only a week away.

Temari's eyes widened and she felt her heart beat start to quicken. She gulped and typed in:

Really? So is mine!

Again she waited.

Woah…weird… Was the response she got.

Temari stared at the screen. Should she tell this guy that she barely even knew about her little personal bet? Most likely not. He would get grossed out and never talk to her again. Temari exhaled deeply. This was stupid. She would never lose her virginity, especially not to some online chum.

She stretched her fingers and was about to tell Aveneger202 that she had to go, but was once again stopped by his typing.

Listen, can you meet me on Saturday? At the Ichiraku ramen bar at 5 P.M.? It's in my village.

And before Temari could respond, he signed off.

She stared at the screen, speechless. He wanted to meet? Already? Wow, this was easier than she thought! She sighed contentedly and shut off her laptop.

'Thank god for online dating,' she thought.


Sasuke shut off his computer and leaned back in the chair. He had just spent eight hours talking to this FanGirl101 on the dating site.Yeah, so what? The great Uchiha Sasuke was so desperate that he registered on an online dating sight. So fuck off.

He stretched his arms and got up off the chair. The girl he was talking actually sounded pretty cool, a nice change from the idiot girls of Konoha. Not only did she live pretty near (the Sand), her birthday was on the same day! Pretty sweet, huh?


Little did either Sasuke or Temari know, they climbed into bed at the exact same time, both turned on their left side, and said together:

"Damn, this is gonna be an easy lay."

A/N: SEE! WHAT DID I SAY? KINKY, WEIRD PAIRING, AND OOC! I WARNED YA!