AN: Here is chapter twenty five. Hope it is up to par for you :-). It really wrote itself which was a nice switch from the last couple chapters. Thanks to all who are reading and double thanks to those who reviewed. Alas enjoy chapter 25! -- dark rolling sea.
Chapter Twenty Five
Gibbs and Kate made their way towards Ann's house. Gibbs stopped off first to get coffee. He bought three cups. He handed one to Kate, and had one of the others downed before they were at Ann's. He then slowly sipped on the third cup he had bought.
Once they were inside Gibbs decided to wait until everyone was together before he told the news. He let Kate know that he felt it was better that way and she agreed. They would wait for Jeb and Kylie to join them before they spilled the news.
It was another hour before everyone showed up. Jeb had said that Hunter decided to go to school that morning and it really shocked Gibbs a little bit. He knew his grandson was having trouble with the notion of going to school while all of this was on his mind, but he figured it was just time that the boy needed to get away.
They all went out for breakfast at Gibbs insistence, and his pocket book. As they were finishing their meal he glanced up at Kate and smiled. She nodded and Gibbs cleared his throat. Everyone looked at him expectantly and again he felt the nervousness hit him. His palms were sweaty and his pulse was quickening. He smiled and took a breath.
"We have something we'd like to share," Gibbs said. He looked around at everyone then wet his lips before continuing. "Kate and I are getting married."
Everyone at the table stopped what they were doing. There was a lot of disbelief and shock. Gibbs waited impatiently for someone to say something. The panic was surging again and he looked from face to face. He looked at Kate and he swallowed. He felt like he was in front of a fire squad. Finally Jeb broke into a huge grin.
"Bout damn time, old man," he said with a laugh. Everyone else was smiling now too. The initial shock had worn off and they were all happy now. Gibbs breathed in the relief and looked at his son with a mock glare.
"Who you calling old?" Gibbs asked gruffly. Jeb only laughed.
"Wow, I thought you vowed never to marry again," Ann said lightly with a smile.
"That's what I thought too," Kate said softly and took Gibbs' hand in hers.
"Sometimes, chances come along and change your mind," Gibbs said looking at Kate. They finished the meal and left the restaurant. Donovan came up to Gibbs as they were leaving.
"Congrats, Gunny," he said extending his hand. Gibbs took it and they shared a firm handshake.
"Thanks, R. J. So when are you going to meet the girl of your dreams?"
"Ah, don't know, but my mother wishes it would be soon."
"Don't rush it. Wait till it's worth it."
"Experience?"
"Three failures, son. None of them felt like this one."
"Well I hope this one is forever, sir."
"You and me both," Gibbs said with a smile as he watched Kate. She turned to look at him then and gave him a smile.
The rest of the week passed quickly for them. Everyone was feeling the anxiety of what was to come. Gibbs was watching Hunter closely as the boy seemed to be closing himself off from everyone. He was worried. Kylie was keeping Jeb going, and Jeb was working hard to maintain his positive attitude. Ann was showing her worry, but Gibbs knew she was strong. Of course they all had Donovan and Kate to lean on too and that helped more than either of them could ever know.
The doctor had scheduled Jeb for surgery on Friday morning and it was now Thursday night. The family stayed in at Ann's for the night. They were all restless. Jeb and Kylie sat close on the couch while watching television, Ann sitting in the chair watching her son. Donovan was pacing in the background, his nerves showing through his polished exterior. Hunter stayed on the floor in front of the television for most of the night, avoiding talking to anyone. There was such a drastic change in him lately from the strong rock he was at the beginning to the ghost he was now.
Gibbs couldn't take the tension in the room anymore so he went out on the porch to enjoy the cool night air. Kate knew he needed time to think alone so she stayed in the living room with the rest. After a while she saw Hunter get up. No one else seemed to notice. He looked around the room quickly and she saw he wore a frown. He then looked out the window and slowly went to the door. He quickly left the house pulling the door shut softly.
Hunter looked around and saw his grandfather sitting in a chair staring up at the sky. He took a deep breath and slowly walked up to him. Gibbs looked down at Hunter and smiled. Hunter looked up at the sky and blinked away his tears. Gibbs saw the fear and pain in Hunter's eyes and he scooped the boy into his lap. He held him tight against his chest as Hunter leaned into him and cried. Gibbs ran a hand softly through Hunter's hair as he cried, and rubbed his back. He didn't say anything.
Finally the boy settled and turned his head so his ear was resting against Gibbs' chest. He looked up at the sky and then wiped at his nose with his sleeve. Gibbs didn't want to break the silence between them; also he didn't know what to say to the boy.
"Papa?" Hunter asked softly still staring up at the sky.
"Yeah, buddy?" Gibbs said in a whisper as if raising his voice would shatter the fragile environment that surrounded them.
"If uncle Jeb dies who will I live with?"
"Uncle Jeb is going to be fine," Gibbs said biting back the tears he felt forming.
"You can't make that promise. My dad should have been fine too."
"What happened to you dad was an accident."
"It's the same thing, Papa, really it is. If uncle Jeb dies who will I live with?"
"Most likely your grandmother."
"How come? Why not you?"
"Oh, buddy, Kate and I are never home. We work so much."
"You could stop, you could not work so much."
"Don't you worry. Uncle Jeb will be fine and it won't matter because you'll live with him and Aunt Kylie and the new baby."
"I'm really scared, Papa."
"I know, buddy, I'm scared too. I'm so scared of losing your uncle like I did your dad. I know how much this can be scary but sometimes you just have to be tough and know that in the end it will all be ok."
"But you can't know that."
"But you can hope."
"But you still can't know."
"How'd you get to be so smart?"
"Funny, Papa. I miss you and Kate. I wish you could live here."
"I know. But our jobs are in Washington."
"I know. When I get bigger I want to be like you, Papa. I want to get the bad guys."
"I know you do."
"Can I be an agent?"
"When you get old enough you sure can."
"Do I have to be a marine first?"
"No. Buddy, you can just be an agent it you want."
"But you were a marine first. And Uncle Jeb he was a marine, and Uncle R. J. is a marine too."
"Right."
"Maybe I should be a marine too."
"Maybe."
"Marines catch the bad guys too."
"Yes they do."
"Will you teach me how to be an agent, Papa?"
"When this is all over you come visit me in Washington when you have a break from school, and I'll teach you how to be agent."
"Thanks, Papa."
"Anything for you, Buddy."
They were silent after that. Hunter curled tighter into Gibbs' hold and he was content to cling tightly to his grandson. They stayed like that for a while, both staring up into the starry sky, wondering what would happen in the morning. They both felt the fear of losing a loved one and both new it would be a long hard day.
Inside Jeb and Kylie had fallen asleep on the couch and Donovan had finally stopped pacing. He was sitting at the table in the kitchen fidgeting with the table cloth. He was far from his normal self, the control and calm exterior being unraveled with the coming uncertainty. Ann had fallen asleep in the recliner so Kate switched the television off and then quietly looked out the window onto the porch. She saw Gibbs holding Hunter tightly as they watched the stars and felt that she shouldn't intrude on the moment.
Instead she walked into the kitchen and sat down across the table from Donovan. She watched him tug at the table cloth for a while, trying to get a feel for his emotions. Finally he looked up and offered a half smile. She saw it was forced and strained. She reached across and stilled his hand with hers. He looked down at it and sighed.
"Want to talk about it?"
"It's funny. How I can dress up and charge into a firefight without even a moments hesitation or thought but when it comes to something like this I'm frazzled."
"It's normal. The firefight is a brief explosion of events. Your adrenaline is firing through your veins, pumping your body full of energy and strength. You don't have time to think, you only act and react to what is going on around you. When it is something like this you have time to think, to contemplate, to realize you have no control."
"In command it's inevitable. You are going to lose men under you. It's still hard but you know the risk going in. You cope with it and move on long before the man is even killed. But here now, like this? How can you ever cope with something like this? I feel so unraveled. So strung thin."
"This is a different kind of loss, R. J. Here there is no rhyme or reason to why it chose Jeb. There is no explanation why it happened to this family."
"You're right. In battle every man signed on for it. Every one of the soldiers knows the risk of death going in. You accept that when you sign up for basic. You know the risk when you strap that rifle to your back and carry your pack off into the sight of the enemy."
"And now you can't even see your enemy. You can't confront it and ask it why. You don't know its reason for attacking. Its not prejudice, or seeking power. It's not about money or freedom. Its only life and death."
"Is there ever an answer, Ma'am?"
"No, I don't think there is. There is only the journey. It is about being strong and surviving. There is no destination or treasure at the end. There is no reward, or goal to be accomplished, other than survival."
"It just doesn't make sense."
"And it never will. We just have to endure. Make the best of the situation and strive to accomplish what we can. We have to be the wall that holds up the roof that covers the heads of the unsuspecting. There is nothing else we can do."
"Thank you."
"For what?"
"For everything you have done. For me, for Jeb, for the gunny, for this family. Just being here. Thank you."
"You are welcome."
The two sat in silence after that. It was another couple hours before Kate heard Gibbs come back into the house. He was carrying a sleeping Hunter. He took him back into one of the bedrooms and gently laid him on the bed. He bent down and gently kissed his grandson on the forehead and brushed his hair back.
"Good night, buddy. Everything will be ok," he whispered and then quietly made his way from the room. He smiled wearily at Kate as he came back into the kitchen area and sat down next to Donovan. Kate looked at Gibbs and noticed the haggardness in his face. She glanced at Donovan and noticed he didn't look much better.
"Maybe you two should get some sleep," Kate said softly. They both shook their heads together and continued to study the table cloth. Kate yawned and then sighed.
"Go on back, Kate, there's a bed in the other room you can use," Gibbs said softly. She nodded and made her way into the back of the house. She stopped in the doorway of the room Hunter was in and watched him sleep for a while. She then decided that she would sleep in this room tonight. She laid down on the bed gently and curled up on the other side of the bed. She was out almost as soon as her head hit the pillow.
TBC…