Survivor: Inuyasha Days 12-15
Matt Duszynski
Continuing on! No time for reviews!
PREVIOUSLY ON SURVIVOR: The host got so pissed off at the crew, that he went on vacation.
AND NOW THE CONTINUATION:
"Ahh. On a plane to the British Virgin Islands, with no Inuyasha, Koga, or anybody."
MEANWHILE, ON A BOAT TO THE BRITISH VIRGIN ISLANDS…
"Inuyasha, save it for the host."
"You're right, Koga."
"OH MY GOD! You two are getting along!"
"Of course, my lady Kagome."
"I AM GONNA KILL YOU DAMN WIMPY WOLF!"
"Never mind."
DAY 13: BRITISH VIRGIN ISLANDS
"What a nice relaxing vacation on my catamaran. No worries, no cares in the world… who the… someone's parachuting towards my boat! OH F--- IT'S INUYASHA! Engines on… GO! GO! GO!"
The twin 500 horsepower engines rumbled to life, and the boat sped up to 20 mph.
"Hah hah hah. Thinks he can get away? No chance!"
Inuyasha pulled the ripcord, and a lot of instant ramen fell out.
"Oh. I shouldn't have packed my chute on an empty stomach. OH FU- (splash)"
"Sucker. Okay, I can shut 'em down now, and go back to sleep."
15 MINUTES LATER…
The boat suddenly rocked, and a lot of yelling was heard in the distance.
"What the f- oh crap, the others have their own boat. I would guess that Kagome's driving. Port engine on… starboard engine on… FULL FORWARD!
The big engines cranked up to 5000 rpms, but they were still gaining.
"Must be driving a speedboat."
Then, the port engine cut.
"Oh crud."
5 MINUTES LATER…
"I TOLD YOU PEOPLE I WAS ON VACATION! WHAT THE F--- IS GOING ON? Wait… that's my personal host speedboat! AAAGH!"
"Calm down, we're only borrowing it."
"WATCH OUT FOR THE… (LARGE SMASH)… reef. Well, there goes the boat. We're going back to the island… which you shouldn't have gotten off of."
DAY 14: THE ISLAND
"Okay, reward challenge with a twist. The objective is to scale that pole, walk across the rope, get the keys hanging in the tree, and bring them back. I will be attempting to distract you. First person back here with the keys wins my catamaran. Losers will join me at Tribal Council and vote someone out. SURVIVORS READY? GET THE F--- OUT OF MY FACE!
After the challenge…
"Well, Inuyasha jumped off to get instant ramen, Kagome fell off when I shot her with a tranquilizer, Sango fell off due to the giant boomerang, Naraku fell off when I shot him with a tranquilizer, and Koga fell off when I shot the wire out. BACK TO CAMP! NOW!
LATER AT THE CAMPSITE…
insert Naraku's dumb evil laugh here "Soon, the show will be completely taken over by me, and I will rule over Inuyasha and the others… OW!"
Fortunatley for the cast of the show, the host showed up and beat him with a frying pan.
"Kittens are cuddly…"
"Maybe I shouldn't have hit that hard."
"Doggies are cute…"
"Everyone's gone."
Then, everyone came back with frying pans.
"Are we too late?"
"FRYING PAN FIGHT!"
LATER, AFTER A CONCUSSION OR TWO…
The host was standing unscathed, Inuyasha had a broken arm, Kagome had snuck out of the fight, Naraku was unconscious (due to extreme force of frying pan pain) Koga had his legs broken, and Sango broke her boomerang. Suddenly, Fluffy showed up.
"Ha! You think puny mortal insane asylums will keep the great Sesshomaru… (someone says 'Fluffy') AAARGH!"
"TEAM ON FLUFFY!"
And Fluffy was beaten down and shipped to the hospital in a box.
"Inuyasha, did you put the 'HANDLE WITH CARE' sticker on?"
"What sticker?"
"Good. Now, Sango, you're getting kicked off because of your broken boomerang (weeping noises), and Koga is going to the hospital because we busted up your legs. AIN'T THAT RIGHT, KOGA!"
Koga, who was trying to sneak away, was set upon by a frying pan-wielding host.
"NOW YOU REALLY GOIN' TO THE HOSPITAL, FOOL!"
LATER…
"Alright. It's time for the final challenge. Everyone has to battle each other, but I will be throwing random characters from other anime series' in. GO!" And the host poofed away to go grab someone.
Suddenly, the fight began. Inuyasha pulled out his Tetsuiga (most likely incorrect spelling, SUE ME! OH HELL NO DON'T SUE ME!) and attempted to hit Naraku, who was dominating. The host reappeared, along with a confused girl.
"Contestants, meet Aoko Nakamori. Here's a mop. Go hurt them all, and I'll tell you where Kaito is hiding."
'They are so screwed.'
And indeed they were, because Aoko dominated and kicked everyone's ass to Jerusalem and back.
"Kaito's in the school basement."
Aoko disappeared, and someone else appeared in her place.
"Is Aoko gone?"
"Yes, Kaito, she is. Now, go get Shinichi Kudo."
"Will do!"
And seconds later a bewildered Shinichi Kudo was standing there.
"Congratulations! You freaking win Survivor: Inuyasha, because I watch Detective Conan too! Here's a million dollars, go away."
"SWEET!"
LATER…
"You all lose, so get the hell out of here!"
"Who won?"
"Shinichi Kudo and Kaito Kuroba."
"WHAT? That teenage detective and the lousy magician! WTF, MATES?"
"GIT EM' BOYS!"
Men with tranquilizers jumped out and shot everyone.
LATER IN FEUDAL JAPAN…
"Where… wha… HEY! We're back! Wait… DAMN IT! THAT HOS DIDN'T GIVE US ANY MONEY!"
LATER IN PRESENT DAY JAPAN…
Shinichi Kudo was walking down the street when the former host of Survivor: Inuyasha ran up to him.
"You planted the money in Kagome's bag?"
"Yep."
"Thanks. See you around."
LATER IN FEUDAL JAPAN…
"Fine, Shippo, you can have some choco… THE MONEY WE WON!
THE END, to a particularly hard to write final chapter. MASSIVELY HUGE WRITER'S BLOCK FOR A COUPLE MONTHS! Review if you want a sequel. Perhaps 'The Amazing Race Nine: Inuyasha'?