Hallo! Another long chapter since the story was not updated for a little bit. Sorry about that.
Thanks so much to all the people who reviewed! You're too kind!
Here comes the drama! xD
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"Light in the Shadow"
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Chapter 6
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Obi-Wan felt ashamed at the way he had acted the other day. He'd been incredibly stiff with Anakin. He shouldn't have pushed the boy, but two days ago...whenever he saw Anakin, all he could see or think about was two days ago. Red gathered in his mind, and he struggled to control it. It even scared him sometimes at how raw the emotion was, how powerful.
He looked out of the wide window from where he sat on the couch in the living room. The stars could not be seen due to the bright lights of Coruscant, but he could see them clearly in his mind. So many missions, so many planets, so many different skies filled with different stars. He always had the occasional moment throughout his life when he was with Qui-Gon when he realized just how much his Master meant to him. It was one of those times now. Qui-Gon was as close as it got to a real father, and he had been abandoned without any real goodbye. No defining words of wisdom, no hug with the 'you were an exceptional padawan.'
When he'd passed the trials, all he had gotten was a pat on the back and a 'I knew you could do it.' And then Qui-Gon had gone on with his own life, almost like Obi-Wan had never existed. And he tried to convince himself that his former Master was just very busy making Anakin a good padawan, he didn't have the time to do anything else.
But two days ago...
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( Flashback. )
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Obi-Wan smiled as he saw Qui-Gon walking down one of the great halls of the Jedi Temple directly opposite him. He was walking at an easy gait, his hand at his bearded chin, looking as thoughtful as he ever did. He seemed to come out of his query when he heard Obi-Wan's footsteps and a smile came to his face. Obi-Wan's heart fluttered inside of his chest. Finally, some recognition.
"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon said with good cheer, "how are you doing with your padawan?"
Obi-Wan stopped before his Master with a grin and shoved each hand into their opposite sleeves. "She's doing very well, a promising additon to the Jedi."
Qui-Gon apprised Obi-Wan with pride in his eyes, the corners crinkling gladly. "You're a very capable Jedi, Obi-Wan. You've always managed to adapt no matter what situation you find yourself thrown in."
Obi-Wan bowed to Qui-Gon. "You were a good, Master, Qui-Gon."
Qui-Gon smiled gently. "And you were a good Padawan."
Obi-Wan beamed that perfect smile of his before daring to ask, "Would you like to spar with me, Qui-Gon?"
His former Master's mouth was forming into the beginnings of a 'y', but then the rest never followed as a loud holler of triumph echoed down the hall.
"Master Qui-Gon! Master Qui-Gon!" Anakin was shouting as he sped around the corner, "You have to come see this! It's working! I made it work!"
Qui-Gon turned to his Padawan with an interested smile as he tugged at his Master's robes. He chuckled at the boy's enthusiasm before turning back to Obi-Wan with a sheepish expression. "Perhaps some other time, Obi-Wan?"
Obi-Wan felt something icy spread through his chest. "Sure," he mumbled, immobile.
"All right, show me this thing," Qui-Gon laughed as Anakin hopped up and down anxiously.
For a moment, it felt as if Obi-Wan were apart of some other being entirely. He was not himself. With the cold breath of ice came the melting heat of anger and sorrow. How could he be so easily brushed off? And for what? That pathetic little ingrate?
It was almost too late when he realized that these emotions were oozing out of him. He quickly shoved them in and assumed a nonchalant expression as Qui-Gon turned for a moment, concerned. "Obi-Wan?"
The young Knight blinked, raising his brows. "Yes?"
Qui-Gon stared for a moment before shaking his head absently. "Good day." He moved off with the energetic young Skywalker.
Obi-Wan felt that if he exhaled, he might possibly see a cloud of vapor. And if he moved, he would fall to pieces. So he stayed there for a long while and then he left to the gardens.
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( End Flashback. )
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He could feel every short exhale of breath, every cool inhale. He grabbed the end of his right sleeve with his hand and brought it up to his mouth, breathing through the coarse fabric. His breaths were warmer now. He closed his eyes, steadying his thoughts. He was twenty-five, he was an adult. His emotions were silly and childish. Anakin did not ask to be a slave, nor did he ask to be 'The Chosen One,' that was if he was 'The Chosen One.'
He ran his hand over his face, sighing heavily.
"Master," a soft voice said, startling the Jedi Knight.
Ana stood in the doorway, watching Obi-Wan with curious hazel eyes, a gentle frown on her lips. "It's the middle of the night," she said with obvious concern.
Obi-Wan let out a mildly exasperated huff. "I'm sorry, Padawan. I couldn't sleep."
Ana glanced out the living room window as she moved over to the couch, sitting down beside her Master. "Then I will stay here until you're ready to."
Obi-Wan frowned. "Ana."
Ana shook her head. "I can't sleep knowing that you can't sleep."
Obi-Wan stood. "Then I will go to sleep now."
Ana adopted a stubborn look. "No you won't. You'll just go in your room and lay in bed. You need your rest more than I need mine," she reasoned.
Obi-Wan smiled endearingly, sitting back down. "I will make a deal with you. You may stay out here with me for two hours. If I don't go feel like sleeping by then, you must go back to bed anyway. Deal?"
Ana seemed unhappy with the arrangement, but nodded anyway. "Deal."
"Good." Obi-Wan smirked and leaned back on the couch. He gazed at his apprentice curiously before speaking again. "You've been practicing. Your oneness with the Force is very strong for your age."
Ana smiled, lifting her legs up from the floor and crossing them on the couch cushions. "I want to do great things for all life forms, Master. If I am to make any difference, I must be as strong as I can be."
Obi-Wan's blue-gray eyes softened. "Then I have no doubt that you will one day be a great Jedi Master."
Ana's eyes lit up happily. "Do you really mean it?"
"Always and forever," he said with a tender smile.
Ana beamed proudly.
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Ana hopped out of bed when she woke, even though she'd stayed up with her Master well past two hours. They had talked about all kinds of things. Their likes, their dislikes. Ana giggled as she dressed in her public attire, remembering how similar they were with the things they did not favor.
She felt so refreshed. She knew so much about her Master now, of course, she was sure there were many more things to learn, but considering how much she knew of him before, she had made definite progress.
After brushing her wavy locks, she moved out of her room and into the kitchen where Obi-Wan was already shuffling about, readying some tea. "Good morning," she greeted.
Obi-Wan looked over his shoulder and smiled. "Good morning, Ana."
She sat down at the little island table and he soon joined her with two steaming mugs of fresh tea.
"I'm not going easy on you in practice today," he said sternly, but playfully.
Ana laughed. "And neither am I."
He smirked.
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After her practice with her Master, Ana proceeded through the Jedi temple halls to Lexi's apartment that was shared with her own Master. She had not seen her friend at breakfast and she was a little worried. Lexi had never missed breakfast before.
She stepped before her friend's door and knocked. She had to wait for a long while before Lexi's Master came to the door, opening it only halfway and placing himself so that he blocked all view into the apartment. "Yes?" He asked curtly.
Ana resisted the urge to scowl. "Is Lexi here?"
"Yes." He raised his brow expectantly.
Ana blinked in confusion. Didn't he get the hint? "Can I talk to her?" she asked with wide, mocking eyes.
"I have forbidden that Lexi talk to you, Padawan Star. You and that little machine loving miscreant," he said with a small sneer.
Ana's features hardened in extreme dislike. "You can't make her do anything," she said stingily.
"As a matter of fact, I can. You forget your place, padawan." Lottos said firmly, looming forward.
Ana's brows furrowed angrily. "She has a right to the friends she makes! You can't control who she talks to and sees!"
He smiled, unbothered. "I think you're mistaken, because I am doing it right now." And then he shut the door in her face.
Ana's mouth dropped open, her expression appalled. How dare he do such a thing! She could feel the rage boiling deep within her gut and spreading throughout her body until her fists were clenched so tightly her knuckles were turning white. "We'll see." She seethed, turning on her heel and heading toward the Council Chambers. She'd had enough of Master Lottos.
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It was only an hour later before Ana found herself standing next to an inquisitive Master Lottos, both in the view of Master Yoda and Master Windu. Since the matter did not call upon such importance as to summon the other Masters, the two who were usually available presided to handle any problems.
"A problem, you have, Padawan Star," Yoda stated, opening the conversation.
"Yes, Master." She glanced harshly at Master Lottos. He had the complete look of nonchalance and confusion.
"And what is your problem, young one?"
Ana took a deep breath. "Master Lottos has been very rude to me, and to my friends. He refuses to let me see his padawan, Lexxa Lysk. I find that unfair, Masters. She is my best friend."
"Knight Lottos?" Mace Windu asked, brows raised in question.
Lottos blinked, looking at Ana innocently. "I have no idea what she is talking about, Masters. I merely told her that Lexxa was busy meditating. Her training is important, especially at her young age. I was not aware that I offended her in any way."
Ana's eyes widened in disbelief. Liar! Rotten liar! "That's not true! You told me that you forbid me to see her, and that I had no say in anything!"
Master Lottos looked at her like she was crazy. "I'm certain I said no such thing. Have I done something in the past to offend you, Padawan? You seem angry with me."
Ana practically felt dizzy with ire. "What?" she managed to hiss out, "How dare you lie to Jedi Masters! I can't believe this! You don't deserve to be a Jedi, you low-down, stuck-up, rankweed sucker!"
"Padawan Star!" came Mace Windu's sharp reprimand, immediately washing Ana in a pool of shame. She recoiled, her anger near forgotten as the Korun Master looked at her gravely.
"Please, don't punish her, Master Windu," Lottos interjected, "she's obviously upset over something, she wasn't thinking."
Ana's mouth opened and closed wordlessly, her mind trying to grapple for something to say. It took her all her power not to go off on another barrage of insults.
"Knight Lottos has been nothing but polite since he has been here. And your previous actions have done nothing to prove your accusations. This matter looks settled to me. You seemed to have had a misunderstanding, it would do you good to listen next time." He watched her pointedly, challenging her to oppose his judgement. When she said nothing, he closed the conversation. "You may go. Though Master Lottos has saved you from a proper punishment, your Master will still be contacted and informed of your actions."
Ana let out a tiny moan, before dropping her head and nodding. "Yes, Master Windu," she said sullenly.
"And you would do good to change your attitude."
Ana swallowed thickly. "Yes, Master."
She looked up sadly, her eyes going from the calm and collected Lottos, to the disappointed Mace Windu, and lastly to the curious gaze of Yoda. She turned away and left the room, tears prickling her eyes. She kept them in until the turbolift doors closed and then they were rushing down her cheeks. "Stupid, lying nerfherder!" she sobbed, kicking the wall of the lift. She ran from the lift, all the way to the gardens and stayed there. She would put off facing her Master for as long as she could.
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It was nearly sundown when footsteps sounded close by. Ana sat on a bench far back in the gardens; she had collected herself now and was merely thinking of what she would say to her Master. He of all people would believe in her, would he not? She watched the opening in the bushes apprehensively, that is until Lexi appeared there.
"There you are," she said with furrowed brows.
"Oh, Lexi," Ana said sadly, standing up, going to hug her, but her friend backed up, preventing her from touching her.
"I can't believe you, Ana. You went to the Council about my Master?" Lexi said in frustration.
Ana blinked in confusion. "He's controlling you, Lexi! It's getting out of hand, he needs to be stopped!"
"And what you did helped me?" She asked crossly, "You only made things worse, Ana. Do you realize how mad my Master is now?"
Ana stepped back, hurt. "But I was just trying to keep you safe! I was worried!"
"I said I needed your support, Ana! I didn't say I wanted you running to the Council just to stir things up." Her expression was forlorn. "I said I could handle it, and you didn't believe in me!"
"That's not true! I believe in you-"
"Then why did you do that?" Lexi interrupted.
"I was just--"
"You were just looking out for me, huh? How can we be friends if you can't even trust in me, Ana?" Lexi said sadly. "It hurts me to know that you think I'm not strong enough to handle my own problems. Is it because I'm a little kid? Are you so much better cause you're four years older?"
Ana wanted to cry again, but for some reason, the tears were in her heart and not on her cheeks. "It's not like that. Please, I'm sorry, Lexi. I won't do it again."
Lexi watched her with a deep frown, her arms crossed, body shifting uncomfortably. "I-I understand, Ana. Just please, I'm not a little kid, okay?"
Ana closed her eyes, regret filling her. How had everything backfired so badly? She thought she had it all under control...what an understatement. "Okay..."
Lexi nodded, sighing. "I forgive you..." There was a long, sad silence. Lexi broke it. "Come on, dinner is being served. Anakin will worry about us."
Ana nodded before following sullenly after Lexi. This had to be about the worse day of her life.
And it had started so good, too...
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Nothing was mentioned to Anakin while they ate. Lexi kept up normal conversation with Anakin, managing to keep her tone normal and unbothered.
Ana only ate her food silently, talking if either asked her a question. When Anakin asked what was wrong, she only said that she hadn't slept last night and she was tired.
When they were done, Lexi got up with Anakin and with good nights, both left to their quarters. Ana roamed the halls for a little while, still reluctant to return to her and Obi-Wan's apartment.
After a while, she was scolded by none other than the Cheif Librarian, Jocasta Nu, and was told to return to her quarters. She depressedly slumped her way back to the apartments.
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Ana stepped inside of the apartment as quietly as she could.
"Ana," a voice said firmly from the living room just as she closed the door. She winced and remained where she was as if just standing there would change the way things were. She felt so stupid for the way she has acted and in front of the two most important Jedi Masters of the Council. She just couldn't help it, a thing she had recently realized about herself was that when her friends were in trouble or threatened, she locked up into this radical defensive mode.
"Ana," Obi-Wan's voice said again, more tired.
Ana frowned sadly, walking slowly down the hall and into the living room. Obi-Wan sat on the couch, staring down at a holopad. He must've got the message just a little while ago. Ana stayed by the entry way, head down.
There was a long silence before her Master emitted a sigh. "I believe you."
Ana looked up, hazel eyes blinking. "What?" She whispered.
Obi-Wan turned his head to her, motioning for her to sit down beside him. He did not look angry. Ana complied and sat gingerly next to him. He took her hand. "Why didn't you tell me first, Ana? What you did was extremely foolish."
Ana felt her cheeks start to burn again, but she refused to let her emotions get the best of her. "I'm sorry, Master. I don't know what came over me...Lexi was my best friend, how could I stand by and let her Master be so mean to her?"
"Was?" Obi-Wan asked softly.
Ana looked away, sucking in her breath. "She came to me...she was so mad at me, she said I made things worse. I said I was sorry and she said she forgave me...but I know she's still upset with me. I broke her trust...and now things aren't like they used to be, now there is this tension between us...I can feel it, even if I can't see it." She looked away, her free hand covering her mouth.
Obi-Wan was quiet for a long moment, giving her time to gather herself.
She turned back to him; she thought she had her emotions in control, but her heart skipped a fearful beat and the cage opened, letting everything out.
She cried openly, trying to pull her hand from Obi-Wan's so she could retreat to her room, but he held on to it. She looked at him with frustration that melted into sorrow at the look on his face. He didn't mind and he didn't care. He only understood and forgave. Because once he had done the same and he had been alone with everyone's hidden anger. He didn't want Ana to be alone.
She cried into his tunic front, hugging him, her shoulders shaking, and he hugged her back, whispering gently, "Everyone makes mistakes, Ana, even Jedi..."
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TBC...
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Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed.
-Aryll & Alley