Akiro- Panther, get your tail at this computer and upload this chapter right now!

Me- Quit yelling. I'm getting to it!

Akiro- Come on, this is chapter seven! You've only got four more to go!

Me- So you're starting the countdown already?

Akiro- Yup! By the way, you do know you're getting into this nasty habit of updating roughly once a month, right?

Me- Come on! You know I'm trying to be original and funny at the same time!

Now thoroughly riled up and completely miffed, the Angry Mob prepared to lay siege on Melvin's fortress. Well, they would have, had they not been sitting around the table eating milk and cookies. Spyro glanced up and saw the people reading the story. "Whoa!" he exclaimed. "Guys! Another chapter's starting!"

"Yaah!" everyone else exclaimed, standing up and hurriedly getting into costume.

Bianca searched around for her pitchfork. "Geeze! At least warn us when we're starting up the plot again!"

"Forget the stupid plot and get comical!" Hunter shouted. "We've got a Melvin to beat up!"

The doors on the Home Depot (which just happened to be where Melvin's hideout was.) were locked. The Angry Mob grabbed a nearby battering ram and charged at the doors. The door opened immediately, with a loud bang!

"Everyone! Raise your weapons and begin chanting in complete synchronization!" Spyro yelled. And everyone did just that! "Charge!" he yelled again. The Angry Mob ran into the store, knocking over and breaking everything in their path, save for a single shelf. Hunter hurried back, pushed over the shelf, and then went to catch up with the rest of the mob.

"Hurry! We must mindlessly destroy everything in the store before we can find Melvin!" Bianca shouted.

"Um, why?" asked Red, who had joined the Angry Mob when no one was looking.

"Because we've still got several chapters to go and we're running out of stuff to do."

The Angry Mob went all over the Home Depot, breaking stuff. They broke boards, they broke shelves, they broke the garden section, they broke the bank, and they broke seventeen horses. The cowboys were very happy, because they didn't have to break the horses themselves.

"Hey, you break it, you buy it!" whined one of the cashiers. Sheila hopped over to him and held out her hand.

"Pick out two." she said.

"One, two!" the cashier said, picking out two fingers. Sheila used the fingers he selected to poke him in the eye. "OW!" Then she turned him around, gave him a wedgie, and kicked him away.

SOME TIME LATER

"Did you guys break everything?" asked Spyro.

"Yes." the Angry Mob said.

"Did you break the power tools?" he pressed.

"Yes." the Angry Mob said. Spyro crossed his arms and stared at them. They were all either staring at their feet or looking around.

"Don't lie to me! Did you break the power tools?"

"No..."

"I thought so. Now, you go break those power tools or you don't get to beat up Melvin."

"But that's not fair!" the Angry Mob whined.

"No buts! If you don't like it, you can go beat up Clem."

"But Clem's not fun to beat up anymore." Hunter complained. He reached off screen and pulled Clem out of a plot hole. Clem was holding a half-eaten carton of ice cream, was wearing a bathrobe, and looked very confused. "See?" Hunter punched Clem in the face rapidly a few times. "I'm not having fun!"

"Neither am I!" said Clem. Hunter pushed him back through the plot hole.

"Go break the rest of the power tools!" Spyro ordered. The Angry Mob grumbled as they went to break stuff. "And don't slouch!"

Finally, everything was broken. "Good! Now, let's get Melvin!" The Angry Mob ran to the back of the store and opened the door. Standing there was Melvin, wearing nothing but polka-dot boxers and drinking coffee. The Angry Mob screamed! Melvin screamed! The readers screamed! The writer screamed!

Melvin stared back at all these people looking at him. "Are we starting up the plot again?" he asked. The Angry Mob nodded as they covered their eyes. "Should I put some pants on?" he asked. The Angry Mob nodded again, even more vigorously.

They waited patiently for Melvin to get dressed and get back in the story. "Shoot. No one even tells me when we're starting the story again." he muttered. The Angry Mob surrounded him.

"We've got you now, Melvin!" shouted Spyro. "The Angry Mob has triumphed again!"

"Oh yeah? Well you've forgotten one thing!" Melvin shot back. "We still have a few more chapters to go, how are you going to drag the story out now?"

"We'll...um..." Spyro began. Suddenly, Melvin's coach ran out of the bathroom.

"Dang plot..." He muttered. "Okay! Let's see some escape techniques, Melvin! Go! Go! Go!"

"You'll never escape, Melvin!" Hunter shouted.

"Oh no?" Melvin pointed. "Look!" The Angry Mob turned to see what he was pointing at. They didn't see anything.

"What are we look...oh foo." Elora groaned. While they had been looking, Melvin and Coach had escaped! It was all a clever ploy to distract them by pretending that there was something behind them that they needed to acknowledge!

"I think the readers understand that concept." Spyro told the narrator. "Come on guys! We've got to figure out where he went!"

"Do you think this might be a clue?" Bianca asked, pointing to a dotted line that began where Melvin was standing, wound all over the destroyed Home Depot, and off into the fake sunset.

"Quick! Follow that dotted line!"

"Hey! Around here we follow the yellow line!" yelled the yellow line, coming out of nowhere. The Angry Mob groaned at the appearance of the annoying line, and quickly tied him up and abandoned him at a drive-thru. Then, they were off to get Melvin!

Akiro- It's about dang time!

Me- I'm starting to run out of ideas.

Akiro- Oh no! C'mon, you've got three chapters to go. Where's your muse?

Me- Akiro, you ARE my muse!

Akrio- You make it sound like it's MY fault you update late.

Me- Actually, it is.

Akiro- No way, I'm not your muse for this story.

Me- Well, who is?

Akiro- I'll tell ya later.