Disclaimer: All characters recognized in the Harry Potter books are under copyright of J.K Rowling. The characters Coralie Dickinson, Vanessa Yates, Isabel Yates, Scott Bishop and Jessica Powis belong to me.
-oOo-
Chapter 5 – Acceptance & Unforgivable Apologies
Their footsteps clomped down the hall as the two fifth years made their way back to their common rooms, laughing and talking away – rather uncomfortably at first – but nevertheless, the ice was certainly breaking.
Princesa smiled shyly, looking up at the Slytherin with her eyes shining. She had never imagined him to step in and help her in such a reassuring manner. In fact, she was never sure if she would have seen him again after the morning. She sighed, to break the silence.
"Thanks for walking me back," she said, poking him playfully. "You didn't have to...it's not like Peeves hurt me, or anything – "
"Don't think on it," Tom replied with a chuckle. "I just felt like I should. To repay the favour."
The girl opened her mouth to answer, but found herself filled with confusion. Favour? she thought, frowning. What favour? He's the one who's done things for me since I've met him, not the other way around.
"What do you mean?" she asked, twiddling her fingers uncomfortably. "I haven't – "
"I've been looking for a good excuse to give that Peeves a piece of my mind," he told her, a smug grin curling itself onto his face. "Last year, I always felt that he was trying to find some way to make my term miserable, but the sly idiot always managed to dodge me before I had a chance to lunge."
Princesa giggled.
"So, thank you," he smirked, nudging her slightly with his elbow. "I feel a lot better now. Almost accomplished."
"Y-You're welcome," she muttered back, unsure of which way to look. For some reason, it felt as if the corridor had turned to ice, for all of her body felt frozen. Her cheeks flickered with flame.
Wait! she realised, suddenly aware and dumbstruck of how she was behaving. What am I doing? I'm blushing over everything he's saying! This is ridiculous...I shouldn't be embarrassed. I mean, he is my friend after all...he did say so. Yes – he did! She cleared her throat quickly and gazed at him.
"Did you mean that?" she blurted out, tucking a lone strand of hair behind her ear idly, her face a twisted frown. "When you said that we were friends...you did mean that, right?"
To her surprise, Tom actually laughed; a low, infectious laugh that managed to bring a small grin to Princesa's puzzled face. "Of course I meant it!" he murmured, chuckles tingling between the words. "Why? Did you think I was joking?"
"Well...no," Princesa admitted, for some reason finding much interest in the floor beneath her shined shoes. "It's just...well, I found it rather odd that someone like you...would, you know – ever want to become friends with someone...like, erm...me."
Another throbbing hush pounded in her ears. She despised situations like this. Why – why couldn't she keep a conversation going...lest a decent one? In her culture, any conversation that contained a pause meant that something was going wrong. She clenched her teeth.
Tom's brow fell; half out of bewilderment, the other out of sympathy. "And what exactly do you mean by that?"
"Oh – I don't know," the Ravenclaw giggled, attempting to direct the conversation into humorous tones once again, casually throwing the seriousness aside. "It's just...well, look at you. You're – "
"Erm, let me guess," Tom interrupted, quite brutally, his voice spiky and bitter. "A Slytherin?"
Princesa stared at him. Somewhere inside of her, it was almost as if she were listening to herself, and she...she felt like – Esterella. And because of this, she suddenly felt a disgusted taste sting her. Why does he think that I look at him in that way? I'd already told him that I wasn't like her – I'm not prejudiced!
"I don't think that at all!" she declared indignantly, brushing herself up straight with a fierce, hidden gleam in her eyes. She stood still on the spot, coming to a halt and staring upwards at the prefect, who loomed over her in size. "I've already told you a dozen times, I don't have any problems with those things! It's Essie who's all anti-Slytherin – not me!"
Tom blinked. "Well – "
"Don't start thinking that I'm just like her, because I would rather be lying dead than saying anything like that!" The girl continued, in her clear voice. Her fists were beginning to clench at her hips. "I'm not like her! We're different, her and me! We've...!"
Then she stopped, her voice trailing away. Her gaze flickered sadly and her eyes disappeared behind her lids, attracted to the ground. Her shoulders slumped as she sighed wearily.
"We've always been different," she finished, in rather a quiet, distant tone. "It's been the same since we first met...when we were both sorted into Ravenclaw on our first day at Hogwarts. She's always been braver...and more understanding than I could have ever been."
Tom frowned, listening.
"I can still remember," whispered Princesa, her voice a fluttered breeze, as if she were shaking the tree of her memories, and thousands of leaves were transcending down. A soft sigh escaped her lips. "I sat next to her in the Great Hall afterwards – at our table. I can remember...staring at her – in awe! Because..." she cut herself off again, beginning to gather crimson in her cheeks. "Because...she was the most amazing person I'd ever known."
The air was silent for a few moments. Tom was standing there, intently, his arms folded and an interested expression lighting up. He seemed to have been paying close attention to her story, and finally, he spoke.
"You're really that worried about her, aren't you?"
A crinkle of a smile pulled at the edges of her mouth. "Y-yeah. Just...just a bit – all right, a lot."
He smirked, unfolding his arms and dangling them at his sides.
"Anyway," she said quickly, shaking her head a little to clear it, and to change the subject. "I didn't want to bring all of that up. I was just...well, before, I was wondering why you would want to be friends with someone like me." She bit her lip and stared into his face, cautiously. She fidgeted, twisting a strand of her dark hair around her finger.
"But why would you think that?" Tom questioned, his eyebrow shooting upward. His words were rather injuring, but yet his voice was kind and intrigued. It made a difference, and Princesa breathed; her confidence expanded.
"I don't know," she admitted, shrugging. "Maybe...maybe it's because you're a prefect. Or – or maybe it's because you're really clever." She grinned nervously at him. "I've noticed how clever you seem to be, you always have the right answers!"
Tom looked away, unmoved by the compliment.
"And you're so brave!" the Ravenclaw gushed, tangling her fingers together again, as if they were involved in a rather bizarre battle. "The way that you talked to Peeves like that...I could never, never do that!"
He sighed. "Really," he repeated. "Don't think on it."
"That's why I guessed that you wouldn't be interested in being friends," Princesa confessed. "You're so great, Tom. And I'm..." her sentence dissolved on her tongue, and this time it was her turn to glance away, her eyes prickling. "I'm no one."
"Don't say that," he assured, placing a hand on her slouching shoulder.
"But it's true!" the girl practically wailed, spinning around and boring her blue eyes into his surprised face. His hand released her shoulder at the reaction. "I'm nothing like you!" she continued, her voice choking. "I'm not that clever, I rarely collect house points – I'm not a prefect...I can't even fly that well!"
Tom didn't interrupt her this time. Instead, he gazed back at the miserable girl, whose eyes were now shimmering with the warning of oncoming tears. Her self-pity was beginning to make him very uncomfortable, and didn't really know what he could say to batter her wall down. In fact, he just stood there, looking rather useless.
"I don't even belong here," she finished, tears piercing the corners of her eyes. "I-I should have never gotten that silly letter. I...I should have just stayed with momia – gone to boarding school. M-married a nice, rich hombre like she w-wanted me t-to!"
She buried her face in her palms, bursting into despondent weeps.
For a moment, Tom seemed unsure of what to do. He simply gaped at the sobbing student, looking as if he were about to say something...but didn't. He scratched his head uncomfortably, racking his brains for something encouraging to say, whilst she howled on the spot.
He cleared his throat. "Erm – "
"E-everyone h-hates m-m-me!" she wept, her voice on a balancing act, as if trapeze artists were practising on her vocal cords. "T-they all know I don't b-belong here! I s-should just g-go home where they w-won't have t-to look at m-me anymore!"
She exploded into another bout of tears.
He edged his hand out towards her, carefully, as if she might bite it off at any moment. "Don't cry," he said, in an almost deadpan voice, rubbing her shoulder awkwardly, darting his eyes away to check if anyone was watching, and secretly praying he didn't have to stand here next to her when she was in this state.
"I c-can't help it, T-Tom!"
"Of course you can," Tom said quickly in a false voice. "There's nothing to cry about." Then, thinking quickly, he turned to her desperately and added: "I don't hate you."
His strategic words seemed to have worked. The girl's breathing reduced, and she managed to remove her fingers away from her eyes with a few congested sniffs. The corners of her lips wormed into a watery smile as she gazed up at him.
"Really?" she choked.
He nodded, quickly. "Of course," he said, touching her hands and moving them down so as they were not barring her eyes. "I don't really see what there is to dislike, to be frankly honest."
A strange, emitting warmth suddenly seemed to billow, like a fiery, prickly breeze was embracing the inside of her body and spilling out through the pores. It travelled up towards her cheeks and stuck there, burning away.
It wasn't until a group of first-year Hufflepuff students ran past them in a spurt of giggles that they realised they had been standing there, dumbstruck, for a few good minutes.
Princesa giggled uncomfortably, tossing her long hair behind her shoulder.
"Well," Tom spoke up, brushing down his robes and straddling his schoolbooks beneath his arm. "As I said, I have homework...and I must be going." And saying that, he turned and began to head back towards the dungeons, flashing an awkward grin.
Standing frozen on the spot, the Ravenclaw said the first thing that came to her: "I-I'll see you again sometime, yes?" She shuddered at how hopeful it sounded.
"Yes...of course," he muttered back, his voice emotionless. And with that, he vanished into the corridors; as if he were a shadow himself and someone had snuffed out the candle he was using to live.
Her fingertips twitched in a feeble wave. In fact, anyone who may have passed her would have perhaps thought that she were paralyzed. A small, warm feeling stirred within her stomach and travelled to her knees, fixing her feet unstably to the ground.
What was this feeling? Could it possibly be...acceptance? Someone had claimed her as their friend, someone who she had only known for a few days. How could someone see her in such a way to call them their friend? And especially a Slytherin, those with a reputation unlike Tom's behaviour.
It was all so unreal at that moment.
"Bye," she whispered lamely as she walked back to her common room, a blank expression moulding her face, but hiding the shining amount of elation bubbling inside of her.
-oOo-
"No! Forget it, you rotten cow!"
"Look," Lorna said with exasperation. "I already said I was sorry – It was an accident! I didn't mean –"
"Oh, well that's understandable!" snapped Lucy, whirling on the girl with her eyes blazing. "You never mean anything, do you! You're an irrepressible cry-baby, that's all you are, Yates!"
Regen cleared his throat, shifting uncomfortably in the corner.
A crowd of Lorna's Hufflepuff friends, as well as a handful of Ravenclaws were packed around the Silver Knight, the entrance to the Ravenclaw tower. After the catastrophic events during the previous flying lesson, Lorna had offered to apologise for whatever she might have done to cause Esterella's plummet.
But Lucy was having none of it.
"I didn't intend to drag Montez down to the ground!" Lorna moaned. "I really was having trouble with my broom – the silly thing hates me –!"
"So, take it to counselling!" Drew threw in with a growl. A few of the smaller Ravenclaws sniggered.
"It's not my fault!" the girl protested, her voice strangely high-pitched. It was simple to notice that she was just about ready to burst into tears. "I...I just...I..."
At once, her Hufflepuff friends began to take control. There were a lot of angry mutterings all at once, and Danielle was sure she heard Coralie Dickinson, a Hufflepuff, snarl: "The nerve! No one talks to my best friend like that!" with a toss of her blonde hair.
Philip stood in front of the miserable Lorna defensively, allowing the girl to spin around and use Coralie as a shoulder to cry on. His eyes flashed with a raging, hazel light. "Leave her alone, already!" he barked. "It's not like she meant to do it on purpose! She's said that she's sorry – what more do you want!"
"How about you fall off your broom next time, Marshall!" came a voice from around the corner, shaking and trembling with rage.
Rosa turned, her mouth wide open. "Princesa!"
The girl stood leaning against the wall, her teeth clenched and her fists shaking. Her death gaze directed itself to Philip and she swore strongly in Spanish with a mighty, unleashed roar.
Philip scowled at her. "Don't look at me like that," he insisted, in a somewhat softer tone. "I just don't see the fairness of ganging up on Lorna, that's all." He backed off a little as the boiling Ravenclaw marched closer.
Danielle bit her lip. "Princesa –"
"Oh, no?" asked Princesa coldly, raising an eyebrow. "Doesn't she understand how to lift a broom up into the air? Hmm?"
"Don't you dare blame that on me!" Lorna blurted out in a splutter of tears, a deep frown embedded in her forehead. "I can't quite help it now if my broom hates me, can I!"
Princesa chuckled, long and spitefully, although it rang with its own pleasant sound. "It hates you?" she mocked, covering a hand over her mouth to hide her obnoxious laughter. "Learn to have a little self control – you're in your fifth year!"
Lorna opened her mouth to respond, but found herself hanging her head. "I don't learn fast..." she trailed off in a quiet, ashamed whisper.
"I'm a Muggleborn, just like yourself," continued the Ravenclaw, her giggles dissolving, and instead her voice now contained on ominous quality of authority. "I don't find any excuse. You just need to be more confident."
Without another word, poor Lorna's face screwed into one of misery and she whirled around on her foot, sprinting down the corridor in a flood of gentle sobs.
"Lorna – come back!" shouted Coralie, getting ready to take off after her with the other Hufflepuff students, who had all rushed to aid their friend. No sooner than she had disappeared around the corner, then she darted around again, shooting Princesa a poisonous glare.
"She was just trying to apologise," she hissed icily. "Perhaps you should try it sometime."
Princesa simply stood there, secretly feeling very, very displeased with herself. It's not like me to say things like that to others, she told herself. What came over me back there? Why...why would I say that to Lorna? She swallowed her guilt and stared at her shined shoes, twiddling her fingers.
"That wasn't very nice, Princesa," sighed Regen, stating the obvious.
In reply, she glanced over at him through the corner of her eye. "Well...perhaps she should have thought twice before distracting Montez."
"We were as much to blame as her," Rosa brought up, folding her arms across her chest. "We flew too close to those trees and disturbed the Doxys – we invaded their nest space."
Princesa said nothing. After a long silence, she simply shrugged. "I just want Essie to be all right," she choked, avoiding her friends' gazes. "I suppose I just...need someone to be mad at."
Silence. Princesa knew that they disapproved of her excuse.
However, their attention was distracted by the sound of tapping footsteps coming from the direction that the Hufflepuffs had disappeared down. All at once, two older (and rather similar looking) girls appeared, both wearing shiny, silver Prefect badges. They spotted the crests on their robes; Gryffindor and Hufflepuff. The tall girl bearing the Gryffindor crest had piercing light green eyes and a smooth, chiselled face. Drew remembered finding her very attractive.
The slightly smaller girl, with Hufflepuff tattooed on her robes, held the same piercing gaze, only this time, they emitted a blue light. Both girls had the same ginger coloured hair, the difference being that the taller girl had her hair cropped short, just below her chin, whilst the other's long hair rippled over her shoulders like a sunset wave.
Regen groaned and clenched his teeth. Not only were these girls Prefects, but they were both the sisters of Lorna Yates. Typical.
"What's all this we hear about you and Lorna's little spat?" questioned the Gryffindor Prefect, Vanessa. "She's devastated back there. What exactly did you say?"
"Nothing!" Princesa growled. The last thing that she wanted was to involve Prefects in on her business. "Just a minor disagreement."
"I'd like to see what a major one was," scoffed the other sister, Isabel.
Danielle, the peacemaker, decided that this was her cue to step in. "We don't want any trouble," she insisted in her calm voice. "We all have homework to catch up on, and we don't wish to be out here quarrelling all night."
Vanessa tapped her fingers on her folded arms.
"I'm sure this mess will be sorted out tomorrow," Danielle continued – with a tiny grimace at Princesa – "but until then, let them sleep on it and everything will be fine."
Isabel Yates sighed, her forgiving nature shining through. "All right," she whispered, believing honest Danielle's explanation. "But let it be sorted out tomorrow, or whenever you happen to pass her by again. She can be upset quite easily and we don't want any hullabaloo in the first week."
"Completely agree!" chimed in Drew, staring at Vanessa.
But Rosa wasn't listening to them. Instead, her focus was fixed on the tall, skinny-legged boy with dark blonde hair running over to the crowd, an elated grin on his face. She groaned and hid her face in her hand, pressing her lips together in embarrassment.
"Go on in, you had better make a start on your homework," Vanessa said with one of her rare smiles. "I'm just glad we – arruughh!"
Her sentence was snapped in two at that moment because the older student who had been racing down the hall leapt beside her and wrapped his arms around Vanessa's waist. His green eyes lit up with ecstasy as he pulled her close to him, gently kissing her on the cheek with a playful smirk. His robes bore the crest of Gryffindor, and not only did he carry a Prefect badge, but also one that proudly shone 'Head Boy'.
"Scott!" laughed Vanessa, shoving her boyfriend's shoulder in frustration. "You scared me half to death – I've told you not to do that!"
He smirked mischievously, resting his chin on her shoulder. "Sorry, it never gets old."
"Well, it does for me," his girlfriend replied, poking his nose and causing his face to screw up in surprise. Isabel giggled uncontrollably.
Scott's face brightened up as he caught sight of the Ravenclaws gathered around the Silver Knight. He smiled smoothly and waved, innocently though mockingly, at one of them. "Hi there, little sis," he chuckled.
Rosa twisted her face into a painful smile before quickly wiping it away again.
-oOo-
"Oh, thank God you're here!" squealed a young third year girl when Regen entered, her short auburn hair disarray in all places. "I'm having so much trouble with this dratted Charms homework, Regen!"
Regen chuckled and smirked at his sister, shaking his head a little. She was certainly not afraid to admit when she was having trouble with something (which happened more often than never). She had his same light brown eyes, but had a little bit of an attitude that he could never remember experimenting with.
"All right, Jessica, come here then."
But before that Jessica could discuss her problems with her magical education, she darted her eyes over the group of Ravenclaws that had just entered the room. Her face fell as she noticed that someone was missing, someone who she was very close friends with.
"W-where's Luce?"
In unison and due to reaction, they all rotated their heads around like spinning tops, searching for a sign of Esterella's sister. That's odd, thought Danielle.
"We thought that she might be here," Princesa replied, her face wrought with confusion.
Jessica gave a small shrug of her shoulders. "I-It doesn't matter," she murmured, in a rather distant voice. "I'm sure she'll...turn up soon. Come on, I really need to get this finished." And she walked back to her seat, grabbing her brother's wrist and hauling him to her open books and ink-blotted parchment sheets.
Danielle and Rosa exchanged puzzled glances before following.
-oOo-
Her fingers traced idly over the wrinkled bed sheets, mingling cresently with her deep sighs. She felt the prickle of thorny tears stinging her eyes and she blinked them away. She wasn't going to cry. She had told herself that she wouldn't.
Damn that Doxy, she thought bitterly. Damn everything – damn sister. Should have stayed on your broom, you cow.
Lucy brushed a few strands of her blonde hair out of her eyes, staring down at her unconscious sister on the Infirmary bed. Esterella lay there perfectly still, as if nothing in the world caused her any problems. Her breath was gentle and easy; relaxing, as if she were in the earth's most beautiful sleep.
"You're an idiot," Lucy mumbled, fidgeting with a piece of screwed up paper in her hands. "You're supposed to be clever. But you're just...so stupid." She turned away resentfully, squeezing her lids shut, a burning feeling welling in her fingers.
Reluctantly, she opened the piece of tattered parchment in her hand, squinting at times to read the juvenile script that lay upon it. On top of that, the condition of the material also made it rather difficult to decipher:
Essie,
You're the bestest sister the worlde cud ever ask 4, I'd neva change u for anything and I love you so very very much, even when u get mad at me and when I get mad at u I still luv u no matta wot
Lotsa love
Luce xxxxxxxxx
With another repressed sigh, she folded up the parchment (which was also covered in something brown and hard) and placed it next to her sister, neatly under the sheets.
With that, she got to her feet and began to make her way out of the Hospital Wing, having done what she needed to do. She fingered the door handle uncomfortably on her way out, brushing away a few droplets of threatening tears that lingered on the edge of her eyes.
"Stupid."