Hello peoples! Sorry I'm taking so long to update! However writing these is a very long process. First I have to stop being lazy, and then I have to get my ideas together. Once that's done I take the ideas I have (Thanks those who have given me ideas Kunoichi 008, sToLeKyOspAnTs and DemonZabuza1! YOU ROCK) and try to string them together! I also have to make the stories make sense and get Kunoichi 008 to look them over for me (she's my happy BETA reader). It's a long process, but you guys are sure patient! I should probably have my bloopers updated soon (they are so hard to think of) anywho thanks all who reviewed! I heart you all! sToLeKyOspAnTs: lmao! You come up with the craziest ideas in the world! But DON'T STOP! Your ideas are so cool and they help me update faster ! Be sure to see your idea in the next one! DemonZabuza1: You my friend are a genius! No one has thought of that yet, not even me! What's more is that you just thought of our first Gaara one! Congratulations! Because you thought of this brilliant idea this one is dedicated to you. Hope you enjoy! If you have any more ideas feel free to send 'em! Shadow-sensei: lol! Of course you wouldn't have! So how is the new Icha Icha Paradise? I heard Jiraiya had a big inspiration for it. I wonder what it was? –thinks while looking at the sky- Anywho hope you enjoy this one! coolRiku: Haha thanks! Thanks for reviewing! If you have any ideas feel free to send them to me! Enjoy!Kunoichi 008: Yes, I'm glad you enjoyed it my friend...Remind me to call you later!
Thanks to all who reviewed! I hope you like this one! Feel free to review and send me ideas! Enjoy!
(A/N: This is kind of important. The time line is going to start getting mixed up now. I know the first three were in an order of some sort, but the ideas are getting better and they are moving either forward in the timeline or backwards. So I was thinking that I'll try to put these in order as much as I can. To do that I'm going to have to switch peoples ideas around so that the stories will connect. So don't be disappointed if I haven't posted your ideas yet. They will be posted, just not yet. Thanks for your patience. Also this chapter may contain a little spoiler! You've been warned! I don't like flames so don't blame me!)
This Chapter is Dedicated to: DemonZabuza1
You get the honor of coming up with the first Gaara idea! Congrats!
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto! If I did Itachi and Kisame would be like this all the time!
(A/N: This is the same night as the last chapter)
Revenge of Gaara:
It was midnight in the sand. The Kazekage was making his way to his siblings room. He had two padded bras strapped around his waist. Each one had a over filled water balloon in each cup. His siblings had begun to piss him off. Since he couldn't kill them (One: their his siblings. Two: He didn't want to mess up his hair) he decided to take a leaf out of Naruto's book and prank them. Gaara silently made his way to his sisters room; almost giddy with anticipation.
Outside Gaara's house…mansion…whatever he lives in:
Deidara: "So he lives here…yeah…" -the blond says observing the house/mansion from a neighboring roof-.
(A/N: Is Deidara a man? I can't tell. One manga scan says their female, the other says male…it's confusing. I personally thought he/she was a woman. If anyone can tell me I'd be grateful…I'm too lazy to check myself and I don't have a internet connection on the computer I write on!)
Sasori: "Let's make this quick…My soap opera's on and we get to find out if Matt is dead or not!"
Deidara and Sasori make their way to Gaara's house. They were flying quietly over the sleeping sound village. Suddenly…
Deidara: -cough…hack…cough-
Sasori: "What's the matter with you?"
Deidara: "I just swallowed a bug…yeah…"
Sasori: -sweat drop- "You're an idiot."
Deidara: "So I've been told…yeah."
Sasori: "Why do you say that after every sentence?"
Deidara: "Say what…yeah?"
Sasori: "THAT! It's pissing me off!"
Deidara: "What is…yeah?"
Sasori: "You keep saying it!"
Deidara: -looks at Sasori confused- "I still don't know…yeah."
Sasori: -makes a frustrated noise- "YEAH!"
Deidara: "Yeah what?...yeah"
Sasori: "You keep saying YEAH!" –yells pointing at her-
Deidara: "Oh…"
Sasori: "Thank-"
Deidara: "…yeah"
Sasori: -screams in frustration-
Deidara: "fine I'll stop…word!"
Sasori: -looks at her confused- "What the hell did you just say?"
Deidara: "Nothing…word!"
Sasori: -rubs his temples before looking back to Deidara- "Why are you saying 'word' at the end of your sentences?"
Deidara: "What word?...word!"
Sasori: "THAT WORD! WORD!"
Deidara: "you're confusing me…word!"
Sasori: "I am so ready to kill you right now! If you don't stop saying 'Word' at the end of every sentence I swear I'll kill you and it'll look like a bloody accident!" –Sasori threatens-
Deidara: -looks disgruntled- "What am I supposed to say after every sentence then?"
Sasori: "Something that doesn't annoy me!"
Deidara: "What doesn't annoy you?"
Sasori: "NOTHING! EVERYTHING ANNOYS ME!" –anime vein-
Deidara: "Fine…if you don't choose something I will" –looks around and sees a lit candle in a window- "…fire!"
Sasori: "Fire? Why did I get teamed up with you?" –he moans pitifully looking up at the sky-
Deidara: "Because no one else wanted to be teamed up with you; I didn't have a choice, because I was in the bathroom when they pulled the names out of the hat. Fire!"
Sasori: -groans and covers his ears to Deidara's nonsense and pitiful rambling-
The two irritable Akatsuki members land on Gaara's roof, but find themselves in a predicament.
Gaara: "who are you?" –standing on the roof with his water balloon holsters on-
Sasori: "Ah the Bijuu…we're here for you."
Gaara: -observes them- "So…you're not here to visit?"
Sasori: -Anime vein- "This guy is as dense as Deidara…" –Forces a smile on his puppets mouth (A/N: Remember the real body is hiding in that puppet armor)- "No, we're here to take you to be a human sacrifice! Doesn't that sound great?" –says sarcastically-
Gaara: "uhh…no?" –his hand wanders to his water balloons- "These guys are freakier then me…" -he thinks keeping his cold demeanor up-
Deidara: "Why don't you just come with us quietly…FIRE!"
Gaara: "Don't mind of I do!" –chucks the water balloons at them-
Sasori and Deidara, both, get hit square in the face with the water balloons.
Deidara: "OH GOD MY MASCARA IS RUNNING! Wait…this isn't water!" –begins to itch skin- "Why is my skin so itchy…yeah"
Sasori: "Back on that word again?"
Deidara: "SHUT UP! YEAH! IF YOU DIDN'T COMPLAIN SO MUCH WE WOULDN'T HAVE GOTTEN HIT BY THOSE WATER BALLOONS! WHICH, if you didn't notice, AREN'T FILLED WITH WATER! YEAH!"
Gaara summons his sand.
Gaara: "You guys messed up my prank…now you DIE!" -He commands the sand to catch them-
Sasori: -growls- "Time to retreat! MOVE IT!"
Deidara and Sasori jump on a clay bird and begin to fly away from the Kazekage's house/mansion…whatever it is. Deidara was still trying to figure out what the strange substance in the water balloons was.
Shukaku: "What did you put in to those water balloons? I wasn't paying attention."
Gaara: "Well at first I did put water in them…but then I realized that people may think there's a lot of water on this earth, but really there isn't much at all. I really didn't want to waste any more water so I went back to the kitchen and emptied them. I was trying to think of a substitute for the water when I found a whole bunch of liquid stuff under the sink!" –he says to Shukaku who was listening very closely. Gaara didn't care if it looked like he was talking to himself- "So I mixed in a bunch of stuff! Vim, turpentine, vinegar, windex and I threw in some molasses and honey to make it sweet!"
Shukaku: And you were going to throw that stuff at your siblings?"
Gaara: "Pfft, not anymore…those two bastards forced me to use my genius techniques on them…I guess I could always put a scorpion down Temari's shirt and set Kankurou's dolls on fire…" –Gaara mutters to himself as he goes back inside-
Meanwhile…
Deidara: -still scratching her skin- "I know you blame this on me…but this is all your fault Sasori-sempai! Yeah…" –she accuses as she continues to scratch her skin. It had begun to turn red.- "What the hell did that kid put in those water balloon! Why is this stuff sticky? Yeah." –she exclaims trying to wipe the liquid off-
A bee comes out of nowhere and lands on Deidara.
Deidara: "Get away! Yeah!" –she smacks it, but misses and it lands on her again. Soon another bee shows up, then another one, then another one, then a WHOLE flock shows up.- "What the hell! Yeah!"
The bees begin to land on Sasori too.
Sasori: "It seems that whatever that boy put in those balloons…is attracting bees…" –he merely watches Deidara get attacked by bees. Since he was protected by the puppet armor; he just watched as Deidara swat at the bees pitifully.- "Damn…I don't have any popcorn…but I do have this!" –pulls out a camera phone and happily records Deidara and her predicament.-
THE END (for now…)
Another chapter done! I hope you guys liked it. I tried to get as much humour in it as possible. I hope you guys don't mind the OOCness too much. I made Gaara pretty OOC…but I meant to do it! So it's all good. So if you guys have any comments and ideas; feel free to review! I always like ideas!