Title- A Potion-Master's Vacation
Rating- G
Summary- Severus Snape never leaves the school during the summer. Ever. At all. Absolutely not. Well, maybe just this once. One-shot.
A/N- Pre-HPB. Well, pre-everything, really.
"Severus, are you quite sure you don't need to leave the castle this summer? I'm sure we could get along just fine without you for a few months" Dumbledore's tone was concerned, almost paternal and it was driving Snape insane. The two men were sitting in the Headmaster's office having a spot of thank-Merlin-the-students-are-gone-now-down-to-some-real-work tea, as they did at the end of every school year. Minerva had declined to attend, saying that she had far too much work to do. Secretly, Snape was disappointed she had not joined them. At least then Albus would have had someone else to pick on as well.
"Albus, those dithering morons you refer to as students have left my potion stocks, classroom, and the dungeon area in general in complete disarray. The restocking of my cabinets alone will take several weeks. Furthermore, I fail to see why my choice in summer accommodation has always disturbed you so much. I stay at Hogwarts every summer, and this one will be no different." Snape said, a hint of irritation creeping into his voice. They had this same discussion every summer; why did Albus continue to bring it up?
"My dear boy, I am simply concerned that you do not get out enough. You should be enjoying life, getting out of this musty school and seeing the world. In my youth, Madagascar was the most popular holiday resort. Aberforth and I really quite enjoyed our time there. Why not get away for a while?"
"Headmaster," Snape sighed, selecting another biscuit from the tray and placing it on his saucer, "I truly have no wish to parade my self around any sort of holiday resort. I consider Hogwarts my home, and distinctly enjoy spending time in it that is not profoundly marred by the presence of miscreants."
Dumbledore took another sip of his tea and regarded Snape for a long moment before speaking again. "I assume you are aware, Severus, of Potion Master's symposium being held next week in Korea?"
For the first time since entering the headmaster's office, Snape didn't cringe at the topic of discussion. Instead, he warily responded to Dumbledore's enquiry.
"I'm hardly likely to allow such an important event to escape my notice, Albus. Such gatherings are held only once every seventy years, and it was at the last one that the most final version of Polyjuice Potion was unveiled. Why do you ask?"
Dumbledore's smile was verging on the beatific. "You won't be attending though? It is, as you say, an extremely important event. In fact," Here Dumbledore leaned forward, his tone becoming conspiratorial, "I had wanted to go myself, just to see what new revelations would come up this time. Alas, age and infirmity come to us all, and I am unfortunately not able to attend. Would that I had your youth, Severus!"
Snape barely resisted the urge to roll his eyes at Dumbledore's theatrics. As if the old man ever felt a day over eighty! Still though, the symposium would be an excellent opportunity to get opinions on the wolfsbane potion he had in the works.
"But of course, you are too busy to go. It truly is a shame, Severus. Well, perhaps Professor Trelawny will be available to go. Obviously, she does not have your background in the subject, but as a Hogwarts representative I'm sure…"
"That will not be necessary, Albus. I will be attending the symposium. Leave Sybill locked up in her tower with her tea leaves; I should hope that is the closest to potion making that she ever comes. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must go prepare for my departure. The Potion Brewers of Europe club are holding a discussion in anticipation of the symposium, and I would be remiss if I did not attend." Snape downed the rest of his tea and snatched the biscuit that had been sitting untouched on his saucer.
"Yes, yes, dear boy, along with you. Do let me know what your fellow masters think of you wolfsbane concoction, won't you? Oh, and if you should happen to see Minerva before you leave, would you send her up to speak with me? It is such a shame that she could not join us this afternoon." With that, Dumbledore waved Snape out of the office and settled down into his chair. A few minutes later, there was a knock on his door and, without waiting for a reply, Minerva entered.
"I just passed Severus in the corridor and he was muttering to himself about stirring rods. I take it you convinced him to go?"
"Yes," Dumbledore said, "You know Severus, he never turns down an opportunity to pick up a few new potion recipes. He hardly required any persuasion at all. Of course, that was the easy part of the plan."
"The easy part? What on earth is more difficult than getting Severus out of Hogwarts for one day, let alone ten?"
"Why, dismantling all his security wards around the dungeons and getting the decorations up before he gets back. We were simply fortunate that the conference dates fell when they did. A week later and we would never have had time to get things in order for his birthday!"
"We'll have it done in time Albus, and I'm sure he'll love it." Minerva however, sounded more like she was trying to convince herself.
Three Weeks Later:
"What the hell happened to my dungeon!"