Summary: Post 'Serenity'. Zoe's overcontrolling her grief. River helps her work through it.
Notes: Not to sure where this particular plot bunny came from, but I decided to run with it. Guess I'm still irked that they killed Wash.
Disclaimer: If I owned it, it'd still be on TV. Stupid Fox network.
GRIEVING
By screaminheathen69
Somewhere out there, in the deeps between worlds where the starships live, the vessel Serenity coasted on her way to her next port of call, leaving a dead world in her wake.
It was late into the ship's night, some of the crew already asleep in their bunks. Zoe, who had the late watch, made her way onto the bridge. She wasn't surprised to find River there, perched in her now usual spot in the co-pilot's chair. The girl was a never-ending source of amazement, although after having witnessed her wade through a horde of Reavers, the fact that she could pilot a starship shouldn't have been all that surprising.
It had been a week since they departed that world, two weeks since Wash's death. Zoe, ever the strong one, had retreated into herself. She reminded Mal of the old Zoe, the battle-hardened, bitter soldier he'd known back in the day, and it worried him. She wouldn't allow herself to grieve, and that was just a recipe for problems down the road.
River was sitting with her knees drawn up to her chest, staring down at something. Zoe started to say something, but froze when she saw what River was staring at. She was holding two of Wash's toy dinosaurs. The pain welled up, and Zoe turned away, fighting for control.
"I'm sorry," River whispered.
Zoe stopped, back still to the girl. "What?"
"I'm sorry. My fault he's dead. I'm sorry."
Zoe took a deep, steadying breath and went to River, kneeling beside her and resting a hand on her knee. "No, it's not. We all chose to go there. The Alliance caused all of this. Their fault he's gone, not yours."
River scrunched up her face. "My fault we were there. Went there because of me."
"You might've got us started down that road, but like I said, we chose to go. We all agreed it had to be done. My baby didn't die for nothin', he died doin' somethin' needed doing. Wasn't your fault."
River glanced at Zoe, then back at the dinosaurs. "Miss him. Miss his laugh. Miss the funny."
"Oh, sweetie, so do I," said Zoe, fighting tears.
"Nobody'd think less of you."
"What?" Zoe asked, confused at the change of subject.
"If you cried. Not a soul in the 'verse'd think less of you if you cried. He was a good man. It's okay to grieve."
The floodgates opened, and Zoe started sobbing uncontrollably. River knelt down and wrapped her arms around Zoe, and the two wept together, Zoe for the love of her life, River for the loss of her friend and for her friend's loss.
Down in the passageway, Mal and Simon watched, both with a sense of relief. Mal nudged the doctor's shoulder. "Y'know, that sister of yours is one amazing lady."
Simon nodded, smiling. "Yes. She is." The two men made their way back to the galley, leaving the two women to grieve in peace. Sometimes the most valuable thing in the universe is a shoulder to cry on.
'To thee no star be dark...'