Ten times, Mary said to herself as she ended yet another voicemail message to Danny's phone. Ten times she had tried calling him since she had spoken to Mike, and he hadn't answered once. She had even tried his home number too many times to count, even though she knew he wouldn't be there, just to be sure. She understood why he'd be ignoring his cell, or if he had turned it off completely, but she just needed to speak to him, needed to hear his voice, because the more time that passed by…
She had known him forever and at times she would think that she knew absolutely everything there was about him, and then he'd do something completely unpredictable and she'd be left wondering to herself if she really knew anything. That was one of the things that was scaring her right now.
It wasn't completely out of the realms of possibility that he'd do something stupid. Sometimes he was even known for it. When they were teenagers and he'd found out what his father had done to her, he'd beaten the crap out of him so badly that her father had been in the hospital for a week. When Greg died, Danny went after the bastards responsible – not that she blamed him. It just didn't seem to compute with him in these situations that it might be dangerous and that he could be hurt. He was always running on adrenaline, and that wasn't particularly a good thing.
She shifted in her seat for the thousandth time on the short flight, peering out of the window as the Vegas skyline came into view once again. She had been so sure that everything would be different when she got back here, when the Montecito was gone. She was so glad that, for now at least, it was the same because she couldn't stand the thought of something else that she loved being gone.
She could feel her fingertips gripping at the leather arms of the chair she was in, although she didn't even realise she was doing it until Jake's hand moved over hers to still it. She glanced at him, a small smile on her face, for his benefit only, because she really couldn't see anything to smile about. She was grateful to him, though, for the fact that he was doing this for her, and for his company. If he hadn't been kind enough to fly her back home, she'd probably still be sat in a Hawaiian airport, pacing and fidgeting. She was doing the same thing now, of course, minus the pacing, but at least she was closer to home. Besides, with Jake here she could stop herself from thinking about all of those things that she was scared of.
Things like how much she was going to miss Danny's dad. It seemed dumb if you said it aloud, that you were going to miss your best friend's dad, but it was entirely different when he just so happened to be the only guy she had ever trusted, other than Danny. He was the guy who made sure she ate dinner when she was at their house all the time when they were growing up. He was the one who hugged her when she cried, even when she couldn't tell him why she was crying.
He was the one who took her in when things went bad with her father. She had never told him what happened to her, but she was sure Danny had, although neither of them let on about it. He even gave Danny an alibi when the police came knocking after they had found her father, bruised and bloody in the kitchen after his beating. Her father wouldn't tell, of course, because aside from getting beaten up by a teenager, he'd been worried about the police finding out about his sick, dirty little secret.
He was the one who had called her every week ever since she had moved out of the house, just to check in, and called her his daughter when he introduced her to clients when she dropped by the site to say hi. He was the one who said 'finally!' when she and Danny told him about their engagement, and told her she'd always be part of the family when they broke up. He was the one who warned her when she met Jake that he'd better take care of her or he'd have to hurt him.
Every time she had felt her father's hands on her, it had disgusted her so much that she'd think to herself that all dads were like that, that was what they did, but then she'd spend time at the McCoy's and remember that it wasn't true, and she'd tell herself to always remember that.
He was the guy she considered her father, because the one she was born with sure as hell wasn't worthy of the name. The reason why she was the person she was…that was in part because of him. He was the guy who made her want all the things she did from Danny – husband, kids, home – because he made her see what it was really like to be in a family.
He had done so much for her, and yet she had been relieved when Mike told her he was dead. Mike had told her that something had happened, that there had been an accident, and her thoughts had immediately jumped to Danny. She had felt her heart in her throat and had felt all the air rush out of her body at the thought that he was gone or hurt. She swallowed down a pang of guilt brought on by thinking about it. When she found out it wasn't him, she had been able to breathe again. She had been relieved, and now the guilt was eating her from the inside out.
She didn't realise she was crying again until a tear fell from her face and landed in the hand that was now sitting in her lap. She quickly dried it on her jeans, bringing the hand to her cheek to wipe away the others before they fell.
Jake squeezed her hand again, just as the pilot announced they were starting their descent and that they'd be touching down shortly.
She felt Jake's arm nudge her, prompting her to look at him.
"You okay?" he asked her.
She smiled, "No," she told him.
He just nodded, and held her hand tighter.