Chapter 6- Unreal

"… so he was like, 'It's him or me', and I was like 'It is so him', and he just totally freaked out, it was so funny, don't you think, Mi?"

"Huh? Yeah… funny," Hermione said listlessly. She hadn't actually heard a word of Chas's "funny" story- she was too busy focusing on the worry that had constantly hung over her mind for the past few days. Well, it wasn't a worry so much as a blinding panic- what would she say the next time she saw him? Would he even want to speak to her, seeing as she was such a know-it-all chatterbox? Had he told anyone? Would it sort itself out or not? Would she ever get over her…feelings for him? She couldn't bear to think of it as love- it made it seem more permanent somehow, and that was the last thing she wanted.

"So have you heard from Ron yet?" Liz asked, with a slight sneer. Hermione jumped at the sound of his name- could Liz read her thoughts?

"No, no I haven't," she said, trying to hide her blushes. She hated talking about Ron with them.

"Oh, how sad," Vicki smirked. "Is he not feeling better yet?"

"No," Hermione smiled, resisting the urge to punch Vicki square on the nose.

"Funny," Liz continued, with a smirk matching her sister's, "I didn't think that measles could come on so quickly. But I'm sure he'll be better soon."

"Mmmm… he probably won't be coming back, though," Hermione said, improvising wildly. "He's going to visit his grandmother in a few days."

Liz and Vicki exchanged a look that said quite clearly that they didn't believe her. She had stopped caring though. They could judge away all they wanted. She didn't care if the entire neighbourhood knew about her argument with Ron. All she wanted was for Ron to forgive her. She wasn't even hoping that he'd want to go out with her anymore- all she wanted was for things to be back to how theywere before. She'd rather have him as a friend only than as nothing at all. She just didn't want to lose him.

"Look, I'm not feeling too great either," she said, standing up suddenly. "I think I'll call it a day. I'll see you tomorrow, or something."

She left Chas's living room, closing the door behind her, before collecting her jacket and walking the few hundred yards home. She felt totally and utterlymiserable- she didn't know whom to blame. Was it her own fault? Or was Ron to blame? He had lied, after all… but had she over-reacted? He was only looking out for her. She wished she could just go back to when Ron had kissed her… maybe if she had acted differently, things might have been so much better.

She entered her house, dumping her jacket beside the coat stand. No one else was home- both of her parents were still at work. She made herself a cup of tea in the kitchen, trying to hold back the tears of misery that she so constantly felt stinging her eyes these days. She wasn't going to cry again. She was just being stupid. She could live through this- it wasn't such a big deal. She had to get over it and move on. If she kept bursting into tears without the slightest provocation she would be miserable forever.

She walked up the stairs to her bedroom, being careful not to spill her tea. She needn't have bothered. The second she entered her bedroom, she dropped the entire mug in shock.

"Ron?" she whispered, looking at the familiar figure standing awkwardly beside her dressing table. He didn't appear to have noticed her. Perhaps she was hallucinating- definitely not a good sign. Her fears were allayed, however, when he spun around to look at her, a guilty expression on his face.

"Erm… sorry," he muttered, his face turning scarlet. "No one was home, so I just, erm, climbed through the window-" he pointed at her bedroom window, which was indeed half open. "I knocked over one of the ornaments on your desk when I climbed through, though, and it smashed. I've managed to find all of the pieces but one. I'm so sorry- I'll pay for it-"

"Never mind that, what are you doing here?" Hermione said, not noticing the pool of tea that was soaking into the carpet around her.

"I came to… to apologise," Ron said, carefully avoiding her gaze. "It was stupid of me to say those things- I didn't really mean them. I don't actually know what I was thinking, so don't bother asking. Your guess is as good as mine. But H-"

"How on earth did you get down here?" she cut in, shaking her head with a disbelieving smile.

"I took the train down this morning, then I walked to your house. I didn't actually tell Mum, though- she'll have a fit when she finds out," Ron said, smiling slightly. "Anyway-"

"But it's almost twenty miles from the station!"

"Yeah… it took a while," Ron said bashfully. "It seemed a lot shorter when your mum took me in the car…but that's not the p-"

"You are unreal," Hermione said with a smile. "Someone really broke the mould when they made you. So, what were you going to say?"

Ron opened his mouth to speak, but Hermione cut him off again.

"I should really mop that tea up- if it stains Mum'll do her nut! I'll be back in a second!" She skipped out of the room, a huge smile on her face.

"I love you," Ron whispered as she closed the door behind her. It was pointless-he obviously wasn't going to get a word in edgeways. It didn't matter, anyway.Hermione was happy, and that was all that mattered to him. All he wanted was to see her smile again. He hadn't been able to sleep before, thinking about what he had said to her. It was tearing him up inside, how cruel he had been to her. All he could see when he closed his eyes was the look of hatred and shame that she had worn when she looked at him. He never wanted to see her look at him in that
way again. He couldn't live with it. He needed to apologise, as much for his own sake as for hers.

Perhaps it was for the best that he hadn't told her how he really felt. He just hadn't anticipated that she'd be home so early. He hadn't intended to speak to her, anyway. He looked at the letter, hidden behind his back in the palm of his right hand.

Dear Hermione,
I'm so sorry for the things I said to you. I didn't mean a word of them.
Everything I said in that argument was one giant lie. I know you don't just go
around kissing other guys, and you don't talk too much, and I'm sorry for saying
such stupid things. In fact, let's just say I'm sorry for every horrible,
idiotic thing I've done and said to you since I've known you. I'm not sure
there's enough parchment in the world for me to list and apologise for every one
of them.

I'm sorry, too, for not giving you straight answers to your questions Possibly
the only thing I said during that argument that was true is that Jake isn't good
enough for you. No one is. No one on this earth deserves you, Hermione. No one
could possibly ever understand you and treat you the way you should be treated.
But I think that of all the people in the world, I'd be the one who tried the
hardest.

I love you, Hermione, and I have for quite some time, even if I haven't always
shown it in the way I should. And I will always love you, no matter what, even
if you don't love me back. And I'm sorry if telling you makes you feel
uncomfortable, but it's true, and I'm not going to lie to you anymore.

Make whatever you want of what I've just told you. If you don't feel the same
way, that's fine. Just let me know and I'll never mention this again, and
hopefully things'll go back to the way they were before this whole messy ordeal.
I'm not saying I'll stop loving you, but I'll try not to let it get in the way
of our friendship.

But if you do feel the same, then please tell me, and I'll do everything in my
power to make sure that you get exactly what you deserve, and I won't let
anything or anyone hurt you ever again, including myself.

Please just let me know,

Love Ron

He scrunched the letter back up, and threw it in the bin beside Hermione's desk. Leaving the letter wasn't a good idea. Things were back to being as near normal as they got in his life. He didn't want to jeopardise things by taking a chance and risking losing her again. Besides, leaving a letter on her desk was such a cowardly thing to do. This was the sort of thing you had to say face to face, and he just wasn't up to doing it. Not yet, anyway.

Hermione entered the room, armed with a bottle of cleaning spray and copiousamounts of kitchen roll. He bent down to help her soak up the stain on the carpet, and as he did so she gave him a smile, the kind that made his heart do little leaps inside his chest. It was the sort of smile that she only smiled when she was genuinely happy. And provided that Hermione was happy, he was happy.

"So, are we friends again?" she grinned, holding out her hand for him to shake. He could risk it, he guessed, but was it worth it? It was all right if she did like him, but if she didn't, he knew in spite of himself that he would panic and say something stupid. And he didn't think their friendship would be so easy to repair the second time around. It was better just to go back a few steps than to risk losing it all.

He took her hand and shook it. "Friends."

There was plenty of time left to be more.

A/N- Okay, here's the deal...originally, this was the final chapter of this fic. However, by popular demand, I ended up writing a brief epilogue, which I shall post in a little bit.

For anyone looking for something else to read, I've just posted a one-shot; it follows up my other fic A New Arrival, but it also works on it's own, and it is effectively a prologue for another fic I'm planning on posting, so go over and read it! Its short and plenty cheery!