Disclaimer: I do not own Shaman King

CHAPTER TWO – Anna Feels

"Yoh." Anna sobbed uncontrollably into the couch pillow she had her face buried in.

Ren stepped in awkwardly. He slowly sat next to her and placed a hand on her shoulder. She didn't respond when he shook her so he finally picked her up by the arms forcefully and threw away the pillow, drawing her into his arms in what he assumed was a comforting gesture. She clenched his shirt in both hands and cried on his shoulder. He patted her back lightly and whispered soothing words in her ear.

A few hours later he shook her again, but she didn't move. He brushed a few strands of fine blonde hair out of her face and saw she was sleeping peacefully. He stared a moment at how calm and happy her features looked in her sleep, wondering how such angelic beauty could be found anywhere on this earth. He scooped her up and swept her off to her room, gently placing the covers over her in her bed. (bed, not futon, I like it better that way!) She smiled slightly and he knew her dreams were good ones.

"Sleep well, Anna-san." he whispered and tip-toed out of the room. Back downstairs, he found the others staring at him.

"What?" he growled.

"What do we do, now?" Manta asked. Ren sighed and leaned his head against a wall, mumbling something incoherent.

"What?" Horo Horo asked.

"I said, I don't know!" he snapped, eyes flashing angrily.

"How is she?" Lyserg asked, eager to change the subject.

"Exhausted. She's been crying all afternoon, she's asleep, now." he answered.

They agreed to try and have a semi-decent meal before retiring to their beds, and ate a modest dinner of fried salmon in silence. Afterwards, Ren went up to his assigned room to rest, it had been a tiring day. The others were occupied with the TV, which had somehow managed to catch Yoh's death scene in film, and was broadcasting it.

Ren woke to an odd sniffling sound, and someone speaking through the thin walls. He glanced at his clock, 2:00 AM. Groaning, he stumbled out of bed and managed to pull on a robe, (he's only in his boxers) though he didn't bother to tie it. He padded out and into the room beside his, Yoh's old bedroom. A huddled up figure struggled to hold in tears as it knelt over the empty bed.

"Anna." he stated simply.

"...I thought it would all be a dream, that if I just woke up, he'd be back, real and alive. I thought he'd be in his bed, sleeping with Boblove playing in his stupid headphones he forgot to take off... but he's not... he's really gone, isn't he...?" she whispered without looking up, tears threatening to fall. He made his way to her and knelt beside her, not looking at her, just doing as she did, staring at the bed.

"...Yes, he is. I felt the same way, at first. Like if I simply didn't believe it, it wouldn't be true. I've been surrounded by death and loss all my years, and I managed to get used to it, until he snapped me out of it. It was... a rude awakening when... when it happened..." he said, choking on the lump in his throat. She nodded silently.

"When I close my eyes, I see his face, smiling his lazy smile, then I see Hao laughing, cold, cruel laughter, and suddenly, Yoh looks like he did as he died, his skin pale, his eyes dull, his mouth open slightly, blood dribbling out, yet still smiling like the happiest man in the world." she told him. He placed an arm around her shoulder and pulled her closer.

"He had a reason to smile like that. He loved you, and you returned the feeling. When he saw you look at him with that special, silent adoration, when you ventured to pull out a smile for him, those are the moments that fueled his perpetual grin. Any man who is lucky enough to have that would be happy for the rest of his life, and afterlife, and all the time in between." he whispered, the words straight from his heart, and he was surprised he'd managed to keep it in the context it was meant to be in, rather than pointing out how every time she smiled for Yoh, it cut holes in his heart.

"Thanks, Ren. I never thought you could make such wonderful speeches. I'm kind of tired, now." she yawned. He stood and helped her up, then walked her back to her room. As he turned to go, however, she grabbed his hand.

"Please, don't go. I-I don't want to be alone, to wake up alone again." she said, pleading with her eyes. He smiled slightly and followed her into the room, seating himself in an armchair.

"Thank you, Ren. Goodnight." she said softly and fell asleep again.

That night, the Chinese teen stayed up thinking. 'Even after he's dead, I don't stand a chance with her. She'll get over him, I'm sure, but why would she ever love me... She doesn't have any romantic feelings for me. She didn't even notice the hidden meaning in my words. Yet, I can't stop loving her. I guess I'll just have to do my best to make her happy... It's what Yoh would have wanted.'

The next morning, the group all found themselves in the kitchen, a large breakfast of pancakes and syrup spread out before them. Everyone was silent until Amidamaru said, "I believe I am no longer needed here." All eyes turned to him and they realized no one had set a spot for him with his memorial tablet; it had always been Yoh's job to take care of his spirit.

"I'm sorry, I forgot!" Manta set up the tablet and helped Amidamaru to a little bit of everything.

"That is not necessary. Yoh was the only thing keeping me in this world, and I am sure that it has been much too long since I have seen my good friend Mosuke. I would be a burden here." he said quickly.

"Don't leave... not yet." they all turned to look at Anna, shocked at the lack of her commanding attitude. Was she... begging?

"...Why?" the samurai asked after a second, taking his chances with her beads.

"I... I'm just not ready... for everything to change... it's all changing so fast... Yoh was the one who held us all together... Don't you see? Now that he's gone, why would Horo and Pilica stay here? They'd go back to the north. Ren and Jun would go back to China, Faust and Eliza to Germany, Lyserg to England, Tamao to Izumo, and Amidamaru to the afterlife... Nothing will ever be the same again... Just, just spend one week... just stay for his goddamn funeral... I don't want to go alone... I don't want it to change..." she said before running up to her room.

They all stood, stunned by Anna's behavior, and the truth of her words. They all had different goals, and Yoh had been the one who tied them all together. Ren looked in each of their faces and saw in each one the reality of what Anna had said. Each pair of eyes held different hopes and dreams for the future, each was going to leave...

'Except me.' he thought determinedly. 'I will always be there for her.' with that thought in his head, he stalked off after her.