BAMBI LIVES! MWUAHAHAHAHA! XP Only now it's good Bambi... This is actually the first time you meet her, actually. The REAL her, anyway. Well, you don't really meet her until next chapter...

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The Princess and the Mage

Zelda readied herself, and blocked when Vaati came at her. She tried to push him back, but his size was his advantage, and he pushed HER back.

Swords clashed over and over again as they stabbed, slashed, and blocked eachother. One thing that Zelda found peculiar was that he kept forcing her to move backward.

There was something that Zelda was not thinking of that Vaati was. You see, as previously stated, the arena was nearly identical to the one that Link and Zelda had battled Ganondorf in. In other words, you could fall off the edge of the arena and into nothingness...

"We all know who'll win in the end, my fair princess... ME! I am far too awesome to be defeated! I'm dead sexy, I'm cool, I'm smart, I'm slick, I'm really awesome, and I'm fucking sexy!" panted Vaati.

"Oh, get over yourself! You shave your legs, and that is like, totally a cause for concern!" snapped Zelda.

"I SHAVE THEM 'CAUSE IT'S SEXY AND I'M SEXY!"

Vaati cut Zelda across the cheek. She screeched.

"A man should not shave his legs! It's wrong!" said the princess, wincing.

Vaati ripped part of her dress with his sword.

"You should show more respect, princess! I have commited feats that that fool Ganondorf could never have even DREAMED of doing! I gained Hyrule, and I learned how to pee with a vagina!"

Zelda growled and stabbed at him, but Vaati knocked her to the ground. Zelda rolled out of the way as Vaati attempted to stab her in the forhead.

"You are a good fighter, my lady! Far better than your insolent boyfriend! He is no hero, he is a fool and a weakling! I struck him down easily! I could do the same to you even faster, but alas, I'm hardly trying!"

Link... Zelda thought, her blood running cold.

He wasn't dead...was he?

Zelda screamed in pain as Vaati made a deep cut in her arm. She clutched it, and he continued to move her backward.

I could do with a miracle right about now... Wait...the Triforce of Wisdom! Zelda thought, an idea dawning on her. She tried to focus on wisdom, but her mind went blank as Vaati slammed her hard in the head with his fist.

"Don't be a fool, I saw that glazed look in your eye... Don't even try to use magic against me! We want this to be fair, now don't we? You should not use magic on the super awesome great Vaati!" hissed Vaati.

"You know, you really are an asshole!" Zelda snapped. "So stuck up! In all my days..." Vaati hit her in the head again.

"And you really talk too much, Princess Zelda! Keeping your fucking hole shut for once would please even the most miserable of folks!" Vaati announced, forcing her back again.

Zelda noticed that the wind mage's gaze flickered to something behind her briefly, but she did not dare turn her back on him.

Sadly, Vaati had been right. The Master Sword did not feel right in her hands. She really couldn't wield it properly... Would she have been better off with the katana, she wondered?

A searing, burning pain in her side sent her flying back to reality.

Vaati laughed coldly, heartily.

"You need to focus on the battle, princess! Your mind wanders!"

Zelda knew that in a sense, he was right, but she needed to think about other things. She had realized with fear that she was losing the battle, and she needed a plan.

The princess looked up to the cages. Aryll was cowered in the back of her prison, looking away, but Komali was watching her, tense and speechless. Their eyes met briefly. Zelda knew Komali could help her, and the Rito prince realized it too. He let out a gasp as Zelda recieved a slice to the chest.

Komali thought desperately. All he could do was distract Vaati. He didn't have anything on him that could pick locks, so he couldn't escape and help fight. Zelda had used a bobble on her clothing to free herself. Komali first decided to perform the simplest method of distraction.

"HEY! UGLY! YOU LOOK FAT IN THOSE PANTS!" he shouted at Vaati.

Vaati turned abrubtly.

"What?"

Zelda tried to stab him, but he had the reflexes of a cat. He didn't even have to look at her to block her attack.

Komali saw this, and dread filled him. Vaati was not to be taken lightly...

Vaati looked pissed, but he turned away from Komali to lean close to Zelda.

"Don't even try to get me with my back turned, bitch... If you do so again, then I'll do to you what I did to Link. After all, when I fought him, I was sort of trying, and that's why he's a bloody mess dirtying the floor. I'm playing games with you, princess, and I'm winning... You have annoyed me, but not so much as Link has. You don't want me to make that pretty little face of yours unrecognizable YET, do you? Hehehe..."

"And Komali...you must wait your turn to be maimed," he called to the prince.

Please, Komali... Don't give up! Fight like a MAN! Zelda thought, her face scrunching up with determination, anger, and frustration.

Komali thought and thought and thought... Then he remembered the book that he kept in his pants, the one with the maps of Hyrule and all that stuff (Remember? It was a long time ago). He pulled it out of his briefs, and targeted Vaati. He threw the book as hard as he could.

Zelda, Komali, and even Aryll gasped as Vaati continued to fight Zelda with one sword, while he used the other to cleanly chop the book in half.

"YOU BIG MEANIE! YOU LOOK REALLY FAT!" screamed Aryll, rushing to the front of the cage. Komali looked at her. She was actually helping, and together, he and Aryll fired insult after insult at Vaati.

Zelda heard Vaati murmur to himself, "Be strong, Vaati...you are too pretty to be affected by their pitiful words..."

Now that was really weird to Zelda, yet it did not surprise her. People talking to themselves in such a manner is always slightly unnerving.

The princess yet again witnessed Vaati glance over her shoulder. He smiled, as if reassured about something. He looked back at her, and grinning fiercely, he sneered, "Have a nice trip, princess! See you next fall!"

"What?" Zelda uttered. This question was soon answered.

Zelda screamed as she had never screamed before when Vaati sliced her hand deeply. The Master Sword flew from her grasp and landed a few yards away. Then Vaati tripped her up with his right foot, and Zelda's heart skipped a beat and she screamed even louder as she found herself falling backward without a floor to catch her. Vaati had managed to knock her out of the ring...

Zelda's body somersaulted against its will in the air, but she stretched out her arms...and caught the edge of the ring. Tears of pain and shock flowed from her eyes as she clung to the edge of the arena. She screeched and shut her eyes tightly as Vaati placed a foot heavily on her wounded hand. Komali and Aryll screamed and shouted.

"And now, I bid you farewell, Your Highness..." he said, grinding his foot on her hand. Zelda knew she couldn't hang there forever, and it HURT like HELL...

I'm doomed! she thought. Completely and utterly doomed!

Zelda was just about to let go of the edge and fall to her death when surprise stopped her. She watched as Vaati screamed and was pulled back by someone she could not see from her position. Slowly, Zelda eased herself back onto the arena.

A flash of blonde hair and red dress was all she saw before Vaati was wrestled to the ground. A bundle of Light Arrows was pressed against his neck in threat by his attacker. Vaati was panting and glaring up at his predator angrily, though not daring to move for fear that the Light Arrows would go into his neck.

"YOU..." he spat.

Bambi, covered in the black blood she had lain in, glared back at Vaati from her position on top of him, her silver eyes full of fury. She held the Light Arrows tightly.

Then she let off a small smile, and looked at Zelda. She winked reassuringly, and turning back to Vaati, she began to speak...