Disclaimer: I do not own X. Clamp does. Sue me not.
Warning: Language and suicidal themes.
Many thanks to my beta, Cait-Hime-Sama-dono
HiddenFace
One fine summer morning Keiichi failed to show up to class.
Looking around the classroom as he entered, Kamui noted this and frowned. Keiichi always arrived before him because, as class representative, he had many pre-class activities to attend. By the time Kamui was there Keiichi was already done with those and at the classroom to greet him.
In fact, Kamui didn't really have to scan the classroom to note that Keiichi was missing; lately the taller teen had a habit of hiding behind the class door in ambush and leap before Kamui as soon as the boy entered the classroom with a cheerful, "GOOD MORNING!" greeting.
Kamui knew there was something wrong with his school day because it didn't start with a near fatal heart attack.
"Has anyone seen Segawa-kun?" Seto, the class next door's representative poked his head into room, immediately turning to Kamui.
Kamui shook his head and shrugged a little.
"Well that's odd, he's really late."
"There's still ten minutes before class starts…" Kamui hated the type of overly punctual people who feel that only if they arrive half an hour before they're supposed to they arrive on time.
Seto straightened his glasses on the bridge of his nose and gave Kamui a patronizing withering look. "We set a meeting an hour ago." Though he saved his old livewire behavior from the Seals, annoying schoolmates were not so spared and Kamui gained a name for himself as a bit of a bitch.
"And you don't know where he is?"
"I thought he was your friend…" Seto's tone meant that Keiichi was Kamui's only friend.
For a moment Kamui stopped worrying about Keiichi and imagined how Seto's face would look with his glasses half smashed into his annoying thick skull.
"Oh, I see…Yes, Keiichi is my friend, you're right. I better look for him then." Kamui began leaving the classroom.
He passed by Seto and smirked, "Look Seto-kun, I am looking for my friend. One day, when you have friends of your own, I'm sure you'll do the same." (eheh)
Seto was two heads taller than Kamui and a member of the rugby club which meant that he was physically three times bigger than the boy. His hot headed temper was what mostly alienated him from other human beings.
While Seto blinked away the shock of that snappy remark Kamui realized that Keiichi might have overslept and needs a friend's hurried help with waking him up before class starts. After all, he can leap across campus and get to Keiichi's dorms and if Keiichi hurries up they'll only be late by a couple of minutes.
Then a thought occured to Kamui; maybe Keiichi was visiting his parent's graves and forgot to inform it to the other class representatives. Or that he forgot to inform Seto in particular (Seto punched Keiichi in junior high, Kamui heard, and ever since then their relationship's been mostly icy).
As these thoughts crossed Kamui's mind Seto spun around to watch the youth walk away from him and the red curtain of pure rage covered his vision.
Kamui was about to streak down the stairs to the ground floor and leap away to Keiichi when Seto's fist grabbed his shirt collar from behind.
A powerful force drew Kamui upwards and swung him around to face a very angry, very big, very strong young man.
Seto's eyes were ablaze as they glared at Kamui hard enough to burn holes into his violet orbs. Seto's face was red, its skin stretching under the pressure of pulsing inflating veins.
Kamui cast nonchalant mauve blizzards at his fellow pupil and carefully laid his tiny palm on Seto's relatively huge muscular one.
He broke three of his attacker's fingers and he couldn't care less how he'll explain it later.
While Seto drew back with a violent jerk, Kamui landed elegantly on his feet and commenced leaving towards Keiichi as he planned before an angry bull of a high school student interfered with him.
Keiichi's dorms were not the same as Kamui's.
Kamui's dorms were cleaner, more pampered, far more orderly and completely empty of other students.
In fact, Kamui's dorms were a villa where only he and the Seals lived. The walls were freshly painted white, the little bushes trimmed around the paths leading to and from the house and the garden surrounding the villa was always well attended to. The furnishing within his dorms was new, as were the electric appliances.
Keiichi's dorms were a big three stories bulk of a building where every student got a room and a half suite complete with a small kitchen and a mini balcony or rooms for up to four tenants with a similar small kitchen.
Each corridor had a large common shower and bathroom at its end.
There was a large room filled with washing machines, ironing stands and dryers at the bottom floor.
The walls' paint was beginning to taint grey, cut up here in there by cracks in the concrete.
The paths to and from the building were not swept and always spotted by old chewing gum (made "gum" singular) and paint stains.
The small garden around the building was unrefined in its style, its grass either too high or completely worn out by use.
The stairways and corridors smelt of sweaty clothes, laundry powder, musk, various mixed aftershave scents and burnt gunpowder (don't ask XD Don't think I will...).
There were cork bulletin boards on each floor that were covered in silly doodles, posters of models and singers, posters announcing a gig by a range of underground and beginner bands and various school and after school activity memos.
So many rooms had their doors open, letting Kamui see inside the messy happy rooms where a forgotten schoolboy overslept, letting him see how boys who didn't have class to attend lived their mornings happily.
The halls and rooms were teeming even when they were abandoned. This place was simply livelier than his sterile, fancy mansion of a villa.
Two young men shot out of one room, nearly crashing into Kamui, screamed and hollered like beasts, and disappeared into another room down the corridor. The youth to run first was stark naked and dripping wet. His pajama-clad chaser wielded a rolled wet bath towel and cackled madly as he brandished it threateningly at his friend's exposed behinds.
They made Kamui stop walking, gawk forward a bit in shock before giggling a little and turning back to the room where they disappeared into. He didn't know which room Keiichi lived in, maybe they did.
He knocked gently on the door, fearing they'd shout at him to piss off. He was only a sophomore and they were obviously much his sempais.
Of all the young men occupying the room (there were four of them according to the name list on the door), the wet and naked one had to open the door.
Kamui looked away, but it didn't help because 'away' to him was usually downwards. As soon as his eyes were on 'it' he couldn't move them away though the gods know he wanted to.
The young man (a first year university student who couldn't afford to move to the fancy dorms closer to the university campus) ruffled Kamui's hair, hooked his arm around Kamui's waist and pulled the boy in before Kamui could protest.
Kamui found himself inside the room, on the young man's bed, in the young man's naked lap, bounced like a little kid and very much trapped by two strong arms around his waist.
Kamui kicked hard enough to break bones, but the young man sat with his legs open and the bed had no box under it to hit and damage.
"Look what I found! Isn't she a cutie!" the kidnapper cackled, bouncing Kamui on his knee a few times.
"It's a boy, you dribbling idiot…" the kidnapper's roommate informed him with weary hangover eyes.
"You think I don't know that! If I'd done that to a girl I'd get my ass kicked out of here faster than I could say photosynthesis."
"Put me down, motherfucker! You're naked in case you didn't notice, you pervert!"
"O ho ho! He's got some mouth for such a cute little thing." The kidnapped embraced Kamui closer.
Kamui reached backwards and found hairs to pull. He yanked enough to hurt. "If you don't let me go right now I'll pull harder, I'll pull your scalp off, bitch!"
"Wow, hey now…uh…what's your name?" the roommate reached out to calm the teen.
Kamui's eyes blazed at the roommate, "My name is 'tell your fucking roommate to let me go before I tear his face off'" he snarled and gave another yank until the man behind him whimpered.
The naked man let Kamui go. When he opened his palm, Kamui found quite a bunch of hairs in it.
"Goodness! You didn't have to take it so seriously, I was just joking." The young man whimpered, rubbing his aching scalp. "And I'm already going bald without you having to come here and pull the rest out."
"You aught to learn not to kidnap people and grind against them when you're fucking naked, pervert!" Kamui hissed, bristling.
"What! I didn't grind against you; I popped you on my knee, that's all! I have a girlfriend, man, quit screaming or someone will hear."
The roommate noted Kamui was about to make a snarling comeback and so he stepped in to disarm the angry sophomore, "You knocked on our door, kid?"
"Don't call me a kid!"
"Okay, Tell Your Fucking Roommate to Let Me Go Before I Tear His Face Off, you knocked on our door?"
Kamui huffed and straightened his uniform jerkily, "I wanted to ask you which floor does Segawa Keiichi live on."
"Ah, Segawa-kun? You're his girl?" the naked man gave a long whistle and ducked the punch Kamui threw at him.
"Segawa-kun live five doors down from this room, Mr. TYFRtLM…oh, fuck it, what's your real name, anyway?"
"None of your business!" Kamui left the room with another huff, slamming the door behind him so hard it caused a crack in the wall by the lock.
"Touchy kid…"
"Cute, but touchy. I can see why Segawa sleeps with him, he's a livewire."
"You have a strange taste in bed, man."
Keiichi's room was dark; the curtains were drawn on the window and only a dim light screened through the flowery green drapes.
Kamui tiptoed inside, closing the door gently behind him after taking one last nervous glace at the corridor to make sure no more naked men were lurking near him.
The room was a complete mess. The walls were covered by half peeling posters too obscure to be recognized in the dark. Piles of clothes, books and notebooks covered the floor as if Keiichi's closets and schoolbag exploded.
The tatami floor was worn out in spots and dirty, though the extent of it remained hidden in the dimness of the room. The air was thick with the day's heat, dust and humidity. There were stuffed toys leaning against the wall, though they were sitting sideways as if they'd collapsed and fainted; a rabbit, a frog and a Clamp Campus blowfish.
Kamui took a step and accidentally crushed a dinner plate under his foot. He took another stride and stepped on a baseball bat which nearly sent him flying to the ground if he hadn't immediately balanced himself a bit above the floor with his powers.
Before him, under the window, lit by the dim sun's light was someone on the room's single futon. He was curled under a blanket which was drawn above his head and knotted so tightly around him it revealed the sleeping youth's form.
Keiichi was lying on his side with his face towards Kamui, both arms folded before him with palms covering his face.
"Keiichi?"
No response.
Louder this time. "Keiichi?"
Still no response.
Maybe a little harsher this time, "Keiichi!"
"Hmmn…"
Kamui walked up to the mattress and kneeled by Keiichi's covered face. What a spoiled boy, snuggling up in his blanket until he doesn't want to wake up and unwrap himself even when he has to get up to go to school.
Kamui grabbed the edge of the blanket and ripped it off the prone youth, "Wake up Keii….
"Keiichi!"
If he hadn't heard him hum a moment ago Kamui would be sure he found a dead body underneath.
Keiichi's eyes were open, unblinking, and completely empty. His fingers, as they lay on the futon, were lifeless and loose, as was every limb on Kamui's friend's body. His breathing was so flat and rare that he seemed to not be breathing at all.
"Keiichi…." Kamui heard himself exhale in merciful panic, "Wha-what happened? Are you alright? Keiichi?"
No response, not even a blink, perhaps he is dead after all?
Refusing to believe it, Kamui grabbed his friend's shoulder and gave it a good violent shake.
Slowly, Keiichi turned his eyes to Kamui. "Shi-ro-k-un…"
The blond tried to smile and failed. The corner of his lip twitched a little, but so faintly that it was hardly picked up.
"Keiichi, Keiichi, what happened? Did you eat something bad? Are you feeling ill? Do you have a fever, perhaps?" Instinctively, Kamui laid his palm on the bigger boy's forehead. He couldn't tell a fever, he never had to, goddamn it.
His palm was sweaty and shaking. His eyes were tearing and his voice cracked and Kamui didn't want to recognize what it was that caused this, though he knew pretty damn well why.
"Keiichi?" he whimpered miserably, "Please talk to me…"
His movements were sluggish and appeared to be taking a great toll on his strength, but Keiichi managed to pull (fixed tense) himself up to lean on his arm and reach out for Kamui. His reaching palm opened, neared Kamui's cheek until it nearly touched the boy and then stopped. It fell to the floor with a thud, open palm up.
Keiichi's eyes were foggy and empty, half lidded as they stared at Kamui dreamily, the edge of his lip managed to curl upwards a little this time. "Shiro…-kun…."
"What's wrong? Tell me what you feel? Your head hurts? Maybe your stomach? Do you think you have a fever?" (I know this is repetitive but Kamui's panicking if it's not getting the message through tell me please (it's fine) )
Keiichi began lowering himself back onto the futon, pulling the blanket back onto himself.
"I'm sleepy, that's all, so sleepy….do you want to come in with me, Shiro-kun? I'd like that."
Thinking about how much pain Keiichi must be going through since his parents died on him and the way he always managed to brighten the youth's day with his presence, Kamui glanced at his watch. Fuck French literature class, this is more important.
He toed his shoes off and slid in beside Keiichi, pulling the blanket better above them both.
Sleepy arms wrapped around him and pulled him closer a little stronger than a drowsy man's movements should be. Keiichi nuzzled Kamui's neck and smiled faintly.
Awkwardness frosted Kamui's mind as he tried not to think.
"Hmm….youuu smellll niiiice Shi-ro-kun…"
Why is Keiichi talking funny? He sounds like he's high or something.
Oh my god, was he high?
Kamui stifled a giggle. To think that he was so worried that Keiichi was depressed because of his parents when all he did was try to get stoned.
Kamui wanted to let the giggle tickling his throat loose, but he didn't. His eyes landed on a half empty bottle of sleeping pills laid sideways on the tatami a few centimeters away from his head, at the corner of the futon.
Violently wiggling out of Keiichi's grip, Kamui leaped to the room's phone half buried under a pile of boxers and tore off the receiver. He punched the Campus' mini hospital number so hard he chipped two of the keys.
He didn't give the nurse on the other end of the line time to answer politely, he fired away, "Help me! There's a boy here who swallowed too many sleeping pills!"
Kamui was taken aback when the nurse asked him if this boy's location was in his dorms. Why would they have his dorms on the potential suicide victims' list!
He shook off the ice-cold stun and corrected the man on the other end of the line.
"Is the boy conscious?"
Kamui darted his eyes to Keiichi, who once again seemed to be staring foreword into nothingness.
"Uh…I don't know, his eyes are open but I'm not sure he's here completely…" Kamui felt like killing destiny for making him know that dead people can have their eyes open too.
The nurse's voice was very deep and very calm, "There are people coming your way as we speak. Please, calm down and do as I say. Are you listening?"
"Yes, I'm here, what should I do?"
"Try talking to him, call his name."
"Keiichi! Keiichi!"
No response.
"He's not answering me."
"Pinch him (removed "in") right in the middle of his shoulders."
Pressing the receiver hard to his shoulder with his head, Kamui crawled back to Keiichi's side. He tipped Keiichi to lie on his back and did as he was told.
Keiichi cringed a bit, but did not respond beyond that.
"He made a face, but nothing more, he won't talk to me. Keiichi!"
"That's fine as it is, help is on the way, please remain calm."
"Should I do it again? Pinch him again I mean?"
"Not yet. Open his mouth and check if there's anything there?"
"What, like the pills?"
"The pills, mucus, vomit, anything."
"Ew…"
"…."
Kamui did as he was told. Keiichi's lower lip felt soft and thick under his thumb. If he kisses him will Keiichi wake up?
He snapped himself out of those ridiculous thoughts.
"There's nothing there, what now?"
"Place one palm on his forehead and the other under his chin and gently tilt his head backwards until his mouth opens a bit."
The door was opened violently and two men stormed into Keiichi's room. Kamui dropped the receiver as he turned around to push them out. Then he noticed their nurse uniforms and stopped himself from kicking a hole through each of their chests.
He picked the receiver, "Help is here, thank you very much, sir."
"Wait! Give me Tetsua-san."
Kamui scanned the two men who leaned over Keiichi. One opened his pajama shirt while the other kept his head tilted backwards as he placed his ear by Keiichi's mouth.
"Uh…which one of you is Tetsua-san?"
Luckily, the stripping medic was Tetsua-san. Calmly, he took the receiver from Kamui's shaky hands. His palm was large and soft as it accidentally brushed Kamui's on its way for the receiver.
"Yes Miako-san? Yes, it's a suicide attempt. We're bringing him in. What?" Tetsua's eyes darted around the room.
He covered the receiver with his palm and turned to Kamui, "Do you know where Segawa-kun keeps his pills?" his eyes were very deep, very blue and very calm.
Kamui gawked at him for a moment as mindlessly he pointed at the spilled bottle of sleeping pills.
Tetsua smiled kindly as if Kamui was a beloved cousin, "Not those, the other pills."
"W-what other pills?" he was crying again and he really preferred to be out in town and blowing something up in a particularly violent way than be (made "be") here.
"He's not breathing!" the ginger haired medic cowering over Keiichi called suddenly, shredding the sudden calm Tetsua's eyes rested on Kamui.
"WHAT!"
"Get him out of here, Tetsua! Get-him-out-of-here."
As if his comrade's intense tone went completely unnoticed, Tetsua placed his gentle palms on Kamui's shoulders and pulled them both on their feet.
"Come, why won't you go and tell your teacher that Segawa-kun's feeling a little under the weather today? I'm sure she's already writing in bad notes in his student file for being so late for class."
Kamui slapped the medic's hands off so hard it left small palm sized red marks on the large palms. "Don't try to shake me off! I know he's dying!"
Tetsua's eyes hardened. He grabbed Kamui a little harder this time and began pushing him a bit powerfully backwards out of the room.
But Kamui's not one to leave a friend under any treatment that isn't his without keeping an eye on him. He grabbed Tetsua's arms and prepared to break his bones when he heard Keiichi moan.
His eyes darted to the lying boy. The ginger medic removed his lips from Keiichi's and was now climbing to his feet, storming out of the room to get the stretcher which waited outside in the corridor.
If he moaned then Keiichi was breathing again.
Kamui's eye darted back to Tetsua's cobalt orbs. His vision was blurring with tears, "What other pills?"
Tetsua studied Kamui's face while he pushed them both sideways to let the stretcher into the room. He was keeping a firm grip on Kamui without slackening his hold one bit.
"You don't know anything about him?"
It was the wrong way to phrase the question in the medic's mind.
Kamui's vision blurred completely. His shirt collar dampened. "I….no….I don't know anything about him." He couldn't talk properly with his lower lip trembling. His heart was in so much pain that it reached every limb like the cruel grip of relentless claws.
The ginger medic managed to get Keiichi on the stretcher by then and was rummaging the drawers of a small cabinet by Keiichi's abandoned futon.
"Bingo!" he pulled out a white bottle Kamui had never seen before.
Tetsua, who turned his head to see what his comrade was on about, turned back to Kamui now. He let his grip loosen a bit and softened his gaze. It was still very serious and very parental.
"Do you want to accompany us to the E.R? I'm sure Segawa would love it if you'd be by his side when he wakes up.
Kamui was trembling so badly by now that nodding was very hard to distinguish for Tetsua. He had to wait until the weeping boy whimpered a wretched, "Yes".
"Alright, come with us."
Kamui was still trembling and crying uncontrollably as he sat in the back of the ambulance with Keiichi on the stretcher between him and Tetsua. The ginger medic was riding the vehicle like a charging animal through Clamp Campus' cheerful roads.
"Will he wake up?" Kamui heard himself whimper between hiccupping sobs.
Tetsua smiled softly and nodded. "We'll pump his stomach and he'll be alright."
Kamui looked at the unconscious Keiichi. His cheeks were puffed strangely as the flaming orange neck brace pushed them up into his face. His lips pouted funnily.
"What were those other pills?"
Tetsua sighed and looked away awkwardly. He checked to see if the ginger medic was listening; he wasn't, he was busy punching the horn to get a food truck out of his way.
The university student volunteering medic leaned forward a bit above Keiichi. "I don't know for sure, but I took a brief peek at the bottle. It was antidepressants."
Kamui blinked, unable to comprehend the words, "Wh-what do you mean?"
Tetsua's eyes filled with sweet soft warmth that made Kamui want to snuggle up to him and pretend this hellish morning wasn't happening. "Segawa-kun never told you he was taking them? Never mind. It means he was suffering from depression (made "depression" singular) and was taking medications to make it better."
"I know he was depressed….I mean, I know he must be, but he never told me he needed to take them. He was never depressed, I never saw him depressed that is….
"If he was on drugs, why did he try to kill himself?"
Tetsua leaned backwards and gave the ginger medic another testing glance. "My guess, and I'm talking from experience in these things, not personal but…anyway, what often happens, I mean what I've seen so far….
"Well it's like this; people who just began taking medication and are not yet used to the routine you need to force on yourself to do it right forget to take their medication. Mostly it's right in the morning when they're too busy getting ready for school on time or when they go to sleep and are so tired they forget.
"So they don't take the drug and, bam! The depression lands on them until they can only see black and then they do something…they try to kill themselves."
Kamui gaped at Tetsua.
By the time Keiichi was in the recovery room, his palm clutched powerfully in Kamui's, the idea fully sunk in. Until then Kamui was still fighting to get over the shock and properly analyze what happened.
"It's a good thing you caught him in the middle of it." Subaru's voice echoed in the room suddenly.
Kamui spun around on the chair by Keiichi's bed to gape at the onmyouji leaning on the doorframe.
Subaru stared at the sleeping youth on the bed with a single frozen eye. The bandages on the other eye looked fresh.
"I didn't catch him when he was swallowing them, only when he was already under the influence."
"If you found him dead then you would have caught him in the end of it." Subaru didn't show any signs of stepping into the room. He kept staring at Keiichi funny.
"Ah, I see."
"You saved his life."
Tears wallowed (welled up in?) Kamui's eyes again and rolled freely down his already drenched cheeks, uncontrolled.
(the end)