Author's Notes: I don't own it. Enjoy and review!
"Class," Snape drawled to the Gryffindor, 6th and 7th year, potions students. "Today, we're going to be making Pepper-Up Potions. The ingredients are on the board. So, sit down, shut up, and get working. And, Harry, stop talking!"
"I wasn't!" Harry shot back.
"Five Thousand Points from Gryffindor for talking back!" Snape shouted, a large smile was plastered on his face in triumph.
"We don't even have Five thousand points, Professor," Hermione replied.
"Yeah," Ron chimed in, "and just because you're a lonely, greasy, unpopular, monkey man, doesn't mean you can torture us!"
Snape's face got red with anger. His eye started twitching. His hands started shaking. His fists clenched, unclenched, clenched… His mouth opened up and he belted out some off-key notes and approached Harry menacingly. Meanwhile, Fred and George were trying not to die from laughing so hard. In fact, they were about to suffocate. With a simple spell, George made the room into a dance floor and shined the spotlight on Snape.
With a snap of Fred's finger, actually, a flick of his wand, Snape's outfit changed to a jazzy outfit like Roxie wore in Chicago. "You have some serious issues, brother," George sighed.
"What?" Fred asked, in mock innocence. "I just thought he should have an outfit that fits this song…"
"Are you trying to emotionally scar me?"
"No," Fred laughed, "just emotionally scar Snape."
"SPEDNESS!" Fred and George exclaimed simultaneously and banged their foreheads together like a couple of drunken hillbillies.
"Now be quiet," George said, fiercely. He then couldn't hold back his smile and added, "We don't want to miss the 'show'."
Severus:
The name on everybody's lips
Is gonna be Snape-y
The Dark
Lord's favorite servant
Is gonna be Snape-y
I'm gonna be
a celebrity
That means
Somebody everyone knows
They're gonna
recognize my eyes
My hair, my teeth, my wand, my nose
From
just some dumb Potion's Master
I'm gonna be Snape-y
Who says
that Dark Potions not an art?
And who in case he doesn't
die
Can say he started as a spy?
Snape-y
Snape!
Class:…
Students:
They're gonna wait
outside in line
To get to see
Severus:
Snape-y
Think
of those autographs
I'll sign,
'I hope you
die,'
Students:
Snape-y
Severus:
And I'll appear
In a long dark robe that goes
All the way down to my
feet
Students:
Here a curse,
There a curse,
Everywhere
a-curse-y-curse
Severus:
But
always out to get Potter!
(spoken)
Mmmm, I'm a star!
And
the audience loves me!
And I love them
And they love me for
loving them
And I love them for loving me
And we love each
other
And that's because none of us
Got enough love in our
childhoods
And that's Dark Arts
Kids
Students:
He's
given up his hum drum life
Severus:
I'm gonna be—sing
it
Students:
Snape-y
He made a potion and a
start
Severus:
And Harry Potter will shit
I know
To
see his name get billed below
Snape-y
Snape!
Students:
Snape-y...
Snape-y...
Snape-y...
Snape-y...
Sna-pe-y
Snape-y...
Snape-y...
George laughed, "so do you think this will ever get boring?"
"I do believe that's impossible," Fred replied.
"It's…"George began.
"SPEDtastic!" They shouted together and attempted to high five, but due to their lack of coordination, ended up missing and smacking each other in the face. This, of course, made them burst out into another fit of laughter.
