Author's Notes: Razzle Dazzle 'em. I don't own it.

Gregory Goyle and Vincent Crabbe were greedily stuffing their faces in the Slytherin Common Room, awaiting Dumbledore's arrival. Draco Malfoy walked into the room with a sneer on his face and announced, "Crabbe and Goyle, Dumbledore is here."

"Thank you. Just a moment—you ready?" Crabbe asked Goyle, concern was evident in his voice.

"Oh, Crabbe," Goyle whimpered, "I'm scared!"

"Goyle, you got nothing to worry about. It's all a circus, kid, a three-ring circus. These trials- the whole world- all show business. But, kid, you're working with a star, the biggest!"

Crabbe:
Give 'em the old razzle dazzle
Razzle Dazzle 'em
Give 'em an spell with lots of flash in it
And the reaction will be passionate
Give 'em the old hocus pocus
Bead and feather 'em
How can they see with sequins in their eyes?

Goyle:

What if your hinges all are rusting?
What if, in fact, you're just disgusting?

Blaise:

Razzle dazzle 'em
And they'll never catch wise!

Crabbe:

Give 'em the old Razzle Dazzle

Crabbe and Goyle:
Razzle dazzle 'em
Give 'em a show that's so splendiferous

Crabbe:
Row after row will crow vociferous

Crabbe and Goyle:
Give 'em the old flim flam flummox
Fool and fracture 'em

Crabbe:
How can they hear the truth above the roar?

Crabbe and Goyle:
Throw 'em a fake and a finagle
They'll never know you're just a bagel,

Blaise:
Razzle dazzle 'em
And they'll beg you for more!

Crabbe and Goyle:
Give 'em the old double whammy
Daze and dizzy 'em
Back since the days of old Tom Marvolo
Everyone loves the big bambooz-a-ler

Give 'em the old three ring circus
Stun and stagger 'em
When you're in trouble, go into your dance

Though you are stiffer than a girder
They'll let you get away with murder
Razzle dazzle 'em
And you've got a romance

Blaise: (The same time as Crabbe's)
Give 'em the old
Razzle Dazzle

Crabbe:
Give 'em the old Razzle Dazzle
Razzle dazzle 'em
Show 'em the first rate sorceror you are
Long as you keep 'em way off balance
How can they spot you've got no talent
Razzle Dazzle 'em

Crabbe, Goyle, and Blaise:
Razzle Dazzle 'em
Razzle Dazzle 'em

Draco:

And they'll make you a star!