Chapter Eleven

Scared Yet?

"Have you gone mad?"

Fred, George, and Lee were in a secret passage; it was just after Transfiguration, and George had confronted Fred about what Hermione had told him. "NO I'm not shagging Hermione, I've never shagged Hermione, are you insane?" Fred roared. "Honestly, you think I wouldn't tell you something like that? Come on, if I was shagging her I'd be dying to tell someone, and it's not like I can't trust you and Lee! Have you gone mad?"

"You said that already," Lee pointed out. His face was twitching as he fought off a smile.

"She had a lot of good points," George said apologetically.

"She's the enemy!" Fred exploded. "She's a devious little prat!"

"I know, I'm sorry, I just got to thinking—"

"How could you believe her over me?" Fred demanded.

"She was really convincing!" George whined.

"Of course she was convincing, she's smart! She's an evil, tricky, heinous—"

"I'm sorry!" George exclaimed. "I just… she got me, it won't happen again…"

"Yeah, right," Lee said. "Admit it, you've both been hoodwinked by her, and we've yet to really get her."

"What, you think you could do better?" Fred said angrily.

"I doubt it," Lee said, looking exasperated, "I'm just saying she's far too manipulative for us, at least she has been so far. She's getting under our skin, driving us up the wall, and laughing at us behind our backs—"

"This from the guy who keeps telling us to call the whole thing off," George muttered.

"We just have to work harder," Lee said firmly, ignoring George's comment. "Before Hermione tears us apart and has us all lying at her feet."

"I'm going to get her for this," Fred snarled. "She almost turned my own twin brother against me! Ooh, just you wait, I'll make her pay! This means war!"

"This is already war," George pointed out.

"Then… then this means… this means... a really big war!"

Lee stared at him. "Um, Fred? When you say things like that, I can kind of understand how she's doing it. Calm down, okay? We'll get her."

"Too right we will," George said, his face darkening. "We owe her something fierce now. And I think I've got another idea."

Fred, George, and Lee didn't show up for dinner, so Hermione took advantage of their absence to whisper the story of what she'd done to George in the secret passage. "He looked really shell-shocked," Hermione said proudly to Harry, Ron and Ginny. They all laughed. "So I reckon we can wait awhile before going through with the next phase of our plan, you know, let it all sink in before Harry asks me out." She paused. "God, that's really weird to say."

They went back to the common room in high spirits, settling in to do their homework. "I'll be right back," Hermione said, "I need to feed Crookshanks…"

She hurried up to their dormitory and set about pouring cat food into Crookshanks's bowl on the floor by her bed, but before she could stand back up the door opened and closed behind her. She turned to see if it was Parvati or Lavender and instead found Fred with a very grim and angry look on his face. She nearly dropped the bag of cat food; she set it down hastily.

"Oh… hi," Hermione said awkwardly, very nervous all of a sudden.

"Been shagging since last summer, have we?" Fred said dangerously.

Hermione couldn't keep the smile off her face. "I couldn't help it, Fred, it was just too easy," she said smugly.

Fred advanced on her; Hermione backed up as he came, eventually finding herself against a wall. Fred stopped very, very close to her, glaring. Hermione fought to keep her expression mocking, which wasn't easy; part of her was dreading he would kiss her again, and part of her was hoping for it…

"You think it's funny, do you, turning my own twin against me?" Fred snarled. He placed his palms against the wall on either side of her head, boxing her in.

Hermione swallowed, but smiled and said, "Yes, yes I do."

"I don't," he snapped. "George had quite a few questions for me… like why a little goody-two-shoes like you would kiss like you do as part of a joke."

"All's fair in love, war, and Quidditch," Hermione said coolly.

"Is it?" Fred said, stepping even closer. "You want war, Hermione? I'll give you war."

"Ooh, I'm really scared—" Hermione started to say, but was cut off as Fred leaned in and kissed her once again.

Her eyes closed and she responded immediately; she had missed kissing him, she couldn't deny it. He was beyond good at it; her mind floated away happily, all thoughts of war and jokes and rumors disappearing. Her arms went around his neck of her own accord, and he grabbed her waist, pulling her tightly against him. Her heart started pounding madly at the feel of his body; only a few thin layers of cloth separated them, and Hermione found herself wishing there was nothing between them at all.

Fred backed up a little, then turned her to the side and stepped forward; she began to walk backwards without knowing where she was going, not caring in the slightest. Her knees hit something and buckled; she landed on her back on her bed, Fred on top of her. They continued to kiss, and Hermione considered finding the zipper on his robes and tugging it down—

—until the door swung open and hit the wall behind it with a bang.

Both Fred and Hermione looked up so fast they nearly got whiplash. Lavender and Parvati were standing in the doorway, their jaws nearly scraping the floor. Lavender recovered first. "Oh. My. God!" she shrieked, grabbing Parvati's arm and turning to leave. "Come on!"

Fred looked down at the mortified expression on Hermione's face and laughed. "Scared yet?" he teased.

Hermione was so horrified that it took her a second to realize what he was talking about. "You planned that?" she hissed.

"Sure did," he said, beaming. "Told George to give me a few seconds and then let slip that I was up here with you." He leaned down and kissed her neck. "What's say we keep at it for a little while longer, hmm? I'm sure someone else will be up shortly."

"Not bad," Hermione said grudgingly as Fred licked and kissed her neck. "Of course, it isn't as good as convincing George we'd been shagging behind his back, you know."

"There's plenty more where that came from," Fred whispered in her ear.

Hermione's eyes narrowed and she smiled mischievously. "Kiss me," she said.

"What?" Fred pulled back to look into her eyes.

"Kiss me," she repeated. "Please, while we're alone, I…" She trailed off, looking up at him pleadingly. Innocently, she shifted beneath him, making Fred tense slightly. Fred looked down at her lips, longing in his eyes, and he nodded slightly, then leaned down to kiss her again.

Ten seconds later, he jerked back up with a yelp of pain. Hermione had just driven her knee into his groin, hard. She shoved him off of her, and he curled up into a ball on her bed, his face screwed up with pain.

Hermione grinned at him as he glared up at her balefully. She bent over him, pecked an exaggerated kiss on his cheek, and said, "No, Fred, I'm not scared yet at all."

With that, she flounced out of the dormitory.

"That's it," Fred choked out. "She's dead."

Harry, Ron, and Ginny were waiting for her in the common room with rather resigned expressions on their faces. She beamed when they saw them; all three of them raised their eyebrows in unison.

"You were caught having sex with Fred, did you know?" Ginny said as Hermione sat back down.

"Yeah, I knew." Seeing the looks on her three friends' faces, she added, "Oh, come off it, we were not having sex—"

"What were you doing?" Ron interrupted, giving her a stern look.

"Kissing," Hermione said, her cheeks tinged pink. "Just kissing… on the, um, bed. While laying down."

Ginny shuddered. "Pity it's my brother, or I'd ask for details."

"There are no details," Hermione said firmly.

Harry gave her a rather pointed look. "Well, you were smiling like you'd just had the time of your life when you walked down the stairs—and you've got an enormous hickey on your neck."

Hermione's eyes widened and she let out a little squeak of horror; she pulled out her wand and quickly tapped the side of her neck with it so that the mark vanished.

"Where'd you learn that spell, Hermione?" George called loudly from across the room.

Hermione whipped round to glare at him. "I learned it from Fred—or perhaps it was you. So hard to tell you apart."

"Good to know I haven't kept you and Fred apart for long," George said, smirking.

"I expect we'll be apart for a good long while," Hermione shot back. "The poor dear's gone and gotten himself injured in a most bothersome way."

George's eyes widened with nervousness before narrowing at her. "Wore him out, did you? Only reason you care about him, is it?"

"If I wanted an impotent Weasley twin, I'd have gone out with you," Hermione shot back, her temper rising uncontrollably.

"Time to make an exit," Harry hissed, looking around at the common room full of Gryffindors watching with interest.

"I can't, he's in my dormitory," Hermione whispered as several people jeered or laughed.

George gave her a cold smile. "That's not what you said last night," he said smugly.

"This is getting gross," Ron muttered, making a face.

"No, what I said last night was—" Hermione began hotly, then stopped, grinning. "Why, hello, Fred."

Fred had just appeared at the bottom of the girls' staircase. He glared at her, marched stiffly over to George and Lee, and dragged them off towards the boys' dormitories. Hermione could have sworn she heard him say the word "regroup."