Why You Don't Let OCs Have A Camera
Chapter 1: Myrmidon Ahoy
A/N: Hi. n.n Long time no see. Well, here I am, with a humor-fic. All these characters are mine, so... If you don't recognize them, that's why. ... Erm... Disclaimer anyone?
Rose: U-um. S-she doesn;t own f-fire e-mblem, but the c-c-characters are, um, hers. hurries off
"Is my bandanna straight?" a nomadic trooper said to a nearby mercenary, while tying his bandanna on over his messy brown hair.
"I don't see why it needs to be, you aren't," replied the one clothed in dark red, currently lounging on a blanket, his sword nearby.
"Damien!"
"Yo! Guys, camera rolling here!" A myrmidon with dark-purple hair was holding a small video camera in his right hand, pointed at the nomadic trooper, who jumped a little bit, then turned to the camera, smiling his best fake smile.
"Oh, hello," he laughed lightly, "and welcome. I'm Talirei. This is going to be the run-down of the numerous people in our camp, and I guarantee, this won't be the last time that you see us!" The nomadic trooper said in a rather cheesy announcer voice, motioning over the large area behind him, where numerous people were.
"First, you'll meet our resident mercenary!"
"What the hell? Get that camera off me!" the mercenary said, as the lens soon found itself in his eye, thanks to the myrmidon's poor camera skills. Then there's a lovely shot of the blue sky while the myrmidon gets pushed backwards, landing with a thump. Then the nomadic trooper peers over, with the fake smile still in tact.
"... Well, it seems Damien's not in the mood to be filmed right now. So... Maybe we'll get him when he's asleep."
"You better not," the mercenary could be heard saying from off-screen, and the sound of a sword being picked up, followed by footsteps.
"Geish, is he not getting any sex from his little bitch-monk, or what?"
"Klaei! Be nice."
A shot of the ground and the myrmidon grumbling as he stands up, then a shot of Talirei once again, trying not to look like he's about to hurt someone, but instead looking like he's on a coffee-high. "Well, next up on our list of escaped mental ward patients is that snoozing sage over there."
The camera turned and focused on a purple-haired male, who looked very much like a female, leaning against a tree, sleeping quietly, his lavender cape being used as a blanket/pillow. Our lovely host giggled slightly, looking to the sage, then to the camera. "We caught him in his weekly sleeping moment. This is Lavender, the one-fourth Sacaen sage. Isn't he just adorable when he's sleeping like that?"
The camera turned and zoomed on the sleeping sage, then turned back to the host, now looking less coffee-high and smiling a bit more realistically, tucking a few stray strands of hair under his blue bandanna.
"Next is probably the one we'll have the hardest time getting on film, shy little thing. Her name's Rose and she's a cleric, and she's scared of most guys, so as you can tell, our two-man crew might have a little difficulty getting her on our documentary."
The nomadic trooper turned and looked over the camera, then he muttered, "There she is!"
The camera immediately turned and focused on the form of a cleric, zooming in as far as possible to get her on film before she noticed. In her left hand was a stave, and in her right, some holy book. Her hair was a bright, rose-red and she wore all white. She blinked before looking up and noticing the camera on hey, jumped, dropped her book, hurried to pick it up, then rushed off, all in a blurry dash of white and red. The camera then turned back to the host, but was still zoomed so we get a lovely look at his pores, before the myrmidon quickly fixed the zoom.
"Well, at least we got a glance of her, right? Now, on to-"
"Hey, Talirei, we're running out of battery here."
"Didn't you charge it?"
"I told you to!"
"You did not!" the host said, stomping his foot, his hands on his hips.
"Did to!"
"Did n-"
Cut to black.
A/N: Sorry it's short. ; It's just kind of a teaser for the main thing. Review! ... Please?