"So you gonna come out for a drink with us or what?" Hermione asked as they all walked into the locker room.
"Sure why not?" Flash smiled. The girls murmured excitedly.
"Oh great … Freddy Mercury's coming with us," Ron whispered to Seamus. Seamus grinned.
"So where we going then?" Flash asked the group at large.
"Oh, Tony's" Draco said, throwing a couple books into his locker and pulling on his jacket, "yeh, they give us free drinks there"
"Cool, why?"
"Because Ginny's always flirting with the manager" Parvarti and Lavender giggled together.
"She what!" Ron shouted.
"Jeez, take a chill pill man" Lavender said, startled at Ron's angry reaction.
"But she's my sister … that's like gross" Ron protested weakly. And he began to mutter threats to his sister under his breathe. The girls rolled their eyes.
However when they arrived, Tony's was not exactly what Flash had been expecting.
"A diner!" he said in disbelief.
"Yeh, cool huh?" Draco smiled, walking into the shiny tiled ice-cream parlour, "you didn't think we were actually going to a pub or something did you?"
"Oh no, of course not" Flash said sarcastically, sitting himself down opposite Draco at the nearest table, "the phrase "going out for a drink" just kinda threw me off" he motioned wildly with his arms. Draco laughed.
"You can't have alcohol at like 4 o clock in the afternoon" Parvarti and Lavender said together, wagging a disapproving finger in Flash's direction.
"Sure you can! I certainly would" Pansy interjected.
"That's my girlfriend" Ron said approvingly, pulling Pansy towards him and kissing her neck. The others looked away in disgust and silently decided to change the subject.
"So what time is Ginny gonna be here then?" Hermione asked, desperately trying to ignore the loud slurping noises coming from the couple beside her.
"Actually she was meant to be here with Colin about three minutes ago" Parvarti said, consulting her watch.
"They probably stopped over for a quickie," Seamus said. Everyone laughed. Thankfully Ron was too engrossed in his explicit activities with Pansy to notice what Seamus had joked about.
Then suddenly the doors flew wide open as a boy and girl, glued at the lips, came crashing through them. Ron and Pansy broke apart to investigate the cause of the commotion. Seeing who the couple rolling around on the floor was, they both exchanged amused looks and resumed with their intense snog.
The girl, who was sprawled on top of the boy and pinning him to the floor, briefly lifted her head to try and spot her friends. She then pulled her boyfriend onto his feet, placed his hands on her ass and moved towards the table where the group was sitting.
"Hey Luna, Hey Neville" the girls chanted.
Luna smiled, then without any further comment she fiercely shoved Neville into the nearest seat and straddled his thighs, her long blonde hair falling into his round face.
Flash raised his eyebrows.
"Oh sorry" Draco laughed, noticing Flash's expression, "Flash, this is Luna" he said, pointing to the girl, who was nibbling on her boyfriend's earlobe, "and this is Neville" he said, pointing to the boy.
The couple looked up to see who Draco was addressing and both were shocked to see Flash, sitting in his tight leather clothes and silver jewellery. Who the hell is this punk? They both thought.
"Luna, Neville, this is Flash, he's new at the school" Draco informed them.
"Hi … um … nice pants" Neville said, randomly casting around for something to say.
"I think they're sexy," Luna agreed.
"You think everything's sexy," said Hermione, smiling.
"Oh and you don't?" Luna argued, "You're a porn star for Christ sake".
Hermione blushed.
"You're a what!" Flash laughed.
"It's true" Luna said seriously, "She's been doing it since she was fifteen"
Flash raised his eyebrows. No way,he thought. But apparently she wasn't joking.
"That's wild!" he said, looking at Hermione in a whole new light.
At this point Ron and Pansy decided to abandon their spicy snog and joined in with the discussion on Hermione's bizarre career choice.
"She's made six movies so far" Pansy told Flash.
My favourite just has to be "Mystic Ray and the Phallic Fantasy"" Luna said conversationally, "that one was hot!"
Everyone nodded.
But just at that moment a blinding flash of light interrupted their talk, as two more individuals joined the table.
"And just where have you been exactly?" Pansy said to the new arrivals in mock irritation, placing her hands on her hips.
The people she was talking to, was a pretty girl who had shoulder length red hair (Flash guessed this was Ron's sister Ginny as they both shared the same hair colour) and a short-ish boy, who had a mousy coloured mop and was clutching a disposable camera in his hands. This was obviously what caused the flash, he thought.
"No-where" Ginny blushed, looking slightly ruffled as she squashed into the seat next to Seamus. The boy seated himself opposite her.
"Well seeing as everyone's finally here" Pansy said, casting Ginny a knowing look, "I guess we should order"
"Hear hear!" Ron exclaimed.
"Usual everyone?" Draco asked. They all nodded. "Flash, what about you?" he said, turning to Flash, but before he could answer Ginny interrupted.
"Flash? Who's Flash?" she said, confused.
"That would be me," Flash told her. She and the mousy-haired boy stared at Flash, taking in his rather odd appearance with raised eyebrows.
"He's new at the school" Hermione told them.
"Oh wow!" said the mousy-haired boy, "so it's Flash? That's such a cool nickname! Decent man! I'm Colin by the way"
"Uh … thanks … um … Colin" Flash replied, slightly taken aback by this rather enthusiastic greeting.
"Anyway" Draco pressed on, "Flash what are you having?"
"Just a strawberry milkshake thanks"
Draco disappeared for a moment, and then returned with a tray-full of overflowing milkshakes. He passed them out and sat down with his own large chocolate one.
After a couple of minutes the conversation started to get going again.
"So when's your party again Draco?" Seamus asked, Flash had noticed Seamus watching Draco very closely over the last few hours and he seemed very happy to have an excuse to talk to him. Flash found this rather strange seeing as Seamus was dating Hermione, but decided to ignore his suspicions for now. After all, they had just met.
"Tomorrow night 8 o clock, my place" Draco said as if he had learned the statement off by heart. Seamus smiled. "Flash, you coming?" Draco asked.
"What?"
"Do you wanna come to my party tomorrow night?" Draco repeated.
"It's gonna be amazing" Ron said, "house party's are the best!"
"Sure" Flash said, and he was surprised to find a warm glowing feeling at the thought of being asked to Draco's house party, which he found quite disturbing.
"What are you wearing to the party Hermione? Ginny asked, using her straw to stir the pink coloured milkshake around in her glass.
"Oh yeh!" Hermione exclaimed excitedly, "your gonna love it so much, it's this amazing deep blue velvet mini dress, and it's got these really thin straps, but it's so comfy, seriously. What about you?"
"Oh it's a really lush green velvet full length, but it's got a sexy split up the left leg though, so nice!"
The next half an hour was spent discussing what they were all wearing to the party. Draco had agreed to let Flash come around early to help with the decorations. And Ron and Seamus were deep in discussion of what alcohol they were bringing.
"And Draco, I am so gonna get you pissed out of your mind!" Ron shouted across the table, downing the last of his third milkshake. The sugar seemed to be going to his head.
"Oh, I don't know" Draco said uncertainly.
"Oh, come on Draco! You have to! There's no point in having the biggest party of like the century and not get shit-faced!" Pansy argued, also finishing off her third milkshake.
"I'll think about it" Draco said dismissively. Pansy then turned to Flash.
"You have to help us, can you believe he's never consumed an alcoholic drink in his entire life?" Pansy whispered very loudly.
"Not to mention he's never had a relationship of any kind with anyone" Hermione joined in, "not even holding someone's hand". "But I suppose that doesn't change the fact that everyone in the whole school fancies him".
Flash stared incredulously.
"Thanks for that" Draco said, but he was smiling.
On the opposite side of the table Neville and Luna had started again with their hot love make-out. The entire diner was watching them in shock. Looking around they realised the attention they were attracting and decided to move their steamy scene into the toilets.
Once within the confines of an empty cubicle, Luna reached for her bag that she had carried in with her and extracted from it a long piece of silk which she tied around Neville's mouth as a gag and also retrieved a heavy duty pair of pink furry handcuffs.
This item reminded Neville particularly of their first "time" together. It had been on a balmy summers evening. Luna's parents were out of town and they had the house all to themselves. Luna had shown Neville her bedroom, which was large and painted blood red with shocking pink furniture. The middle of the room consisted of a giant, king-sized, heart shaped, reverberating bed. Neville had been thrown down onto it, surrounded by colossal pillows and cushions covered in sequins and fur. Luna had stood at the foot of the bed, dressed in a black PVC cat suit. She was wearing very high-heeled boots, and the zip on her suit was pulled down so low that it almost completely revealed her upper half. She smiled at Neville seductively and ran her finger down from her tongue and through her cleavage. Neville was shaking with fear.
"Don't worry Neville," she had said, "it's perfectly natural to feel nervous on your first time". She cracked her whip.
But now it was two years later and Neville was no longer nervous, he had had a lot of practice.
Luna walked up to him and handcuffed his wrists to the water pipe running up from the toilet he was sitting on. His trousers were pulled low around his ankles and his shirt was ripped open.
"Oh wait" Luna said, realising something, "we need some whipped cream". She winked at Neville then quickly hurried out of the toilets to find some. Neville was just getting comfortable when the door of the toilets swung open, in walking a group of Japanese tourists, who had obviously wandered into Tony's to use the loo. Neville struggled urgently, trying to break the handcuffs, but they were too strong. He prayed the tourists wouldn't see him, but it was too late. His struggle had notified them of his presence. They all whipped out their cameras and started taking endless photographs. Two small children at the front of the group were pointing and laughing at Neville in his leopard print boxers. Neville tugged and pulled at the handcuffs, but they would not break.
After a minute or so Luna came back holding a can of spray whipped cream. When she saw the commotion in the bathroom she stopped and stared, transfixed in terror. A moment later the door swung open again and Neville was horrified to see all of his friends gaping at the horrendous site before them.
Ground please swallow me, Neville thought to himself.