AN: First, thank you for the great suggestions! I really knew where I wanted to go, I just needed to get my thoughts in order (not an easy task on most days!). This chapter leads up to a conversation between Sarah and her brother regarding her 'wanton ways' with Gawain. I hope I don't disappoint with the outcome of that! I'm also trying hard to include some of the other knights a little more. I have a tendency to forget all the characters that are in my stories and just go on and on with the heroine and hero. Hopefully, this will give it more substance. Let me know…
Now, I want to thank the reviewers for the last chapters…
Lucillaq: I actually had thought of that, but I'm kind of reluctant to let yet another female be rescued from Marius' dungeon. Instead, I think I will go another way. Hope you like it. But it will be a few chapters 'til I get to that part. Just be patient…
Furibondo: In taking your suggestions to heart, I agree, things were different back then than we portray them in our stories. For one thing, women were not allowed around the fortresses where Roman soldiers were stationed. Of course, they were close by in the villages that always popped up. But that wouldn't fit in with our love stories, so we rearrange history to suit our needs… As for marriage during their service, absolutely right. They would not be allowed to marry. But then Arthur is not the usual Roman commander, thus the round table. So, at least for my purposes, he will allow them to marry, even if it is probably not going to be well known with the Romans under Arthur's command. But, still along that line, I don't think the Roman soldiers would get too upset at what Arthur did, since I'm sure he would allow them to marry as well if they asked. I think Arthur looks at his role as commander as more of leader, than absolute ruler. As for Timothy's ideas about Sarah and Gawain. There are two things you must remember, first, I don't think Sarah would let anything stop her from doing what she feels is right and second, he has been through so much, and gotten involved in the wrong things, that he may not feel that his ideas are right anymore. Just a thought since most people begin to doubt their own feelings and ideas when they have screwed up royally once or twice. At least I do… On an entirely different note… thank you for reading and I'm glad you finally decided to review, and without flaming! Hope you continue to read (and enjoy) my story…
Now on with the story!
Gawain had watched Sarah begin to yawn, apparently growing sleepier by the minute. Finally, unable to fight the feeling any longer, she stood up and bade goodnight to the group. She headed to the tree Gawain had set up their pallets under, hoping to get a good night's sleep. She had only just reached the tree when she felt Gawain step up and prepare to lie down as well. "You didn't have to come to bed unless you wanted to." She told him. He stopped what he was doing and looked into her eyes for long moments before he said anything. "I couldn't pass up the chance to hold you in my arms. I feel an emptiness when you are not there for me to feel. Your scent brings peace to my mind." He watched as she began to give him a slight smile. "Far be it for me to deny you peace or anything for that matter, my lover. My heart." He felt his heart race at the implications her words left unsaid. Several teasing remarks came unbidden to his mind, but her words left him feeling that teasing was not what she wanted from him. "Shall I move our pallets further from the others?" He asked instead. She quickly sat up as a way of answering. He grabbed her pallet and began leading the way through the small under brush, as she walked closely by his side, carrying the blanket she had used for cover.
The two lovers stopped walking a few yards from where they had been and he spread the blanket on the ground. He quickly removed his tunic and reached for her as she dropped the blanket to reach her arms around his neck. Their kiss was slow and deliberate, a kiss meant to arouse each other, with mouths slightly opened to allow their tongues access to explore. He felt her hands gently rubbing small circles on the back of his neck before she brought them to each side of his face to cup his cheeks. He pulled her closer and moved his lips to her jaw, tracing the contour with the tip of his tongue. He heard her moan deep from her throat and slowly lowered her to the pallet. He lay beside her and felt her rub her hands across his naked chest. As she raised her head to gently kiss his skin he closed his eyes and relished the feelings her kisses were bringing to his body. It had been too long since the night they had last loved each other. He wanted her completely, but was in no hurry. This night would be a night of exploration. A night when their union would bind them forever whether anyone spoke the words of union or not. Their spirits, their souls as Arthur called whatever resided inside them, would be one forever after this night and he wanted to make it last as long as possible.
Derek knew the knight had followed her for only one purpose and his hatred took a new level. The man would pay for touching her as only he was meant to do! But, in his mind, he realized that the knight could do no more than she allowed. 'Don't worry, my sweet,' he silently vowed, 'you, too, will suffer for your wanton act against me.' He settled into the wagon, mentally plotting his revenge. Before he fell asleep he had it all planned out, all he needed was a chance to put his plan into action. He smiled as he imagined what the knight would do as he watched him take her. He even wondered if he would be able to prolong the agony, taking her at will, before giving him the peace of death. That would be her payment for betrayal. She could watch the man die slowly and with much pain. The punishment was perfect. The satisfaction he felt as he imagined how the scene would play out let him fall asleep with a smile on his lips. Yes, revenge would be his, and soon if he could arrange it. He would never let anyone betray him again without retribution.
Gawain woke from a sound sleep and saw darkness surrounding him. He lay there for a moment looking through the canopy of trees to see a few stars shining brightly, but the leaves kept most of the light from reaching the ground underneath them. He lay still and listened to the sounds around him, a cough here, a rustling there, the mumbling of people talking low in the distance, nothing that sounded in the least threatening. Satisfied that all was well, he turned to put his arm around Sarah and felt… nothing. He reached further and still could not feel her body lying next to his. With a start, he sat up and tried to see through the darkness, in hopes that she would be coming back from relieving herself. There was no sounds or signs that anyone was nearby, so he quickly stood up and began pulling his trousers and tunic on, grabbing his boots as an afterthought. He had only taken a couple of steps, each time his foot falling on a sharp object hidden from him in the darkness, when he decided to take a moment to pull the boots over his feet. Finally, after much cursing under his breath, he headed toward the campsite to alert everyone to her disappearance.
He came crashing through the underbrush, axe in hand, and ready to rally the men to search for his love, when he noticed that she was sitting around a small fire, talking softly with Lancelot. She had her back turned in his direction, but turned her head to see what Lancelot was staring at. "Gawain, Love, are you alright?" without waiting for his answer, she continued in a merry tone, "Come sit by the fire. It's such a beautiful night and Lancelot has been telling me tales of some of your escapades over the years." With a sigh, he lowered his axe, and saw that Lancelot's eyes had followed the weapon. "Gawain, are we under attack or should I be worried that you caught me talking to Sarah without you being present?" Sarah looked from one man to the other, trying to decide whether or not Lancelot was serious, when Gawain stepped up and flopped down on the log next to her.
"No, it's nothing like that." He started, then turning to Sarah, he continued, "But it would have been nice to know where you were. I awoke and found you gone. It scared me. I thought something had happened to you." She saw him look at her, relief in his eyes and prepared to tease him when he said, "I told you I would not let anything happen to you again. You can't keep slipping away if I am to keep my promise."
"Yes, well, I've been meaning to talk to you about that." She said hesitantly. "Gawain, you can't protect me every minute of every day and night. There will be times that I need to be alone…" she let her words trail off, then with more force in her voice, she continued, "and then there will be times that you will be away. So you have to relax and believe that I will take care of myself." She saw the doubt in his eyes and decided to play it his way. "Of course, the other knights will help me if they are around and Timothy as well." When she said the last, she heard him 'snort' a sound that reminded her of a horse blowing air through his nostrils.
"Now, what was that supposed to mean?" she demanded with a little more sarcasm than she had intended. He looked at her quickly, "Where was Timothy when Derek began to drag you away from your home? Huh? How did he protect you then?" She didn't know what to say to his questions. Finally, she found her voice, "Gawain, listen to what you're saying. Timothy tried to help me, but Derek was prepared and got the best of him. We know better now, and we will be prepared if he should try anything, and I'm saying that will be a big IF. He's probably at least a day's ride north of the village and we're that far south." She watched the emotions play across his face and knew she was finally getting through to him. "Now, will you just relax and enjoy this trip? That is what I plan to do. I will not let that man get under my skin anymore."
Gawain listened to the words Sarah spoke and realized how ridiculous he had been in believing he was keeping her safe. All he was doing was trying to keep up with her and control her surroundings. "I'm sorry." He said quietly. Then he looked up to find Lancelot staring into the fire, trying desperately not to become involved in the discussion. He turned to the woman sitting beside him and spoke softly, "I just know I felt like my heart was going to explode when I found out he had taken you. I don't know what I would do if something happened to you." The love he saw in her eyes as she gazed at him let him know she had not been upset, then her words brought the discussion to an end. "I know, Gawain, and I loved feeling so special. But unlike some fairytale that young girls think about, this is real. Bad things will happen no matter what we try to do to prevent them. If I learned nothing during my time away from home, I learned that much, and I've grown a good bit as well. I will not do anything that could be considered stupid, and put myself in needless peril. But I can't hide either. I can't let him have that much control over me, or us." She reached out and touched his arm as she said the word 'us'. He gave her a small smile and put his hand over hers. Before he could say anything, Lancelot spoke up, "Who would've thought it, our Gawain falling for a woman with a brain!" Whether it was meant to lighten the mood or not, it had that effect and both Sarah and Gawain joined in the chuckle.
"Alright, I get the point. Now what was so interesting as I came into the camp?" He put his arm around Sarah's shoulders to pull her closer and felt her snuggle into his side. She really was the woman he had been hoping for and Sarmatian after all. His last thought before Lancelot began filling him in on their discussion was what he could have done to deserve such luck in his life. If only that luck would hold out for a few more months, then he would be the man his father had become after his service to Rome.
The three so enjoyed their time around the fire that they seemed surprised when the others began to wake up and join them. Bors summed it up best when he said that he had just felt compelled to join them after being awakened by their laughter. Gawain looked around at his friends and felt contentment in his heart. Being forced to come to Britain hadn't turned out so bad after all. He just hoped the others could find a small measure of the happiness he now felt, for they deserved it as much as he did
The smell of food cooking somewhere in the circle of smaller camps finally brought their revelry to an end as Bors exclaimed, "My belly thinks my throat has been cut I'm so hungry!" Sarah laughed and told them she would attempt cooking if they would gather more wood and bring her some supplies. It seemed even Tristan had gotten into a good mood when he quietly commented, "I think I'll just settle for an apple, then." She picked up a small twig and threw it in his direction and watched him duck even though the twig would have missed. "Since you're the one with the smart mouth, then you can cook!" She exclaimed as she laughed with the others. That brought on a chorus of comments such as, 'Maybe we should all just eat an apple!' "So, can I gather from everyone's reactions that you can cook no better than I?" she teased the scout. She watched as he just shrugged, "I do well enough that I don't starve on my own."
Arthur walked up just as Bors enlightened everyone with, "That's because you can't ruin a raw apple." Arthur watched his men for a moment, then put an end to the teasing, "Well, I think we'll have to wait for another time to have a cooking contest. We'll just eat some bread and cheese on the road. Tell the villagers to pack up, I want to leave within the hour." The knights all stood up, giving half-hearted grumbles as they did so. Sarah walked back toward the spot she had spent the night with Gawain to gather their pallets just as Timothy walked into the group. "Sarah, wait." He called to his sister. She stopped and turned back to look at him, "I thought you might ride with me for awhile today. I've missed you while you were gone and thought we could talk as we rode." She looked quickly at Gawain and saw him nod and smile, pleased that he was letting up the vigil he had imposed upon himself. "Of course, Tim, I'd love to. Gawain, I'll catch up with you later in the day and spend the afternoon with you. Is that acceptable to you?" He nodded and they went about the business of packing up camp. Life was certainly doing a complete turnaround for her since her trip home. If only Timothy would find some happiness to replace all the heartbreak he had suffered while she was gone.