Oh hell.

By: butterfly wolf

Chapter nine: Helms Deep: Part one.

Warning: There is a…well…make out scene in this, I know most people here are use to it and looking forward to it, but I know of some immature readers around the ages of 14 who have emailed me on it. Helms Deep will have tops 4 parts, and all will have sex and battles. Well…battles in at least two.

-Butterfly Wolf

Haldir's gave met the dark figure's on the left castle tops. He bowed his head politely. Kevin. He could tell by the way the person was built it was male and knew not the weapons, and that the two followers of the fellowship, Danielle and Kevin, we're the only ones who knew how to use them. Kevin's heat pumped a million miles per hour as he watched Haldir's every move. Danielle loaded her guns and first and foremost, the Grenada launcher. Her gaze traveled over all as she waited.

Legolas glanced around for Danielle. She wasn't among the men, nor elves. His heart began pumping harder as his eyes started scanning franticly. Surely they'd let her fight…

He saw movement at the tower tops.

The right one looked female and young…thank Valar…

Hearts pounded in ears as the army coming to kill them all came into sight.

10,000 Uriki marched to destroy anything and everything.

One could nearly feel death breathing down their neck.

For hope…

Danielle and Kevin aimed their launchers, as the rain began to poor.

One step was echoed by a thousand more as they marched.

Two…

Three…

Danielle's scanned over them, looking for the gunpowder the was made to take down the bridge…

Four…

"Do you see it?"

Five…

"Nope."

Six…

"Damn it…Keep looking."

Seven…

"THERE! THERE! 3:00 ON THE LEFT!"

Danielle moved her mouth away from the walky talky and looked at 3:00.

"I don't see anything"

"Keep looking, further out."

"Where?"

"Like, in the middle at 3:00! Guarded? Duh!"

"OH!"

"Shh."

"Opps"

They halted.

Kevin quickly turned his launcher to 3:00.

Okay…

Aimed…

Now we wait…

The Uriki made them selves known to all who didn't see…

Just incase any of the men and elves has a sudden attack of blindness…

Making noises showing just what beast and stupid creatures they were.

And probably making babies down below cry.

I would.

"Shoot the arrow. Come on people! Somebody! Anybody, I'm getting a headache and this is only the beginning!"

Kevin snickered at Danielle's joke.

A mans arrow flew threw the air.

"Bless you man!"

"Shh."

"Right, sorry."

"hee hee hee."

"Quite."

"hee…"

"NONE!"

Silence…

The Uriki stood there still.

"Oh my fucking God! Walk one more fucking step! I beg you!"

One…

BOOM!

BOOM, BOOM, BOOM, BOOM, BOOM.

Mines went off like dominoes.

Danielle and Kevin did victory jumps.

"Hell yes!"

"Wahoo!"

"Bitches yeah!"

"ha ha!"

Uriki body parts flew. Knocking others down along with the debree.

They stopped dead.

Looking at the ground then each other.

All the men and elves looked around also, not knowing what just happened.

Haldir looked up to where Danielle and Kevin were still bouncing with joy.

He grinned.

The Uriki still did not move.

"Walk you Maggots!"

They started off again.

Boom!

Boom!

Bo..ewwm.

"Damn, defective."

"Ah well, still killed three."

"Hee hee hee."

"We are so sadistic."

"I know."

Aragorn gave cue to fire to the elves.

Men followed.

"And now is the moment they get too see what we can really do."

"Got your launcher aimed?"

"Hell yes."

"Ready?"

"Born ready."

"Fire!"
They launched two grenades at where they say the gunpowder and Uriki body parts and blood flew like air.

"Oh yeah baby!"

"I rule."

"This is fun!"

"Kevin, that's only 2,000 down."

"So?"

"We still have to fight the other 8,000."

"Quite you and let me celebrate."

"Mmph."

Danielle began randomly launching her grenades.

Okay, now they had 3,000 down.

It helped.

"I'm going to start firing with my gun so I don't waist them because we still have to fight two more battles before this is over."

"Okay."

"I suggest you do the same."

"No, we can make more."

"With?"

"Um…more gunpowder?"

"We used it all…"

"Shit!"

"Mm."

Danielle pulled her sniper off her back and started aiming at what looked like commanders.

Kevin aimed for and only for protecting Haldir.

Haldir looked up amazed and somewhat frightened with the first fire that got one off his back.

He smiled and nodded.

"There! Aim for the black figures in the towers!"

"Oh shit…"

Danielle missed one of the commanders and it caught site of her.

"Shit!"

"Let's get out of here!"

Danielle pulled her launcher down with her onto the ground against the wall as arrows started raining down ontop of her.

She quickly unloaded it, making sure none of the keys were removed from the grenades.

She quickly crawled to the stairs,

"Kevin! You still with me!"

"Yeah…got hit in the arm though, but my chain mail protected it."

"You sure you're okay?"

"Yeah."

"Alright."

Danielle hooked her grenades on, locking in the keys and pulled out her sword, running down the stairs to join the battle.

"Let's dance."

Turn, block, stab, side step.

Duck, swing, hit, stab, pull.

Punch, kick, slash, stab, duck.

Kevin battled his way to Haldir.

Slash, kick, push, stab.

Duck, push, stab, pull up.

Pull down, slash, block, punch, stab.

Walk, turn, kick, stab.

Walk, block, stab, pull.

Turn, duck, block, slash, punch, stab.

Kevin smiled at Haldir, trying to keep himself concentrating on the war, and not his eyes.

Haldir smiled and nodded back.

"Pull back! Pull back!"

Kevin grabbed him and battled into the keep.

"What are you doing human?"

"Not letting you die."

"if it is my time…"

"Its not!"

Kevin pulled him into a room in the keep.

"I have to go find Danielle…"

Haldir grabbed his cloak and pulled him down pretty much on top of him.

"No you don't…"

"No I don't."

Haldir chuckled and removed Kevin's mask.

Kevin blinked a million times making sure this wasn't a dream.

Haldir caressed his cheek. "So young…so pure…"

Kevin gave an attemptive swallow, but the lump in his throat didn't go down.

Haldir's hand moved to the back of his head and pulled him down until their lips met.

If this wasn't heaven, Kevin wasn't sure what was.

Danielle continued her battling.

"Danielle! Get back in here!" Surprisingly it wasn't Kevin's voice.

Legolas.

Danielle battled her way there.

She glanced around.

Oh god, she didn't see Kevin, or Haldir.

Maybe Haldir did get killed and he was at his body?

Or maybe they both did…

"Did Haldir die?"

"No, I saw him and your friend go that way."

Danielle sighed…then looked at where he pointed…a door.

Uh…

"Oh my god! Of all the times and places in the world he had too…" "Too what?" Danielle looked up at Legolas.

"Nothing! Just don't go in there." He smiled.

"And what might lye in there?"

"Nothing I hope you would want to see."

He chuckled, pulling her against him in a hug.

"We ride out!"

"Umm.."

A/N: PLEASE READ! Okay, brat readers. Stop here and I update I Just Cant Wait To Be King! Other readers, heres the plan for the sequal. If you don't like it, it can end with this.

Battle of Pride.

Danielle, Legolas, Kevin and Haldir have founded the Pride Lands. (Its not meant to be from Lion King, just happens to be. Its called Pride Lands because it's a mix of so many different people coming together.) The Pride Lands have some of whats left of elves, dwarfs, and some halflings that travel there. Kevin and Danielle have advanced it in many ways, but it is a secret land. All warriors have the strongest armor and better made guns then before. Cannons, mines, and more have been invented had another war ever come upon them…and thank goodness they prepared…

15 years to the day that Danielle and Kevin entered Middle Earth, is no longer celebrated.

Danielle and Legolas's daughter, Raven, who is 13 and Kevin and Haldir's son Daren (male elves can bare children in this ladies and worms wink)

Who is 13 and a half see smoke rising in the way that the stories tell is Mordor. In fear and alarm, they run to tell the council which guides The Pride Lands. Made up of the warrior commander, top carpenter, plumber, farmer, trainer, black smith, a spy, odd job worker, and their parents.

Alarmed, Kevin and the rest rise to look out to see smoke rising…

Mordor has rose again, and the world must undergo a time of testing once again. But this time…Man fights its self.

Gondor and Rohan send word to the Pride Lands that their men are being possessed by an evil unknown to them, and Orcs are begging to come from Mordor once more, only this time, there are no points on their ears, and a Pride Lander has rose amungst them with the knowledge of a Pride Lander.

Can Man win against what its created?

Okay, you all can say end it here, or help me with that cuz im not really sure about it.

Thanks for even reading Oh Hell!