Disclaimer: I do not own anything Harry Potter...except for the books, movies, video games, posters, errr...

Chapter 5

Hermione slapped him. Hard. Across his face, her chest heaving...eyes glaring. She was so angry with him she could spit nails.

Harry had stood up and got right in her face...he looked extremely angry. She immediately wished she hadn't of slapped him but she wanted some kind of emotion from him and she couldn't contain herself. They continued to glare at eachother for what seemed like hours.

XxX

Their faces were inches apart...Hermione was not going to back down this time. She stared intently into his eyes...which she wasn't quite sure, but...

she thought they were starting to tear up.

"Surely its the rain..." she thought. She had only seen Harry cry once...and that was when Cedric died. For some reason he made a point not to cry in front of others.

Harry could feel a lump rise up in his throat. He did not want to back down but she was right. He could not believe she had slapped him but he felt he deserved it...he wanted badly to talk about it with her...to tell her everything. But that would cause her worry and put her in danger...because he knew she would not leave his side. He looked at her concerned and angry face and couldn't take it anymore. Thoughts of Sirius, Cedric, his past, his present, his destiny...all ran through his mind...he needed to tell someone...it had to be her.

Taking a shaky breath, Harry began to tell her all that he had been hiding since Sirius' death, and all that Dumbledore had told him. It flowed out of him and he spoke quickly because he was scared if he paused he wouldn't be able to go on..he did not stop until he was completely finished. When he was done, he stared into her eyes intently waiting on her reaction.

Unable to control it Hermione gasped and brought her hands up to her mouth..."Then...y-you're the...chosen one...it's you...oh Harry..."

And with that Harry collasped into her feeling weak as if he had just given her everything he had by telling her all that he had been holding inside for so long. He held on to her for dear life and let the tears fall.

Startled, Hermione almost dropped him but she steadied herself and held on tight, stroking his hair. She felt his sobs hammer through his body. She slowly bent down to the ground and he went with her and she cradled him in her arms and rocked him back and forth trying to sooth him. She began to cry as well. It hurt her so badly to see him this way, and she wished she never had to leave him. She could never leave him alone. She couldn't believe this...it had to be either him or Voldemort to die...and he had to be the one to do it...he had to be the one in the final battle...everyone's life rested on his shoulders...his 16 year old shoulders...Hermione never felt more despair for anyone than she felt for Harry at that moment and she squeezed him tighter.

Harry still continued to sob uncontrollably. He couldn't stop. He tried gasping for air but he couldn't. All of this had been inside him for so long. It felt so good to be comforted and felt safe while Hermione cradled him. He heard her hiccup from crying and only then did he look up at her face.

"I-I'm so sorry Hermione...I didn't mean to...its just I...I don't know..I don't want you in this...I can't lose you...I can't lose anyone else to death...I don't want this responsibility anymore...I hate myself...I hate my life. I want to be normal! I hate being Harry Potter! I AM SICK OF IT! I DON'T WANT TO BE HUMAN ANYMORE! I JUST WANT EVERYTHING TO END BUT NO! IT'S UP TO ME! NO PRESSURE RIGHT? IT IS UP TO ME TO SAVE EVERYONE! IT'S ALWAYS BEEN UP TO ME! WHY THE FUCK ME! WHY DID I HAVE TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR IT? IT COULD HAVE BEEN NEVILLE! BUT NO...! I WANT TO BE A NORMAL STUPID TEENAGER! I AM SICK OF EVERYONE STARING AT ME HERMIONE! I AM SICK OF EVERYONE LOOKING AT MY SCAR AND WHISPERING! I AM SICK OF EVERYONE THINKING THEY KNOW ME AND MY WHOLE LIFE STORY! I AM SICK OF RUMORS AT THIS SCHOOL! I AM SICK OF MALFOY! I KNOW WHEN I GO BACK INTO THAT CASTLE I WILL BE THE TALK OF THE SCHOOL FOR MONTHS! UNTIL ANOTHER STUPID THING I DO GETS OUT! I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE HERMIONE, I JUST CAN'T! I AM TIRED OF FEELING RESPONSIBLE FOR EVERYONES DEATH CAUSED BY VOLDEMORT! YOU ALMOST DIED! RON ALMOST DIED! EVERYONE ALMOST DIED IN THE MINISTRY BECAUSE OF ME!

"Don't Harry...please..." Hermione started frightened at the way he was screaming shrilly at her...almost as if in an insane and crazed manner.

"Don't you go feeling guilty..."

"NO BUT I DO HERMIONE! I FEEL LIKE EVERYTHING I COME IN CONTACT WITH I DESTROY! I DON'T EVEN WANT TO BE AROUND YOU AND RON ANYMORE BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO CAUSE ANYMORE TROUBLE! I CAN'T LOSE YOU! BUT I CAN'T STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM YOU! I CAN'T DO THAT! I AM TOO SELFISH! I CAN'T EVEN DO THAT RIGHT! I CAN'T DISTANCE MYSELF AWAY FROM EITHER OF YOU BECAUSE I...I NEED YOU!" MY ONLY STRENGTH AGAINST VOLDEMORT IS MY ONLY DOWNFALL! I LOVE TOO DAMN MUCH! AND I LOVE! I LOVE DEEPLY, PASSIONATELY! HOW IS THIS GOING TO HELP ME HERMIONE! IT JUST CAUSES ME TO HURT PEOPLE!

Hermione didn't know what to say and felt there was really nothing to say at this point. Nobody could understand how he felt but him...she wanted to badly to protect him and to make everything alright...during their entire friendship she has always worried about him and cared for him and always made sure he was okay. So now she did all she could do...as fresh tears began to fall from his eyes he sobbed more and he took off his glasses and pressed his palms into them to make the tears stop. Hermione took his hands in hers and held them tight. Harry wouldn't look at her but at the ground. His shoulders rising and falling heavily as he tried to catch his breath. He continued to cry and gasp for air. She slowly let go of his hands and brought her hands to the sides of his face and made him look up at her. She brought his head down and kissed the top of his head softly and brought him in for a hug... but Harry felt like he had never felt before.

He had this sudden strong urge to do something drastic. He felt so good to let this all out...and so thankful for Hermione that she was there and let him talk and did not try to think of any plans of action...or what book they would need to look at in the library to help with his situation. She just let him be and listened to him vent and get it all out. He had never opened up to anyone before...yet he just opened up to her and it felt great...though he was still terrified of his fate. He stopped her when she tried to pull him into her and he looked her right in the eye. He felt terrible for upsetting her and making her cry...even so she looked beautiful and he could not believe he had never noticed until then. Her hair as hanging in ringlets and water was dripping off of her curls into her face. Her eyes looked shining and beautiful with tears brimming at the edges and he knew what he wanted to do at that moment. He wasn't sure why but the emotion hit him full force...she actually cared for him. With her hands still on the sides of his face he gently cupped her face and let his fingers tangle up in her hair...

"Thank you...Hermione..." he said breathily "Thank you for always being here for me...when we were kids, last night, right now...and I know in the future..." he whispered... Trembling slightly, he closed his eyes, leaned in, and kissed her softly and tenatively...not knowing how she would react.

Hermione felt like there were electric currents pulsing through her entire body when she felt his soft lips press into hers. She closed her eyes and let herself enjoy it...in disbelief it was actually happening...

Harry slowly pulled away from her and he looked extremely nervous. His cheeks flushed and this time Hermione noticed and her cheeks followed suit. They both still had each others faces cuped in their hands when they heard someone running down the stone steps...it was Ron.

Ron saw them cupping eachother's face and felt a twinge of jealousy. "Surely not..." he thought. "Don't be a git...she is just trying to comfort him...she always does that."

Guilt surged through Hermione's body...she had told him on the train she did not want a relationship...because she did not want to be close to anyone...and now look at her. Hermione didn't know how she was going to explain it because she wasn't sure herself as to why she didn't mind Harry doing it. She hoped to Merlin he did not see.

Harry felt suddenly guilty as well. Ron was his best mate. He knew Ron had liked Hermione since Fourth year...and probably even longer before that...and he had betrayed his trust...and probably put Hermione in a position she did not want to be in.

"Harry..." Ron said breathlessly...he apparently had been running. "Are you alright mate? You had me so worried...I'm sorry I couldn't come out here with Hermione, but that bloody git Snape grabbed me and pulled me back into the classroom...and you should've seen Malfoy's face..."

Hermione and Harry both let out their breath they had been holding and relaxed. He had not seen...but how would they tell him? Would they tell him? Was there anything to tell or was it just a comforting kiss that did not mean anything except that they were friends comforting eachother.

The way Hermione felt before, during, and after that kiss sure didn't make it feel like it was a friendly thing...little did she know Harry felt the same way.

XxX