I am SO sorry this took so long to get out! To make it up to ya'll this is two parts, and this first one is a 1,700 word monster. (NOTE: If anybody was worried about me picking on Ron, the Pink bunny costume was his punishment for running Seamus off. That's all.) You may want to listen to "Killer Queen" by Queen before you read this. It's not neccessary, but it's a good song!
Chapter Twelve: Part One
"I Am Spartacus!"
Ginny pulled Tom into the Great Hall, which had been completely redecorated for the Masquerade Prom. The only light came from a collection of disco balls and candles burning in different colors that threw rainbow-y shadows on every surface. On each wall a banner from one of the four houses hung over a concession stand filled with sugary, hyperactivity inducing sweets. In one corner a platform had been raised for the band, and a dance floor had been roped off in the middle of the Hall. Clumps of costumed students drifted around the room, waiting for Dumbledore to announce the start of the festivities.
Ginny and Tom meandered over to the Gryffindor snack bar, labeled "Godric's Grub", and began eating sour, sugar-coated candy straws. Tom had a somewhat difficult time getting it under his mask, causing him to lash out in anger at a defenseless Hufflepuff dressed as a slice of pizza.
"Dumb costume anyway." Tom growled as he and Ginny watched the pizza run around with his hair on fire.
"You've got to be careful Tom. If Dumbledore suspects anything, he wouldn't hesitate to try and kill you." The girl warned.
"I suspect Dumbledore has been getting shots of firewhisky from the kitchens for the last few hours." Tom replied, watching Dumbledore weave about the Hall.
Ginny smiled and said, "It could be Jack Daniels. Professor Logan has been rather liberal with it all day."
At the moment Professor Logan was taking pulls from a hip flask while pulling his date, a Ravenclaw seventh year named Jean Grey, onto his lap. Either Logan hadn't bathed or shaved for a few days or he was dressed as Aragorn. Maybe both.
Ginny was surprised by the behavior of all the teachers. Logan was the only one with a student date, but most were openly drinking alcohol and acting very…umm unteacherlike.
Dumbledore, dressed as Colonel Sanders, was wildly waving his hands around, arguing with his date, Professor McGonagall, who was dressed as a roller skating waitress. Professor Flitwick, who had pulled a spandex book cover on his head and tied a black tablecloth around his neck, was lurking above the Ravenclaw's concession stand (Ravenclaw's Repast) pretending to be Batman. His date, Professor Sprout, was (unsurprisingly) dressed as a potted plant and seemed to be having an animated conversation with a bouquet of flowers on the table. Hagrid, (or as Tom called him "Fat Hairy Scapegoat") who was dancing the funky chicken with Professor Binns, was dressed as a fire hydrant.
Just then, Professor Snape walked into the Great Hall. A startled gasp emanated from the flabbergasted students. The sunglasses, the slicked back hair, the long black coat. The crowd began to murmur, "Neo?" and then to shout, "Neo! Neo! Neo!" until they forgot what they were shouting about and quieted back down. Snape had watched all this passively and then sat on one of the benches labeled "Wallflower" after the hubbub had died down.
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By this time all of the students had arrived, including Ron, Hermione, and Harry with Arwen tagging along. Harry and Arwen had very limited mobility in their crayon costumes so they had to hop to get where they wanted to go. Ron slouched and shuffled hoping no one would realize who was in the pink bunny costume, while Hermione tried to hurry him along.
On their way to "Godric's Grub", the quartet stopped by the Slytherin concession (Slytherin's Sustenance). All of the male Slytherins (Slytheranians? Slythereens?) seemed to be wearing Roman armor, so just to put a kink in their works, Ron asked, "Which one of you is Spartacus?"
One stood and said, "I am Spartacus."
Then behind him three others said, "I am Spartacus."
One by one they all joined in until the entire male populous of Slytherin House was shouting, "I am Spartacus!"
"Oh shut up, you fools." ,Draco shouted, "I told you people, I'm Spartacus. Just because I'm off getting drinks doesn't mean you can go usurping my position."
The Slytherins all began murmuring apologies and sitting down.
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Over in the corner the band was setting up. Half of the band members appeared to be ghosts and the other half seemed to be trying to look like them. The lead guitarist, one of the wraiths, opened his translucent case and pulled out a spectral guitar that dripped tongues of black flames. The more corporeal bass player hefted a blood-red bass guitar with "save the gerbils" scratched through the paint job. The drummer, one of the live ones, was setting up her kick drum which had the band's name and slogan, "The Phantasmal Phour: Big Bloody Bandstand Explosion Tour", painted on it in drippy black letters. The apparitional lead singer was floating a foot above the platform doing somersaults.
Ron sauntered over and asked, "Are you the imprint of a departed soul?"
The lead singer hung upside down and gave Ron a nasty glare that sent the wizard scurrying to the Gryffindor section.
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As the Phantasmal Phour started playing, Ginny pulled Tom onto the dance floor. The first dance was the Electric Slide and practically everyone joined in; though, Hagrid was a bit overenthusiastic, and ended up sending a few students flying into the walls. The Electric Slide morphed into the Virginia Reel and many of the teachers and older guests began dancing. Dumbledore was cutting the rug out there, and he danced pretty well too(That was horribly corny. I just couldn't resist). Ginny and Tom sat out a few songs until Ginny coerced Tom to do the Jitterbug with her. After that they collapsed onto the wallflower bench and threw bits of paper at a fifth year Gryffindor dressed as a pirate until he got them drinks.
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Meanwhile, Ron and Hermione were sitting on a bench watching the dancers. Hermione looked more than a little miffed.
Finally she burst out, "Ron, don't you ever dance? I can feel myself aging while we sit here!"
"Hermione," Ron said slowly, "I can't dance. At all. I'm horrible. Please do not make me embarrass myself anymore than I already have."
"PLEASE OH PLEASE! Ron, PLEASE!" Hermione begged.
"No!" Ron said emphatically.
"Fine! I'll go ask Draco!" Hermione screeched and hopped up to go through with her threat.
"If that MEANS you'll LEAVE me ALONE, that's FINE with ME!" Ron bellowed.
"ALRIGHT, I'LL GO!" Hermione screamed and stomped off.
"SHUT UP, YOU IDIOTS!" Everyone around them shouted.
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"Stupid, non-dancing, moronic, fat headed, funny looking, IDIOT!" Hermione's voice rose from a mutter to a shriek by the end of her tirade.
People stared at the fuming witch as she stomped over to the Slytherin side. Hermione marched up to Draco, looked him in the eye, and said, "Hey you! Wanna dance?"
Draco and Cho were sitting on the wallflower bench drinking punch when Hermione stormed over. Draco was wearing a burnished breastplate, leather skirt, and black-crested helmet. Cho, as a swan, was garbed in a flowing white dress, black flippers, and a bill tied over her mouth.
"Well, I've always loved a girl with pink hair. Ok, sure I'll dance." Draco calmly answered. He pushed Cho off of the bench, grabbed Hermione's hand, and led her to the dance floor where everyone was dancing in a conga line.
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Ginny and Tom were sitting on a bench catching their breath after a fast dance when Ron and Harry came over.
"Hey Ginny, who's your friend in the mask?" Harry asked nonchalantly.
"Him? Oh…um…This is…Marvin! He's visiting Hogsmeade for the…err…Wizard's Chess Tournament this weekend. He's a fabulous dancer isn't he?" Ginny improvised.
Tom began breathing loudly through his mouth and tried to make his voice as nasal as possible. "This party is so great. I'm glad I watched that 'Dancing Guide for the Mentally Handicapped' video."
"Well I'm glad that you finally decided to dump Voldemort." Tom made a noise that Harry misconstrued as a gasp. "You-Know-Who I mean. I think that Ron and I can help you find a good man, Ginny."
"That's very…sweet, Harry, but I think I can find my own boyfriends." Ginny smile merely bared her teeth.
"The last one you found was an evil overlord more than four times older than you." Ron pointed out dryly.
To forestall any violence, Ginny grabbed Tom's arm, quickly said, "It's been wonderful talking to you, but I think I'll just go and introduce Marvin to a few people. See ya later. bu-bye.", and then fled, pulling the wizard with her.
Ron and Harry watched them go and after a pause, which Ron spent gazing at Hermione doing the Bump with Draco, he said, "Harry, I think it's time a called in that favor with Scotty."
"Ok. Go ahead." Harry waved his hand airily and stared after Ginny.
Ron snatched a fuzzy pink mitten off and shoved his hand into his pocket, pulling out a square black item.
Speaking into the box he said, "It's time for you to pay up for that favor, Scotty. I want you to beam down Padme...I don't care if you need more power and don't call me captain!...Thank you, Scotty, give my regards to Kirk and Sulu…oh and tell Spock to shove it."
Ron slipped the box back into his pocket and pulled his mitten back on. The air started to shimmer in front of the wizard until it resolved itself into the form of Padme Amidala, Queen of Naboo.
"Ronny! It's so great to see you! How's Kirk and the gang?" Padme said as she gave Ron a hug.
"They're all doing as good as ever. How goes it in the Senate." Ron returned her hug.
"Oh, as well as can be expected I suppose." She said. "So what's this party for?"
"It's the Hogwarts Masquerade Prom. I was wondering if you'd like to be my date. A bit late to be asking, I know, but better late than never, right?" Ron slicked back a pink ear that had fallen in his face.
"Of course I'll be your date, Ronny! I'm already in costume it seems." And it was true. Padme's court regalia made an excellent costume.
Ron, in all his pink bunny glory, linked arms with Padme and strolled to the Gryffindor concession stand as Harry gaped.