No Regrets
A/n: My first attempt at a one-shot. Or any other type of story. Please Review. And please forgive the changing of persons, I know some of it is in third and some of it is in first. I hope you can figure it out.
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or anything related to it. Damn it.
Harry was beginning to wish that he hadn't done it, hadn't said what he said. It was starting to become too much of a hassle to keep up the charade. But what's done is done, and there was nothing he could do about it. On the plus side, he had been right. What he thought was going on was, even though it completely defied every law of nature.
Harry had started to suspect something was up a few months ago, but at the time he had quickly shoved the idea aside. It was simply too absurd. Just because he was acting different didn't mean anything. Then the feeling of being watched in class grew stronger, as did the feeling of being followed in the hallway. He knew without looking that his silver eyes were staring a hole into the back of his head, and Harry knew from experience that if he were to turn around, Draco Malfoy would blush and look away.
Years one through five at Hogwarts had consisted of them insulting each other only when they met by chance, like if they were in the same class, or had run into each other in the hallway. Now Draco seemed to "run into" him more often, almost as if he knew where Harry would be at any given time of day. They would insult each other, as usual, but Draco never seemed to be looking directly at him, past him, was more like it. And if their eyes ever did meet, he would stumble over his words, turn an interesting shade of pink, and walk away, mid-insult.
He was stalking him, and Harry didn't like it, he didn't like it at all, because it could only mean one of two things. Either Draco had been given orders to know where Harry was every minute of every day, and to watch him closely, or he was doing this on his own time, and for his own personal interest. Given the circumstances, Harry was inclined to believe the latter, and it highly disturbed him. Harry wasn't stupid; he knew exactly what was going on. For God knows whatever reason, Draco Malfoy had a crush on him.
Draco's POV
Why? Why am I damned to live this life? Why am I the only one who has to go through these things? Why must I suffer alone? Merlin, I never thought I was gay. To tell you the truth, I still can't believe that I am, but my latest infatuation points in that direction. Does liking another boy make me gay? I suppose it does, doesn't it? What would father say? Better yet, what would he say if I told him who? It's too awful to even think about, because what he would say wouldn't really matter. It's what he would do that would matter. I would be disowned if I was lucky. If I was really lucky, he might just kill me, and I wouldn't have to worry about it anymore.
To hell with Father. I have to tell Harry or I'll explode.
Harry remembered the conversation far to well. At the time he didn't know what he was doing. He only did what popped into his head.
"Harry, I don't know how to say this, but…"
"You're secretly gay, secretly in love with me, and think that I may feel the same way about you?"
"Well, yeah."
"Oh. Seriously? I was just kidding."
Draco looked down, and Harry saw his eyes cloud with tears.
"I'll just go then."
Harry reached out and grabbed his arm, without even thinking about what he was doing. He only knew that, somehow, he would benefit from this.
"No. Wait. I do Draco, I feel the same way."
Harry stared into his eyes, and saw pure relief. Unguarded emotion. It was strange, really, to see Malfoy's face without the mask, or the sneer. Very different.
Draco had started to lean in, and Harry saw what he was about to do. Oh shit, Harry thought. Why the hell did I just say that?
Then they had kissed, and Harry nearly gagged. Harry knew he wasn't gay, no way. He didn't have a problem with gay people, he had known Ron was gay ever since third year. Ron, Seamus, and Dean formed a sort of love triangle. Harry and Neville were the only strait boys in their year in Gryffindor.
It took Harry a while to figure out why he had done that. Why he had told Malfoy that he liked him too. But he finally got it. He finally understood why he did what he did. It would be a great way to get revenge. The only problem was that he didn't know when he should stop pretending.
2 Months Later
They were sitting together, on top of the astronomy tower, when Harry had done it. They had been a "couple" for a few months now, and the entire school knew. Harry didn't mind that. He had even gotten used to holding hands and kissing him. Harry was afraid for a little while though that his plan would backfire, and that he would actually start to fall for Malfoy. But he hadn't. While it turned out that Malfoy wasn't as bad as he made himself out to be, Harry still didn't like him. He could never forgive all the things the blonde boy had said to hurt him and his friends. Never.
That night, Draco found the courage to say what needed to be said. What he had wanted to say these past months to Harry, what he needed him to know. He leaned over, and whispered in his ear,
"I love you."
Harry turned and looked at him, and sneered. He saw the confusion on Malfoy's face, and he laughed at it. A cruel, harsh laugh.
"You have no idea how long I've wanted to hear you say that Malfoy."
Draco winced at hearing his surname coming out of Harry's mouth with such contempt. The same mouth that had tenderly, almost lovingly, whispered his first. Fearfully, he asked,
"Why?"
"Because that's when this would hurt the most. I hate you Malfoy. I despise you. I played you and you fell for it like a fool. I never liked you, never loved you, and you know what else, I'm not even gay!"
Harry watched with satisfaction as the gray eyes filled with tears. Draco let out one heart-broken sob, then another, until he was crying uncontrollably. Harry was surprised with himself. He never expected it to feel this good.
He watched for a little while. Watched while the pale boy cried and cried, sobs wracking his body. He soon grew bored, however, and got up to leave. He brushed the dirt off his pants and started to walk down the stairs. He didn't have any regrets.
From behind him he saw a flash of green light, and Draco stopped crying. Stopped making any noise at all. And without having to go and check, Harry knew that he had also stopped breathing. Harry smiled to himself. He didn't have any regrets at all.
