Talk About Rivalries

A/N: I know… But I have to thank TakerTakeMe for the inspiration to write a comedic kinda story. Lemme tell you, if you want to laugh, read one of her stories… But anyways, I also got the idea for this from the new movie; Yours Mine and Ours; and I guess the "we're moving to USA" commercial helped a little too. And of course no story would be complete without Seany nagging Chris and kicking John and Randy's asses; so she's in it too…insert a smiley… Plus, Eddie doesn't die, so he'll be in it too… So just sit back, relax; and cut the horrible humor some slack.

-this is my first attempt at this kinda thing; so be gentle

Somewhat Summary: So; what would happen if 18 of WWE's superstars were related directly? Matter-of-fact; as siblings? With Vince as the father of the family, what kind of conflicts and drama will arise between the family? Take a look, as we go into the intense rivalries and drama of the newest and biggest family of the WWE.

Chapter 1

"Where is my freeking frosted flakes!" There was an angry yell from the large kitchen, causing the action in the nearby game room to pause while they listened for any further ranting. The various games had been so loud before, and if it were Vince yelling he knew he would be better off if they listened. If he would have been listening though, he would have heard the slightly thick accent. "Hello! Anyone!"

John laughed, turning his Madden game back on. Who cared how René felt? If he had been up earlier for the big breakfast, then he would have gotten some of his frosted flakes. But he wasn't, and John took the liberty of giving them away to Trish and Muhammad. It was the Frenchman's own fault for staying out all night the night before.

"Oh my God!" Someone growled, turning off John's TV with a remote. Cena jumped to his feet, throwing the controller in the chair out of frustration. He spun around to face the culprit, but already knew who it was.

"Seany! God!"

"Can you not hear him?" Seany asked, throwing a finger in the direction of the kitchen. "Make him stop." She commanded, and although she was 6 months pregnant, John was genuinely scared of her- he knew what she was capable of doing, and wasn't about to let her do it.

"Ok, ok woman; lemme go…" John spat, sounding angry, but it just being a cover-up of defeat. "René! Shut the hell up, man!" John yelled from a few feet away, following through with what he had been threatened to do.

"You! It was you, wasn't it!" René asked in a bellow, dropping his bowl with a clatter on the wooden table.

"What if it was?"

"How dare you!" René screamed, stomping his foot in frustration. "You knew those were mine!"

"Hey, it's not like I ate them or anything."

"Then who did?"

"Trish."

John said honestly, a grin coming to his face when he thought about what Trish might do when René confronted her about it. It would be quite funny- he would actually pay to watch what would happen. But knowing how things worked, he wouldn't have to.

"That beach."

"Dammit René, SHUT UP!" Seany screamed from the other side of the kitchen, throwing a glass cup; and shattering against the wall directly behind where René's head had been milliseconds before.

Later that day…

"Woah-ho! The pregnant woman's gone psycho!" Eddie teased from across the table, his crooked smirk plastered on his face as they talked about what had happened earlier that morning.

"Not to mention zat Treesh was so stupid to eat zem; and zen Seany had to go and try to kill me." René whined, eating another bite of his lunch.

"If I had been trying to kill you, you'd be dead right now." Seany returned coldly, sending him a deadly look as she took a sip of her tea.

"Oh, yeah like zat would happen. You are a woman." René tilted his head briefly, as if to try and add ump to his insult.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Trish asked, as if ready to fight him there. She slammed her palms on the table as she got to her feet.

"It's supposed to mean zat you can't do anyzing." René replied. "See, you can't even understand zat."

"Oh no." Trish muttered. "You'd better shut up queer." She warned.

"Ah, and what are you going to do about it?" Muhammad asked a few seats down the table. "You girls can't do anything to us."

"Who asked you, terrorist?" Randy spoke coldly from across the table.

"And who asked you Orton?" Carlito said, putting his two cents in from the opposite side of Eddie. "Go tan your armpits and get out of everyone else's business."

Randy sent Carlito a 'go-to-hell' look. "Yeah, well at least I don't look like I have a chia-pet for a head."

Before anyone could say anything else, Muhammad and Trish were screaming at each other; René had once again opened his mouth about women, and Seany was too fed up with it. It only took one time for her to grab her bowl and launch the entire serving of potato salad in his face. And so a war erupted.

The longest a person staid clean was 5 seconds; and that was if you didn't count their hands getting dirty. Everyone was covered in food, screaming at each other, and throwing more food at whoever had pissed them off. René was trying to yell through the potato salad, unable to do so without spraying it across the fine linen that Linda had laid down. Seany's normally navy maternity blouse was drowned in ranch dressing; her stretchy jeans splotched with the new Italian dressing Vince had bought just for himself.

"What the hell is going on?" The loud and almost ground-shaking yell caused every muscle in the room to freeze and look over at Vince, whom had just entered the room and was looking particularly furious.

"Hs-he did it!" They all accused loudly in unison, flinging fingers at whomever they had been distinctively angry at. The look of steel on Vince's face didn't change.

"Who started it?"

"René!" Trish and Seany said simultaneously, throwing a point across the room.

"For once, just ONCE," Vince started, walking to René's side of the table, "CAN WE EAT LUNCH IN PEACE?" He asked in a bellow so loud and angry that a few of them could have sworn that the empty glasses on the shelf next to them were shaking.

"But… she ate my frosted flakes…" René spoke in a tiny voice.

"Oh did she now?" Vince asked strictly, receiving a short nod from Dupree. "Well, Trish, remind me to raise your pay-check."

"Yes!" Trish responded victoriously, punching the air. As Vince turned she stuck her tongue out at René, whom tossed his head once again in a snooty manner. Just another day in the McMahon paradise.

A/N: Ok, first chapter is short, sweet, and to the point. …insert cute little smiley… So tell me what you think; if I should keep it up or my humor's so bad I should drop it dead? Lol, tell me! Love ya; Comette