Disclaimer: This is the second time I'm posting this story, since it got removed from the site for reasons known to me...anyways, since I have a hunch that it MIGHT have been the "chat/script" format of my past disclaimers, I'm going to have to do away with all the fun disclaimer and be boring. I have to conform and say that I own nothing related to Pirates of The Caribbean and in fact the only things I do own fiction-wise are the characters that I come up with. bows
Summary: Christina and Will are now engaged. Yay!!! So then they get married and have kids and live happily ever after, right?…Not quite.
A/N: Chapter 18 - wow, this story is catching up with TYO. I think I'm making up for lost time. Read and review, por favor?
Elizabeth had indeed spent the better part of the night Christina left crying in her room, and no one came in to bother her. In her mind she kept replaying how Will had glared at her, the ice in his gaze had cut her to the core, made her feel like she had indeed been wrong about everything - that Will had been truthful when he told her that he had never loved her, not really. She cried because he had as good as told her that he couldn't be happy with her, that he wouldn't be happy with her. She wanted him to know that she would do everything she could to make him happy, and she tried to prove it by kissing him…isn't that what he wanted, for eight years? To be allowed to kiss her? To not worry about propriety, to call her Elizabeth instead of 'Miss Swann'. Wasn't it what she had dreamed about for years, to one day be Mrs. Turner? Why would he deny her this, this one thing that could make her the happiest woman in the world?
Will Turner loved her, she was certain of it. He had smiled at her, hadn't he? She had taken that for a yes…and she had waited for so long for him, they both had waited so long. He couldn't possibly change his mind so swiftly, could he?
And yet it had been nearly two weeks since he'd gone off following that wretched sister of hers. Christina was not someone who would usually be considered competition for Elizabeth Swann, and all of Port Royal knew it. Elizabeth was sure that even Christina knew it, and that was probably why they had such a strained relationship. Because, and Elizabeth was certain that she wasn't be conceited when she thought this way, Elizabeth was more of the perfect example of a proper woman of the 1700's. Elizabeth was tall and fair, with dark blonde hair and big brown eyes. She was thin and demure and cared for womanly things, such as clothing and jewelry. Aside from having to defend herself from time to time when she was captured by pirates, Elizabeth Swann was not a violent person. She was polite and attended the many dinner parties that her family was invited to, and danced with whatever suitor asked her to, and when it came to rejecting their proposals for marriage she was never nasty about it - in fact, it was very rare that she rejected them personally. Usually she got her father to write a note - who would dare to oppose the Governor, anyway?
And Elizabeth had proper maidenly fear of such things that Christina seemed to enjoy. Elizabeth was never taught how to fight with a sword - the very idea was preposterous to her, she wasn't even aware the women could swordfight in the first place! She never snuck out of the house to an unwed man's house, being unwed herself as it would cause people to talk. She never went out of the house unaccompanied by a maid of some sort. She didn't like horseback riding, the big animals frightened her even though she could admit that when she swallowed her fear she would probably be a respectable rider.
She had learned to read and write as was expected of a woman of her station as it was a privilege to learn how to read and write. But she never particularly enjoyed it - in what situation would she be asked her opinion of a book? She never talked back to man, it was not seemly for a woman to do so, and doing so could result in a beating if one talked back to the wrong man. In fact, the only time Elizabeth had ever taken a stand was when Jack Sparrow was about to be hanged. She supposed that that was a big enough event, but as it was her only one, she decided to ignore it.
Christina was the opposite of Elizabeth in every way imaginable. She had dark hair and olive skin that she never bothered to keep out of the sun, so she would, Elizabeth imagined, be as dark as the common townspeople by now. Her hair was never arranged in a way that it could stay, it was always half out of whatever style that Mary had put it in, and the powder that they wore never seemed to stay on Christina's face either, if she ever actually decided to put it on. That was not attractive in the high aristocratic society in which the Swann's lived - but, Elizabeth reminded herself, Will was not from a high aristocratic society. She shrugged, also reminding herself that the women of nobility were there to set an example of beauty that others could aspire to. Of course Will would not choose someone so like a commoner when he had Elizabeth - vastly considered the most beautiful woman in Port Royal - who loved him as well.
Christina had eyes so light hazel that they were almost yellow - like cat eyes, a witch's eye color, Elizabeth reflected. Christina was not as thin, either, and didn't seem to care too much if she was or wasn't. She didn't care, either, about clothes or jewelry, except for the black pearls that Jack Sparrow had given her. Christina wouldn't stop wearing the pearls even when their father had scolded her for it, calling them 'the heathen pearls'. Christina had, in fact, brushed off her father completely, and had continued by brushing off his reprimand as well.
Maybe her sister was a witch. Elizabeth admonished herself at the thought - there was no way the woman who Elizabeth had lived with for twenty years could be a witch. Christina had many faults, but devil-worship was not among them, of that Elizabeth was sure. She was surprised that she could think such a thing, considering how dangerous it was for anyone to be considered a witch. The punishment, if convicted, as like to that of a convicted pirate. Death, and nothing less.
No, Elizabeth decided, Christina was not a witch. Perhaps she had the same charm that their mother did, then. Mrs. Swann was beautiful, but not in the aristocratic way. Christina was almost the spitting image of their mother, despite what the portrait that Governor Swann had ordered to be painted portrayed. Mrs. Swann was not the blonde, pale, coifed lady in the portrait that hung in the den. No…she was as dark haired as her eldest daughter, and Christina had inherited her mother's bad habit of running away. If someone like the entirely apposite Governor Swann could fall in love with that type of woman, there was no reason why Will couldn't.
Elizabeth had spent the two weeks since Christina ran away in misery. She and her father had barely spoken to each other, and despite Elizabeth's popularity in Port Royal, it was only with the men who would consider themselves her suitors. The noble women of Port Royal didn't like Elizabeth much, they felt threatened by her - at least that is what her father assured her. It was very lonely, Elizabeth thought, but she realized that they at least made an effort to talk to her, as false as it might have been. They ignored Christina completely except to look at her as if she was a rather large bug that had flown in.
But Christina had other - better - friends, Elizabeth realized. Mary was closer to Christina that Elizabeth ever had been. Anita, the cook's assistant, respected Christina. Linda, the newest maid, was fifteen and barely knew anyone, but Elizabeth was bitterly sure that she would come to look up to Christina even though she was the worst example of a noble lady that could be found anywhere.
Christina was also best friends with Will. For eight years they'd been best friends. This bothered Elizabeth more than anything else that her sister did. That she could have the audacity to sneak out right under their father's nose and befriend the boy that Elizabeth had fallen so easily in love with - and then not tell Elizabeth that he had felt the same way about her! To never once mention it! And they called her, Elizabeth, selfish! Her sister was no better, and yet had no such accusations made.
But, Elizabeth realized, Christina was also very much in love with Will at the same time. Elizabeth couldn't imagine being in love with someone who didn't love her back - someone who loved someone else entirely, and then on top of it all didn't even realize that she loved him! Elizabeth felt a rush of pity for her sister.
Maybe she had been wrong in kissing Will. But how could it be so wrong, when it felt like something she'd been waiting to do since she knew what kissing was? His hands had been on her waist, they fit there perfectly it seemed. But they had been pushing her away, now that she thought about it. He wasn't supposed to push her away.
Then again, he wasn't supposed to have proposed to her sister, either.
Elizabeth sighed, lying on her bed and hugging a pillow to her. It seemed so very unfair that Will had gone off to save her sister. Maybe he felt like he had to, as it was partly his fault that she ran away in the first place. Maybe he would realized that it really was Elizabeth he loved, and perhaps Christina would be angry enough that she wouldn't want him anyway. He'd never given her a ring, after all, so nothing was set in stone. And he'd just bring Christina back to Port Royal - maybe their father would find a suitable man to wed Christina to - and Will would love Elizabeth. And Christina would be happy too, safe in a suitable marriage. She would learn to become a proper lady, with none of this sword fighting the Commodore and what not. She would learn to be a proper wife, and she would be happy. And maybe, finally, they could act like sisters instead of rivals. Elizabeth would never admit how she envied the freedom that Christina seemed to carry with her wherever she went. Christina might complain about being caged in, might say that Port Royal was her corset or what not, but at least she was brave enough - or careless enough - to speak her mind. It was very rare that Elizabeth ever did something like that. Her first taste of the freedom that Christina possessed was when she was captured by pirates, and her propriety mattered for very little. Elizabeth supposed that it was something remnant of being the younger sister, but she often felt like she could look up to Christina for never allowing herself to be inhibited by the society that she landed in. But Elizabeth would much rather be liked than scorned, even if people merely pretended to like her, or liked her only because she was pretty and rich.
It wouldn't matter once Will got back. Of that, Elizabeth was certain.
In front of me I saw Mary's eyes widen as she spotted who was behind me. I closed my eyes and swallowed, hoping against hope that it wasn't who I knew it must be. I waited, trying to get up the nerve to turn around, and at the same time forbidding myself not to. But, it seems, I can't control my limbs because ever so slowly, I turned and found myself face to face with -
"Will." I said softly, breathlessly, and hating how my voice sounded so childish at the same time. I felt many things at the same time, and I'm surprised that my brain or my heart didn't explode right then from the rush of thoughts and emotions that bombarded me. I was relieved, maybe because deep down I was expecting this or preparing myself for it, as doubtful as it was that Will would come after me. I was angry and indignant because here standing before me was the man who kissed my sister - whom he swore to me that he didn't love. I was sad, wondering if he was here just to take me back to Port Royal - which I wouldn't let him do, under any circumstances whatsoever! - and force me to watch his and Elizabeth's happy reunion. I was extremely happy, thinking that maybe he did love me, and he came here to tell me so and to apologized once again. I was frightened, worrying that if he did apologize and say that he loved me what would I do? My hand flew up to my chest, feeling through the fabric that Laurelyn had given me the claddagh ring that my father had given me when he beseeched me not to run away from love. I had put it on a chain and wore it with me, not feeling like I could part with it even if I wanted to. There was something poignant about the way my father explained what it meant, and I was nursing the hidden hope that maybe someday I'd find someone who I could give it to, who would be the claddagh for me. Who would love me as both a friend and a lover, and who would be always loyal to me. My fingers tightened around the metal band, the points of the crown of loyalty biting into my fingers.
"Christina," Will said softly, his eyes never leaving mine, and I was loathe to look away. Because looking away would make it as if I had done something wrong. No. But his voice nearly undid me and I came to terms then with exactly how much I loved this man, even as reluctant as I was to admit it. I swallowed hard again and let my hand drop loosely to my side, still feeling the sting of the metal crown in my flesh. The crown of loyalty.
Indignation won out in the end.
"What are you doing here, Will? Did Elizabeth send you? Does she want me to be her Maid of Honor? Because you can go right back to Port Royal and tell her I'd rather eat a sea slug than be a bridesmaid at your bloody wedding!"
"What are you talking about, Christina?" Will asked quietly, having the audacity to look hurt. I could have screamed. "Elizabeth and I aren't getting married."
Joy…I struggled to keep the scowl on my face even though his words had made such joy erupt in me. I narrowed my eyes at him. "Yet. You aren't getting married yet. But its just a matter of time - even if you lead me back to Port Royal under the pretenses - the obviously false pretenses - of its me that you love, both of us know that sooner or later you'll find your way back to Elizabeth's lips!"
Will looked like I had slapped him. "Christina, please." he said weakly. I crossed my arms over my chest, glaring. "Please what? What do you want Will, why did you come here? If Elizabeth didn't send you was it my father? Or did you want the glory of saving both the Governor's daughters from bad, scary pirates?" I spat. Jack, I noticed, could barely contain his smile.
"DO YOU FIND THIS ENTERTAINING, SPARROW?" I bellowed, losing my mind completely. He shrugged. "Actually, I do. A bit, love, just a bit. See, Gibbsie here and I had a bit of a bet going on…"
"A bet."
"Yeah… and I'm not going to hide it because I have nothin' to be ashamed of. Yeh too, Gibbs, buck up there, she's just a woman and she wont hurt you…Gibbs and I decided that we can't let such a sweet couple as ye and dear William stay separated long." I narrowed my eyes at him, completely not comprehending.
"And Will, well, he's about as predictable as old Norrington - who's probably coming for ye, too, Mary-belle - decent folk usually are predictable. And I knew and Gibbs knew that he'd come lookin' for ye, Miss Christina. And since lovely little Turner's father was a close friend of mine I decided I'd do a favor to old Bootstraps spawn and help him out a little."
I stared at Jack. My mouth must have been hanging open because he came over and quite blatantly chucked me under the chin, sneering a bit at the scowl on Will's face as he did so. "Don't ye be glaring at me, boy, I'm the one who got ye reunited with yer bonnie lass. It'll do ye good to be grateful." Jack snapped.
"There's nothing to be grateful about." I said nastily, pushing Jack's hand away. "You - both of you - betrayed me! And Jack, I trusted you to take me away from Port Royal -"
"Love, ye are away from Port Royal." Jack said smartly. I groaned. That was right, I was away from Port Royal. But I had expected to be taken away from Will by being taken away from Port Royal. And here he was, spoiling my plans. And a little part of me was ecstatic that here he was, spoiling my plans.
"I didna' betray you in the slightest, love, and I'm hurt that ye could think I did. Ol' Jack is an honorable man -"
"As honorable as an old sea-dog can be, Cap'n." Gibbs put in helpfully.
"Aye." Jack nodded. "But yeh see, Miss Christina, you said to take you away from Port Royal, not those inhabiting it. And if the son of my late friend Bootstrap - rest his soul - needs to find the love of his life, who am I to stand in his way, eh?"
"Aye!" the crew said. I pinched the bridge of my nose. Infuriating pirates.
"What's - what's that about the bet, then, Jack?" I asked, struggling to keep myself calm. I really wanted to smack Jack - I was probably the only woman on the planet who hadn't done so yet - and then hit Will really hard as well. And then kiss him.
"Ah, the bet. Well, Gibbs is loathe to explain it, the scalawag. Gibbs thought ye'd burst into tears at the sight of pretty William here, but I explained to him that ye'd more likely scream yerself hoarse. And I was right, pay up Gibbs." Jack said, walking over to him. I frowned even deeper.
"And yeh two lovebirds - get below and do whatever screaming ye need to down there, me crew doesn't need to hear it." Jack said. The crew looked sorely disappointed, as if all they really wanted was to hear whatever row Will and I were going to have. I walked to the cabins without looking once at Will, hearing Jack say that Mary would stay above with him.
"Just stay off my bed, Princess." Anamaria hissed wickedly at me as I wrenched open the door to the cabins and hurled myself down. I heard Will drop in behind me and heard him close the door. I suddenly felt a bit panicked, as if there wasn't enough room for me to breathe. I turned around and hugged my arms tightly around myself, staring up at him.
I didn't realize how much I truly missed seeing his face. He looked as if he hadn't had a good shave in the days since I'd run away, and the small mustache and goatee that he usually had was now accompanied by shadowy hair around the rest of his face. Contrary to popular belief, it was actually quite good looking in a dirty, rugged sort of way. I glared at him even more, upset that he could come after me looking so wonderful. How I was I supposed to stay mad at him?
Then the sight of him kissing Elizabeth made its way into my mind and I realized that before I was sad, and now I was just angry. I loathed his presence with everything I could.
"What do you want, Will?" I asked.
"Isn't it obvious? I want you, Christina, to be my wife." he countered, frowning at me. I laughed. "Sounds familiar. Isn't that right? Well, you should head on back to Port Royal, because this time around I'm going to say no."
Will looked as if he had expected this. "Well, then I intend on joining Jack's crew." he said. I blanched. "What?" I had certainly not been expecting that. Will shrugged, leaning against the pole of one of the bunks. "Jack said that one of his men decided he wanted to stay at Tortuga. I'm going to take his place." Will said, as if it had nothing to do with me at all.
"You can't do that William!" I shouted. I could not even imagine what it would be like to have Will as a crewmate on the Pearl. Having to sleep in the same room as him - and Jack would probably be nice enough to give us bunks next to each other - and to be around him day after day with him looking the way he did and asking me to marry him. But, I noticed, he hadn't said he loved me. Not yet.
"Of course I can, Jack already signed me as one of his newest crew members." Will said, imitating me and crossing his arms.
I stared at him, calculating. Gone was the Will who had stumbled upon the deck, looking at me apprehensively. "Fine," I said coolly, uncrossing my arms and staring at him triumphantly. "I'm going to stay at Tortuga, then."
"You can't." Will said grimly.
"Of course I can, William, what, is a big man like you going to stop me?" I sneered. He narrowed his eyes at me, a flash of hurt caressed his features before it was skillfully tucked away. I didn't remember Will being able to so easily hide what his felt, but I suppose everyone can change even in the short time slot of two weeks. I know I certainly did.
"I mean, you can't. We've set sail already, and Jack's not going to stop back at Tortuga - Commodore Norrington could be waiting for him there." Will explained. I clenched my hands into fists at my sides, desperate to find another way off this ship.
"Besides," Will said softly, "you wouldn't leave Mary here."
In my rage I heard him said "you wouldn't leave me here" and I glared at him. "What are you talking about, Will, of course I could leave you here! I left you at Port Royal didn't I? Do you think that you are so important to me that I can't live without you? Well, I proved you wrong, didn't I? I don't need you, Will Turner!" I shouted. He looked surprised and then his hurt showed more clearly than it had before.
"You're lying." he said pointedly, taking a step toward me. I took a step back, fixing a look of loathing back on my face. It had slipped off when I heard the certainty in his words - surely he couldn't know me so well that he could see right through me when I was screaming and beside myself.
"I heard what you said in Laurelyn's shop." he said softly, not taking another step but I moved back all the same. "You - what?" I asked hoarsely, knowing full well what I had said to Laurelyn concerning Will.
"You said that you still loved me…that you always would. So you are lying - aren't you?" Will added, looking furious with himself at the slight desperation in his voice. I overlooked it completely, thinking about all the ways I would skin Laurelyn alive next time I saw her.
I looked away suddenly, willing tears not to come into my eyes. Yes, I loved him. I loved him with everything I had, and I was willing to forgive him, but for my pride. I thought back to after the storm when I had told Jack that some things were more important than pride…was love more important, then? Of course it was, that I knew. But if I agreed to be with Will now I would always be wondering whether or not he was still in love with my sister. If I agreed for the second time to become Will's wife and we did indeed return to Port Royal, would I have to constantly wonder if Will was being faithful to me or not?
I met his eyes solemnly, and kept my face a mask. "No, I'm not lying." I said, not tearing my eyes away even when Will looked away and pressed a hand to his eyes. "Go back to Port Royal, Will." I said tiredly, brushing past him and walking back up to the deck.
Already I was forming a plan in my mind - why return to Port Royal when we could stay here? I would tell Will that yes, I was lying, and yes, I would marry him so long as we didn't go back to Port Royal. As long was we could stay here, on the Pearl, or find some other town to make our lives in far away from Elizabeth. But I thought of Mary, as valiant as she was trying to be upon the Pearl, and I knew that the sea was not for her. I knew that she was torn up with missing Commodore Norrington and staying here mostly because of her loyalty to me, and perhaps her fear of knowing that he could hate her. Even if she didn't love him, the sea was not for her.
Nor, I realized, was it for me. I could perhaps stay out here longer than Mary. Forever even, like my mother - but then, I didn't know if she had sailed away forever or if she had found another town to settle down in - but the sea would always be just a second home. Port Royal, as much as I hated to admit it, would always be home for me. And if we dropped Mary off at Port Royal, there was no way I could stand never seeing her again, not even for Will. And my father, as blustering as he is, loves me and I know that. I couldn't deliberately stay away forever, hurting him when the old wounds of my mother's departure still weighed heavy on his soul.
I saw the crew giving me odd looks, Anamaria looking sympathetic, and Jack looking knowing. I walked past them all, ignoring them, and made my way up the rigging to sit in the crow's nest. Mary was there, waiting for me, but we didn't need to talk. We stood looking down at the crew, watching as they ran busily to and fro. I saw Will walk up from the cabins and talk to Jack, and suddenly I was petrified that he'd be leaving. As much as I wanted to stay that I could bear it if he left, I knew that I wouldn't be able to. And I thought for a minute that if he really did love me as much as I loved him, then my leaving must have been a terrible thing to endure. And I felt horrible for maybe having put him through that, if indeed he loved me.
It seemed ironic to me that as soon as we'd planned to marry all we did was hurt each other. Engagement was supposed to be exciting and nerve-wracking - we were supposed to be setting a date for the wedding, and I was supposed to be fretting over the style of my dress and how I would wear my hair. Will was supposed to be getting taunted by his friends over the imprisonment of marriage, and though he would pretend to be scared witless, he'd be excited. I was supposed to be picking out plates and flowers, and in a perfect situation, Elizabeth would be right there with me, rehearsing my vows and suggesting names of children. Instead, I hadn't even gotten a ring and Will had been kissing Elizabeth. And I had run away.
If Will was telling Jack that he wanted to leave now, I knew that I'd never see him again. If he was listening to me and going back to Port Royal, I knew that I'd never summon up the courage to go after him. I scrambled down from the crow's nest and ran up to him.
"You're not leaving?" I asked, grabbing his arms so he would turn around. I brushed my hair out of my eyes impatiently. I didn't see the smug smile on Jack's face, or the wistful smile that taunted Anamaria. Will looked surprised. "I thought that's what you wanted me to do?" he said, perplexed.
"I know but -"
"But no, I'm -"
We said at the same time. I stopped, my stomach feeling like it was full of caterpillars who were restlessly weaving the baskets that would hold them until they were butterflies. Will smiled and the ship lurched and I stumbled, not paying attention. He grabbed my arm, steadying me, and it seemed like the ship became suddenly calm. I swallowed and touched the claddagh ring that lay above my heart, brushing his hand off my arm nervously.
"Well, we've set sail. So you can't go." I said, shrugging.
"And neither can you." Will answered. I licked my lips and nodded, turning away. Jack caught my eye and put his hand over his heart, as if he was touched. I glared at him and crawled my way back up to the crow's nest, sitting in a comfortable silence once again with Mary. I watched her, and it seemed to me that her brow was furrowed more often than not. She was always squinting in the sun and pulling her hat low over her eyes. I could tell that as much as she loved me and wanted to stay here for me, and as much as she found Jack's company amusing, eventually she'd want to go back to Port Royal. Eventually she'd have to leave, and the only question was how quickly that time would come.
Even if Will and I decided to sail for years, if we did make up and stay together, if I did agree once more to be his wife; even if for years I was afraid to go to Port Royal because of Elizabeth's presence, I knew that I wouldn't be able to stay on the Pearl forever either. No, sooner or later, I'd have to return to Port Royal as well.
A/N: Drama, drama, drama. Hope you enjoyed it!
-Crystyna