Disclaimer: I don't own Ross, Rachel, Chandler, Monica, Joey, Phoebe, or ANY of the League.

Feedback: I'd appreciate it.

Sean Malloy-1: A nice suggestion, but from what I've heard, someone else is already working on a story like that. You'll see it, but it won't be from me....

Krisian Rose: Might be worthwhile thinking about that suggestion regarding Joey having auditioned for a role as one of the League; I'll see what I can do. By the way, I apologise for the overlapping ideas thing, but it just... happened. Oh, and regarding the lengthy sentences thing, I guess I'm just so used by now to writing about events that happened last century that I forgot that I was setting this story in the modern day. Don't worry; I've fixed that problem (I hope). [Yeah, they are.] I will!

The One Where They Help Save the World

There had been a time when Rachel had been obsessed with shopping. She wouldn't deny that; in fact, back in the days before she'd moved in with Monica, she would have happily dropped everything if it would have allowed her the chance to go nuts in a shop.

But, looking at the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, she found herself realising that she'd been pretty easy to shop for, compared to how enthusiastic they were about the whole thing. It was like giving a knight every modern weapon imaginable and saying he could only have one; they wanted everything there.

Fortunately for her, Chandler and Phoebe had agreed to come along and help keep the League from acting too oddly in public, although they were still drawing stares from everyone they passed by. At the same time, Ross, Joey and Monica were arranging things in the apartments to allow the League to stay there for the duration of their time in the present, although they were hoping it wouldn't take long; they didn't want to attract attention by having a bunch of strangers in their apartments.

Rachel was still undecided on what they were going to get for Nemo to wear, and she was starting to think she might just leave him with what he was wearing; they could probably pass him off as a very devout Hindu, or Sikh, or whatever religion involved people wearing something that odd...

Really, it was Skinner, Jekyll and Mina that were giving them real trouble. Chandler and Phoebe were tracking down some clothes for Hartdegen, Sawyer, Mina and Jekyll, but it wasn't exactly easy; Hartdegen and Sawyer weren't especially picky about their clothing, Hartdegen being experience with this era from his trips to the future and Sawyer just being a very adaptable kind of guy, but Jekyll claimed he felt awkward in anything other than his own outfit, and Mina was mostly too shaken by the styles of the time to decide what she wanted for herself.

And as for Skinner...

Well, Rachel didn't even want to try to go there. When they started going through the shop, he flatly refused to wear anything if he couldn't get it off quickly in a combat situation, which would have meant that he would just have worn his coat all the way through the day, which would probably have ruined everything before it got started.

Eventually, Rachel had managed to convince that blending in while in public all the time was a lot more important than being able to go into actions a little bit of the time. Currently, he was changing into his new outfit that she'd picked out for him, consisting of a pair of black chinos with a dark grey shirt and black laceless shoes, although he insisted on keeping his original jacket and glasses.

"So, how's it coming along for Skinner and Nemo?" a voice said from behind her. Looking back, Rachel saw Chandler standing there, his hands in his pockets as he looked at her in an inquiring manner.

"Well, it took ages to convince Skinner to try anything, but I finally found something he'd be prepared to try on," Rachel replied. "As for Nemo, well, I'm thinking it might be easier to just leave him with what he's got; I mean, whatever he wears, the beard is going to make him stand out in a crowd."

"Yeah, and I don't see him taking the turban off anytime soon," Chandler said. "Maybe we could just, I dunno, claim he's a very devout member of some obscure religion that insists he dress like that all the time?"

Rachel nodded. "That could work," she said. Then she realised something. "Hey, where's Phoebe gone?"

"Oh, she headed off to help Jekyll find a decent shirt," Chandler replied. "He's prepared to try wearing jeans and trainers, but he'll only wear a shirt on top of everything else. I think he wants to try and maintain a professional appearance of some kind; you know, look a bit like a doctor?"

Rachel nodded. "Yeah, I think I get what he's saying. By the way, have you seen the other League members anywhere?"

"Well, Mina found an outfit that she liked, and Sawyer and Hartdegen found something good as well. Last I saw Nemo, he was looking around the electronics section, and I haven't seen Skinner for a while." Chandler smiled a little at that comment. "Of course, given that the man is invisible, he could be right in front of me and I wouldn't know..."

"He's not," Rachel replied. "As I told you, I found him a decent outfit and he's changing over... there," she said, indicating one of the changing rooms off to her left. "By the way, you mentioned that Tom, Mina and Alex found something they liked? Where are they changing?"

"Well, evidently you haven't been paying much attention to everything around you, or you'd know they were in those changing rooms as well." Chandler sighed and looked up at the roof. "You know, I never thought I'd be helping anyone do some shopping on this scale; for me, it's always in, get something, and go."

"And, of course, there's the little factor that we're helping people who saved the world over a century ago?" Rachel asked casually.

"Well, that too," Chandler shrugged. Then someone tapped the two friends on the shoulder. They turned around...

"How do I look?" Sawyer asked, scratching the back of his neck as he looked at his new friends.

"Nice," Rachel commented, looking him up and down with noticeable approval. Sawyer was dressed in a pair of jeans, white Addidas trainers, a dark blue t-shirt, and a brown leather jacket, under which he was wearing his Colts in their holsters. "How're the others doing?"

"Oh, they say they're doing fine; at least, Hartdegen and Mina are coping," Sawyer replied, as he sat down beside Rachel and Chandler. It was funny, really; he'd barely even met these guys, and he was already finding it easy to talk to them about things. "I don't know where the others are, though."

"Oh, Skinner's changing already, Nemo's wandering around the electronics area, and Phoebe's helping Jekyll pick out a decent shirt," Rachel replied, smiling at the attractive young man as he sat on the edge of the seat. She knew there were some rather good reasons she shouldn't flirt with this guy- the fact that he was technically almost a century older than she was, for one thing- but that didn't mean she couldn't have a little fun, right?

Besides, the guy was so dashing that she figured it would be a crime not to flirt with him...

"You know, that reminds me," Sawyer said, breaking Rachel's train of thought. "What did you get for Nemo to wear? I can't imagine he'd be very willing to change around that much."

"Oh, we're thinking of just leaving him in what he's got," Chandler said. "For a cover story, I was thinking we'd just say he's a very, very, very devout member of... some obscure religion that nobody knows anything about baring the fact that it's Indian."

"Could work," Sawyer shrugged, and glanced over at the two of them. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure," Rachel replied, looking back at Sawyer.

"After we questioned you guys about yourselves, it's only fair you should ask us," Chandler added. "So, what do you want to ask us?"

"Well... care to give me a bit of background on you guys?" Sawyer asked. "I mean, you all know about the pasts of at least some of us, but we know 'zip-doodly-squat', as Skinner might say, about you six."

Rachel and Chandler looked at each other, shrugged, and turned to face Sawyer.

"Fair enough," Chandler replied. "In a nutshell, Ross and Monica knew each other first, being brother and sister, and Rachel was Monica's best friend back in her early schooldays. I met Ross in college, and Monica took Phoebe off the streets, since she'd... run away from home after her mother killed herself."

"Couldn't her father have taken care of her?" Sawyer asked.

"No, he left her when she was only a baby," Chandler replied. "Her mother had basically just gotten married a bunch of times, turned to drugs, and then killed herself when Phoebe was thirteen. She was on the streets for some years until Monica took her off and helped her get her life started again.

"Geez..." Sawyer said, sighing loudly. He couldn't imagine having to deal with that; he may have lost his parents himself, but at least it had been from natural causes. Besides, he'd had Aunt Polly to take him in afterwards. "That's tough. That is really tough."

"Yeah..." Rachel commented. "She doesn't talk about it much, but it had a still-noticeable effect on her; whenever the subject of her parents comes up, she gets a lot less... cheery, than she is normally."

"Ah," Sawyer said, unsure what else to say. "And... Joey?"

"Oh, he just replied to my request for a roommate a few years ago," Chandler replied. "We quickly became friends, and, well, there you are. We all get along well, although there's been a couple of problems now and again."

"Such as?" Sawyer asked.

"Oh, you know.... Little things," Rachel replied. "Nothing major, baring a couple of things, mostly involving our relationships."

"Relationships?" Sawyer asked, a grin on his face. "It's a hundred years on from my time and people still have relationship issues? I would have thought they were past that difficulty by now!"

"Well, we haven't," Chandler replied. "Of course, it's mostly been problems involving two people loving the same person; me falling for Joey's girlfriend, him and Ross dating the same girl, Rachel and Ross having a kid... you know, your everyday sort of problems."

"Everyday?" Sawyer said, sounding a little surprised. "Hello; I'm from last century? In my time, it was concerned unusual to have a kid if you weren't married!"

Rachel blinked and then chuckled.

"Sorry; I forgot about the whole 'Tom's from the past' thing," she said, in answer to Sawyer and Chandler's baffled looks. She turned to look at Sawyer. "It was just a one-night stand thing; Ross and I were preparing the invitations for Monica and Chandler's wedding, and, somehow, we ended up... sleeping together. Well, hey; he was desperate for sex, and I was just feeling a little lonely, so... things happen, and I ended up pregnant."

"I see..." Sawyer said, looking over at Rachel with a curious expression.

"Of course, given that they used to date, it's not as big a deal as it could have been," Chandler added. "Plus, there's been a couple of moments between them following Emma's birth, so, you know, it's been a complicated time for their relationship."

"Really?" Sawyer said, smiling at Rachel. "Well, hey, hope things work out for you and Ross; can't be easy being a single parent."

Rachel looked over at him with a slightly annoyed expression on her face, and drew her fingers across her mouth to try and make him shut up. Chandler looked over at her with some suspicion, and then enlightenment dawned.

"Oh my-" he began, but then Sawyer interrupted.

"Hey, don't mind if I just go off and find Nemo and Jekyll, do you?" he asked. "I mean, it's been nice talking to you guys and all, but I need to make sure that the others are OK; the sooner we get everything together, the better."

"Sure, go ahead," Rachel said absentmindedly, smiling at him as he got up and began to walk away. She started to get up and follow him, but Chandler grabbed her arm before she could get up.

"What the hell are you doing?" he hissed, his eyes constantly flicking towards Sawyer to see if he was out of earshot yet.

"What?" Rachel asked. "Aren't I allowed to flirt with a cute guy?"

"Not when the guy in question is technically old enough to be your great- grandfather!" Chandler replied, raising his voice to normal volume as Sawyer moved out of range. "Rachel, he died before you were even born! Either that, or he died shortly after you were born! That does not make for a good relationship! Just... cut out the flirting, OK?"

"OK," Rachel said, in an exasperated tone of voice that suggested to Chandler that she wouldn't stop trying to flirt with Tom Sawyer for a while yet.

"I mean it!" he hissed at her. He couldn't believe this; a potential crisis on their hands, working with some of the greatest literary characters from the Victorian era, and Rachel was trying to flirt with one of them! "Just cut out the flirting before something bad-"

The sound of gunfire tore through the shopping centre.