Just to avoid any confusion, the main character is Shaera, who is in a band with Jovian and Kaz. There is the ambiguous relationship with June and a mystery man who is following up on Shaera, both of whom you will meet again in this chapter.
Other characters mentioned are Thistle, who is Shaera's agent. And a few fans, who have attempted or committed suicide.
There is also Rosa, who is Jovian & Kaz's grandmotherly neighbour and who has her eye on Jovian.
Thanks for following this story – and to the reviewers, who inspired me to keep writing despite the busy schedule.
Chapter 4 is for Mental Twitch 'Sh33r's, Piscean Wisdom, Dark Angel's Blue Fire and Pixie Lew.
Any comments/ suggestions are welcome!
CHAPTER 4
Whether Sirens had fish or bird bodies, clearly they symbolize a dual nature-- part animal, part human. Birds are often associated as mediaries between the material and spiritual worlds, and have been known to transport the dead on their wings.
Hi, This is Thistle. I not at home right now – but leave a message after the tone and I'll get back to you as soon as possible…ciao -
"Thistle? It's me. Where have you been? I've been trying to contact you for the past week! I need to talk to you about the band…" Shaera's fingers closed around the latest article, scrunching it into a ball and aimed it towards the bin. "And the media. The newspapers have been going crazy…and a few days ago, there was this rude cop… nevermind. Call me soon ok?"
Shaera hung the receiver in the cradle and leaned on the wall, frowning.
Where was she? Why wasn't she replying?
As a friend, slight, blonde haired Thistle was deceptively strong and smart. As an agent, Thistle was organized to the extreme. Shaera had expected Thistle to knock on her door days ago to devise some kind of media control, but Thistle was nowhere to be seen. Or contacted.
The last time this ever happened… no, this had never happened before. The small knot of tension in her stomach tightened, and the slight throbbing pulse at the back of her mind threatened an oncoming headache.
"Shaera?" She turned her head to see June standing in the hallway, wringing her hands on an old, fraying apron. "Honey, when did you come in? I didn't hear you…"
"I just came in to make a call. I can't contact Thistle… something's wrong." Her eyes sharpened as June made a start at Thistle's name. "Have you heard from her?"
"Ah… last time I spoke to her she wasn't feeling well." Usually understated but immaculately tidy, June's short hair was wayward and unbrushed, with uncharacteristic hollows under her eyes. Something seemed to have reached under her unfaltering calm and ruffled her.
"You don't look so good today yourself. Do you want to go lie down or something?"
June sniffed. "Night world people don't get sick," she said, unaware that she had just contradicted herself.
"June…"
"Why didn't you ever call me 'Mother'?" The moment it slipped out from her lips, June wished she could bite them back. Perhaps it was the fatigue, the sudden loneliness that made her speak without thinking.
Immediately, Shaera's expression turned wary. Usually they avoided having this conversation. Shifting from the wall, uneasily, Shaera mumbled, "Because technically, you aren't… because I'm…"
Adopted.
And it had never felt right to call her 'Mother'. But Shaera didn't want to say it, didn't want to see June grimace at those words. But she might as well have.
June's lips were tight.
"And you certainly don't look like anyone's mother. You look my age, what if humans heard?" Shaera added. She had meant it to be light-hearted, but it didn't seem to cheer June up.
She was staring at Shaera in a strange way.
Then, as if to wake herself up, she shook her head and smiled wryly, a familiar expression that unknotted some of the building tension. "I'm not feeling quite right today, honey, you better let me get some rest."
"If you're sure…" Shaera stopped at the front door and studied the women that had brought her up, the mask of Night World youth stretched across a pretty, ageless body. "Take care."
"Wait," June reached out and placed a small packet into Shaera's hands. "You'll need to take these. One before bed each night."
Shaera looked at the plastic wrapping and saw small round pills. "These again?"
" It will help you sleep. I know you've had nightmares, quit suffering silently. You don't have to be a martyr. We're here to help you."
"We?" Arching a brow, Shaera slipped the packet into her pocket.
"Me. Thistle. Your friends – the boys from your band."
Shaera hesitated by the door and flashed her a rare smile, unguarded and young. "Thanks, June."
June watched her leave, a solitary girl climbing into the car with long legs and felt her heart weigh heavy as the engine revved. Watching Shaera's car disappear into the distance, she sent a short prayer to the Goddess.
Forgive me.
A long, dark figure unfurled himself from the shadows of the porch, where he had been watching the exchange silently.
"So, tell me, Ms. Harman. How does it feel to lie to a loved one… day after day?"
June's head snapped around, and eyes widening, took in the tall man: the immaculate suit he wore, the folder he held, and the unearthly beautiful profile that clearly spelt Night-Worlder.
"I beg your pardon!"
"Beg all you like," He had the lips of an aristocrat, carved and full, stretched into a smile that didn't reach in eyes. "But it won't change a thing."
"Who do you think you are?" Drawing herself up in fury, June clenched her fists and glared at the intruder. "Get off my property!"
"I'm Rath." He said, with a politeness that bordered on insolence. He seemed more amused than intimidated. His eyes trailed over her in an once-over, missing nothing, lingering on her frayed apron. "I have been watching Shaera… and you."
Witch.
As if sensing his thoughts, she stiffened. Inexplicably sweating, she groped for the steel handle, preparing to slam the door in his arrogant face. "I have nothing to say to you."
"Will this change your mind?" With cruel and deliberate ease, he opened the folder.
It took a long moment to register in June's mind what she was seeing. Fear quickly followed disbelief. Her heart missed a beat. "How…?"
Rath smiled as he watched the blood drain from her face, relishing the scent of fear, his honed senses tuned to the way her breath shook and her pulse faltered slightly.
Witches were so vulnerable, really… without their potions and spells they were… so human. Like prey.
Ignoring the mild tingle in his jaw and the fangs aching to grow and feed, He gave her a little push inside and stepped through the door after her. "I think it's time we had a talk."
And if you this is bad now, think again. He mused. You had it coming…
The hunt had only just started.
"Earth to Kaz…" Jovian intoned, wriggling his fingers in true Martian style. When that didn't work he tried the robotic voice he'd been practicing last week, "Misterrr Kaaz Hawkinns. What iss goin' onn… inside that thick head of yours?"
Kaz sighed. He turned away from the kitchen window he'd been staring out of and cut his eyes to Jovian. "What?"
Giving up on the robot act – who wants to be a robot, anyway? – Jovian seated himself opposite his friend. "Lighten up, dude." He suggested diplomatically. "What's stuck up your butt?"
"Why don't you be a good pet and let me wallow in my depression?" Kaz muttered, only half joking.
Lifting both hands in a shrug, Jovian heroically ignored the remark. "I thought all that oxygen in the blood you vampires drink was meant to make you high."
Lifting a brow, Kaz retorted "Just like the protein in the meat you shifters eat – raw, I might add – is meant to make you – what, healthier? Smarter?"
"You're asking me?" Jovian grinned, "Why don't you take that question down to our local doctor? Now that woman is fineee, I could fake stomach aches every day just to –"
"Can we talk about this some other time?" Kaz groaned.
Assembling his lips into something precariously close to a pout, the blonde shifter said peevishly, "You never want to hear about my women."
"Your women?" Kaz asked incredulously, and in spite of himself felt a grin tug at his lips.
Well… there. He had cheered his friend up. Maybe not the way he intended to, but Kaz laughing at him was better than not laughing at all, right?
"Hey," He protested, "Some people want me, I'm not that unlovable. We have a pretty awesome fan base now, you and me."
Kaz felt his eyes drawn outside the window again, "I'm not interested."
Jovian leaned forward, his blue eyes serious all of a sudden. "Kaz…"
"Uh…" Taken aback at the sudden change, Kaz frowned. "What?"
His voice quiet, Jovian said, "You can tell me, you know… you don't have to hide it."
An image of Shaera drifted across Kaz's mind, the conflicting emotions that those emerald eyes had expressed before they shifted away. The way she had paused before walking out on him, the door slamming in his face.
What am I to you?
He felt pain stab at his heart. "I …"
How could he express feelings so deep even he himself was troubled by? How could the words cross his lips… that he loved someone… beyond all reason? More than he imagined he was capable of.
That before he had been foolish enough to express his feelings, for a brief time he and Shaera had been close, and he thought he'd glimpsed a part of her that no one else had seen?
Which only made the loss of that bond harder.
That he'd went from a good friend to a complication in the space of less than three seconds, when he'd uttered those damning words.
I'm falling for you.
And the hurt he felt when she froze on him, the laughter dying between them.
Best friend or not, how could Jovian understand this?
Life was simple for Jovian: he was so easygoing, absent minded and - although Kaz would rather bite off his tongue rather than admit it - oddly sweet.
"It doesn't make a difference," his friend was saying now, earnestly.
Absurdly touched, Kaz wondered if he should reconsider the proposal to move houses – and quit teasing his buddy about their next-door neighbour, Grandma Rosa. "Jovian…"
"Really… I don't mind if you're gay."
Kaz reared forwards. "What!"
Jovian frowned, and repeated it slowly as if Kaz was a dim student, "I said, I don't mind if you're-"
"I know what you said!" Spluttered Kaz. "I just- it's not…"
"What is it, man? Spit it out,"
The door opened just as Kaz stood up and shouted, "I'm NOT GAY!"
The room was thrown in sudden silence, as Jovian stared at Kaz, and Kaz stared at Shaera, who had just walked in the door.
She looked at them both, slightly bemused. "Am I interrupting something?"
"No!" They both said quickly.
"Alriight," Shaera tried to hide a smile, "you shouldn't leave your front door unlocked that that. Anyone could waltz right in… your next door neighbour, for instance."
"That nymphomaniac!" Jovian looked horrified at the very idea.
Kaz exchanged an amused look with Shaera, followed by a sharp twinge of nostalgia. They hadn't been on comfortable terms for all too long.
Shaera averted her gaze. "Uh… Jovian?" She said, looking at her feet as if they suddenly intrigued her. "I need to have a word with Kaz."
"Oh, right." Jovian nodded. "Go ahead."
He remained where he was.
They both looked at him expectantly.
"Alone?" Shaera supplied.
The penny dropped. "Ohhh…! Well… I'll be…in the other room. Eavesdropping. I mean. Watching TV."
Winking at Kaz, he sauntered out.
The two of them were left in the kitchen, suddenly awkward, suddenly strangers.
Coughing to cover his sudden nervousness - What is this? I'm not a kid with a crush! - Kaz asked, "You were saying…?"
Her voice carefully neutral, Shaera said quietly. "It's not you."
Confused, Kaz simply shook his head.
"It's… not personal."
Coolly, he replied. "You should know by now that anything you say is deeply personal."
She closed her eyes.
"I think… I have a problem with… attachment. Relationships." Shaera ran a hand over her face, suddenly looking tired. "I'm not doing this right."
"There's no right or wrong between us… just tell me the truth."
"I never keep phone numbers." The words tumbled out in a rush, as she looked straight into his eyes. "I never go out with someone twice. I don't like to get involved… It's who I am… and I'm not about to make apologies for it."
He looked at her, waiting. Listening. He had always been a good listener.
"I don't have many friends. You were… you are… a good friend. But I don't do relationships… not even for you."
Angry, Kaz stood up. "Why don't you just come out and say it? That this is the sorry-but-you-re-just-a-friend speech? You don't have to wrap it up nicely for me." His words came out fiercer than he had intended, branching out from the hurt she elicited.
Instead of backing away or looking at him with regret – or worse, pity - Shaera's green eyes flashed with anger of her own. "You're the one cheapening our friendship. Do you know what it means to me? You think I haven't thought about a relationship?"
"Then what's the problem?"
"I can't do it!" She yelled, good intentions flying out the window. "I've never been able to! There's just… something inside me. I know it would be wrong."
He looked so male, so confused that for a split second Shaera felt irrationally girly. She has always been aware of her femininity – explored it, exploited it… but never associated herself with the silly girlish games and weaknesses.
"Why." His voice sounded raw and foreign from his own lips.
"There are things… I can't explain." Aggravated, she jammed her hands in her pockets. "Friendship is the best I can offer you. Take it or leave it."
It was said in more or less a snarl; very different to the gentle explanation she had in mind when she was hit by the guilt after walking out on him last time. Guilt, confusion, and a strange, penetrating sorrow.
How could she explain something she didn't completely understand herself?
She lifted her hand to her temple to regain some sanity, and a small package fell from her pocket.
Kaz bent down and picked it up off the floor, staring at the round pills it contained underneath the clear plastic. She tried to snatch it off him but he deflected her. "Why…?"
"Sleeping pills." She said quickly, hating to expose her weakness. The nightmares that kept her restless like a terrible, dark secret. Annoyed, she reached for it again. "Give them back."
"Shaera…" Kaz said slowly, "Where did you get these?"
"June gave them to me today,"
"June?" He looked incredulous. "Your mother gave you these!"
"What?" She said defensively, "So I have a little trouble with sleeping."
"Shaera… these aren't sleeping pills. I've seen these before. They are memory suppressors. Very powerful, very effective... And they're illegal."