Chapter 6: Rein of Jealously
Clark waited until Lois and her "fiancé" was completely out of sight before he began to rant about them. "Can you believe them, 7 months! They only been together for 7 months." He shook his head and ate some more of their popcorn. He really didn't want this marriage to happen and he didn't know why.
"It's not that uncommon Clark, people get married in 2 months time!" She said matter-of-factly. Lana swiftly walked ahead of him not particularly wanting to hear about Lois or Skip. To her it was none of her business and she was a little annoyed by Clark caring so much.
"I know Lois and 7 months is too soon." He jogged and caught up to her. "I should talk to her."
"NO!" She stopped walking and put her hand against his chest stopping him from walking all so. "I mean no…I'm sure she wouldn't like that. How would you feel if someone tells you what you can and can not do?"
He sighed in defeat knowing that she was right but he had to talk to her. "Look I'm just going to give her some friendly advice. Why do you care so much anyway?" He asked curiously.
"Because I know how you feel about her Clark." It was hard for her to say that to him but she finally let it out. She hated the way he looked at her, they way he kept Lois as a mystery to her, she hated that she was his first love and that he couldn't get over her. Somehow she knew that deep down he still loved Lois even if he failed to admit it to himself, he loved her and wanted to be with her. And Lana was afraid that he wouldn't love her just as much.
"What! Are you kidding me! I do not have feels for her." He denied it with all his might, almost dropping the popcorn.
Lana felt the tears welling at her eyes. "YES YOU DO CLARK!" She said practically shouting. "I told you I loved you last night and you said nothing back. I know it's because of Lois, because you can't let her go so you close off your heart to me." A tear rolled down her cheek, people were looking now.
"Lana." Clark said faintly. "Lois has nothing to do with it." Does it? He was so confused.
"Look me in my eye and tell me that you do not love her." She looked into his eyes but he avoided her eyes.
"Lana…I." He had nothing to say he just stood there shocked and confused. The truth hit him like a ton of bricks I love Lois, I'm still in love with Lois but I think I'm falling in love with Lana
"I thought so." She turned and walked off trying her hardest not to cry. But it was so hard to love some one and not have your feelings returned. She fell in love with him so quickly after only 1 month and some weeks, she wanted to be his wife and be the mother of his children. That was in the future of course Lana didn't want to move to fast but, all she wanted to know was that he loved her and wanted to be with her as much as she did.
Clark watched as she walked away and entered the dark movie room. He felt like crying because he didn't know what to do. In his head he tried best to analyze the situation, this week he was planing on romancing Lana taking her to the movies, cooking her dinner, and taking her to many of his teenage hand out spots. Clark's plan in finding out if he really loved her or not, she makes him realize that he still loves Lois.
He couldn't even deny it because the sight of Lois and Skip together ached his heart. As hard as it was for him to admit it he still felt good inside every time he saw her, at the Talon and just a few minutes ago.
He walked up to movie room that Lana went in and saw that Grease was playing inside. Clark sighed and took a seat on the bench aside from door.
Minutes passed and sat there thinking of what to do with his head in his hands. He looked up when he felt someone hovering above him. "Lois?"
"Hey Clark, whatcha' doing sitting outside?" She asked curiously and sat next to him.
"Umm, I just needed some air." He really didn't want to tell her that he and Lana got into a fight about her and that he was afraid of going in. She nodded. "So what are you doing out here?"
"I was bored, Skip wanted to see "World of War." Which I saw a million times, so I just walked out. I bet he doesn't even know that I'm gone." She gave him a sweet smile.
Clark stared at her getting lost in her smile and her eyes; Lois caught on and turned her head. "Why are you doing this?" He blurred out by accident; it was more of an inside thought.
"Doing what?"
"Getting married?"
"Because I love him, Clark. He is sweet, stable, and he wants a lot of what I want."
"And what's that?"
"A normal life, a big family, we both want out of Smallville and we both have similar goals in life." He nodded. She wanted a normal life and he knew that he would not be able to give it to her. "I hope it works out." Lana walked out of the movie room feeling guilty about leaving Clark, once she exited the room she saw Lois talking to Clark, instead of interrupting she tuned in to their conversation.
"I hope so too."
"Lois."
"Yeah?"
He took a deep breath "I love you…" Lois was shocked and didn't what to say just looked at him with a blank stare. Lana began to cry loudly and Clark turned to see her behind him. "Lana! It's not what you think!" He was now terrified, terrified of end of him and Lana.
"NO CLARK, SAY NO MORE." Clark tried to reach out to her but she ran away. The words she wanted to hear from him were said but to another woman.
Lana ran for dear life, trying her hardest to get way from Clark who was running after her. "Lana come back!" He called out. "It's not what it looks like."
Lana closed her eyes and tried her hardest not to listen to his pleas. "Please stop running." Clark begged desperately wanting time to explain.
She stopped once she felt his hands on her shoulder keeping her from running away. "Let go of me!" Lana shouted in anger, quickly shaking loose from his hands. "It's over, go be with you precious Lois. I'm sure she will dump Skip for you!" By this time people walking by in the streets stopped to look at the show; paying close attention. "I should not be here." Lana said between sniffles.
"I need you here…I need you here with me…don't go." Clark himself was now in tears. "I may have been confused but I will be lost without you. You changed me, you loved me and I love you."
Lana looked at him and began to laugh not believing his words. "You love me? That's why you were telling Lois you love her?" She said with some sarcasm.
Clark took her hand and held it up against his cheek. "Lana baby, it's not what you think."
"What else could it mean Clark besides the fact that you want to be with her not me?" She said faintly.
"Me admitting to Lois that I love her was the only way I can truly let her go. The pass 4 years I denied the fact that I loved her. She broke my heart and stepped on it, I would have hated myself if I admitted to still loving her after all she's done…so I denied it. I was even going to ask her to marry me, I had the whole thing planned." He shook his head.
"You were?" She gently ran her hand along his cheek and jaw.
"She left me before I had the chance to ask, she couldn't expect me for who I am. After that I hardened my heart from love saying that I couldn't and didn't love her anymore and I would never love anyone else because I feared another heartbreak. To me admitting to her that I still do love her and that I always will love her, helps me to open up and soften my heart towards others." He carefully wiped the tears off of her cheeks.
"I was going to tell her that I was no longer going to be victim to the pain she put me through, I would no longer feel sorry for myself, hate myself for who I am and who I'm not and shut off from people. I was going to tell her that just like she found Skip, I found you. I realized that not only do I love you that I'm in love with you. I may still love Lois but I'm not in love with her…I knew I loved you since the day you threw up all over my shirt and I still wanted to keep you around. I knew I was in love with you since our first kiss."
Lana smiled widely and giggled a little. "Really?"
"Really!" He said loudly picking her up and spinning her around. "Really." He repeated still spinning her around while Lana giggled and screamed playfully. The audience around them began to clap and cheer loudly. Clark rest her down realizing the crowd around them, he even saw the Sheriff in the crowd. HOW EMBARRASSING But anything to get Lana back.
Lana on the other hand was enjoying the attention, waving and smiling at them. But moments passed and they slowly fizzled away, shaking Lana's hand and patting Clark on the back. Once they were left to themselves Clark stood in front of her and held her hands in his. "Lana this is a huge step for me, I want you know that I come with a lot of baggage, a lot more that just Lois." He warned.
She nodded. "We all have baggage Clark and I will except yours if you except mine." Lana smiled and pulled him into a hug. "I love you."
"I love you too." He lowered his head and gave her a sweet but very passionate kiss. Put all the love and lust he could display in public. Clark was very happy for finally opening up to her, he did love her and he was glad that he could let go of Lois and take in Lana. Although he was happy, at the back of his mind he couldn't help but to think about the burden of his secret and what Lana said about aliens. But that was tomorrow's trouble.
He pulled away from the kiss, leaving Lana very contented yet ready for more. "How about we go back in, and watch the rest of the Movies."
"Ok." She said softly, still trying to recover from their kiss. "Maybe we can watch Grease again."