Disclaimers: Mutant Enemy and Joss Whedon own it all. I'm just doing this for fun, and hopefully entertainment
Reviews: Welcomed and appreciated
"Watcha' doing awake?" Buffy eyed Willow over the box of Capn Crunch sitting between them.
Willow shrugged. "Just wanted some alone time. We never seem to have any alone, girlfriend time anymore. We hardly ever catch up, y'know?"
With a sad smile, Buffy agreed. "I know Will, but as soon as we convince Wesley to keep our secret, we'll have more time. I promise. Maybe we can start patrolling together again?" She cast her best friend a sly look. "So, how's it going with Spike?"
That's right to the point, Willow thought as she served herself a bowl of cereal. "Alright, I guess. He's just so experienced and I'm not."
"There's only one way to get experience Will." Then she frowned. "But only if you want to. If he tries to force anything I swear, I'll…"
"No, no Buffy!" Willow quickly assuaged her fears. "It's not like that. He wants to have sex, for sure. And so do I, I think. But I'm a little afraid. Okay, a lot afraid."
"Of what exactly?"
"All of it, alright. Pain for one. I have a very low threshold for it. And what if we start and I'm so bad at it he just stops and leaves? And what if it is good and we become like you and Angelus, like mates and all? Would someone like Spike really want to be with someone like me for like, forever?"
Buffy shook her head to clear it. "Wow, okay. Let's take this point by point. The pain. Yeah, it hurts, but only for a minute or so and you're so into all the other sensations once it's passed you don't even remember it. And the soreness after? It's like this really great secret you get to carry around the next day." She recalled her first time with Angel and felt a rush of desire. "And I have a feeling Spike'll be big with the whole foreplay thing."
Willow giggled. "Yeah, he is." The expression on her face told Buffy that if Willow could still blush, she would be pink from head to toe.
"Alright, on to the next issue. Stopping and leaving? Come on Will, he may be a vampire but he's still a guy. Once he starts he's there 'til he's done. And believe me, we vampires, we're like energizer bunnies. Which really isn't the point anyway. You'll get so into him and he'll be so into you. All the sensations at one time, the pleasure, the closeness, all of it." Buffy put her head next to Willow's. "Can I tell you a secret?" Willow nodded. "The first time Angel and I made love, it was beyond anything I could've imagined. But after I was turned, gods Will, it was like a thousand times more intense. And every time we make love, it just gets better and bigger. I can't even describe it."
"Oh wow. Maybe a little more information than I need, but still, wow." Willow felt a bit overwhelmed.
"Okay, enough with the personal data. But as for your last worry. I have a feeling Spike already considers you his mate. But what about you?" There was real concern in her voice.
She gave Buffy a confused look. "What do you mean?"
"Well, you're not even 18 yet. You haven't really dated. Are you ready for this kind of commitment? Spike may be soulless, but he feels so deeply. He loves. I would hate to see him hurt." Despite herself, for some odd reason Buffy cared about him. The connection she felt for him surprised her.
Willow looked at Buffy with curiosity. Buffy concerned about Spike? Man, she thought, we vampires are a very odd lot.
"I do love him Buffy. At first it was as a friend, one of my best. Spike and Cordelia really got me through this the first couple of months." Buffy looked hurt by her words. "Buffy, you were trying to come to terms with it all yourself. And then you did, so quickly. I felt like such a weakling. Gods, I couldn't even look at the blood I had to drink, still makes me a little queasy."
"Willow, I was the slayer and I had Angelus. He was already my life. It seemed almost natural. I always thought I would die at the hands of a vampire, you know? Just tuned out a little different is all. Kinda like one more aspect of life on the Hellmouth. I never meant to shut you out."
"No, you didn't. You still had to save the world and all. So Spike, he helped me to learn about being all grrr." She bared her teeth as she made her best attempt at a growl, which made Buffy laugh. "And Cordelia, well she helped keep me Willow. Xander did his best, but he was still in shock and I think he was in mourning." She paused, considering her feelings. "At first I thought it would be Oz. I mean before all this, it would've been Oz. But Spike. Well, I think he's the one Buffy. Sometimes bad things happen for a really good reason. Maybe the powers, they know and we just have to wait to figure it all out." She took a breath that she really didn't need, but it was a habit that both of them couldn't break. "And you're right, I am only 17, but you were only 16 when you fell in love with Angel."
"I'm not trying to judge Willow and you don't ever need to justify to me. I just love you and I want you to be sure, is all. You have to figure it out. Love, bonding, sex, all of it, it's so great. But don't let fear be a deciding factor."
Angelus followed Spike into the library, just a little ashamed at eavesdropping on the girls. But gratified never the less that Buffy expounded the virtues of their sexual relationship. He knew she was satisfied, but it did his ego good to hear her brag it up.
"Well, sire, I see you still have it when it comes to the ladies." Spike place a cigarette between his lips but didn't light up.
"Lady. In the singular boy. It's not like the old days. No sharing. She's mine." Angelus knew Spike was touched by Buffy's concern but he would allow no efforts at gratitude on the part of his grandchilde.
"Come on now Liam. I'm partial to the little red-headed witch. No problem with that, is there? You aren't going to play the double standard are you? Buffy can only be with you but Daddy can have everyone in the house?" Spike bristled.
"No double standard. That was a long time ago. And I always shared in the day." He turned to look out at the sun streaming in the patio. Got to get more shading out there, he thought, the girls like to sit out there during the day.
He turned back to Spike. "So, what's the story? Are you taking her for your mate?"
"Would you disapprove?"
"Why would I? She seems to be satisfied with you." He tried to catch Spike's eyes, but the boy looked away. "What is it?"
Spike shook his head. "This isn't like you, being the concerned dad. It bloody well freaks me out. She young is all. She may change her mind. You heard her, she would've chosen the boy."
For all his bluster, Spike had a touch of insecurity in his voice. "Yes, if things were different. He would've undoubtedly been her first. But she's different, despite her soul she's still a vampire and that changes everything. She wants you. And once you take her as your mate, there will be no one else." The taking of a mate, when a conscious decision had been made, became a physiological thing. It was no longer a choice. It was an ingrained, physical fact. Which was why he and Darla never really stuck, he refused to take her as his life long partner. Too much of a bitch, that one, he thought.
"Yeah, but she doesn't realize all he implications yet. When she does, I guess we'll find out if she really is a 17 year old vampire or a 17 year old girl." He sounded resigned.
Angelus shook his head and laughed. "Oh for fucks sake Willie. Just take the girl. She's ready and she'll take you as her mate. You always tell me I think too much. That's never been your problem. You always act and fuck the consequences, so stop being the wanker you always accuse me of being. Do, don't think." He tapped his childe on the head with forefinger, bringing a frown to his face.
"Don't play with me Angelus, don't pretend you care."
Angel's face sobered. "I do care Willie. Always have. You're a part of this family, my familyand I don't want you to leave. Are we clear?"
With a bit of a shocked expression on his face, Spike nodded.
Buffy walked in just as Angel finished. "Thought I heard your voice, super hearing and all." She gave him that look he knew so well. "It's still early, we can sleep for a few more hours, yes?"
He gave a small chuckle. Sleep indeed. "Yes." He turned back to Spike. "Heed my words boy."
"Will's in the kitchen Spike. She felt like making pancakes. I'm sure she'll add a few mini-wheats if you ask nicely." Buffy took Angel's hand and led him out of the room.
"I need a little sleep myself actually. Late night. Are we off to the watchers' place tonight?"
"Oh yeah. Thanks for reminding me." She looked up at Angel, marveling at how gorgeous he was. "After we wake up I'm going to go on patrol, so I'll meet you guys there."
"Spike, you get Willow to Giles', I'm out on patrol with Buffy."
She smiled at him and ran her hand over his lips. "Sweet."
"Yes I am, aren't I?"
"Will you guys just get to shaggin' up in your room and give it a rest down here?"
"Oh Spike." Buffy smiled at him. "Love is good and you know it."