Chapter Three

Tara walked in the bedroom where Willow sat waiting on her. She looked in Willow's eyes seeing sadness there. It made Tara feel bad for her love but she also knew she had to stand her ground where the magic usage was concerned. She had to do it if for no other reason than for Willow's safety. She knew Willow was on the road to do permanent damage to herself and possibly those around her and it pained her deeply.

"Tara I don't want to fight with you over this," Willow said softly. "I love you and I don't wanna lose you. I promise I will go without magic for one week; if you will just give me a chance."

Tara looked again at Willow whose eyes were begging. "I love you too Willow. I just am afraid for you and what will happen if you don't stop this." Tara caressed Willow's cheek as she spoke. "I don't want you to have to prove anything to me but, for your own self, I will accept your promise of not using for a week." Worry creased Tara's face as she accepted Willow's offer. Part of her wanted to believe Willow could do it for her but the larger part of her felt Willow was setting herself up for a big let down because she wouldn't be able to go a week without the magic.

Willow's face beamed with delight as she put her arms around Tara. "I'm so glad to have you in my life Tara," she kissed her passionately.

"We should get some sleep now," Tara said as she laid her emotionally worn out body down on the bed. She wasn't ready for intimacy and that scared her. She didn't want to pull away in that way but it was happening. She hoped that, in time, she could be relaxed enough with Willow to share her love in that way but not this night for certain.

- - - - - - - - -

The next evening, Buffy and crew had decided to throw an impromptu engagement party for Xander and Anya. Willow offered eagerly to get things ready while the others were busy with work, school and soforth. She had been working for half an hour getting things ready. 'Just one little spell to speed things along, it won't hurt and Tara will never know.'

When the gang arrived Tara noticed right away that the party was a little extravagant. She looked at Willow with questioning eyes. "Tara I've been working hard all day and-" she trailed off as Tara turned and started talking to Dawn and her friend Janice who were planning to go out for a bit shortly, having met Buffy's demand of at least appearing at the party.

Willow looked at Tara to gauge the situation. Her stomach was getting a sinking feeling. 'How are you going to get out of this one Rosenberg! You know Tara isn't stupid!' "Tara?" Willow questioned softly.

"Later Willow," Tara gave her an assuring look. She knew Willow had promised no magic for a week and had to think of some sort of reprimand. 'This isn't right Tara, now you're reprimanding her like a child.' She also knew how excited Willow was for her friend getting married and planned to overlook it just this time once they spoke later.

Buffy looked at Tara with a worried glance as Willow slipped up the stairs. "She's got to stop this," Xander said trying to make his point without letting the few coworkers of his who had arrived know about the situation. He had gained a few normal friends and would rather keep them in the dark on certain things so as to keep them normal.

"Let me just go see what she's doing." Tara said quietly, more to Buffy than the rest of the party attendees.

As Tara walked in the room, she saw Willow with a leaf in her hand and some herbs. She instinctively put up a barrier spell around her. She was dumbfounded to realize she did the right thing as she heard Willow mutter, "forget."

When the flower didn't wilt, Willow looked up in surprise then utter panic spread across her face when she saw that Tara stood just inside the room. Tara's face looked blank but the tears did fall from her eyes. "I can't believe what you were going to do to me Willow!" Tara shouted which was followed by Willow hearing someone coming up the stairs.

"Tara, I-I-I panicked, I-I-I didn't mean to-" her words were cut short by the blonde putting her hand up as Buffy now stood behind her.

"No Willow! After what Glory did to me, you were going to mess with my mind! I can no longer trust you! I have to go!" Tara's anger was expressed greatly on her face but more so, her features showed great pain and anguish. "I gave my all to you Willow and you tried to alter a part of me."

"Tara please, you can't leave me," Willow begged as tears fell from her face. "I can't beat this without you Tara, I need you."

"You can't beat it with me apparently," Tara said in a somber voice that was racked with sobs. "I warned you Willow of what would happen to you if you didn't stop." She turned to leave with Willow still begging.

"Tara," Buffy said softly touching the shaking Wicca's arm. "I'll come with."

Tara please don't go," Willow said desperately.

"Will, give her some time. I'll go with her to make sure she's all right." Buffy said but knew her words weren't going to calm the situation as Tara headed out with tearstained eyes.

- - - - - - - -

The sun was just poking its way into view when Tara awoke the next morning. She was on a park bench with Buffy protectively by her side. Neither woman spoke much the night before; they just sat in their own personal grief. Tara for her love, the one she thought was true but the realization that magic was Willow's true love was sinking in. Buffy for her friend whom had somehow slipped away from everyone; this was not the Willow she knew and loved.

Buffy was feeling pain for Willow, anger for Tara being hurt like that and sadness for her friend. It seemed there was nothing more she could do so She simply sat with Tara all night till sleep overtook her. She wiped many tears from her face and gave many supporting hugs. Her heart truly bled for this woman who exuded all that was good and was somehow pushing her way through Buffy's walls making her desire to laugh and smile again. For this, Buffy knew she could never repay her. Tara was pulling Buffy from the depth of darkness, the inner-bindings of coldness and putting a little fire back in her soul. She was doing it all with a warm smile, a kind word and occasional hug or two. Tara Maclay was a true blessing in Buffy's life and Buffy was determined to stop Willow from further hurting her at any cost.

"Tara," she said softly. "Lets get you home and showered," Buffy patted her tummy. "Besides, I could use some of those funny shaped pancakes."

Tara smiled despite her sadness. "I don't know Buffy," she stammered. "I can't face Willow."

"Yes you can because you've got the slayer's strength right here," she placed her arm around Tara's waist. "It's all yours, use it for courage until we sort this mess out."

Tara somehow felt at ease with the support of the slayer. She knew her heart was in for a rough road and Willow would probably make it more rough but something deep within her being felt that, with the help of the slayer, she could make it through.