Obdurate Heart – XII
Thanks for the kind reviews! This chapter is a little longer than the others. Enjoy, hopefully.
"Wit is educated insolence."
-Aristotle
"How is the prisoner this morning?" Obi Wan felt the words fall off of his lips mechanically by this point.
The guard replied with an optimistic attitude, glancing over a shoulder before speaking. "Better, for my opinion, Sir."
"And he's been eating?" Obi Wan queried hopefully.
"Yes, actually." The guard said in a tone that suggested he was rather surprised over this turn of events.
"How did the examination turn out yesterday?" Obi Wan pushed still.
"His wounds were redressed and mended again. He worked himself into quite the frenzy. But I don't have to tell you that, if memory serves me, Sir, you were witness to it."
"Yes." Agreed Obi Wan. Part of him was satisfied that Maul was regaining his health, but the other part was understandably anxious for the same reason.
Maul was semi-conscious when Obi Wan entered the room. He lay on his back with his eyes closed, breathing slowly and gathered within himself as though he were concentrating on something. Obi Wan could sense a great aching coming from the body before him, and he wondered if Maul was trying to banish the pain or if this simply meant he was trying to sleep. Either way, as soon as Obi Wan made his next move, Maul was instantly alert, his shields up and the dull wave of pain that Obi Wan had felt cut off from him entirely. "What is it?" Maul sounded dispassionately annoyed.
"You can't tell me you aren't used to seeing me by now." Obi Wan returned.
"However expected, it is nonetheless impertinent." Maul spat back in resentment as he battled himself up onto an elbow.
"Come now, Maul, where would your frivolous insults go without my presence?" Obi Wan noticed himself behaving very cynically this morning. Somehow, he almost felt that Qui Gon would be proud were he here to observe it.
Maul gave him a dangerous glower. "Oh well you're so very considerate, you craven little Padawan dog." He sneered.
Obi Wan bristled slightly at that address. Padawan was a generally endearing and occasionally affectionate word when used among the Jedi, but on the lips of a Sith, it came off with mocking condescension. In truth, he was mildly surprised Maul even knew that word, much less used it correctly, however aberrant it was intended to be. "Compassion is the nature of a Jedi." He said almost instinctively.
"As is asininity, it would appear." Maul grunted, taking up a hand to rub gruffly over the back of his head.
"And how are you feeling this morning, My Lord?" Obi Wan continued as though whatever relationship existed between them was benevolent, deliberately steering clear of bickering.
"Do you think it wise to mock me, Jedi, or are you so pitiably impetuous that you know no better?" was the answer. Typical, really, Obi Wan expected nothing straight forward.
"It isn't my intent to mock you. I asked you how you were, now if you can find cruelty in that, by all means, feel offended." Obi Wan casually stacked two trays that lay atop the bedside table and saw to it that various other idle things were in order. "I see you've changed your mind enough to eat."
"Perhaps you should be more cautious of what I will do once my strength is regained." Maul advised, watching Obi Wan's hands with distrust.
"Yes. Precautions have been taken for that." Obi Wan lied easily, fiddling with an empty cup in one hand.
Maul seemed disappointed to hear that, whether or not he truly believed it. He unconsciously touched his fingers over his mended wound.
"But that's really some time from now." Obi Wan went on. "By the looks of things, that is."
"Your underestimation is a welcomed advantage." Maul notified.
"I wouldn't get too cocky if I were you." Obi Wan said as he gestured to Maul's side.
"Nor would I." Maul growled back, gesturing in return to Obi Wan's arm.
Obi Wan felt a flush of irritated embarrassment. "I meant to ask, is the wound still bothering you? I intend on scheduling regular exams, so you needn't worry much over it." He had to admit that he was partially giving this information in scorn.
Rather unexpectedly, that drew a smirk from Maul. "Nothing would please me more."
"Is that so?" Obi Wan gave a passive shrug. "When yesterday you all but tried to take the heads off of the guards and medical unit treating you? You aren't making a believer out of me, My Lord."
"It isn't the examinations that I enjoy, Jedi, it's the base principle on which you provide them." Maul scratched his naked chest gruffly with a stiff hand and nodded.
"Consideration?" Obi Wan presumed.
"Retaliation." Maul corrected.
"If that's the way you see it, fine." Obi Wan crossed his arms and canted his head a little. "You're being retaliated back to health."
For a moment, it seemed that Maul was genuinely amused by that. His lazy scowl was quick to return, however. "Prison's surely got to be better than this." He muttered in a slur.
"I don't pretend to know what they have in store for you." Obi Wan said carelessly. "Whatever it is, it will not be as kind as you're being treated now. But whether you will face eternal imprisonment or execution is most likely up to you."
"Up to me, is it? Will they ask me which I choose?" he replied dully, his voice a sardonic murmur.
"What you are given depends first on what you offer." Obi Wan bit his tongue a little in discomfort as he suddenly felt Qui Gon's words escaping his mouth.
Maul snorted and was silent for a moment. "Leave the negotiating to those who've made a profession of it, runt." He decided.
"I only wonder how much lenience you think you've got." Obi Wan set his hands to his hips. "If they decide that the interrogation is going nowhere, they will cut it off immediately. There won't be any time for your games."
"My games?" Maul became a bit more alert, sneering. "That is all this is—these procedures are all games. Having a Jedi Padawan watch over a prisoner? Keeping him in prime health just so that he may rot? There are fates in this existence worse than death, Jedi, and either of us would gladly damn our enemies to them, so forgive me if I don't find much sincerity in your ridiculous etiquette."
"So you would prefer it if we were barbaric?" Obi Wan deduced.
"It would be honest." Maul retorted. "Everything your precious Jedi Order is not."
Obi Wan himself rarely argued about the morals of a Jedi knight. It was no secret that while half of the galaxy admired and were grateful for the actions of the Jedi Order, half of it resented and even hated them. This fact had never truly bother Obi Wan, for he had chosen his path and did not question it. To be faced upfront with the argument of his supposed Jedi corruption, however, was something that he didn't expect to enjoy. It was like debating to a man that he should not be a man. There are simply things that have no place in changing. Nevertheless, he would indulge Maul as much as he could bear, for Qui Gon had made sense in his suggestion that it may open a lead to something important. He would accept this, if only begrudgingly. "As opposed to the Sith." Obi Wan assumed naturally.
"I wasn't speaking about the Sith. I was speaking about the Jedi. Do try and keep up, or get out and leave me be." Maul clarified.
"You scorn the Jedi for being dishonest; does this not mean you find your own order to be honest?" Obi Wan attempted to understand, but found it difficult when he did not truly desire to know.
"The Jedi and the Sith are not opposites in every aspect." Was his ambiguous reply.
"You hate the Jedi Order because it is dishonest, yet you say that the Sith is dishonest as well? Then you admit you're hypocritical." Obi Wan pieced together as he held his hands behind his back.
"Yes. That is part of the honesty of my alignment. No Jedi would admit that he is a hypocrite." Maul explained with a snort.
Obi Wan narrowed his eyes a bit. He's a complete lunatic. He decided.
"And I didn't say the Sith were dishonest. We are deceitful." Maul wasn't looking at him now as he continued on, eyes hazily searching the bed below him as though he were looking for something hidden in the sheets.
"There's a difference?" Obi Wan queried.
"Of course there is you rot-brained cur." Maul drew his hateful eyes back to Obi Wan as though waiting for some sort of challenge.
"How so?" he prodded back with a bit more genuine curiosity.
Maul wiped a hand over his mouth and grumbled. "Dishonesty is putting forth a false truth. Deceit is merely allowing one to believe in something that is false. Dishonesty is personal betrayal, deceit is clever anonymity."
Obi Wan had to say that he had never pinned Maul for being quite so analytical. He expected that Maul was the type to believe in ideals because they were embedded into him through his perverse training, but the idea of him being so reasoned in his method just seemed delusional. "I see." He uttered.
"No, you do not." Maul denied. "Do you think I don't know you're humoring me? For what foolish purpose I can't imagine. But do go on, Jedi. Convince me."
"I understand what you say just fine." Obi Wan clipped back coolly. "But I do not agree. In either case, dishonesty and deceit are both malevolent things. I find favoring one to be absurd."
"You do not believe it logical to choose the lesser of two evils?" Maul followed with disdain.
"That is the difference between you and I. At least, one among a great many. I choose neither, for I will settle for no evil." Obi Wan shook his head briefly.
Maul was staring up at him with a very unmoved glare. "How righteous of you."
"And which would you, as a Sith, choose, Maul? The greater or lesser evil?" Obi Wan opposed.
Maul rolled one shoulder and let a small snarl pass over his features. "Whichever benefits me."
Obi Wan huffed out a breath and nodded inwardly to himself. "You don't find that selfish?"
"It is my life, and they are my choices. There is a distinction between selfishness and independence." Maul's word differentiation was beginning to wear on Obi Wan's nerves.
"It is the purpose of the Jedi to maintain order and to protect innocents. It is the purpose of the Sith to do for themselves." Obi Wan enlightened.
"And so you consider your cause a nobler one?" Maul guessed.
"Yes." Obi Wan answered without hesitation.
Maul seemed annoyed at this. "We all must fend for ourselves. That goes as well for your precious innocents."
"Some of them cannot." Obi Wan said, about to conjure examples if need be before deciding to keep his point simple.
"Then those some must suffer." Maul decreed callously.
"And we are to watch as the galaxy dies needlessly under our altercations without offering them so much as an apology?"
"Can you fathom how drab it would be if everyone were to live?" said Maul darkly as he turned his head to look out at the wall across from him.
"Compassion for life is not some doggedly followed written law for the Jedi alone. It should be instinctive, inherent in us all." By this point, Obi Wan was ready to express his distaste freely.
"Well it is not." Maul sneered back. "I find no pride in playing hero for useless causes. That is the difference between you and I."
"Just how is the preservation of life useless?" Obi Wan countered dubiously. "The galaxy succumbs to death and chaos and we are to do nothing?"
"The strong survive for a reason. The strong survive in order to maintain strength. But you, you and your doting idiocy would sacrifice the strong to spare the weak, you would perpetuate the weakness."
"I'm sure our perceptions of weakness are unique in their own regard." Obi Wan lowered his eyebrows. "I spared you didn't I? Are you weak, Maul?"
Maul's chest visibly expanded with a growl, his eyes burning. "You really are stupid, aren't you?" he shouted, and Obi Wan took a bit of a flinch before he could stop himself.
"Why am I stupid?" Obi Wan demanded, a little embarrassed and more than irritated. "Because I've found a loophole in your unconditional judgment?"
"Get out!" Maul snarled, whipping up his cup in a sudden motion and throwing it sharply. It bounced off of Obi Wan's shoulder harmlessly, but startled him nonetheless. "I am not one of your pathetic helpless weaklings that needs saving from the exalted Jedi Order. You did not 'spare' me out of compassion. It was out of regulation."
Obi Wan bit back a grunt, one fist clenching at his side. Mostly he hated the fact that Maul was right. He might have killed Maul had Qui Gon not been there to discourage such an action. As noble as compassion might have been, he did not feel it towards Maul. He had no desire to keep Maul alive, but he was willing to follow the orders of his master without question. It was the right thing to do all the same. Wasn't it? "You could try gratitude for once, instead of resentment."
"Gratitude towards you?" Maul scoffed, still at the edge of his nerves.
"Yes, gratitude towards the order that saved your life." Obi Wan confirmed.
"I will never be grateful towards the Jedi for anything." He hissed, glowering heatedly.
"I wouldn't expect that you will. You're far too unappreciative for that." Obi Wan shook his head and for once met Maul's glare.
"But you don't mean gratitude for the Jedi Order, do you?" Maul continued. "You mean gratitude for yourself. You want me to be grateful for your actions, or for your sparing my life. You think that perhaps gratitude would make this task easier to swallow."
Obi Wan tightened his jaw. "I don't want anything from you. I don't need anything from you."
"That isn't true, now is it?" Maul drove his fist into the bed. "You want information."
"Yes, but like gratitude, that is something you won't give. Do you realize how contradictive that is?" Obi Wan felt his voice rise. "You do only for yourself, and yet you would damn yourself blindly for the Sith?"
"I was damned from the start!" Maul snapped. "There is no reason to betray my alliance when my fate is sealed regardless. Don't accuse me of being contradictive. You wouldn't dream of betraying your order to aid yourself, and yet you arrogantly assume that I shall do just that!"
Obi Wan hesitated, his anger growing. "And why not? The Sith would betray you without a second thought, and they already have. They've left you here."
"As has the Jedi Order you!" Maul gestured to the room around them with a swift hand.
"That's preposterous!" Obi Wan broke out suddenly. "The Jedi have not abandoned me."
"Haven't they? If watching over me was really so important, a true Jedi knight would be doing it. Your master is obviously more experienced, why does he not accompany you? Or has he got better things to do that sit for his pitiful, clumsy apprentice?" Maul surmised.
Better things to do? For some reason, an image of Qui Gon and Anakin appeared in his mind. The two connected so well. Whenever those two were together, Obi Wan felt oddly out of place. What a perfect opportunity to get rid of you. Uttered part of him very quickly as he gazed upon Maul, and a bit of a self-disgusted gasp caught in his chest. He grit his teeth as he replied. "It's nothing like that." Obi Wan turned hastily, suddenly ready to make his departure as soon as possible.
"I'm sure." Maul said dryly.
Obi Wan jerked back around, his braid whipping behind him. "You're insane!"
"And you're pretentious!" Maul shot back, rising up a little.
Obi Wan bit down on his tongue hard and quickly stormed out.