Boot upside your head!

The Shinobi's Guide to Television
By Kaori

"Are they loony? After what happened yesterday I didn't think they'd want us anywhere near the television studio!" Ino gasped. "Well…not you guys anyway." She added. Those that were at the studio yesterday glared at her.

"Well it's all water under the bridge now." Shrugged Asuma.

"You mean water in the newsroom…" Kiba mumbled.

Despite the damages to the news studio and the aneurism suffered by Watanabe, the assistant station manager still asked for them back because, quite frankly, they couldn't get anyone else.

"So what are we going to be doing today?" asked Sakura.

"Apparently, commercials." Kurenai said.

Surprisingly, they found themselves in the presence of Miharu once more.

"Hi!" she practically lit up the entire room with her smile. "I didn't think I'd see you again!"

"You're not going to make me wear a dress again are you?" twitched Sasuke.

"You mean you don't want to?" blinked Miharu and she cocked her head to one side. "But you looked so cute?"

"Err.." coughed Asuma, before the situation could progress into something dangerous. "Can we see the scripts for the commercials we'll be doing?"

An hour later…

"All right, places everyone!" Miharu smiled from the director's seat. "Lights!"

"Rukas Commercial, take one." Yawned Shikamaru as he snapped the clapboard in front of the camera.

"Cue music!" barked Miharu; Kakashi gave her the thumbs up from the sound booth. "Camera!" Asuma nodded. "Aaand…action!"

The lights came up on a set made up like a typical Konoha street. Sasuke was dressed up like a noodle vendor and stood behind a prop counter set up in the middle of the set. Naruto, Kiba and Chouji were sitting in front pretending to order. Then the lyrics to the music playing in the background kicked in.

You keep sayin' you've got somethin' for me

Somethin' called love, but confess.

Ino and Sakura walked in from the right side of the set wearing white baby doll tee shirts under leather jackets, leather mini skirts, and thigh high boots. Once they

You've been meesin' where you shouldn'ta been messin'

And now someone else is gettin' all your best.

As the two passed the stall all the boys leaned over to look up their skirts. Both girls suddenly turn around and kick Naruto and Chouji in the head before rounding on Kiba.

These boots are made for walkin', and that's just what they'll do

One of these days these boots are gonna walk right over you.

"Cut!" yelled Miharu.

"Why hit only us!" whined Kiba.

"Yeah! Sasuke was looking too!" moaned Naruto.

"No I wasn't." lied Sasuke.

"Ah! You crushed my chips!" cried Chouji.

"We'll crush more than that if you try that again!" yelled Ino and Sakura.

"People, people! Focus!" barked Miharu. "Let's try this again…" she glanced at Shikamaru.

"Right…(sigh) Rukas Commercial, take two."

"Action!"

Two minutes later…

SLAP! "KIBA!"

"OW! I don't care it was worth it!"

"DIE!"

SLAP! WHACK! POW! BAM!

"Ino, Sakura, please stop killing my student."

"Let's try this again…"

"Rukas Commercial, take three…"

Five minutes later…

"Cut." A bored voice called.

"Hey! No fair Hatake-san I'm supposed to yell 'cut'!" Miharu pouted.

"Sorry Miharu-chan." Kakashi said, his eyes doing that 'u' thing when he smiles.

"Miharu-chan?" Kurenai raised an eyebrow at him once again for this blatant familiarity. Kakashi shrugged.

"I keep hearing this grinding noise on the track."

"Grinding noise?" parroted Miharu and looked at Asuma. Asuma shrugged and looked at Shikamaru. Shikamaru shook his head and looked at Kurenai. Kurenai blinked and looked at Hinata. Hinata blushed slightly and looked at Shino. Shino…well we can't really tell what Shino did but he looked in Ino's general direction. Ino frowned and looked at Sakura. Sakura cocked her head to the side and looked at Sasuke. Sasuke glared and looked at Naruto. Naruto stuck his tongue out at Sasuke and looked at Kiba. Kiba put his hands up in a placating manner and looked at Chouji. Chouji didn't notice any of this and continued munching from his bag of chips.

"CHOUJI!" everyone else groaned.

"What?" blinked Chouji.

"Now that that's taken care of, let's try once again."

"Rukas Commercial, take four. So troublesome…"

"Cut!" yelled Sakura before they even got started.

"What now?" moaned Miharu.

"I need to go to the bathroom."

"All right, we'll break for lunch and then try again."

After lunch…

"Okay, is everybody ready now?" Miharu asked. Nods all around. "Perfect. Lights! Cue music!"

"Rukas Commercial, take four and a half." Said Shikamaru.

"Camera! Action!"

Miraculously they made it through the entire commercial without incident.

"Cut! That was excellent! Well done everyone!" clapped Miharu.

"Errr…Yamashita-san?" Asuma tapped the young woman on the shoulder.

"Yes? What is it?"

"Ummm…we ran out of film halfway through."

"AAAAARRRRGHHHH!"

What a shame. All of that hard work gone to waste. Oh well, we got a laugh out of it. More to come, I promise! Oh yeah, and I don't own the song "These Boots Are Made for Walking" and I don't remember who the singer is...so yeah.