A/N: Hey! This is my first fic here. It's kind of short but it gets the point across. Starfire/ robin fluffy goodness in Starfire's point of view. I wrote this while listening to the All-American Reject's "Straitjacket Feeling" one day when I was really frustrated. So it's angsty too. Named after an Audioslave song, just for fun. Enjoy and please review.
The other day I came to thinking about my sister. Not a word has come from her since I banished her from Tameran. I should not expect her to communicate anyway. What I did was unforgivable.
So was what she did. How had I been so foolish as to believer her every word and so openly welcome her into my life here? True, it is my belief that everyone who works for the side of good is my friend. But my own sister is not my friend?
Yes, she tried to kill me. She is still my sister. Is she truly evil? Should I be forgiving the next time I see her? Or bitter? Maybe I should take after Beast Boy. Terra tried to kill us, but he still loved her. Then again, he never saw Terra after he admitted it.
I do not wish to go ten years without seeing Blackfire. We were raised together on Tameran. Though she always did everything better. I actually grew accustomed to not being in the spotlight. That was her place, not mine.
It was the Titans who changed it. I was a foreigner, so everything I did wrong was noticed and corrected. I had attention for once, up until she came here.
What I need to do is stop living in my sister's shadow. I work for good, not evil. And I refuse to marry a green blob named Glrdlskelchhh. It is not who I am. I am Starfire of the Teen Titans.
"I am my own person," I whispered softly to myself. Sighing, I realized I had gotten lost in my thoughts again. The room came back into focus, as did the photo album on my lap. The bottom picture on the page was of my sister when she came to visit. Now I understood why I drifted off. The picture brought back bad memories.
There would be nothing for me now if I had never left Tameran. Blackfire would have just walked all over me for the rest of my life. I never would have ruled Tameran for the few minutes I did and I never would have dreamed of overthrowing my sister.
"Starfire?" Robin's voice came from the entryway of my room. Startled, I turned to face him. "I heard you talking to yourself. I came to see what's up."
"Um… the ceiling?" I replied unsurely. I knew by the smile on Robin's face that what I had said had been incorrect. My sister would never have been laughed at for not knowing the right words.
"I meant how are you," Robin sat beside me, taking a look at the photo album stuck on that page. "You seem sort of sad."
"I am. These pictures…my sister…" Yet again, I did not know the right words.
"It must be hard for you. Your sister betrayed you and almost had you marry that…thing," Robin commented reassuringly. "But you're handling it well."
No words came from my mouth as I finally turned the scrapbook to the next page. My cheeks flushed as I saw what the page contained. I had forgotten my joys with the camera and how Robin taught me how to use it by taking pictures of us together. When they were developed, I devoted a section of pink pages and hearts to them. I never thought he would have seen it.
"This was from when I taught you how to use a camera. That was fun," Robin smiled, his hand brushing where mine was at the corner of the page. It lingered on top of mine, the heat from it warming my own hand.
If Blackfire were here, she would have known what this meant. Was it a symbol of friendship? Of hate? Or of something deeper? Why could I never understand?
There I went again, thinking of only my sister and comparing myself to her. It is time for me to understand human displays of emotions for myself… with a little help from my friends. Robin looked at me, as if wanting to know if this was okay. Was it? My heart yearned to comprehend what he was trying to show me.
"I do not understand what you are doing," I muttered meekly. His hand tightened around mine, our fingers interlocking. The thoughts of having this be a symbol of hatred were easily erased from my mind. This felt too good to be wrong.
"Star… you're not a very good liar. Something's up. I did what I did because… well… I just wanted to let you know that… well…, I'm, uh, here for you," Robin stammered, his cheeks turning pale pink.
"Thank you," I flung my arms around him, bursting into tears. The photo album hit the floor of the room but I no longer cared. The photographs were not there to ruin my life. They were there for me to remember the past and how much I have changed. Even this situation I had been so down about could be made better. "Even after all she has done for me, I cannot pull myself to hate her. I do not understand."
"She's always going to be your sister. You've just gotta let go," Robin smiled, ending our embrace with a soft kiss to my forehead.
"Thank you, again," I said confidently. For once, I was no longer at a loss for words. It was time to be Starfire, not Blackfire's little sister. It was time for my own life.